Shannon's Daughter (49 page)

“Um.
 
That sounds nice.”
 
She nestled
closer, turning her face up.
 
“It will
take some getting used to though.”

“No
hurry, love.”

“Were
you sad, when Jenny died, I mean?”

“A
bit.
 
Sad for her and her family.
 
Sad for what never happened.
 
But I also felt relieved, for Jenny and for
myself.”

“I’m
sorry I wasn’t there to comfort you.
 
You
must have felt so alone.”

He let
out a long sigh.
 
“It’s over now.
 
And I want very much to get on with
life.
 
So no regrets, all right?”

“All
right.”
 
She pressed her lips to his jaw.
 
“If we’re going out, I’ll need to get ready.
 
I want to look my best for our date.
 
Where are we going?”

“You
chose.
 
Make a reservation and I’ll pick
you up in one of those shiny yellow cabs at eight.”
 
He reluctantly untangled himself and
stood.
 
“And if you have any engagements
planned with Gerry or any other man in the next two weeks, I’d appreciate it if
you’d cancel them.
 
While I’m here, I
intend to occupy your every waking hour.
 
Once I’ve gone you can make it up to them, can’t you?”

Peg
snaked her arms around his neck and grinned up at him.
 
“There’s nothing to cancel, and no one to
make anything up to, silly man.
 
And I
still don’t see why you can’t stay here.
 
It would be so much more convenient, for ‘occupying’ all my waking
hours.”

“But
highly improper, given the newly elevated status of our relationship.”

“Newly
elevated?”

“We are
no longer engaged in a clandestine affair, sweetheart.
 
This is all-out courtship, or it will be if
you’ll let me have my head.”
 
He saw the
waver in her gaze, the instant of surprise, before she grinned again.
 

“I
see.
 
Is that a promise or a warning?”

“Take
it any way you like.
 
I’ve never courted
a woman before, so it’s probably a bit of both.
 
I’m afraid I’ll be making it up as I go along.”

Her
grin softened to a smile.
 
“Since I’ve
never let a man court me before, we’ll both be making it up as we go
along.
 
Sounds kind of
exciting to me.”

He
pulled her to him, lowering his face to within inches of hers.
 
“I’m so glad you think so.”
 

She
stopped him just short of the kiss he’d been anticipating since his
arrival.
 
“But we’ll take our time, won’t
we?
 
I’m not sure what you expect of me.”

Lifting
his head, he was struck by the uncertainty in her eyes.
 
“I don’t expect anything, but I hope for a
great many things.
 
And yes, we’ll take
all the time you need.”
 
The uncertainty
faded.
 
“Now what does a man have to do
to get a proper kiss from you, beyond flying across an ocean and risking life
and limb in New York traffic?”

She
drew his head down, cool fingers caressing the back of his neck.
 
“Just ask.”

Chapter
Forty-five

Hindsight
told him he should have taken those words to heart.
 
If he’d only
asked
her, they might have cemented their relationship in those
first days.
 
If he’d been bold enough to
take out the ring—tucked in his pocket on more than one of their “dates”—fallen
to one knee and said something traditional like “marry me,” there was the
possibility she might have said “yes” before she had a chance to think too much
about the direction that would turn them.
 

As it
was, they took advantage of all New York had to offer, laughed more than usual,
made love at every available opportunity, and never once talked seriously about
the future in general or theirs in particular.
 

He was
aware of the warning signs, as Peg repeatedly emphasized how busy her work with
the foundation kept her, how much she enjoyed the fundraising and how many
young artists, fledgling ensembles and deserving programs had been funded
through her efforts.
 
She mentioned
Michael’s increasingly fragile health with pointed frequency, revealing his
plan to purchase property in Florida which she would be refurbishing for him in
the coming months.
 
Too happy to simply
spend time with her in this new context, he chose to ignore them.

“You’re
a busy lady.
 
I can see I won’t have to
worry about your getting bored.”
 
Across
the candlelit table, Peg seemed nervous on this, their final evening together.
 

“And
your schedule must be full, with the orchestra and the quartet.
 
I’m surprised you could take the time to come
to New York right now.”
 
Her eyes wide
and luminous, she flashed him a suggestive smile.
 
“I’m so glad you did, though.”

“Are
you?”

She
looked stunned, which he told himself was a positive sign.
 
“Of course I am.
 
It’s been wonderful having you here.
 
Too brief, but we’ve made the most of our
time, haven’t we?”

“I’m
not so sure.
 
Frankly, there were things
I’d hoped to do that we haven’t gotten around to.”

“Like
what?”

Now was
the moment, the only possible opportunity before he went back to London with no
idea of when they’d be together again.
 
Reaching in his pocket, he slipped the tip of his index finger into the
ring and withdrew his hand slowly, so as not to call too much attention.
 
“I know this is all new, and I don’t mean to
put any pressure on you,” he paused.
 
That wasn’t true.
 
Pressing the
issue was the only way to keep her from avoiding it.
 
“What I mean to say is, you know very well
how I feel about you, brat.”
 
He hoped
his eyes, as they passed tenderly over her face, sufficiently conveyed those
feelings.

She
took a slow sip of water, her expression suddenly sober.
 
“Yes.”

Resting
his hand causally on the table, where the candlelight caught the cluster of
stones on the ring, he took a deep breath.
 
“Then you must know it would make me very happy if at some point you
agreed to wear this.”

Peg
blinked down at his hand, drawing an audible breath.
 
“Your grandmother’s ring?”

“I know
it’s
old fashioned and not very showy, but it
represents everything I want to say to you.”

She
looked up slowly.
 
“It does?”

In
spite of the tension twisting his shoulders, he smiled.
 
“You’re suddenly very short on words,
sweetheart.
 
Surely you can’t be that
surprised?”

Shaking
her head gently, she gazed at his hand.
 
“What exactly is it you want to say to me?”

“I know
I can’t offer you anything you don’t already have.
 
I know your life is full without me.
 
What I want most to hear you say is that
you’ll think about making a space in it for me, for us.”

He
might just as well have asked her to elope on the spot.
 
Her eyes flew open in alarm.
 
Her lips parted as though to speak and then
clamped shut in a tight line.
 
He watched
with oddly detached fascination as her chest rose and fell rapidly and a pulse
fluttered in her throat.
 
When she
finally spoke, it was with a rush of breathy, disjointed words.
 
“But, you
know.
. .I
mean I’ve told you. . .of course things are different, but. . .well not
everything has changed.”

He held
up his hand, the one without the ring.
 
“I don’t expect an answer now, darling.
 
And yes, I’m well aware of all you’ve said on the subject in the
past.
 
What I’m hoping is that with time
and some effort on my part, you might change your mind.”

“But
I’m happy with what we have, Kendall.
 
Especially now that we don’t have to hide.
 
I’m just not
sure.
.
.well actually I
am
sure.
 
I’m not cut out for the kind of thing you’re
talking about.”

“Marriage,
you mean?
 
How can you be so sure?
 
You’ve never tried it, as far as I’m aware.”

She let
out an impatient huff.
 
“Of course not,
but I just know.
 
I’m too self-centered,
too spoiled.
 
I like things the way I
like them.”

“And
you don’t think everyone feels that way?
 
Still, every day thousands of self-centered, spoiled people decide they
love each other enough to try to make it work.
 
All I ask is that you keep an open mind.
 
We’ve rubbed along well enough in the past for weeks on end.
 
You’re not trying to say we’re incompatible,
are you?”

“No,
not at all.
 
But.
. .marriage is
different.
 
It’s permanent, day in and
day out.
 
You’d get sick of me running
off to do my job and paying attention to so many things that aren’t about
you.
 
Husbands expect their wives to take
care of them, and I’d never have enough time to take care of you properly with everything
else I have to do.
 
And I couldn’t leave
New York, and you can’t leave London.
 
There are so many complications we’d never be able to work out.”

He
waited for her to finish, watching as she finally folded her lips and stared
down at her untouched dinner.
 
“Sounds to
me as if you might have given this at least a little thought.
 
Not quite along the lines I’d hoped, but at
least you’ve considered some of the things we’d be facing.
 
Together.”

A blush
colored her cheeks.
 
“Ever since you told
me you’re free now, I’ve thought about what I’d do if you asked me.
 
I get so confused between what I’ve always
thought was true and what might be if things were different.”
 
She pushed a sprig of parsley around the edge
of her plate.
 
“But you’re not asking me,
are you?”

“Not
formally, no.
 
I could, if you’d
like.”
 
He moved as if to push away from
the table.

“No!
 
I’m not ready for that.
 
If all you want is for me to think about it,
I guess I’m already doing that.”

“And
will you promise to keep an open mind?”

She
nodded slowly.
 
“I promise, although I
don’t see how it will change things.”

Taking
her hand, he stroked the backs of her fingers with his thumb.
 
“I would change a great many things if I
thought I could have a life with you, Peg.
 
Maybe not right away, maybe not even in a year or two, but with time, if
you’ll give me enough, I believe we could work things out.”

Her
smile, tremulous and a little sad, moved him to press her hand tightly between
his palms and wish they were in a less public place.
 
“You used to try to tell me you weren’t the
man for me.
 
Maybe you were right.
 
You’re too good for me.”

“Not
true.
 
If that were the case, I would
have resigned my position with the orchestra, put my landladies on notice and
booked a one-way flight.
 
I’m selfish too.
 
I’m not ready to throw over everything I’ve
worked for just yet, even for you.
 
But
I’ll chip away at it, as long as I know you’ll wait for me.”

The
smile widened and she curled her fingers round his.
 
“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Have I
mentioned that I adore you, Anna Margaret Shannon, always and forever?”

“Not
recently.
 
I just assumed.”
 
Her eyes glistened with tears.

“And
may I make a similar assumption?”

“Oh,
yes.
 
I love you, Kendall Gregg.
 
Always and forever and
beyond.”

They
spent his final hours in New York sealing the agreement with unbridled
passion.
 
Just after dawn, he returned to
the hotel to collect his bags and caught a cab for the airport, carrying in his
mind the vision of Peg sleeping between musk-scented sheets, her arms wrapped tightly
around his pillow.
 
If he was confident
of having accomplished at least part of his mission, he was also aware that if
Peg had her way, things would move forward at her pace, not his.