Read Shamus In The Green Room Online
Authors: Susan Kandel
Gambino looked me in the eye. “Do you know what this is?”
“A small, round hole. Maybe a third of an inch in diame-
ter. So?”
As soon as I’d said it, I knew.
I’d been right the first time.
“That’s right,” he said angrily, “now you see my problem. I
get here a couple of hours ago, see the broken glass, the
patched-up window, have a look around, and find this. A fuck-
ing bullet hole. Somebody fired a thirty-eight special into this
house. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“Yes,” I said in a small voice.
“Were you here when this happened?” He was gripping my
shoulders now, hard.
“Yes.”
“Jesus! Why the hell didn’t you tell me? Are you crazy?”
I pulled away from him. “Why don’t you give me a minute
to explain?”
“Fine.” He yanked out his chair and sat down.
I leaned against the wall, hoping it would swallow me up.
“It was this morning, early. I heard a noise. I tried to call 911,
but I couldn’t find my phone. Your cell phone was out of juice.
I waited a long time. I didn’t know what to do.”
“You could’ve gotten out of there,” he said. “Screamed for
help—”
“I wasn’t thinking straight,” I protested. “When I finally
saw the broken window, I thought the paperboy had done it.
The newspaper was right outside.”
“So you cleaned up the mess. Good-bye, evidence.”
“I’m sorry.”
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“I know you’re sorry,” he said quickly. “You’re always sorry.
One day it’s going to be too late for sorry. No matter what
I say, you just refuse to think, for god’s sakes.”
“Are you done now?” I asked.
He looked at me like he was trying to make up his mind
about something, which didn’t exactly make me happy.
I held his gaze.
He keep looking.
“I can beat you at this game,” I said, not blinking.
“Come here,” he said, holding out his arms. I fell into them.
“This isn’t about you, Cece.”
But it was about me. About me not being able to let things
go. About me thinking I was immune to danger.
“I’m scared for you,” he said.
I pulled away from him, ashamed.
“And I’m angry at myself,” he continued. “Furious, actu-
ally. This whole thing is turning out so wrong. I keep making
mistake after mistake.”
I was confused. Were we talking about the same thing?
“What does this have to do with the woman who keeps calling
you?” I asked. “Is she one of the mistakes you’re talking about?”
Instead of answering, he walked into the kitchen. There
was a Baggie on the sink. He picked it up and stuffed it into his
pocket.
“What is that?” I asked.
“The slug I took out of the wall.” He put on his jacket.
“What about the woman?”
“Look, I can’t talk about that now.”
I was afraid to ask. But I couldn’t go through it again. I
couldn’t make the same mistake twice. “Are you having an
affair with her?” I whispered.
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“Of course not.”
“Then who is she?”
“She’s not your concern.”
“What does she have to do with the bullet in my window?
Was she shooting at me?”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re not the target, Cece.”
That’s when it dawned on me. “You’re talking about Julio
Gonzalez, aren’t you?” I followed Gambino to the front door.
“But Julio Gonzalez can’t be responsible. He’s in jail.”
“Things are complicated.”
“Is she one of those complications?”
“Let it go, Cece. I’ve got to get to the lab.”
“Now? I thought you were going to come with me to Rafe’s
party.”
“I’ve got more important things to deal with,” he said, his
hand on the knob. He turned to face me. “I’m trying to keep
an innocent woman from getting hurt.”
I wondered later if he meant me or her.
Nine-thirty on the Venice canals. The Chinese lanterns
were lit and the air smelled like jasmine.
Rafe opened the door. Music spilled into the night. He
looked like hell—thin, pale, and drunk.
“What do you think?” He had on a vintage smoking jacket,
maroon satin with a black medallion motif. “Wardrobe let me
borrow it.”
Will, resplendent in an oversize Hawaiian shirt, stood by
his side. “Why are you opening the door? You’re the fucking
star, man.”
“You’re right,” said Rafe. “Why don’t you make yourself
useful and get me another drink?”
Will looked at him for a minute, then walked away.
“I thought you weren’t a method actor,” I said.
“People change.” He lost his balance for a minute. “Fuck.”
A beautiful redhead wearing peacock-feather earrings grabbed
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him under the arm. “Sorry,” he said, drifting away with her.
“Make yourself at home.”
Inside, it was smoky and loud and decorator perfect. A sin-
gle orchid stood in an otherwise empty modular bookcase,
which covered one wall like honeycomb. Hothouse-flower-
type women leaned against a mirrored console. A fire crackled
in the fireplace. Will was sulking by the bar. Oblivious, Rafe
poured himself another drink. His forehead was slick with
sweat. The redhead was slipping an oyster down her throat.
A cool hand touched my shoulder. I turned. Fredericka,
Rafe’s assistant. She looked ethereal in a pale blue halter and
billowing white silk pants. I must’ve looked like the grim
reaper by comparison in an ankle-length cobweb of black cro-
chet. At least the skirt was tight and semisheer. I could still get
arrested in certain Muslim countries.
“Long time no see,” I said, smiling. I should’ve worn my
red satin hourglass dress. It was by Philip Hulitar, the house
designer for Bergdorf Goodman in the fifties. Philip Hulitar
understood that there is no substitute for a long-line bullet
bra. It suddenly occurred to me that underwire could save the
bat-wing-sleeve sweater. Maybe not. In any case, I didn’t have
the heart for red after that scene with Gambino.
“Can I get you anything? Champagne?” Fredericka grabbed
a glass off a passing tray.
“I’ve already filled my quota today. I’m a little worried
about Rafe, though. Is he okay?”
“Rafe?”
His smoking jacket was hanging open now. He had lemon-
yellow board shorts on underneath. He and the redhead were
laughing too loudly together. “Yes, Rafe. Your employer. Does
he always drink this much?”
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“He’s got a lot going on, you know?” She took a sip of the
champagne.
“I was just asking.”
There was a loud crash upstairs. I looked at Fredericka, who
downed the rest of her glass without commenting. Nerves of
steel.
“I like the way the house looks,” I volunteered.
“Will did it. He’s got an amazing eye for composition. He
sees a frame and knows how to fill it. It’s an art, really.”
There was another crash from upstairs.
“What was that?” I asked.
“Oh, nothing, I’m sure.” She looked over at Will, who was
already halfway up the stairs. “Have you met Steve?”
“Steve?”
“Terrell. You really have to meet him. He’s the director of
the film. The current director, I should say. Will fired the first
one, Eleanor Lonner. He said it’s always a mistake to work
with people you don’t know from Adam. Too many surprises
there.”
That was an understatement.
“Do you like Eleanor’s work?” Fredericka asked. “She did
that Amelia Earhart movie, in black and white? I thought she
had a really provocative vision for Dash!, but it’s not like my
opinion counts for shit around here. Steve!” she called out. A
short, dark man with thick black glasses and several days’
growth of beard extricated himself from a conversation with a
shorter, darker man and came over. He moved in a way that
was supposed to denote street cred, but I suspected a round of
hip-hop classes.
Steve Terrell kissed Fredericka with more fervor than was
necessary. Her girlfriend, Lana, appeared from out of nowhere
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and wrapped a proprietary arm around the former’s tiny waist.
Steve Terrell was not fazed. Diamonds glinted in both of his
ears. You are the man, said the little voice in his head. A beast.
I introduced myself. He sat down on a large, black leather
couch and patted the spot next to him. “B and B Italia. Six
thousand euros, with the designer discount. And Rafe’s got the
bed to match.”
He looked at my blank expression.
“Sorry. I’m kind of passionate about design. Brad Pitt and I
like to hang out with Frank Gehry.”
This seemed to require a response, so I said, “Cool.”
He grinned. His teeth were like beacons in the night. They
matched his white Nikes. “So. Cece Caruso. I gotta tell you,
your book was really intense. I derived a lot of inspiration
from it.”
Throwing caution to the wind, I sat down next to him.
“Thank you.”
“No, really, I’m not bullshitting you. When I saw the book
was by a woman, I had my doubts. I’m coming clean with you
here, okay? But you’ve got balls.”
I crossed my legs primly.
“I said to Will, Will, that girl can talk dirty. She gets the vi-
olence of the language, she gets how it’s a perfect metaphor for
the corruption of society, you know what I’m saying? My work
is like that, too. Hard, tough, spare. Red Harvest, that’s my
Hammett. I don’t know how many corpses piled up in that
one.” He laughed. “You kind of lose track after a while, you
know what I’m saying? That’s what I’m bringing to the film.
Violence. Action. Have you seen my movie Punched ? Will
loved it. Rafe, too. About Jack Johnson, the prizefighter? I won
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a Golden Globe. Two hundred million domestic.” He was
ready to burst.
I came clean about not having seen Punched, and started to
point out that Hammett in fact had reduced the level of vio-
lence in each of his successive books (there are only four mur-
ders in The Maltese Falcon, and all occur offscreen), but Steve
Terrell wasn’t having any of it. He wanted to talk chairs. He’d
recently acquired a new Cappellini chair, which cost $3,000
with the designer discount and resembled a bird in flight, and
was planning to bid on a set of twenty-four Artifort little tulip
chairs, upholstered in black suede, at Sotheby’s next Saturday.
Steve Terrell studied my legs, then asked if I’d ever actually
seen a little tulip chair. When I confessed my ignorance, he in-
vited me to join him for the auction.
Rafe ambled over at that point and practically fell into my
lap. “Sorry, Cece. Why am I always apologizing to you?” He
pushed his hair out of his face. “Anyway, don’t listen to a thing
this guy is telling you. He hasn’t got a pot to piss in.” Steve
Terrell looked uncomfortable. On the set, he outranked Rafe,
but we weren’t on the set now.
I sensed it was a good moment for me to get up. I wandered
through the dining room, past a trio of semiclad starlets clus-
tered in front of an Andy Warhol triptych of Rafe, and into the
kitchen, which at my parties is always the central hub of activ-
ity. Rafe’s kitchen was as spotless as a laboratory, and not ex-
actly hopping. Two men in wraparound aprons were covering
large, plastic trays of grilled shrimp with tin foil.
An angry-looking woman with a frying pan in her hand
stomped through the swinging door. Will’s assistant, Kat, fol-
lowed close upon her heels.
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“Would you slow down?” Kat panted.
“Boys!” the woman snapped. “Do not forget the bruschetta!”
“Take pity on me,” Kat pleaded, bending down to pick up a
yellow file folder that had dropped out of her hand. She pulled
up her low-rider jeans and tugged down her tie-dyed wife
beater. “Won’t you reconsider? We’re expecting over a hundred
people tonight. You can’t just take the food and go!”
“Watch me. Get into the van, now!” the woman directed
her helpers. She opened the stainless-steel fridge and removed
six bottles of salad dressing, which she placed in an empty
wine box.
Kat turned to me. “Cece.” She handed me the file. “Can I
ask you a huge favor? Can you please run this up to Will’s
desk? I have to deal with this situation right now.”
The swinging door swung open yet again.
“Fredericka! Thank god.” Kat grabbed the file back out of
my hand and was about to hand it to Fredericka when the lat-
ter burst into tears.
“What is it?” Kat asked, concerned.
“Lana’s leaving me,” Fredericka said, sobbing.
The caterer uncorked a bottle of pinot noir and poured
some into a Dixie cup. “For pain and suffering,” she said, suck-
ing it down. “Mine, I mean.”
“What happened?” asked Kat, on the verge of tears herself.
“It’s Will’s fault,” Fredericka wailed.
“I’ll second that,” the caterer said.
“Asshole,” murmured Kat.
“Weeks and weeks ago, he walked in on something that was
nothing,” Fredericka said. “I don’t know why he told Lana
about it. He promised he wouldn’t.”
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