Authors: Alex Morgan
“Okay, this may not be real, but it's fun!” she said.
I got up from my desk chair and started hopping on one foot in a circle as Kara read the words of the chant to me again. When I got to the part about making the good luck flow, I accidentally hopped right onto the leg of my computer chair.
“Whoa!” I said as I toppled to the floor.
The chair rolled away and fell onto its side as I heard Kara yelling, “Devin! Devin! Are you okay?”
I staggered up and grinned into the computer camera. “No broken bones. I think I'll live. But I don't think it's a good sign that I had bad luck right in the middle of the good luck chant!”
Kara laughed just as my dad stuck his head into the room. He noticed the desk chair toppled over and looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “Devin, honey, are you all right?”
“Kara and I were just trying to undo my bad luck. It didn't work out so great,” I said as I pointed to the chair.
“Hi, Kara!” My dad leaned into the camera and waved. “How are things going?”
They chatted for a few moments while I righted my chair and wheeled it back over to the desk.
“Devin, are you done talking to Kara? Could we talk for a little bit?” he asked. I nodded and said good-bye to Kara.
“You'll see!” Kara told me encouragingly before she signed off. “Nothing but good luck from now on!”
“Let's head outside,” said my dad. “It's a nice night.”
We went downstairs, and Dad flipped on the backyard light. It was almost fully dark. He jogged up to a soccer ball on the grass and passed it to me.
“So what's this about bad luck?” he asked with a frown on his face. “Is everything okay?”
“Not really,” I admitted. “I made that bad pass yesterday, and today you missed it, but I made a really bad play. And it's not just soccer. Everything's been going wrong since the earthquake. I can't sleep, and I think I failed a test, for the first time in my life!”
I started dribbling the ball around the yard. It felt good to be moving instead of sitting around worrying.
“So this all started with the earthquake.” Dad stroked his chin thoughtfully. “I wish you had told me or your mother how upset you were about the earthquake. You didn't say anything.”
“I guess that's because everyone else was acting like it was no big deal,” I said, coming to a stop in front of him. “Even Maisie didn't seem bothered by it, and she's younger than me.”
“It's a scary thing. It threw me, too,” he said.
“
You
were scared?” I asked incredulously. I couldn't believe it.
He nodded. “Sure. The earth moved! That's not something I'm used to happening. But then I reminded myself of all the safety plans we have in place as a family. That makes me feel better. And I also thought about how common earthquakes are. Minor ones happen thousands of times every day. Major ones are rare.”
“They happen thousands of times every day?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yes, and most of the time you can't even feel them,” he said. “So would it help if we went over our earthquake readiness plan and did a few more drills as a family?”
I nodded. “Yeah, I would like that, Dad.”
Dad smiled. “We'll have a family earthquake night when we can make sure we are totally prepared for another quake. We can even make it into a party.”
I smiled. Leave it to my dad to make earthquakes fun!
“You know, Devin,” he said, “part of the reason why the earthquake was so scary for me is because I like to be in control. I like planning out our dinners and knowing what I'm going to be doing at work each day and being prepared so I'm ready for it. There is no controlling an earthquake, only our response to it. I think you're a lot like me. From the soccer field to your homework, you're always in control. The earthquake has shaken that up for you. But once you feel balanced again, you'll feel a lot better. What do you think?”
Have I mentioned how much I love my dad? I gave him a hug.
“One last thing, Devin,” he said. “I know you were upset
about the soccer game today. I'm sorry I wasn't there for all of it. I hope you know how much it means to me to be at your games. I'll always do everything in my power to be there, cheering you on.”
“It just felt weird not having you guys there the entire time,” I said. “But after it was all over with, I'm glad you didn't see me play. I was terrible!”
“You'll get them next time, Devin,” he encouraged me. “Everyone has a bad game every now and then. Even the most famous soccer players in the world.”
I knew Dad was trying to help. But that was the same thing he always told me when I had a bad game, and right now it wasn't making me feel any better.
“It wasn't just one bad game; it was two,” I reminded him. “Two in a row.”
And I think I've lost my soccer mojo and that maybe I shouldn't even be playing anymore,
I wanted to add, but I stopped myself. Kara was rightâI
did
love soccer. Maybe this was just a slump.
“Learn from your experience and move on, Devin,” Dad told me. “That's all you can do.”
I knew Dad meant well, but his lecture was just making me feel sad. So I decided to turn it around.
“That's not
all
I can do,” I said, and then I started hopping around in a circle on one foot, and Dad laughed. He started hopping around on one foot with me.
Maisie ran out into the yard. “What are you guys doing?”
“We're getting rid of bad luck!” I told her.
Maisie looked thoughtful. “I don't have any bad luck. Can I do it anyway?”
“Of course!” Dad called out.
Maisie started hopping along with us. “I'm getting dizzy!”
Soon we were all cracking up, and then we had a hopping race across the yard. (Dad won, but I think that was because he had the longest legs.)
Maybe Kara's hopping chant worked, and maybe it didn't. But it definitely made me forget about my bad luck for a little while.
I wished Kara's chant had helped me get a good sleep that night, but it didn't. I fell asleep right away, but during the night I dreamed about the earthquake again. This time soccer balls started flying at me from everywhere as the floor shook beneath my feet.
I woke up with a start and looked at my clockâ1:16. I closed my eyes and tried to go back to sleep, but my heart was still pounding from the dream, and I couldn't. I kept opening my eyes and looking at the clock. 1:33. 2:07. 2:59. 3:12 . . . When I finally did fall asleep, it felt like my alarm went off just seconds later.
“Did you floss this morning, Devin?” Maisie asked me cheerfully as she dug into her bowl of cereal.
“No,” I grumbled, and grabbed a protein bar off the counter.
“Devin, you look so tired!” Mom said. “Have you been staying up past your bedtime?”
“No,” I said. “Just a bad dream.” And then I yawned.
This was the second night in a row when I hadn't slept well. Which explained what happened next, but it didn't make me feel any better about it.
My first period class was algebra with Mrs. Johnson. I was pretty good at math, so when I'd first come to Kentville, I'd gotten placed in algebra with mostly eighth graders, even though I was only in seventh grade. At first it was awkward, but then I realized that Cody, who's also in seventh grade, was in my class too. And so was Grace, my co-captain on the Kicks.
When I got to class that Monday morning, I felt like I couldn't keep my eyes openâand I didn't. One minute I was listening to Mrs. Johnson talk about polynomials and exponents, and then the next moment I heard her saying, very loudly, “Devin! Head up from your desk, please!”
I started awake and heard some kids laughing.
Oh no,
I thought, mortified. I had fallen asleep in class!
Cody looked at me, shaking his head and smiling. I wanted to dive under the desk! Thankfully, Mrs. Johnson didn't make a big deal out of it and kept talking.
There was no chance of me falling asleep in class after that, because I was so freaked out by what had happened that my adrenaline was pumping and my right foot was
tapping on the floor. When the bell rang, Mrs. Johnson stopped me on the way out.
“Are you feeling well, Devin?” she asked.
“Fine,” I replied. “Just didn't get much sleep last night. Sorry about that.”
She shook her head. “You kids, up all night texting your friends.”
That wasn't the reason, but I didn't bother to explain. I just raced for my next class and promised myself I wouldn't fall asleep again. Luckily, I was with seventh graders for the rest of my classes, so nobody knew what had happenedâor so I thought.
I was entering the cafeteria when Steven walked up to me. We hadn't really talked in a few days, because he'd been walking Hailey to English class ever since her first day. So I was glad to see him.
“Hey, Devin,” he said. “Heard you had a nice nap in Mrs. Johnson's class.”
A couple of boys behind him heard and laughed. I knew he wasn't being mean, just teasing me a little. But it hit me the wrong way. My eyes started welling up with tears.
Steven noticed. “Don't stress about it,” he said quickly. “Her voice could put anybody to sleep.”
“Thanks,” I said, and then I hurried away. Talk about mortifying! First falling asleep in class, and now practically crying in front of Steven! What was wrong with me?
I sat down at the table next to Jessi, put down my lunch
bagâand then I started to cry for real just as Zoe, Emma, and Frida walked up.
“Oh my gosh, Devin, what's wrong?” Emma asked, sitting down next to me.
“Nothing,” I said. “Or maybe everything. I don't know.”
“Is it the soccer thing?” Jessi asked.
“It's that, and so much more,” I said, and then everything came spilling out of meâmy three cavities, not sleeping, losing my soccer mojo, and not being sure why Steven wasn't talking to me so much anymore.
“And then not only did I fall asleep in class, but when Steven asked me about it, I practically started sobbing all over him!” I said. “I'm a mess!”
“Poor Devin!” Emma cried, reaching over to hug me.
“Group hug!” Zoe yelled, and everyone jumped up and gathered around, crushing me.
“All right! Calm down! We're in the middle of the cafeteria!” I said, giggling, as the hug broke up and everyone sat down.
“Dev, I'm so sorry,” Jessi said. “You're always so confident. Like, more confident than any of us. I had no idea you were feeling this way.”
“It's because Devin keeps her feelings locked inside,” Frida said, putting her hand in front of her face. “Her confidence is a mask.”
I groaned. “Really, Frida?”
“I don't think it's a mask,” Zoe said. “Devin, you are
really confident. It's just that now your confidence is shaken. So as your friends, we need to help you get it back.”
“Yeah, we'll be the Devin Confidence Squad!” Emma said, high-fiving Zoe.
I laughed. “So how, exactly, will you help me get my confidence back?”
“I don't know!” said Emma cheerfully. “But we'll figure it out!”
“Well, we can start by sticking together,” Zoe said. “Since we don't have soccer practice today, I'll come help you guys with Maisie's team practice.”
“Me too,” said Jessi quickly.
I thought about that. “Well, I was kind of thinking of having a Maisie-free day, but since you guys are all going to be there . . .”
“That's the spirit!” Emma cheered.
She held up her water bottle, and we all lifted up our beverages and touched them together. I might have lost confidence about a lot of things, but I was confident in one thing: I had the best friends a person could ever want.