Shadowed Instincts (7 page)

“Sundays are a day for rest and leisure.”

Melanie heard Darren’s voice from the hallway as she tried
to get up the nerve to enter the dining room for breakfast. She had made her
peace with Declan, but facing his parents and the rest of the pack after that
embarrassing conversation at dinner the night before was causing her nerves to
jump.

“Are you going to stand out there all day?” Darren’s boomed
out into the hallway and Melanie jumped.

She turned the corner and looked at her father
incredulously. “How did you…”

“Shifter hearing, sweetheart. Mine’s better than most.”

Melanie shuffled into the room and over to the side where a
buffet table was set up with all types of breakfast foods. Melanie chose
scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, and toast with grape jelly. After loading up
her plate she walked over to the head table and sat down in the same chair she
had used the night before, next to Jeremy, who was already half finished with
his breakfast. He and Darren were the only two there.

She looked around at all the empty chairs and glanced at
Darren with the question in her eyes. “I was just telling the boy here that we
don’t work or train on Sundays. Everyone sleeps in, so we’re the first ones
here for breakfast. You two are free to explore as you want today. After you
finish that mountain of food, that is,” Darren said with a grin.

Melanie blushed. “Sorry, I, uh… I’m just really hungry this
morning. I have no idea why.”

“I’m just teasing you, darlin’. Cynanthropes need extra
calories for all the energy we expend when we shift. Your hunger is just your
body’s way of telling you that your first change is nearing. Once it happens,
you’ll eat like this most of the time.”

“I never noticed Jeremy eating a lot of food,” Melanie said,
looking over at him.

“Well, I was trying to hide what I am from everyone. If
people saw how much food I actually eat and I remain this toned and muscular,
they’d start to wonder about my metabolism. I always keep trail mix and protein
shakes in my backpack and sneak it during classes.”

“Huh,” Melanie said, lost in thought. She shook her head to
clear it and said, “Well, I’ll scarf this down and we can go. What do you want
to do today?” Without giving him a chance to answer, she looked back at Darren,
“What would you suggest?”

“Well, let’s see. You could explore the grounds. There are
several hiking trails in the woods, if that’s your thing. The pond down at the
edge of forest is a great swimming hole. You could head over to Danville and
check it out. There are shops and diners, even a movie theater.”

“Oh, going to a movie sounds wonderful.” She looked at
Jeremy. “What do you think?”

“It sounds good to me, but how are we going to get there?”

“I’ll drive you. It sounds fun.”

All three of them turned to the doorway to see Declan
saunter in and head for the buffet table. Melanie looked at Jeremy with wide
eyes and shook her head in confusion.

“What do you think?” she mouthed at him. He shook his head
harshly, so she said aloud, “That’s okay Declan, I know you probably have
things you want to do today.”

Declan turned and walked to their table, taking the seat
directly on her right again. She looked pointedly at the six other empty seats,
but Declan just grinned. Melanie looked back down at her plate and resumed
eating, not wanting to see Jeremy’s reaction to Declan’s antics.

“No problem at all,” Declan said around a mouthful of
cereal. “I kept my day free of plans in case you wanted a tour guide. You
and
Jeremy, I mean.”

Melanie looked up at Jeremy to see a frown marring his
forehead. He smoothed out his expression and said, “Maybe we should just hang
out here and explore. We should learn our way around the house and grounds.”

“Okay, sounds good,” Melanie said, giving him a tentative
smile.

“Great,” interjected Declan. “I’ll be more than happy to
show you guys around.”

“Great,” Jeremy said sarcastically.

“Yeah, great,” Melanie added.
This is going to be
interesting,
she thought.

*~*~*

“Here’s the entertainment room,” Declan announced in his
best tour guide voice.

Melanie and Jeremy walked into the room and stared around
with their mouths hanging open. The room was huge. It was empty at the moment,
but Melanie imagined it could hold half the pack comfortably.

On the wall to the left, a giant television was mounted
above a fireplace.  In front of it was the largest sectional sofa that Melanie
had ever seen. It looked like it could hold twenty people. The fireplace had a
huge hearth surrounded by a flagstone mantle.

Melanie gazed around as they slowly walked further into the
room. The wall opposite the T. V. was made entirely of glass and had the same
view as her bedroom. She could see the lawn and the pond, with the forest
framing the yard on all sides.

“The sun sets in this direction, so there are motorized shades
that can be lowered to block the windows in the late afternoon,” Declan said as
he pointed to the remote control hanging on the wall by the door.

“Cool,” Melanie said, inching away from him and toward
Jeremy in what she hoped was an inconspicuous manner.

Declan huffed and shook his head. She wasn’t fooling
anybody. She shrugged and joined Jeremy in the center of the room. She gawked
at everything with the same awestruck look that Jeremy had on his face.

The room had everything. On the far wall opposite the door,
there was a bar with barstools. Melanie saw draft beer taps on one end and a
soda machine on the other. Behind it was a popcorn machine and various other
small appliances to make snacks.

Scattered throughout the room was a pool table, a foosball
table, two pinball machines, darts, and air hockey. There were arm chairs strategically
placed for extra seating and a juke box in one corner.

“Wow,” Melanie whispered.

“I know, right?” Declan said, having silently walked up
beside her. “This place is awesome. If you still want to watch a movie, we
could always watch one here,” he added, holding out his hand toward the giant
couch.

“That’s okay,” Jeremy said brusquely. “We want to finish
looking around, but don’t feel obligated to join us. We’ll be okay on our own.”

“I wouldn’t even consider deserting you now,” Declan said
with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “I have so much more to show you.” He
looked into Melanie’s eyes with those words, seeming to convey extra meaning. “Come
along.”

He grabbed Melanie’s hand and drew her toward the door. She
looked helplessly at Jeremy and saw him glaring at the back of Declan’s head. With
a low growl and a deep frown etched on his face, he trailed behind them.

Melanie was on pins and needles the rest of the morning. She
wasn’t sure how much more testosterone she could take. The tension between
Jeremy and Declan was palpable and she was waiting for it to explode like a
powder keg at any moment.

Declan insisted on showing them everything. They toured the rest
of the house, which included a library, her father’s office and multiple
bedrooms and bathrooms in addition to the other rooms she’d already seen. The
kitchen was decked out like a fancy restaurant. It had two of everything- two
stovetops, two ovens, two microwaves, and even two sinks.

After their tour of the house, he showed them the grounds.
She’d already seen the backyard from the windows, but there were so many
details she’d missed. Seeing everything up close filled her eyes with wonder.

The pond was beautiful, with colorful fish that could be see
darting through the clear water. Mama ducks looked after their ducklings on the
shallow banks and Melanie could hear bullfrogs croaking from the weeds around
the west edge.

Declan showed them the beginnings of the trails that led
through the woods, as well as the wider, flat bicycle paths. They spotted a
deer and her fawn meandering not far from the tree line. Melanie’s gasp of
surprise startled them and they leapt out of site.

“I’m kind of surprised to see all this wildlife around here.
Aren’t they scared of the dogs?”

Declan gave her a sweet smile that made her much more
uncomfortable than his usual smirk. She quickly turned her back to him and
stared into the trees. “We have lived among these creatures for over a hundred
years. They have learned that we are peaceful and won’t hurt them. It’s our
human form that scares them, not the dog.”

Suddenly, Melanie realized how close he was. Without her
noticing, he had edged up to her and she could feel his breath on the back of
her neck as he spoke. She shivered and her eyes shot to Jeremy. He was standing
a few feet away, eyes trained on the woods, a muscle in his jaw ticking as he
ground his teeth.

Melanie quickly moved away from Declan to stand beside
Jeremy, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it lightly. He squeezed back, but
didn’t take his eyes off the woods. She could feel the tension radiating off of
him. Her instincts told her to do something before it escalated.

“Thanks for the tour, Declan, but I think we can take it
from here.”

“But I wanted to-”

“No, thanks,” she interrupted firmly. “I want to spend some
time alone with Jeremy, if you don’t mind.”

Declan’s lips tightened and his eyes narrowed, but he nodded
and turned. Melanie watched him stalk up the hill with stiff, angry movements.

“What’s his problem?” Melanie wondered aloud as he slammed
into the house.

“Seriously?” Jeremy shouted, dropping her hand. “I told you
he wants you. He was flirting with you all morning and you just let him!”

“Wait, what? Are you mad at
me?”

“Yes! No! I don’t know!”

Melanie felt the stirrings of anger in her belly and she
fought to control it. She knew her impending change caused her to have extreme
reactions, but Jeremy didn’t have that excuse.

“Okay,” she said in a calm, even tone. “You need to calm
down and think about what you’re saying. I didn’t do anything wrong. Up until
just a few moments ago, I didn’t notice anything inappropriate from Declan. And
as soon as I did, I sent him away. Why, pray tell, are you mad at me?”

All the steam went out of Jeremy and his shoulders slumped.
“I don’t know, Mel. Whenever I’m around that guy, I can’t think straight. I
feel tense and angry and destructive. I can’t explain it.” He moved toward her and
lightly gripped her upper arms. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I didn’t mean it, I
swear. Forgive me?”

Melanie wrapped her arms around his waist and pulled him
close. “Of course I do,” she mumbled into his chest, trying to push away her
misgivings.

*~*~*

They got some lunch and spent the rest of the afternoon in
the entertainment room, curled up on the giant couch watching movies. For the
first hour, Melanie was a nervous wreck, chewing her fingernails down to the
quick. If Declan found out what they were doing and invited himself to join
them on the couch, things would go south quickly.

Jeremy grabbed her hand and held it, throwing his other arm
over her shoulder and pulling her close. She relaxed into his embrace and finally
started to calm down. Enveloped in his warmth, she felt safe and secure, like
nothing could touch them.

Flicking off the T. V., Jeremy stood up and stretched his
arms over his head with a yawn. His shirt rode up with the movement, baring a strip
of skin from above his navel to his low-slung jeans. Melanie licked her lips
without realizing it.

“Hey, I’m a real person, you know,” he said.

Melanie’s eyes jerked up and a blush stained her cheeks as
she stuttered, “Wh-what?”

Jeremy chuckled and grabbed her hand, pulling her up next to
him. “You were checking me out like I was a juicy steak or something.”

“What!” she exclaimed innocently. “I most certainly was
not!”

“Uh-huh. Yes you were,” he teased.

Melanie arched an eyebrow and lifted the hem of his shirt.
She ran her palm over his abdomen and kissed his neck. Jeremy’s arms snaked
around her and he squeezed her butt as she licked her way up to his ear.

“Okay, you got me,” she whispered into it. “I may have been
checking you out…a little bit.”

Her hand moved down and fiddled with the button of his jeans
and Jeremy jumped back quickly. Melanie stood where she was, staring at him in
dumbfounded silence. Her hands dropped to her sides and she closed them into
tight fists.

Jeremy raked a hand through his hair and stared at the
ceiling, his breath heaving. “Mel, I’m sorry. We can’t…”

He trailed off with another deep breath. Melanie’s eyes
started to fill with tears as the weight of his rejection hit her. She didn’t
want him to see her cry, so she did the only thing she could in that situation.
She turned and fled.

Melanie slammed her door shut and threw herself onto her
bed, sobbing. Deep down she knew she was being unreasonable. They were, after
all, in a public space where anyone could have walked in at any moment. She got
her tears under control and rolled onto her back, picking up her phone from the
bedside table.

“
Hey, Tara. U busy?”

“Hey! Was just about 2 text U! What’s up? How is
everything?”

“The place is nice. My room is awesome. Jeremy’s acting
weird though.”

“???”

“I don’t think he wants me.”

“What?!? What do U mean? He just followed U 2 KY, for
crying out loud.”

“No. I mean he doesn’t want to, U know…”

“Sex?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t be stupid. Of course he wants U. I’ve seen the
look in that boy’s eyes. Plus, he can’t keep his hands off of U most of the
time.”

“Then why does he keep stopping me?”

“What, now? Melanie Johnson! Have U been trying 2 get him
in the sack?”

“Shut up.”

“LOL!”

“Seriously, if he really loves me and wants me, then why
does he keep pulling away?”

“I think U just answered your own question. He loves U.
If he didn’t, he’d just take what he wants.”

“What about what I want? I’ve tried so many times…”

“I knew it! U R such a slut!”

“OMG, Tara. Shut. Up.”

“Love U.”

“ILY2, butthole.”

Melanie threw her phone down on the bed and stared at the
ceiling. She knew Tara was probably right. Jeremy did love her and that’s why
he didn’t want to take things too far, too fast. All of her emotions seemed to
be flying out of control and lust was one of them. Anger was another.

She knew she needed to think long and hard about her
impulses and what they really meant. She loved Jeremy, there was no doubt about
that. Whenever she was near him, her body felt magnetized, like she needed to
get as close to him as possible.

Am I really ready for everything?
she questioned
silently.

She shook her head and groaned. It was all so confusing. She
wasn’t sure if it was her feelings for Jeremy or the emotional upheaval of her
impending change. She did know one thing for sure, though.

I need to get myself under control,
she thought.
I’m
going to end up alienating Jeremy and I’m the only one he’s got here.

She picked up her phone and sent another text.

“
Hey, sorry about earlier.”

“Mel, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt U.”

“I know. I understand. It’s just hard to control my
reactions right now.”

“Mel, I get it. I went through this not too long ago. I
remember what it feels like.”

“See U at dinner?”

“I’ll save U a seat.”

“Thanks, Jeremy. ILY.”

“ILY2.”

*~*~*

When Melanie walked into the dining room, she noticed two
things: Only her family, Jeremy and the Browns were present, and Jeremy had
saved her a seat between himself and her mother. A small smile graced her lips
when she realized he had done that on purpose. She would have no uncomfortable
elbow brushes with Declan while she ate tonight.

She filled her plate at the buffet and sat down, not making
eye contact with Jeremy. She was embarrassed by her outburst earlier and felt
unsure of herself. She tried to take Tara’s observations to heart, but that
insecure part of her brain wouldn’t let up.

Jeremy tentatively touched her leg under the table and
leaned in close to whisper, “Hey, I’m really sorry.”

Melanie looked up from her plate and her eyes landed across the
table on Declan, who was smiling at her.
Of course,
she thought,
he
heard that. He thinks…

Melanie narrowed her eyes at him, then plastered a smile on
her face as she turned to Jeremy. She placed her hand over his and squeezed,
then leaned in so that her lips touched his ear when she spoke.

“Don’t apologize,” she whispered. “You have nothing to be
sorry for. I love you.”

She kissed his cheek, then looked back at Declan. He had an
angry look on his face for a split second before he wiped it clean and replaced
it with a sly grin. He turned and started talking to Elaine and Darren about
their plans for the week ahead, as if she was forgotten. Melanie heaved a sigh
of relief.

“So, Melanie,” Willow said. “If it’s okay with you, I’d like
to meet up with you in the morning. I’ll let you pick my brain, so to speak,
about living as a cynanthrope, particularly as a female. I can give you a
perspective that your dad can’t.” She looked at Darren as she said that last
part and shot him an affectionate smirk.

Melanie perked up. “Really? That would be great, Willow.
Thank you so much!”

“My pleasure, sweetie. What do you say, about nine tomorrow
morning?”

“Nine sounds perfect.”

“Okay, it’s a date. I’ll meet you in the library.”

Melanie nodded her head in agreement and the conversation
turned to other topics. She was starting to relax and actually enjoy the
company. They were a lively bunch, making jokes and taking jabs at each other.
Even her mom joined in a few times.

The only one silent was Jeremy. He was staring at his plate,
pushing his food around with his fork when Melanie bumped her knee against his.
When he looked over at her, she nodded her head in question, silently asking
what was wrong. He shrugged and looked back down at his plate, shaking his
head.

Melanie had an idea what the problem was, so she asked, “Hey
Darr- uh, I mean, Dad. Do you think you’ll have some time to talk to Jeremy
tomorrow morning? He has a lot of questions and I think you’d be the best
person to help him out.”

Darren’s face split into a huge grin when he heard the word
“dad.” That was the first time she had called him that when speaking to him.
“Of course. Jeremy, would you like to come to my office at nine? I can set
aside a few hours.”

“Yes, sir.”

“It’s settled, then. While Melanie is meeting with Willow,
you’ll meet with me and everyone will get the answers they are looking for.”

Jeremy’s face lit up and he shot a look of gratitude at
Melanie. She smiled at him and bumped his knee with hers again. She knew
everything between them would be just fine.