Shadow of Death: Book Two of the Chosen Chronicles (15 page)

With a sigh, Bridget released their grip.
“
Notus said you were still having nightmares. He didn
’
t say how bad they were.
”

The statement surprised him. The fact that the three of them were talking about him behind his back rankled. He never wanted to be the centre of anyone
’
s attention, except that of Jeanie
’
s, but that would never ever happen again. He grimaced at the thought.

Picking wounds he would not let heal; the Angel stood and strode to the other side of the living room in an attempt to find solitude. Bridget
’
s gaze lingered on him for a moment before she rose to her feet, a determined air surrounding her. He closed his eyes knowing what would be next. It was a dance they had done for decades. It was one of the reasons why he tried to stay away from his friends yet inextricably what pulled him closer.

He sighed at the touch of her hand on his crossed arms, but he did not open his eyes. He could not bear to see the look on her beautiful face.

“
You can
’
t keep running, Gwyn.
”
Bridget gazed up at the Angel. His beautiful face was pinched with pain.

It was an old argument and his shoulders slumped.
“
What do you want me to do?
”

“
I, no, you, need to let go of Jeanie,
”
Bridget said softly. It was something she had tried to tell him before, but he would    always run away, finding excuses to flee the conversation by the time it got to this point. This time she pulled no punches and went straight for the jugular. Her friend needed it whether he realized it or not.
“
You need to let go of your guilt. You need to move on with your life.
”

He gasped at the sudden attack, his eyes popping open to look down at his Mistress in horror.  He could not
–
no, he would not
–
ever let Jeanie
’
s memory float to the past and nor would he ever forgive himself for getting her killed. His life had stopped that night; giving birth to an existence where he delved so deep into the Angel of Death that if Notus had not been with him he would have truly lost himself and his soul.

He shook his head.
“
It
’
s not possible.
”

“
Only because you don
’
t want to let go,
”
stated Bridget. She huffed her exasperation. Had anyone told her that the Angel could be like this she would never have allowed Fernando to let the Angel into her home that night so long ago.

He frowned at her irritation. He was not expecting that and was immediately sorry.

“
Would you just stop that?
”
snapped Bridget.
“
No matter how I feel about how you
’
re acting I still care about you. Fernando still cares about you in his own bizarre way. Hell, Notus loves you and aches that he can do nothing to ease your soul.
”

The admission punched him hard in the gut forcing a grunt. Bridget
’
s battering against his carefully crafted walls forced him to turn away. He knew how they felt about them. How could he not? If not for the arduous process of learning to shield his new abilities he would know all the time. He did not need to be told. He also knew the secret emotions they held for him, not all of it nice. Awe. Jealousy. Lust. Fear. Only in regards to Notus was Bridget right. Oh sure the Master and Mistress of Britain cared about him, but those feelings were entangled with ones he had grown accustomed to through the ages with everyone he knew
–
except Jeanie.

Sitting back down on the couch he raked his hands through his hair, pushing the long white locks from his face. Settling his hands to drape on his knees he caught Bridget
’
s fuming gaze with his own.

The pain flowing from the Angel was tangible, but Bridget would not let it stop her from doing what needed to be done. The Angel had eradicated the Vampire threat in Europe after over a century of slaughter. It did not take a genius to figure out that he had used that quest as a distraction from healing the wounds of his heart. Now that the fighting was over he was affecting the Chosen around him with his melancholy no matter how infrequent he interacted with others of their kind. This time she would not let him run.

“
Did you know that Juliette agreed to be Chosen because she loves you?
”

The admission stunned him to the quick. He knew the girl cared about him, but she would always run from the room when he went over to the House. He also knew that her love was entangled with the myth that was the Angel. Juliette did not know him and he grimaced at the thought that she had agreed to be Chosen because of her puppy love. It was one he could not ever return.
And thus the Angel causes more suffering,
he thought.

He did not realize he was shaking his head in denial until Bridget stood before him, her hand cupping his chin, halting the motion.

Bridget did something very few could do; she gazed directly into the beautiful ruby eyes of the Angel and did not balk. She did not need to see the sadness there. His emotions rolled like thunder into her, through her touch, causing her to catch her breath. She immediately squashed it, but her heart ached to comfort him, as she always did when she saw him this way, in the only way she knew how. Leaning ever so slightly forward and down, Bridget captured the Angel
’
s lips with her own.

He had felt her need to help him, but when her lips met his, the Angel
’
s eyes widened in surprise before closing at the passion she sent towards him. He had always found Bridget beautiful and kind hearted, but he never considered her in this way. They were friends, but her desire flowed into him and, surprisingly, he found himself responding.

Her lips were soft, made for kissing, and he felt them part as she pressed firmer. It had been so long since he was kissed this way; to be desired and wanted for who he really was. Bridget
’
s tongue caressed his and he felt his arms go around her petite frame, the sheet falling from her body to leave her gloriously   naked between his knees. Her cool white flesh pressed against him with only his cotton shirt and trousers between them. The thought made him harden, as did her tongue to trail down the side of his neck.

He moaned as her tongue darted between succulent lips to play with his pale skin. He felt her hands roam down his chest and then the angle of the kiss changed. Bridget was now on her knees before him, fumbling with the button of his trousers. His breath caught as the pressure she applied in her attempt to undo the button brushed against him, causing his hardness to leap in anticipation.

A part of him knew he should stop this, but her desire to consume him had breached a hole in his wall he did not know he still had. It was his need to be needed, loved and cared for that betrayed him. He found her mouth as she undid the button and began to work on the zipper. His hand enclosed around her small breast, the nipple hardening instantly as his thumb brushed against it.

A flood of anger crashed down on him, slicing his head as if hit with a pickaxe. It was all he could do to remain vertical as he grabbed Bridget and set her back from him, ignoring her shocked expression. Pinching the bridge of his nose he could feel Fernando
’
s jealousy and hurt under the anger. It was then he realized what he had almost done.

“
Go,
”
he ordered Bridget as his guilt rose to meet Fernando
’
s feelings.

Everything had been going so well. Better, in fact, as she had   always wanted to bed the Angel, even from the first time she had met him in her parlour all those decades ago. She had felt his need and desire match hers. Confused at the sudden turn around, she picked up the fallen sheet and hastily wrapped it around her.
“
What
’
s wrong?
”

His breath caught and he shook his head, sending white locks floating.
“
Fernando.
”

Realization dawned in Bridget
’
s blue eyes. Fernando was now closed to her since the end of the Vampire threat. It had been the agreement they had originally made so as to make sure each was safe or to offer help if needed, but it was clear that it was not only she who was distinctly aware of the Angel
’
s feelings.

“
Fernando won
’
t–” She began to explain that even through her relationship with the Noble, she still worked at her profession and he did not mind. It was her best way to feed herself.  She did not understand why it would matter now.

“
He does,
”
stated the Angel, matter-of-factly.
“
And I…” His voice trailed off as he broke eye contact to stare at the floor beyond Bridget. Guilt tightened his throat.
“
I don
’
t want to hurt my friends. I
’
ve hurt enough people.
”

He came to his feet, causing Bridget to stumble back, and walked to the other side of the room, his back to her.
“
Go back to Fernando, Bridget. He loves you. I never want to be the cause of any harm between the two of you.
”

Bridget wanted to touch him, to let him know he could never do that to her, but she knew that the Angel was right about Fernando.
She lowered the hand she had inadvertently outstretched towards the Angel and turned to go back up to the Angel
’
s bedroom where Fernando waited.

She halted before she took the first step.
“
No matter what happens, Gwyn, we still love and care for you.
”

He pinched his eyes closed and hugged himself as he heard her ascend the stairs. A door opened and then closed, releasing a wash of relief that he matched with his own.

Alone, he walked over to the window and opened the drape. True dawn had occurred hours ago, but pregnant clouds kept the world in darkness, leaving a thick blanket of beauty in its wake. Staring at the intricate patterns of frost on the window he took a deep shuddering breath as he contemplated what would happen when the clouds separated.

Toronto, Canada
–
April 3rd

“W
ell that went better than I expected.
”
Notus hoisted the brown leather valise to hang by its strap over his shoulder as he settled the matching suitcase onto the floor next to him. Pressing the button, he extended the hidden handle that allowed for the case to easily be guided along the ground. The weight of the luggage would be of no hindrance to the ancient immortal but even Chosen had only two hands.