Sex Between, The (11 page)

There was fear in Maggie's eyes. Fear, and other things that Lee could not quite define. Suddenly she knew that something had gone all wrong. That Maggie would be leaving her even before she had expected. "Is it Kate?" Lee said gently.

Maggie sighed. "In a way," she said. "Daddy called tonight and said we have to be at Ravensway tomorrow afternoon. Something about papers and a financial settlement. I don't really know what she wants. But anyhow, Pieter and Trudel will be there too. Daddy says Kate wants me to move in tomorrow so I can begin to get used to the idea. But from the way Daddy said it, I have an idea that Pieter must have said something to Kate about... well, you know, Lee."

Lee heard her cup rattle in its saucer. Very carefully, she leaned across to the table and set it down.

"I'm so sorry, Lee," Maggie whispered.

"The dumb son of a bitch," Lee said incredulously. "What in the hell did he think he could gain by doing that?"

"Trudel," Maggie said simply. Lee stared at her.

Maggie shrugged. "Daddy says Kate turned you down about Trudel. Supposedly because she thinks Trudel isn't bright enough for the job. But I think it must have been because...
"

"That figures,” Lee interrupted bitterly. She thought for a moment, then said, "But I'm not so sure. There must be something else Pieter wants."

"What?"

Something clicked over in the back of Lee's mind, but not quite loudly enough to catch her attention. She shook her head. "Damned if I know," she admitted. "Did you say you'd move out there tomorrow?"

"Did I have a choice?"

Maggie looked very tired, worn down by her nerves to a fine edge of misery. Anxiously, Lee searched her face, looking for some clue, some little sign...

Maggie set down her cup and leaned back on the bed. "I guess that's it," she said numbly.

"You guess what's what?" Lee said.

Maggie sighed. "It seemed so far away this morning. Now, it seems like... like there's no time at all."

In her heart, Lee smiled. "No time for what?" she prodded gently.

Maggie's hand reached out to the teddy bear propped against the pillows and pulled it close. "No time to be happy," she said. "Tomorrow I'll be all signed away and paid for. I feel like an antique put up for auction."

Lee laughed softly. "Baby," she said, "I only wish you were. I could have outbid Pieter any day."

She watched Maggie's eyes turn to look at her and she waited. It was out in the open now, where it should have been a long time ago. And it was Maggie's move. Maggie's choice, to welcome her or to send her away.

Maggie did neither. She merely smiled at the teddy bear and said, "Would you have?"

Lee didn't like the sound of it. Not one little bit. Something about Maggie's tone called Lee a couple of dirty names. She looked at the girl curiously, a little annoyed with herself and not quite knowing what to do.

"Well?" Maggie said.

"Well, you just ran me up a tree," Lee said edgily. "So either give me a ladder or saw off the limb, will you?

Maggie looked at her squarely. She was not smiling now. "Do you know something, Lee Van Tassel?" she said, her voice tight. "I'm in love with you. I think I must have been born in love with you."

Lee felt a little of the tension begin to ebb out of her spine. She leaned forward in her chair. Then she looked into Maggie's eyes and the tension edged back.

"I must have been out of my mind," Maggie said bitterly.

"Why?" Lee blurted. But in her heart she knew why. for she realized that Maggie could not possibly know how she felt. That she had never given Maggie any reason to understand it. For months she had done nothing but run around, done nothing but tell Maggie that she wanted to be free, that she would not be tied down. How could Maggie know that this had changed?

"Because you've never loved anything in your life," Maggie said. "You're afraid to love anything. You're afraid to trust anything. And it's Kate's fault and I hate her."

The blasphemy fell harsh on Lee's ears. She felt the blood leave her face, her arms, and plummet into her stomach. "What the hell are you talking about?" she said, her voice low and harsh. "Kate's got nothing to do with—"

"Oh, hasn't she?" Maggie interrupted. "I know what Kate's drummed into you since you were a baby, Lee. Don't ever depend on anybody for anything. Build your own empire with your own two hands... just like she built hers. Don't love anything because you’ll learn to need it and then you're lost. Be a self-made woman, Lee. Don't..."

Maggie's harsh, bitter words were not new to Lee's ears. She had said them to herself often, unconsciously mimicking the thesis by which Kate lived. Unconsciously accepting Kate's way as the right way. Until Maggie had begun to get under her skin, she had believed that Kate could do no wrong. And until this moment, she had never questioned Kate's authority.

"Stop it," Lee spat. "Stop it."

Maggie laughed mirthlessly. "Is it too much for you, Lee? Does it hurt, because it's true?"

Lee took a deep breath and held onto it. She could not tell Maggie... not even Maggie... the things she was thinking about Kate. About Kate making puppets of them all, pulling the strings that controlled their lives. She could not tell Maggie, because she had no answer. She could not fight Kate and possibly hope to win. Slowly, she exhaled and in her frustration, hit a fist against one knee.

"Well," Maggie said with satisfaction, "somewhere a light dawns in your thick skull."

Lee had had just about enough. Enough of Kate, enough of the whole damned family. What she had to say to Maggie had nothing to do with any of them. It was private, just for the two of them. And they had so little time...

"Would you like to know something, genius?" Lee said softly.

Maggie hugged the teddy bear in both arms. "What?" she said against its fur.

"You think you're so precious smart. Did it ever occur to you that you might be wrong for once in your life?"

"About you?" Maggie laughed. "I doubt it. You'd still rather buy me at an auction than fall in love with me."

"My God," Lee breathed, her cheeks stinging from the force of the verbal blow. She got up and came to stand beside the bed. "Is that really what you think?"

"Well, didn't you just say so yourself?" Maggie complained. "What's any different about that than sending orchids and chocolates to Helga?"

Lee sat down on the edge of the bed, but she made no move to touch the girl. "I apologize for that," she said quietly. "And you're quite right. I am used to buying women, in one way or another. But that's not what I meant about you, Maggie." She smiled ruefully. "It so happens I was making a pass at you. A clumsy one, obviously."

Maggie buried her face against the teddy bear's belly.

"But then," Lee said very gently, "I've never been in love before, Maggie. This whole business is new to me. So if I make a couple of mistakes..."

Slowly, as though afraid to face it, Maggie turned onto her back to look into Lee's eyes. She was silent for a long time. Then she said, "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes," Lee said seriously, "I really do. I came up here to tell you so. Then," she grinned, "I took a good look at you in those damned pajamas and I forgot to be a gentleman."

For a moment, Maggie's eyes were dark and troubled. Then, very gently, she laughed.

"You know something?" she murmured. "I wish you'd forgotten that a long time ago."

Lee reached out and took the teddy bear from Maggie's arms and tossed it toward a chair.

Maggie leaned away from the bed to meet her.

Almost savagely, Lee caught the girl and pulled her tight. Her mouth mashed down on Maggie's. Needing her. Needing her so very much...

Eagerly her hand moved beneath the pajama top, seeking the firm, full mound of breast. She heard Maggie suck in her breath.

"Be gentle, darling," Maggie whispered against her ear. "I've never..."

It wasn't good manners that motivated her to comply. Never in her life had a girl responded to her as Maggie did. She felt the girl trembling beneath her hands and she was gentle, knowing the fullness of Maggie's need. Teaching Maggie how, drawing from each of them every thread of desire. Taking the love, the passion Maggie had saved for her.

Maggie's lips were warm and moist against hers. Maggie's hands caressed her. Maggie's body surged to meet hers.

Maggie was everywhere and everything.

And still Lee was gentle.

And she was lost, wandering in the maze of desire. Unable to feel enough, to touch enough. Needing more hands, more lips to know Maggie. Mad with the need to take her, to possess her. Yet moving slowly, not wanting it to happen too soon. Needing to prolong this moment to last a lifetime.

Very gently she unbuttoned the pajamas and took them off. But slowly. Loving Maggie's body with her eyes as she had felt it with her hands. Touching the smooth, fragrant flesh with her lips. Kissing her. But slowly.

"I love you," Maggie murmured. Lee kissed her tenderly on the mouth. "Say it, Lee," Maggie whispered. "I've waited so long..."

"I love you," Lee said. "I think I've always loved you, Maggie." And she knew that it was so. That before Maggie, there had been nothing. And after Maggie was gone...

She put her cheek against the girl's belly and closed her eyes. Listening to the rhythm of Maggie's breathing, the beat of her heart, caressing her lightly. Wanting to be with her always, yet knowing she must let her go.

The beat of Maggie's heart told her that it was time. And still she lingered a moment, kissing her, a little afraid...

She went to the girl then. Quickly. Surely. Knowing that Maggie was hers and that Maggie would always be hers. Telling Maggie with her hands and with her lips that she knew this and that she loved her.

Maggie's fingers held her and told her that it was good.

Then Lee felt the fingers tighten against her skull and she felt the surge of desire tremble through Maggie's thighs. Her own body caught fire and she knew that she could not wait. Clinging to Maggie, she felt them hurdle together toward infinity. And together, still together, they knew love...

They lay silent for a long time. Not sated, not really wanting to be. But together in an hiatus of calm, enjoying each other now. Yet knowing that the moment could not last. Soon, too soon, it would be dawn and then afternoon. And too soon, Lee would be driving Maggie to Ravensway to be Pieter's bride.

Maggie sighed and turned her face against Lee's arm.

"I know," Lee murmured. "I was just thinking the same thing myself."

"But I'm glad," Maggie said softly. Lovingly her lips caressed Lee's shoulder, moved down the side of her arm. "Even if... if I never see you again, I'm glad."

Lee turned onto her side and took the girl into her arms. Even in the midst of their quiet, she could hear the wings of fate beating inexorably in her ears. "Don't be afraid," she whispered. "It'll be all right."

But the words echoed hollowly. And somewhere deep inside, Lee knew that she was crying.

CHAPTER TEN

Lee scrawled her name at the bottom of the letter, then pushed it across the desk to Maggie. "Is that the last one?"

Maggie picked up the letter and turned back toward her typing table. "That's it," she said over her shoulder. "Just let me make an envelope and we'll have some lunch."

Lee propped her feet on the corner of the desk and leaned back. From behind a screen of cigarette smoke, she watched Maggie sit down and roll an envelope into the machine. In the blue pajamas and a soft robe, Maggie looked baby-faced and sleepy. But she had insisted that they work this morning, to clear away the pile of miscellaneous junk cluttering Lee's desk. And Lee knew that had been the best thing for both of them.

Maggie folded the letter and slipped it into the envelope. Then she set it on top of a neat pile. "That makes an even dozen," she commented aloud.

"You know," Lee said lightly, "I'll miss you. You're the most efficient secretary I've ever had. I don't know where I'll find another one like you."

Maggie's eyes twinkled. "That's easy. Just find one who's in love with the boss."

Lee laughed and swung her feet to the floor. "That's a hell of a way to run a business," she said. She crossed to Maggie's chair in three strides. "Business is supposed to be a cold, impersonal thing."

"Yes," Maggie said, "but look at all the money you could save in salaries. Just move them in here with you and..."

"Uh-huh," Lee murmured. "But look at the time I could waste in..." Leaning forward, she grabbed Maggie by the shoulders and pulled her out of the chair.

Maggie's arms went around Lee's neck as Lee kissed her.

"You know, you're right," Lee said after a while. "There's something about the personal touch..."

Maggie laughed against her throat. "Just be glad it won't be Trudel. You couldn't even get your arms around her."

They were trying very hard, Lee knew. Both of them. Trying too hard to pretend it didn't hurt. But they dared not stop the little game. In three hours, they would be on their way to Kate. It would be over then, the pretending. There would be nothing left for either of them but the hurt they would no longer be able to hide. In just three hours...

"Lee, hold me," Maggie whispered.

And Lee knew that Maggie was thinking the same thing. They had not slept, yet both were vibrantly, almost violently alive. Feeding off their nerves, afraid to relax for even an instant.

She put her arms around the girl and put her face against the sleepy-smelling sweetness of her neck. They stood very still, very close—as though poised, waiting for the fatal plunge that would destroy them both.

Then she felt Maggie's body lift toward her. Her hands slid down to Maggie's behind and pulled her tight. Slowly they moved against each other, stirring up the glowing embers of their desire. Maggie's mouth opened against hers and Lee darted her tongue past the eager lips.

Suddenly, she could not stand it, the farce they were living. Suddenly, the tight-strung nerves snapped and the strength went out of her. She went down to her knees with her arms around Maggie's thighs. A sob stuck like a bone in her throat. She put her cheek against the girl and felt Maggie's fingers touch the back of her neck.