See Me (23 page)

Colin, on the other hand, continued to exude an easy confidence, and it was that, more than anything, which allowed her to regain her equilibrium.

“I’m not sure what to say,” she admitted.

“You don’t have to say anything. I didn’t say it because I wanted a response. I said it because I wanted to.”

She wrapped both hands around the stem of her glass. “May I ask you a question?” she asked shyly. “About something else?”

“Of course.”

“Why did you act like you didn’t know anything about salsa dancing?”

“When we talked about it, I didn’t. Lily spent the week giving me lessons. That’s what I was doing on Thursday and Friday nights.”

“You learned how to dance for me?”

“Yes.”

She turned away and took a sip of wine, trying to mask her amazement. “Thank you. And I guess I should thank Lily, too.”

He flashed a quick smile. “Would you mind if I refill my water glass? I’m still a bit thirsty.”

“Of course not.”

Colin stepped away and Maria shook her head, wondering when, or even if, she would cease being surprised by him.

Luis had never spoken to her like Colin just had. As she leaned over the railing, she suddenly found it hard to remember what she’d really seen in him. On the surface, he was attractive and intelligent, but underneath he’d been arrogant and vain. She’d often made excuses for his behavior, and if anyone questioned her feelings, she’d reacted defensively. Thinking back, she admitted that she’d desperately wanted his approval and not only did he sense that, but he frequently took advantage of it. It wasn’t a healthy relationship, she knew, and when she tried to imagine him behaving as Colin had – calling her, bringing flowers, learning to dance – she couldn’t. And despite all that, she’d loved Luis with an intensity she could still sometimes feel.

Earlier, as she and Colin had been dancing, she’d caught herself thinking that the night couldn’t possibly get any better. And then, all at once, it had. Listening to him express his feelings without fear or regret had left her speechless. She wondered whether she was capable of such a thing. Probably not, but then again, Colin wasn’t like most people. He accepted himself, faults and all, and forgave himself for the mistakes he’d made. More than that, he seemed to live in the moment without regard for either the past or the future.

The greatest revelation was how deeply Colin was able to experience his emotions, perhaps even more deeply than she did. Watching him over dinner and on the dance floor, and hearing his words just now, she knew that if he wasn’t in love with her yet, he was on the brink. Like her, he was willing to surrender to the inevitable, an idea that made her hands tremble. As Colin stepped back onto the balcony behind her, she took a long breath, savoring the wave of desire that flooded through her. He leaned over the railing next to her, and as their breaths fell into steady rhythm, she took another sip of wine, the warmth coursing down her throat into her stomach and limbs.

Studying his face in profile, she thought again about the way his external calm enveloped the coiled emotions within him, and she suddenly imagined the way Colin might look as he hovered naked above her, his lips gently brushing hers, as they gave themselves over to each other. Her stomach tightened and she felt her mouth curve into a faint smile.

“Did you mean what you said to me earlier?”

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he lowered his head before turning to face her.

“I meant every single word.”

Feeling a cascade of sensations in her body, she moved closer and kissed him gently on the lips. They were soft and warm, and pulling back, she saw in his expression something akin to hope. She kissed him a second time then and felt her skin begin to come alive as he slid his arms around her. He tugged softly, bringing their bodies together, and in that instant, she began to lose herself in him. She could feel the strength of his chest and arms surrounding her and the warm urgency of his tongue, and she knew with fierce certainty that she needed Colin, all of him. They continued to kiss on the balcony beneath a foggy, star-filled sky until she finally reached for his hand. Their fingers intertwined as he kissed the hollow of her neck, the sensation tantalizing and erotic. She shivered, enjoying the sensation before wordlessly leading him to the bedroom.

 

 

Moments after she woke the next morning, Maria felt the soft glare of the early-autumn sun, and the night came rushing back. She rolled over and saw Colin lying on his side, only half covered by the sheet, already awake and alert. “Good morning,” he whispered.

“Good morning,” she said. “How long have you been up?”

“About an hour.”

“Why didn’t you go back to sleep?”

“I wasn’t tired. And besides, I kind of enjoyed watching you.”

“That has the potential to sound very creepy, you know.”

“Okay.”

She smiled. “Well, since you were watching me, I hope I didn’t do anything embarrassing or make any strange noises.”

“You didn’t. You just lay there looking sexy as hell.”

“My hair is messy and I need to brush my teeth.”

“Right now?”

“Why? What did you have in mind?”

He reached toward her, using his finger to trace her collarbone, and after that, no words were necessary.

 

 

Later, they showered together and dressed. Maria dried her hair and put on makeup while Colin leaned against the bathroom counter beside her, nursing a cup of coffee.

“Are we going someplace?” he asked.

“Brunch. With my parents.”

“Sounds good. I’m going to need to change first, though. What time?”

“Eleven.”

“I take it that we won’t be riding together.”

“That’s probably not a good idea. It’s going to be hard enough to prepare them for your visit. Because this time, they’re going to ask a lot of questions.”

“Okay.”

Maria put down her mascara wand and took his hand. “Does that bother you? Or scare you?”

“No.”

“Well, it sure scares me,” she admitted, returning to her makeup. “The whole thing is terrifying, in fact.”

He took a sip of coffee. “What are you going to tell them about me?”

“Hopefully, as little as possible. Any details will just spur more questions that you should answer, not me.”

“What are you hoping for today?”

“For my mom to get through it without tears, and my father not to demand that you leave the house.”

“That’s not a very high bar.”

“Trust me,” she said. “It’s higher than you think.”

C
olin pulled up to Maria’s parents’ house just before eleven. He had no idea how the conversation with her parents had gone, and as he stepped out of the car, he figured there was no use in speculating, since he’d find out soon enough anyway.

Had Lily been around, he would have asked her what he should bring to a family brunch, but she and Evan were already at church when he got home, and in the end, it probably wouldn’t do much good anyway. Like everyone else, they were going to form their own opinions, and a basket of muffins wasn’t going to alter them.

Still, as he walked to the door, he hoped that Maria was all right. Earlier, on his way home, he’d thought about her virtually nonstop, one series of images giving way to the next, each more ravishing than the one before. That was a first for him,
she
was a first, and he took a deep breath, reminding himself that even though he wouldn’t shy away from any questions, his answers could be framed in a lot of different ways and still remain honest.

He knocked at the door and it swung open almost immediately, revealing Serena. He noticed again how much she resembled her older sister, though she seemed even more high-strung than usual, which probably wasn’t a good sign.

“Hey, Colin,” she said, stepping aside to let him in. “I saw you walking up. Come on in.”

“Thank you. How did your dinner go last night?”

“Awesome,” she answered. “But I should be the one asking you.”

“We had a good time.”

“I’m sure.” Serena winked. “Maria’s in the kitchen with Mom,” she said, closing the door behind him. “And I’m amazed you were able to get her to go dancing.”

“Why?”

“If you don’t know yet, I think you need to spend even more time with her,” she answered. “But here’s a word to the wise – I wouldn’t get too descriptive about last night, especially anything that might have happened after the dancing. It’s already a little tense around here. I have a hunch that my parents think you’re a terrorist.”

“Okay.”

“I might be exaggerating, but who really knows?” she babbled. “I didn’t get here until the three of them were finished talking, and my parents barely said hello to me. All I really know for sure is that my dad wasn’t smiling and my mom kept making the sign of the cross, despite how well last night’s dinner with the director of the foundation went… not that my little challenges matter right now. Anyway, I decided it was best if I just waited for you in the living room.”

By then, they’d reached the kitchen, where he saw Maria standing over a sizzling frying pan while her mom pulled a small baking pan from the oven. The air smelled of bacon and cinnamon.

“Colin’s here,” Serena called out.

Maria turned and he noticed she was wearing an apron. “Hi, Colin,” she said tightly. “You remember my mom, right?”

Carmen forced on a plastic smile, and though Colin might have been imagining it, she seemed paler than she’d been just a couple of days earlier. “Good morning, Mrs. Sanchez,” he said, figuring a bit of formality was probably a good bet.

“Good morning.” She nodded and, obviously uncomfortable, turned her attention back to the pan as she placed it on an iron rack on the counter.

Serena leaned toward him. “My mom decided to do an American breakfast just for you,” she whispered. “Bacon and eggs, French toast, cinnamon rolls. Of course, that was before Maria told her about you.”

Maria pulled a couple of strips of bacon from the pan and set them on a napkin-covered plate off to the side of the stove. “Hey, Serena? Can you take over for a second?”

“Be glad to,” Serena chirped. “But only if I get to wear the cool apron.”

Maria started toward them, slipping off the apron as she walked and passing it to Serena like trading places was normal. In this kitchen, Colin assumed it was. Serena started chatting away with her mother in Spanish as she donned the apron.

Up close, Colin noticed tension in the way Maria was moving. She gave him a quick peck on the cheek, careful to keep a bit of distance between them. “Any trouble finding the place?”

“Google,” he answered. Glancing over his shoulder, it was hard not to notice the way Carmen frowned slightly. He knew enough not to ask how it had gone earlier; instead, he defaulted to silence. Maria lowered her voice, concern etched on her face.

“Would you mind talking to my dad before we eat?”

“Okay.”

“And, um…” She trailed off.

“It’s your father,” he said. “I won’t forget.”

She nodded, the movement almost imperceptible. “I’m going to stay in here and help my mom in the kitchen,” she said. “My dad’s at the table on the back porch. Do you want any coffee?”

“I’m fine,” Colin replied.

“Water?”

“I’m fine,” he said again.

“Okay…” She took a step backward. “I guess I better get back to the kitchen, then.”

Colin watched as she backed away, past a refrigerator decorated with dozens of photos, letters, and other keepsakes, before she turned around. He moved toward the slider and as soon as he opened the door, Felix turned his way. There was less anger than he’d anticipated, though the shock and disappointment were evident, as was his obvious antagonism. In his lap, a small white dog was sleeping.

Colin closed the door behind him and walked toward Felix, his eyes steady. Nearing the table, he offered his hand.

“Good morning, Mr. Sanchez. Maria said you wanted to speak with me.”

Felix looked toward the hand before he reluctantly offered his own. Colin stood, waiting for Felix to invite him to sit at the table. Eventually Felix nodded toward a chair, and Colin sat. He clasped his hands and rested them in front of him, remaining quiet. There was no point in trying to make small talk or pretending that he didn’t know what Felix wanted to discuss.

Felix was in no rush to speak and took his time scrutinizing him. “Maria said that you were in trouble with the law,” he finally began. “Is that true?”

“Yes,” Colin answered. Over the next half hour, the full story came out in bits and pieces, much as it had with Maria that first night on the beach. He didn’t sugarcoat his past or attempt to mislead Felix; he was who he was. Like with Maria, Felix’s shock was pronounced at times and he pressed for further clarification; when Colin eventually recounted what happened at the first military school he’d attended, Colin thought he saw a flash of sudden understanding. By the time he finished, Felix was less on edge than he had been when Colin had first joined him on the porch, but it was also clear that he needed time to think about all that he’d learned. No surprise there. Felix was a father and Maria was his daughter, and there was only so far he would go.

“You claim that you’ve changed and I would like to believe you, but I’m not sure that I do.”

“Okay.” Colin nodded.

“What if you get arrested again?”

“I don’t plan on it.”

“That’s the problem. People seldom plan on it.”

Colin said nothing. There was really nothing to say.

Felix continued to pet the little white dog. “If you do get arrested, what will happen?”

“I won’t see her. I’ll end it. The worst thing would be for her to think she should wait.”

After a moment, Felix offered a slight nod, satisfied but still unsure as to whether he believed it. “If you ever hurt my daughter or put my daughter in danger…”

He didn’t finish, but he didn’t need to. Colin knew what Felix wanted to hear, and because it was true, he had no trouble saying it.

“It won’t happen.”

“I have your word.”

“Yes.”

Just then, Maria popped her head out, clearly nervous but also relieved that she hadn’t heard any shouting. “Are you two about finished? Brunch is ready.”

Felix exhaled. “We’re done,” he said. “Let’s eat.”

 

 

After they’d finished eating, Serena and her parents began to clean up while Maria lingered behind with Colin. “What did you say to him?” Maria asked.

“The truth,” Colin answered.

“All of it?”

“Yes.”

Maria appeared flummoxed. “Then it went a lot better than I thought it would.”

Maria was right – the brunch had been relatively pleasant, with Serena chattering on about the scholarship, Steve, and the escapades of her numerous friends. Felix and Carmen had occasionally asked questions, even lobbing a few queries toward Colin, though all were about work or school. When he’d mentioned MMA, he thought that Carmen had paled just a bit.

“Still…” Maria said. “I guess you were right. It was best to get it all out there in the beginning.”

Sometimes
, Colin thought.
Not always
. Felix had been cordial, but there wasn’t any fondness or trust evident, both of which would take time to achieve, if that was possible at all. He didn’t say that, though. Instead, he reached for the door.

“Do you want to do some paddleboarding later?” he asked.

“How about we do something different instead. Like… Jet Skiing. We can rent them at the beach. Does that sound fun?”

He recalled the sight of her in a bikini again. “Actually, that sounds great.”

 

 

They met at Wrightsville Beach later that afternoon and spent a couple of hours on Jet Skis before Colin returned home to squeeze in a quick workout. They cooked dinner at Maria’s and then, like the night before, spent the next few hours wrapped in each other’s arms.

Monday morning came too soon, but that week they spent as much time together as they could. Colin met Maria for lunch twice, and on Wednesday, she spent the evening at Crabby Pete’s, nursing a Diet Pepsi and working on a legal brief for Barney with her MacBook propped on the bar in front of her. Aside from his shifts and classes, a few hours for working out, and family brunch, they were together almost every minute, and went to both the farmers’ market and the aquarium, neither of which Colin had ever contemplated visiting before.

Through it all, he simply tried to embrace the way he felt about her. He didn’t think about it, didn’t worry about it, didn’t try to understand it. Instead, he enjoyed the way he felt whenever she laughed, and how sexy she was when she knit her eyebrows in concentration; he savored the feel of her hand in his as they walked and talked, their conversations drifting from the serious to the silly.

On Sunday night, in bed after making love, Maria was lying on her stomach, her knees bent and feet up as she nibbled on some grapes. Colin found it impossible to take his eyes from her, ogling her until she playfully tossed a grape at him.

“Stop staring. You’re making me feel self-conscious.”

He reached for the grape and popped it in his mouth. “Why?”

“Because I’m Catholic and we’re not married, maybe?”

He chuckled. “Your mother asked if I was Catholic, didn’t she? When we were at lunch the first time?”

“You understand Spanish?”

“Not really. I took it in high school and barely passed, but I heard my name and the word
católico
when she was at the table. It wasn’t that hard to translate. But yes,” he continued. “I was raised Catholic. I was baptized and confirmed, the whole nine yards. But I pretty much stopped going to church after I got sent off to school, so I’m not sure what that makes me now.”