See Me (2 page)

C
olin Hancock stood over the sink in the bathroom at the diner, his shirt raised to better examine the bruise on his ribs. He guessed that it would deepen to a dark purple by the time he woke tomorrow. Even grazing the bruise made him wince, and while he knew from experience that the pain could be overridden for a while, he wondered whether it would hurt to breathe in the morning.

His face, though…

That might end up being a problem – not for him, but for others. Certainly his college classmates would stare at him with wide, frightened eyes and whisper about him behind his back, though he doubted that any of them would actually ask him what had happened. During the first few weeks at the university, most of his classmates had seemed nice enough, but it had been clear that none of them knew what to make of him, nor had any tried to speak to him. Not that it bothered him. For one thing, virtually all of them were six or seven years younger than he was, all were female, and he suspected that as far as recent life experiences went, they had little in common with him. In time, like everyone else, they’d end up drawing their own conclusions about him. Frankly, it wasn’t worth worrying about.

Still, he had to admit that he was particularly ghoulish right now. His left eye was swollen and the white of his right eye was a bloody red. There was a gash in the center of his forehead that had been glued back together, and the lead-colored bruise on his right cheekbone resembled a birthmark. His split, swollen lips completed the picture. What he really needed was to put an ice pack on his face as soon as possible if he wanted the girls in his classes to be able to concentrate at all. But first things first; right now, he was starved and he needed fuel. He hadn’t eaten much in the last two days, and he’d wanted something fast, convenient, and – if possible – not entirely unhealthy. Unfortunately, at this time of night most places were already closed, so he’d ended up at a run-down diner just off the highway with bars on the windows, water stains on the walls, peeling linoleum on the floor, and booths held together with duct tape. But if the place had one saving grace, it was that none of the other customers cared how he looked when he made his way to the table. People who came to dives like this late at night were good at minding their own business. As far as he could tell, half the people here were trying to sober up after a night of hard drinking, while the other half – designated drivers, no doubt – were sobering up, too, only marginally less intoxicated.

It was the kind of place where it would have been easy to get in trouble, and after he’d turned into the gravel lot with Evan following in his Prius, he’d half expected Evan to keep going. But Evan must have suspected the same thing about possible trouble. It was the only reason he’d ever set foot in an establishment like this, especially at this time of night. Evan didn’t exactly blend in with the late-evening crowd here, what with his pink shirt, argyle socks, leather loafers, and neatly parted sandy blond hair. In fact, his Prius might as well have been a neon sign announcing that his goal was to get beaten up by the good old boys in pickup trucks who’d just spent most of the night getting wasted.

Colin turned on the faucet and wet his hands before bringing them to his face. The water was cold, exactly what he wanted. His skin felt like it was on fire. The marine he’d fought had hit a lot harder than he’d expected – and that didn’t count the illegal blows – but who would have known by looking at him? Tall and thin, jarhead haircut, goofy eyebrows… He shouldn’t have underestimated the guy, and he told himself he wouldn’t let it happen again. Either that, or he’d end up scaring his classmates all year long, which just might ruin the whole college experience for them.
There’s this super scary guy in my class with bruises all over his face and these crazy tattoos, Mom!
, he could imagine them saying on the phone.
And I have to sit right next to him!

He shook the water from his hands. Leaving the restroom, he spotted Evan in the corner booth. Unlike him, Evan would have fit right in at the college. He still had a baby face, and as he approached, Colin wondered how many times a week he even had to shave.

“That took you long enough,” Evan said as Colin slid into the booth. “I was wondering if you got lost.”

Colin slouched against the vinyl cushion. “I hope you weren’t too nervous all alone out here.”

“Ha, ha.”

“I have a question for you.”

“Go ahead.”

“How many times a week do you shave?”

Evan blinked. “You were in the bathroom for ten minutes and that’s what you were thinking about?”

“I wondered about it while I was walking to the table.”

Evan stared at him. “I shave every morning.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean, why? For the same reason you do.”

“I don’t shave every morning.”

“Why are we even talking about this?”

“Because I was curious and I asked and then you answered,” Colin said. Ignoring Evan’s expression, he nodded toward the menus. “Did you change your mind and decide to order?”

Evan shook his head. “Not a chance.”

“You’re not going to eat anything?”

“No.”

“Acid reflux?”

“Actually, it has more to do with my suspicion that the last time the kitchen was inspected, Reagan was president.”

“It’s not that bad.”

“Have you seen the cook?”

Colin glanced toward the grill behind the counter; the cook was right out of central casting, with a greasy apron straining to cover his ample gut, a long ponytail, and tattoos covering most of his lower arms.

“I like his tats.”

“Gee, there’s a surprise.”

“It’s the truth.”

“I know. You always tell the truth. That’s part of your problem.”

“Why is it a problem?”

“Because people don’t always want the truth. Like when your girlfriend asks if a particular outfit makes her look fat, you should tell her she looks beautiful.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“That’s probably because you told the last one she looked fat without adding the beautiful part.”

“That’s not what happened.”

“You get my point, though. Sometimes, you need to… stretch the truth to get along with people.”

“Why?”

“Because that’s what normal people do. That’s the way society works. You can’t just tell people whatever pops into your mind. It makes them uncomfortable or hurts their feelings. And just so you know, employers hate it.”

“Okay.”

“You don’t believe me?”

“I believe you.”

“But you don’t care.”

“No.”

“Because you’d rather tell the truth.”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“It’s what I’ve learned works for me.”

Evan stayed silent for a moment. “Sometimes I wish I could be more like that. Just tell my boss what I really think of him without caring about the consequences.”

“You can. You choose not to.”

“I need the paycheck.”

“That’s an excuse.”

“Maybe.” Evan shrugged. “But it’s what I’ve learned works for me. Sometimes lying is necessary. For instance, if I told you that I saw a couple of roaches under the table while you were in the bathroom, you might feel the same way about eating here that I do.”

“You know you don’t have to stay, right? I’ll be okay.”

“So you say.”

“You need to worry about yourself, not me. And besides, it’s getting late. Aren’t you heading to Raleigh with Lily tomorrow?”

“First thing in the morning. We’ll go to service at eleven with my parents, and have brunch right afterwards. But unlike you, I won’t have any trouble getting out of bed tomorrow morning. You look terrible, by the way.”

“Thanks.”

“Your eye, especially.”

“It won’t be as swollen tomorrow.”

“Your other one. I think you popped a few blood vessels. Either that, or you’re actually a vampire.”

“I noticed that.”

Evan leaned back, spreading his arms slightly. “Do me a favor, okay? Keep yourself hidden from the neighbors tomorrow. I’d hate for them to think I had to get rough on you for being late on the rent or whatever. I don’t want to get a bad reputation as a landlord.”

Colin smiled. He outweighed Evan by at least thirty pounds, and he liked to joke that if Evan had ever set foot in a gym, it was probably to conduct an audit.

“I promise to stay out of sight,” Colin offered.

“Good. Considering my reputation and all.”

Just then, the waitress came by, dropping off a plate loaded with scrambled egg whites and ham, along with a gelatinous bowl of oatmeal. As Colin pulled the bowl closer, he glanced at Evan’s mug.

“What are you drinking?”

“Hot water with lemon.”

“Seriously?”

“It’s past midnight. If I had coffee, I’d be up all night.”

Colin scooped a bit of oatmeal into his mouth before swallowing. “Okay.”

“What? No snide comment?”

“I’m just surprised they have lemon here.”

“And I’m surprised they do scrambled egg whites. You’re probably the first person in history who’s ever even attempted to eat a healthy meal here.” He reached for his water. “By the way, what
are
you planning to do tomorrow?”

“I have to change the ignition switch in my car. It’s not starting the way it should. After that, I’ll do the lawn and then hit the gym.”

“Do you want to come with us?”

“Brunch isn’t really my thing.”

“I wasn’t inviting you to brunch. I doubt they’d even let you in the country club looking the way you do. But you could see your parents in Raleigh. Or your sisters. It’s on the way to Chapel Hill.”

“No.”

“I just thought I’d ask.”

Colin scooped a spoonful of oatmeal. “Don’t.”

Evan leaned back in his seat. “There were a few great fights tonight, by the way. The one after yours was awesome.”

“Yeah?”

“A guy named Johnny Reese had a submission in the first round. Took the guy down like a stud, maneuvered him into a choke hold, and it was lights out. The dude moves like a cat.”

“Your point is?”

“He’s way better than you.”

“Okay.”

Evan drummed his fingers on the table. “So… are you okay with how your fight went tonight?”

“It’s over.”

Evan waited. “And?”

“That’s it.”

“Do you still think that what you’re doing is a good idea? I mean… you know.”

Colin scooped a bite of eggs onto his fork. “I’m still here with you, aren’t I?”

 

 

Half an hour later, Colin was back on the highway. The clouds that had been threatening a storm for the last few hours finally obliged, releasing a torrent of wind and rain punctuated by lightning and thunder. Evan had left a few minutes before Colin did, and as Colin settled in behind the wheel of the Camaro he’d been restoring over the last few years, he found his thoughts drifting to his friend.

He’d known Evan as long as he could remember. When Colin was young, his family used to spend summers at a beach cottage in Wrightsville Beach, and Evan’s family lived right next door. They’d passed long, sun-drenched days walking the beach, playing catch, fishing, and either surfing or riding boogie boards. More often than not, they’d spent the night at each other’s houses, until Evan’s family moved to Chapel Hill and Colin’s life went completely in the toilet.

The facts were fairly straightforward: He was the third child and only son of wealthy parents with a fondness for nannies and absolutely no desire for a third child. He was a colicky baby and then a high-energy child with a raging case of ADHD, the kind of kid who threw regular temper tantrums, couldn’t focus, and found it impossible to sit still. He drove his parents crazy at home, ran off one nanny after another, and struggled endlessly in school. He had a great teacher in third grade who made things better for a while, but in fourth grade, he started going downhill again. He got in one fight after another on the playground and was nearly held back. It was around that time that he came to be regarded as having
serious issues
, and in the end, not knowing what else to do, his parents shipped him off to military school, hoping the structure would do him good. His experience that first year was horrific, and he was expelled halfway through the spring semester.

From there, he was sent to another military school in a different state, and over the next few years, he expended his energies in combat sports – wrestling, boxing, and judo. He took his aggression out on others, sometimes with too much enthusiasm, often just because he wanted to. He cared nothing about grades or discipline. Five more expulsions and five different military schools later, he graduated, just barely, as an angry and violent young man with no plans for his life and no interest in finding any. He moved back in with his parents and seven bad years followed. He watched his mother cry and listened to his father plead with him to change, but he ignored them. He worked with a therapist at his parents’ insistence, but he continued his downward spiral, subconscious self-destruction his primary goal. The therapists’ words, not his, though he now agreed with them. Whenever his parents kicked him out of the main house in Raleigh, he’d crash at the family’s beach cottage, biding his time before returning home, the cycle beginning anew. When Colin was twenty-five, he was given one final chance to make changes in his life. Unexpectedly, he did just that. And now here he was, in college with plans to spend the next few decades in the classroom, hoping to be a mentor to children, which would make no sense at all to most people.