See (29 page)

She shook her head and looked away. “You saw Austin last night,” she mumbled. I nodded. “Did you remember him telling us about Chara – the string – that path he showed us?”

“
It’s all vague, Madison…when I remember things, it’s like watching a life that doesn’t belong to me.”

She tried to smile. “It makes sense that your memory would come back like that….that’s the way you see,” she mumbled.

I wanted to question her about seeing, but I was too worried about her. “What does Austin have to do with this dream – this boy?”

“
I don’t know…I just know that when we met him…the first image I saw was the guy in my dreams. It’s like Austin is a doorway to him….but I’m too scared to go.”

“
We’re not going anywhere,” I said, putting my arm around her. “Not yet…don’t be scared of this – I’m told dreams are the mind’s eyes. This guy could really need you, and I know you wouldn’t let anyone be in pain without a reason.”

She wiped away a tear that she was too brave to let fall. “I don’t know….it seems so tangled. Sometimes…sometimes in my dreams, he looks right at me, and I can feel…I can feel utter devotion. Other times, he’s looking at someone else…she looks like me – but I’m not her, and this…rage soars through me – because I don’t want him to look at her like that.” She looked to her side at me. “How crazy is that? To be jealous of someone that may not be real – to feel like I have some kind of claim on him.”

“
It’s not crazy – you said it yourself – Scorpios are jealous creatures.”

“
When we get through this…this thing that has happened to you, and Draven convinces you to go with Austin – I’m coming, too, but only to protect you…I think….I think if I ever saw this guy in real life – I would have no choice but to run.”

“
Why would you run?” I asked, bewildered, as I brushed her long, dark hair over her shoulder.

“
Because I’m not gonna let him hurt me….I don’t want to feel the way I feel in my dream.”

“
Maybe that girl with him is hurting him, and you need to save him,” I said as I looked into her emerald green eyes.

She smirked and shook her head. “Maybe…but he doesn’t seem to mind.”

“
Why do you feel like something dark has him?”

“
I – I just feel like everything that we’ve seen or heard is nothing compared to what’s around him – I swear, it’s like a living hell – sometimes I can see around him, and even though where he’s at is nice – almost like a palace…the world is gray – lost…so lost.”

“
That doesn’t sound like the place Austin is talking about – Chara.”

“
Right…but Austin said there are other dimensions. I have no doubt that one of them is the one I dream of; that one of them holds this tall, dark, flawless image I see in my dreams.”

“
Well, then, if I ever figure out who I am – and we go…we’ll just walk by that one…we’ll go when you’re ready.”

She ran her hands across her face. “Thanks…sorry to bring this up…I think Britain has made it all surface, and I just…just wanted to talk about it.”

“
How did he bring it up?”

She shook her head from side to side. “It’s stupid.”

“
Tell me.”

“
Last night, I dreamt about Britain and this other guy – they were fighting….and I woke up before I could see who won….and what’s really sad…is I don’t know who I wanted to win…and that doesn’t make any sense because I can’t stand Britain.”

“
I think you kinda like him,” I mumbled.

She shook her head from side to side. “No…I just don’t get him…and I hate not understanding something.”

We sat in silence for a minute, both lost in twisted thoughts. Madison took a deep breath and stood up. “OK…I’m gonna go…I’m still trying to look into that birthmark of Bianca’s, and I’m trying to track down Britain and Bianca’s family line – history repeats itself.”

“
Let me help.”

“
No…I’ve got this. Focus on bringing back more of your memory.”

She leaned down and hugged me, then turned to leave the room.

I bit my bottom lip as I watched her leave….something told me that her dreams – what I was going through now….was just the beginning….that our fate was here and there was no way to avoid it anymore.

I tried to weave my new memories into the ones I already had. From this point, it looked like the game I was playing with Bianca was a battle of the wits – I could only assume that if I played out the role she had created for me, I would find a way to win – that my wit could find a way out of this.

Chapter 12

I reached for Britain’s phone. I was terrified that if I didn’t text him like I told Bianca I would – that he’d just show up. I read through the texts that came from him since last night. They started out by saying that he should just come now – that he was worried about me. They then moved on to him telling me that my silence made him think it would be worse if he did. Around one in the morning, he started to ask if I was home – if I had fun – for me to call him – that he couldn’t fall asleep without hearing my voice. This morning, the texts said he was here and sent me the address of his house. The last one warned me that Bianca was on her way to my house and he couldn’t stop her – for me to think of something quick to say to my sister. I was furious with myself – I couldn’t believe how out of control I had let this get.

I took a deep breath and texted: ‘That warning came a little too late – not good.”

“
Sorry – you know how determined she can be when she wants something.”

“
I’m not a thing – I’m over this.”

“
Over what”

“
You and her – it’s like it doesn’t matter what I say you don’t listen – I feel ignored.”

“
You’re not ignored – far from it”

“
Then how come what I say doesn’t matter – I have no free will.”

He didn’t text back, and for a minute I was starting to believe that those two words were a powerful defense.

Then he texted. “I don’t know what she said to you – but you know I care about your free will.”

“
Then why don’t you see that I need space – from both of you.”

“
That hurts Charlie – you can hate her that’s fine just don’t assume we are one in the same.”

“
Hard not to” I rebutted.

“
Come see me.”

“
Madison is here – not tonight.”

“
When?”

“
Maybe tomorrow before my mom gets in.”

“
Maybe – or yes?”

“
Yes – only for a minute – and I have to bring an alibi”

“
Madison?”

“
Yes.”

“
Sounds like fun.”

I shook my head – I didn’t like the idea that Madison was dreaming about him any more than she did….none of this made any sense.

“
I have to go – tomorrow.”

I hit the ‘Sleep’ button on his phone and tossed it in the drawer of nightstand.

I reached for my phone. The last text was from Draven; he said he was on his way. That was five minutes ago. I scrolled through the other texts, not even bothering to read the ones from Bianca. There was one from my mom, telling me to call her when I got up. I laid my phone down so I could finish getting dressed. I knew Draven wouldn’t care if I was on the phone with her when he got here. I brushed my hair, then put on a little eyeliner and perfume. I pulled on my Sketchers, then found my mom’s number in the contacts.

She answered on the first ring. “I was about to call you – I just got off the phone with Kara,” she said.

I cringed, wondering if Kara had told her about Bianca being here.

“
She said you call a lot,” I answered quietly.

“
I just wanna make sure you’re OK; I know she can get lost in her work,” Mom said

“
Runs in the family,” I said, not able to hold in the sarcasm. I swear, it was a reflex that had gotten out of control.

“
Fair comeback – but I’m trying. I’ll be there tomorrow - did Kara tell you?”

“
Yeah – at three, right?” I said, crossing my legs on my bed.

“
Yeah, I’ll rent a car and drive to the house.”

“
I’ll come get you – I have a car now,” I said, trying to sound proud of her gift.

“
You do,” she said in a tender tone, “but I wanna have something to drive anyway.”

It was quiet for a second.

“
So I hear you had dinner with Nana,” she said.

“
I did.”

“
Anything else happen?” she asked casually.

“
Yeah…a lot.”

“
Do you wanna talk about it?”

“
I’m still trying to figure it all out, mom…but I know that…I know I forgot something that I never should have.”

“
I don’t think you ever really forgot him…you may look like your dad…maybe even play like him, but that stubborn determination comes from me – you were just trying to protect the ones you love. I – I just want to make sure that the next time something like this happens, you trust me enough to tell me.”

“
I do trust you,” I said in a whisper. I really wanted to let her in – but there was a wall between us, one I doubt I’d ever figure out how to climb.

I heard Kara and Draven’s hypnotic voice echoing through the house. My eyes moved to the stairs, expecting to see him there at any moment.

“
What brought your memory back…the music or Draven?” she asked.

“
Both…it’s not all here, though…I’m still lost.”

“
I talked to Nana today; we both agree that it may not be a good idea for Draven to see what you went through – she said she’d help you work through it…please let her.”

“
I will,” I said as Draven reached the top step of my room.

I smiled at him and mouthed the word ‘mom’. A smile beamed across his face, and my heart started to pound. He walked quietly to my side and sat down next to me, leaning back on his arms. I breathed in the addicting aroma of his cologne, and my eyes dared to glance over his perfect body. His jeans were loose, but his dark green T-shirt seemed to cling to him in all the right places. I felt heat rise in my cheeks as I looked into his captivating eyes as they stared intently at me.

“
Is he there now?”

“
Yeah, he just got here,” I said, smiling at him.

He reached for my hand and kissed my fingertips gently, sending a warm sensation to every part of my body.

“
OK… well, listen, if the weather gets really bad – just stay there. I don’t want you two trying to get across that creek in the middle of a storm. I think we need to look into replacing the floor in that bridge this summer; the rising water over the years has made the wood weak.”

“
Maybe we should just stay here,” I said, glancing at my side at Draven. He furrowed his eyebrows to question what my mom was saying.

“
No…you need to see Nana…to learn to see again.”

I swallowed as I felt my stomach tie itself in knots; I was sure she’d never acknowledged ‘seeing’ around me.

“
Can you see?” I asked timidly.

Draven sat up and stared at me with wide eyes.

She was quiet for a second, then said, “We’ll talk about that tomorrow…I want you to play for me.”

“
You really are serious about that, aren’t you?” I asked as fear came over my expression.

I was making Draven uneasy. I put my hand on his knee to tell him I was fine.

“
Very…” she said as she let an uneasy breath out.

“
OK,” I said as a timid smile came to the corners of my lips.

“
Ask Draven to come to dinner with us tomorrow…I want to thank him for bringing you back.”

“
K”

“
Love you, Charlie.”

“
Love you.”

“
I’ll see you soon,” she said as she hung up the phone.

I slowly let the phone down and slid the bar to end the call.

“
Are you OK?” Draven asked as he slowly rubbed his hand across my back.

“
I can’t believe she wants me to play for her,” I answered, looking at him.

A smile spread across his addictive image. “Maybe some good will come out of all of this.”

“
I don’t think I can,” I said, trying to smile.

“
I know you can,” he said as he leaned in to kiss my lips. He reached his arms around my waist and pulled me against him. As our lips moved against each other, my head spun. Everything about him was so insanely addicting; it was like he was the air I was breathing in. It was impossible to care about someone more than I cared about him – I knew the risk of losing him was too great. I had to fight Bianca on my own.

Our kiss slowed, then I pulled away and laid my head on his shoulder. I felt his arms tighten around me. I let my lips touch his warm neck, then whispered, “I’m sorry…for everything.”

He leaned his shoulder back, causing me to look up. He then put his hands on either side of my face. “Don’t be sorry…I know,” his eyes looked over every part of my face. “I know you had your reasons.”

I let a breath out, then leaned forward and stole one more kiss before I stood and grabbed my bag. “I want to see…” I looked around at the thin air chasing the guitar that had fallen into the background. “I want to see everything.”