Seduced in the Dark (38 page)

Caleb stared into Livvie’s pleading eyes and
for a moment he thought he might open his mouth and say yes.

“
I expect obedience, Caleb. I expect your
loyalty. Anyone who betrays me will only do it once. Do you
understand?” Rafiq had said ominously.

“
Yes, Rafiq, I understand,” Caleb had
replied.

“I want to, Livvie,” Caleb whispered, “Aside
from my revenge, I can honestly tell you, there is nothing I desire
more than to take you away and find out what this thing between us
is all about.” He reached for her hands and placed them in her lap
before he stroked her hair affectionately.

“But, this is who I am. I repay my debts.
Nothing comes before family, loyalty, duty, and honor. Rafiq is as
close to family as I can remember, and I owe him. If you’re asking
me to betray him…you can never accept who I am.”

Livvie shut her eyes tightly, seemingly
processing the pain Caleb’s words had caused. He felt stupid and
naïve. He should have known Livvie would be incapable of
understanding him or his motives. Livvie was no monster and she
wouldn’t become one simply because Caleb was.

“Why does this guy need to die so badly,
Caleb? What did he do? What is so horrible, you’d dedicate your
life, and sacrifice your happiness to kill him? Help me understand,
Caleb,” Livvie whispered.

Caleb looked at Livvie, and had he seen any
trace of condescension, he would have told her to go to hell, but
the only thing expressed in Livvie’s eyes was concern. He was
surprised he even recognized it. Rafiq had never really been
concerned for Caleb.

Rafiq had been Caleb’s salvation, his tutor,
mentor, and sometimes friend. He’d clothed him, provided shelter,
and food. He’d nursed him from a traumatized whore into a dangerous
man. Yet, Rafiq had always demanded his due. At the slightest hint
of uncertainty on Caleb’s part, Rafiq never hesitated to remind him
of his place. Caleb’s life had always been conditional. Rafiq’s
favor had always been conditional.

Caleb had never questioned Rafiq’s methods
or his authority. It had never mattered to him that Rafiq demanded
blind obedience. He had always believed he was lucky to be alive
and been grateful for Rafiq. Caleb was still grateful and always
would be, but until Livvie, Caleb had never known how it felt to
have someone care, truly care, for him.

“I think…,” Caleb’s heart hammered hard in
his chest, “I think he…sold me.” His flesh felt like it was on
fire, like it would burn, crackle, and molt right off his
bones.

“Sold? As…as, in…?” Livvie seemed at a loss
for words.

Caleb looked her dead in the eyes and
steeled himself, “It didn’t happen last week, alright!” He said
angrily. “I was young. I don’t even remember how young I was. I
have no memories of my life before Narweh. Sometimes, I think I
remember something, but I can’t be sure. Even my early years with
Narweh get mixed up. I wasn’t born a monster, Livvie.”

Livvie’s face crumpled and she seemed to
explode with tears. She wrapped her arms around Caleb’s neck,
squeezing him with all her strength, “Oh, god! Oh, Caleb. I’m so
sorry I called you that. I’m so sorry.”

Caleb’s emotions were everywhere. He didn’t
want her pity. He never wanted pity. Still, he seemed to need
Livvie’s arms. He didn’t have it in him to push her away.

“I wasn’t alone. There were six of us,”
Caleb said. He held Livvie tight to his chest. “I don’t remember
being sold. There wasn’t an auction or anything. I think I came in
a box. To this day, I can’t stand cramped spaces – or boats – I
hate boats.”

“Things…,” Caleb struggled, “happened to me.
Narweh liked to beat me…among other things.” Caleb felt Livvie’s
arms tighten around him.

Mine!

“I was getting too old, I think. I was tall
compared to the others. I had hair on my balls and under my arms.
The men who....” Caleb swallowed hard, “They wanted boys, not men.
I think Narweh meant to kill me.”

“Stop,” Livvie sobbed into Caleb’s neck, “I
can’t listen anymore.”

Caleb felt something slide loose inside him:
shame. Pure, uncut, shame rolled through him. “Don’t love me now
you know I used to be a whore?”

He pushed Livvie away and she flopped
backward onto the bed. Her red, puffy eyes fixed on Caleb with
disdain. “You’re an idiot!” she said and sat up. “I can’t listen
anymore because I can’t stand the thought of you being hurt!” She
crawled toward Caleb slowly, wary.

Caleb wanted to run, but he remained
immobile as Livvie’s words tried to settle into his mind. “It was a
long time ago. I made him pay.” Caleb met Livvie’s eyes and saw a
flicker of realization light her features.

“The bikers,” she whispered.

“Yes,” Caleb said. He cleared his throat,
trying to keep calm when all he wanted was to destroy something in
a fit of murderous rage.

Livvie nodded, “Those men deserved to die.”
Caleb reared back, incredulous. Livvie continued, “Narweh deserved
to die, too. And I…I get why you can’t let this go.”

“You do?” Caleb’s heart thudded in his
ears.

Livvie smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes,
“Yes, Caleb.”

“But…?” Caleb prodded.

Livvie’s mouth turned down in the corners,
“I can’t let you replace me. I couldn’t live with myself, Caleb. I
couldn’t live…with you.”

“Maybe it’s not up to you!” Caleb
snapped.

Livvie held up her hand, her fingers curled
under as she reached for Caleb. She approached him slowly, as one
would a wild animal.

Caleb had the desire to push her hand away,
but the sorrow on Livvie’s face gave him pause. He let her touch
his face and he marveled at how much affection he could feel in her
simple, yet complex touch. He closed his eyes and let himself feel
loved, just for a few seconds to commit it to memory. It hurt to
think it might be the first and last time anyone ever touched him
in such a way.

“I can’t wait two years for you to come get
me, Caleb. I’m done being the damsel in distress. I don’t need
anyone to save me,” she said. Her voice was calm, resolute.

“Livvie…” Caleb began, but she put her
fingers to his lips.

“I’ll do it, Caleb. I’ll go to the auction
and I’ll be perfect. I’ll make the son of a bitch want me,” her
breath shuddered, “and when we’re alone…I’ll kill him for you.”

Caleb’s eyes flew open and he shook his
head, “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“You want him dead, right?” Livvie said,
“What does it matter who kills him or when? I could poison him or
something.”

Caleb couldn’t help but smile, even as he
knew he would never let her do such a thing. The fact she would
even offer….

“I thought you weren’t interested in
revenge?” Caleb teased.

“I’m not interested in
my
revenge,
Caleb. But for you….” Livvie whispered, and her eyes said the
rest.

Caleb lunged toward Livvie, toppling her
backward onto the bed. When Livvie gasped in surprise, he took the
opportunity to kiss her. He wished he couldn’t taste Kid in her
mouth, but he refused to let it stop him. He needed this. He needed
Livvie and her love. His heart had never felt so flooded. He felt
he could burst open with the strength and force of it, nothing but
need and desire would come pouring out of him.

He put everything he felt, but couldn’t put
into words, into his kiss. His hands held on to Livvie, pressing
her closer, deeper into his body. His inability to touch every part
of her at one time seemed a great injustice.

Closer!

Mine!

He broke away from the kiss, only because he
needed her permission. He was done taking anything from her she
wasn’t willing to give. “Can I….”
Fuck you?
Didn’t seem
right.
Make love to you?
So, fucking cheesy.

“Yes, Caleb! For fucksake, yes!” Livvie
cried and pulled Caleb back down into their kiss.

Caleb chuckled softly into her mouth, but
quickly regained his bearings. He wanted this to be perfect. For
the both of them. Despite how his own body protested, he pulled
himself up and off the bed. He held out his hand for Livvie before
he spoke, “I want to take a shower. I’ve waited a long time for
this and I just want it to be us. I only want to smell,
you
.”

Livvie blushed, but didn’t say anything. She
took Caleb’s hand and followed close behind him as they entered the
bathroom to wash all traces of the other man away.

Beneath the flood of warm water, he kissed
Livvie. Only hours before, he’d told her he would never kiss her
again. What an idiot he’d been! Pressed against her, his bare skin
against hers, he regretted every horrible thing he had done to
Livvie. He decided he would do anything to make it up to her. He
would beg her forgiveness. He would bare his soul. He would bleed
and die if he had to, but he would never hurt Livvie again.

“I love you,” she said between kisses.

“Shh,” Caleb whispered against her mouth. He
knew she wanted him to say the words. He wanted to say them as
well, but he didn’t want to lie. Caleb was a monster. Monsters
didn’t love. He cared. He hungered. He lusted. He felt more than he
ever dreamed possible, and yet…he couldn’t be sure it was love. He
wouldn’t lie.

Caleb went to his knees, kissing a trail
across Livvie’s body as he went. He sucked water from her nipples,
drawing her taut flesh into his mouth in long, greedy pulls. He
licked under her breasts and down her ribs. He worshipped her hips
and belly. Finally, he parted her legs to find the source of her
womanhood.

He could smell her arousal, see the redness
of her swollen clit as it peeked out from under her hood. Pushing
her legs farther apart, he stared at the open petals of her inner
lips. Soon, his cock would be sliding past them and into the heat
of her. She would be his – irrevocably. Caleb leaned forward and
kissed her lips as he would her mouth.

She moaned and her hands moved toward
Caleb’s head, pushing him closer. It was exactly where Caleb wanted
to be – closer. He teased her lips gently with the tip of this
tongue, letting them part slowly as her arousal and his mouth made
Livvie wetter. As she rocked on his face, he pushed deeper, tasting
her inside.

“Oh, Caleb,” she sighed. “Oh, god. You feel
so good.”

Caleb’s hands weren’t idle. They traveled up
and down her legs, sometimes spreading her thighs, other times
scratching up the backs of her legs, forcing her up on her toes. He
let them keep traveling as he licked, sucked, and even fucked
Livvie with his tongue.

“I’m gonna come,” Livvie panted. Caleb
grabbed her ass with both hands, holding her in place as he moaned
into her pussy and she came on his tongue.

“Caleb!” she shouted and fisted his hair.
She couldn’t move her hips, so she pulled him close.

Once Livvie had finished shivering, she let
go of Caleb’s hair. It had hurt, but he was okay with pain,
especially under the circumstances. He stood slowly, letting his
knees work out the pain from having been on the shower floor for so
long and turned off the water.

Livvie reached out and grasped his cock,
startling him. He was hard and her touch made him eager. As quickly
as was safely possible, he led the way out of the shower and back
into the bedroom. To hell with towels.

“I want you,” Caleb said. He slid against
Livvie in a preview of what was to come.

“I want you, too,” Livvie said and spread
her legs. She shivered, her hair and body soaking wet.

Caleb reached down to Livvie’s pussy and
rubbed her with his fingers, loving the sounds she made and the way
she undulated against him. Assured of her desire, Caleb slid his
index finger into Livvie’s tight, wet hole.

“Oh!” Livvie sighed. She rocked back and
forth.

Caleb’s head swam with desire. She was so
tight inside. Her muscles sucked on his finger, drawing it deeper
inside. There was no way he’d fit inside her if he didn’t prepare
her well enough. He dipped his head down to her nipple and trapped
the little bud between his lips. When her hips rocked up, he
slipped another finger inside.

“Ow!” she said, followed by a moan, as Caleb
laved her nipple.

Caleb waited for her to relax and for her
legs to drop open again before he slowly began moving his fingers
back and forth. Her muscles loosened in degrees, stretching around
his fingers, lubricating them with her desire.

“This is going to hurt a little. You know
that, right?” Caleb said. He stared down into Livvie’s
chocolate-colored eyes and saw her trust. He didn’t want to betray
it again.

“I know. It’s okay,” she said and pulled him
down toward her mouth. The kiss she placed on Caleb’s lips was
sweet and full of warmth.

Caleb felt the barricade of her virginity
with his fingers. “Put your hands over your head,” he said. Livvie
complied instantly and Caleb used his left hand to pin her wrists.
He pushed deeper with his fingers, slowly turning them
width-wise.

“Caleb!” Livvie tried to push away from his
fingers, her face a twisted mask of pain.

“I know, Livvie. I know it hurts, but it’ll
be over soon, I promise,” Caleb kissed her lips gently, not
offended she wasn’t kissing him back because she was too wrapped up
in her pain.

“Please,” she whimpered.

“Relax, Livvie,” he encouraged. His thumb
made circles around her clit as he continued to push against the
wall of her virginity. Finally, he felt it give way. It seemed to
dissolve as if it had never been.

“Ow,” Livvie whimpered and rubbed her head
against Caleb’s outstretched arm.

“Shh, it’s done. I think that was the worst
part,” he whispered and kissed her trembling lips. He let her
wrists go and he sighed when she wrapped her arms around his neck
and started kissing his neck.

Caleb cautiously slid his fingers out.
Livvie whined and stopped kissing him. They both looked at his
fingers and noticed her light pink blood on them. Caleb couldn’t
hear past the sound of his heart beating in his ears.