Secrets of the Wee Free Men and Discworld (12 page)

BOOK: Secrets of the Wee Free Men and Discworld
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With all of that power, there are bound to be some egos and evil among wizardkind. Just about every world with wizards goes through mage wars, as writers like Robert Jordan, Terry Goodkind, J. K. Rowling, Mercedes Lackey, and others attest. If you read any of their series, you know that these wars are sometimes triggered by evil wizards (or those with seriously confused priorities) bent on world domination. A small band of plucky heroes unsure of their own powers is there to try to stop them, even if they wind up sacrificing their lives in the process. In the Harry Potter series, Harry, Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore, and other wizards are on the side of good against Voldemort and his Death Eaters. In
Debt of Bones,
it's Zedd versus the evil Panis Rahl and, in
Wizard's First Rule,
Zedd and Richard square off against Darken Rahl. In
The Farthest Shore,
Ged is pitted against Cob, a wizard who just happens to be dead. In the Obsidian Trilogy, the war is between the human and elf mages (not that there are many of the latter) on the one side and the evil Endarkened mages. Although mage wars can sometimes foster wars between humans and other beings, the emphasis in a mage war is on those who wield the power.
Sourcery
describes the mage war in Discworld that results when the archchancellor's stolen hat is worn by the evil Abrim. Wizard egos get in the way of Ipslore and Abrim's twin quests for world domination. (More on the villain's quest in
chapter 12
.) Of course, Rincewind is in the thick of things (he usually is) and the world nearly ends—par for the course in Discworld and for the life of a wizard.
Top Gun
W
ho would win in a mage contest between the wizards of fiction? Take a look at the stats below.
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In a contest of sheer power, it's hard to say who would win since all are considered the leaders of wizards. Coin has an edge simply because his powers are akin to the gods of Discworld and because he was able to trap the gods in a ball of thought. As Pratchett describes it, Coin's too powerful even to remain in Discworld. Yet he's human and probably could be killed, although we're not sure how.
Ridcully is the dark horse. There are advantages and disadvantages to his mage supremacy. Advantages: (1) He's difficult to kill. Ask anyone who wants his job as archchancellor. (2) He would probably fight dirty. (3) He became a seventh-level wizard at an early age. Disadvantages: (1) He'd probably rather spend his time hunting than perfecting his art. (2) He didn't attain the eighth level (probably out of self-preservation). (3) We're not entirely positive that he could beat any of the other wizards in the chart, especially the sourcerer (okay, we know he can't beat Coin). (4) We seriously doubt that he'd care, unless a fellow mage trespassed on Ridcully's property or took his Wow-Wow sauce.
Raymond Feist wrote a number of books on Pug, so you know how formidable an opponent he is. Could he beat Ridcully or Coin? Hmmm. The jury's still out, especially since Pug's powers are akin to the gods'. Since Tolkien and T. H. White focused on the horrors and sadness of war, rather than testosterone posturing among wizards, we can't know the full extent of the powers of Merlin or Gandalf. Merlin's part human and part, well, other, thanks to being the son of an incubus and a human. (There's no Hallmark card for that.) But Gandalf is Maiar—a spirit being like an angel, according to Tolkien's The
Silmarillion
. And as for Dumbledore, well, you know what happened to him in book 6.
The Reaper Man
The Death of the Disc was a traditionalist who prided himself on his personal service and spent most of the time being depressed because this was not appreciated. He would point out that no one feared death itself, just pain and separation and oblivion, and that it was quite unreasonable to take against someone just because he had empty eye sockets and a quiet pride in his work.
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Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.
—W. Somerset Maugham
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Many would agree with us that Death is one of the most loved characters of Pratchett's Discworld. The inevitable mortality of us makes the idea of death scary, but we have a fascination with Pratchett's quirky representation. This personification of death
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is a seven-foot-tall skeletal man dressed in a black robe, with a scythe, who speaks in capital letters (more on this later). Readers are enamored
with him, because of his endearing personality and his love of cats, among other things. He is the kind of guy you can sit down with and have tea, as he does with Miss Flitworth in
Reaper Man.
(Actually, we recall that being a quite uncomfortable situation.) Or you may want to play a game with him in his room of lifetimers with the guys (you know, War, Pestilence, and Famine—more on them in
chapter 9
) . It is not uncommon to see Death at the gentlemen's club called Fidgett's. At times he is sympathetic, sentimental, and oftentimes he is humorous (not on purpose). After all, he is not the one who takes a person's life—just the one who picks up the dead.
Pratchett books are different from many other fantasy or science fiction stories in that he throws in enough death to make it clear that good doesn't always win. This creates the need for a character like Death because of the amount of souls in need of a pickup. He could have left it at that—you know, the clown
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is hit over the head by the ferocious werewolf and dies from a brain aneurysm, then continue on with the story—but typically an appearance of the character Death is in order. And eventually everyone meets Death.
Death has been around on the Disc since the first book of the Discworld series in 1983:
The Color of Magic.
He makes his appearances in almost all Discworld books, with the exception of
Wee Free Men,
but the major Death-themed books are
Mort, Reaper Man, Soul Music, Hogfather,
and
Thief of Time
. Even though Death appears in earlier books,
Mort
is the one in which his character is truly developed.
In
Reaper Man,
it is explained that Death was created by belief, just as were all the gods of the Disc. “He evolved, as it were, along with life. As soon as a living thing was even dimly aware of the concept of suddenly becoming a non-living thing, there was Death. He was Death long before humans ever considered him; they only
added the shape and all the scythe and robe business to a personality that was already millions of years old.”
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He is one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Death is not limited by time and space. He has no need to sleep, and knows everything
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Humans have been fascinated and fearful of death since the beginning of time, well, the beginning of mankind. It is only natural that we have personified Death into a skeletal form holding a scythe; after all, the Romans personified Genius by depicting a man holding a cornucopia.
A medieval painting depicts Death as playing chess with a man (more on games with Death later). Death seems to be holding the chessboard on his lap, and both Death and the man appear to have smiles.
Martine Leavitt wrote the book
Keturah and Lord Death,
which portrays Death uniquely as a young man who is the collector of souls. He is in love with the girl Keturah, who persuades him to let her live for just one more day (this happens multiple times) by telling him stories but not revealing the end. She must search out a love superior to death, to be granted life. Keturah alone is able to see Death and therefore knows when someone near her is about to be collected by him.
Death Takes a Holiday
is a romantic 1934 film about a personified Death who spends time on earth in hopes of understanding why humans fear him. He takes the form of a human named Prince Sirki. While taking a vacation from his job, he finds one who does not fear him and falls in love with her. While Death is on holiday, people
and other living things stop dying.
Meet Joe Black,
a 1998 loose remake of
Death Takes a Holiday,
is similar in storyline, but was much less well received and twice as long.
In Neil Gaiman's Sandman graphic novels, Death is a gothic young female who finds humans interesting and enlightening. Ironically, she is described as a joyful character, and she is able to cheer up her brother, Dream, in the first volume of the series (for more on that, see
chapter 9
). Neil Gaiman also has a portrayal of Death (Azrael) in the book
Good Omens,
which he co-wrote with Terry Pratchett.
Since Death is one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse, it is only appropriate that in Discworld he should have his own horse. Two horses shortly filled this order, but failed, due to too much limb repair (the skeletal steed) and too many fire hazards (the fiery steed torched the barn). Death then settled on a horse named Binky. His granddaughter, Susan, was so fond of Binky that he gave her a toy set of “My Little Binky” as a birthday present. Binky is a fantastic horse who walks on his own devised ground (he defies gravity; you may want to think of it as flying but it's not). Binky obliges Death by coming to him whenever he snaps his fingers and makes sure a rider doesn't fall off when riding him. Binky is just as obedient to Susan as he is for Death.
Binky is cared for well at Death's Domain. He wears a silver harness. The blacksmith Jason Ogg, whom Death considers “superb” at his job, makes horseshoes for Binky. Jason Ogg is the oldest son of Nanny Ogg and the blacksmith of Lancre. (For more about Jason, see
chapter 14
.)
Death decides to start a family because he wants to know what it's like to be human. He adopts Ysabell as a baby, upon the death of
her parents. Ysabell's daddy (Death) allows her to grow to be sixteen years old with the misconception that teenagers are easier to care for than young children are.
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Housed in Death's Domain where there is no aging, Ysabell remains a teenager until she leaves. In
Mort,
Ysabell eventually falls in love with the main character. Mort and Ysabell marry and leave Death's home and become mortal once again. Upon leaving, the couple is given the titles of Duke and Duchess of Sto Helit. Little is said about their lives after that, but we do know that they have a daughter whom they name Susan. Susan, though not blood- (or bone-) related to Death, takes on his some of his characteristics (that is what happens when you have Death in the family). Mort and Ysabell die at the beginning of the book
Soul Music
in a coach accident.
Mary Poppins is a magical nanny who comes to care for the Banks children during a difficult time. She is a character in a series of children's books by P. L. Travers and also is the title of the Disney movie released in 1964. The reason we bring this up is that Pratchett himself considers the character of Susan a “Gothic Mary Poppins” in
The Art of Discworld
book. One similarity is that even though Mary Poppins does magical things (such as having tea parties while floating in the air and jumping into chalk drawings on the sidewalk), she never admits that these things actually happened. She also is sure to act very proper; in a way, that seems contrary to the actual situations she finds herself, and the Banks children, in. However, Susan, who as far as we know never tidied up a nursery using magic and song, is quite magical and tries very hard to be normal and proper. But, of course, the obvious similarity
is that she is in fact a nanny in
Hogfather
and spends much time during this employment beating up monsters with a metal poker.
As we mentioned before, Susan has inherited some characteristics from her grandfather Death. When she needs to, she can walk through walls (and objects), knows some things before they actually happen, and can find people. She has trouble remembering to do some normal human things, such as going to sleep and using doorknobs, just like dear old Granddad. Despite these similarities, she spends a lot of time trying to avoid Grandpa. Susan is mortal and does not like cats, unlike her grandfather.
Besides the nanny position, Susan has also been employed as a teacher. Her teaching techniques are unconventional but effective. It is not uncommon for her to take her class on field trips that involve not only long distances but also travel through time. Her other profession, though she tries to avoid it, is the ability to take over for Death. She is quite capable of doing Death's work when needed, complete with his voice.
It is certainly the job of Death to collect souls. He doesn't appear at all deaths, but makes sure everything is going okay. On special occasions, he collects the souls of ordinary people but, typically, his haul encompasses witches, wizards, and royalty. His job isn't morbid all the time; he brings good news upon death to some, such as no more dandruff.
Death has taken on multiple other jobs throughout the Discworld series, from a short-order cook (
Mort
) to an actor (
Wyrd Sisters
) . Perhaps his most memorable job is as the Hogfather, in the book of the same title, when he tries to revive Discworldians' belief in the Santa Claus figure. He also has worked as a beggar, a farmer, and in the foreign legion as a soldier.
It is quite apparent that one of Death's jobs is not, and will never be, interior decoration. Though he lacks imagination, Death does have the ability to copy things. Therefore, his Domain is decked out with very big rooms (they may seem unreasonably large), a bedroom suite, a library, and even a cat flap in the back door, which seems to have been installed in
Hogfather
. He finds no reason to lock the back door. Everything is dreary, in black and gray, with the exception of living things that include Albert (the manservant), daughter Ysabell (when young and alive), and many cats (which appear in
Hogfather
). The house appears small from the outside.
In the kitchen, you will usually find Albert frying up some type of food. It is a good thing that Ysabell, Albert, and Mort eat, because Death has no need to partake of food. Sometimes, Albert will deliver tea to Death in his quarters. Perhaps this is comfort food. Albert, although a wizard, also has been known to serve as the valet and gardener.
Some of us are in daily contact with an hourglass—you know, the timekeeper with two (usually glass) bulbs that transfer some type of matter (typically sand) from the top section to the bottom one. Our daily encounter with this symbol, however, is no longer in physical form—it is in the form of a little icon on our computer screens and can cause a lot of frustration. Yes, the hourglass has become a modern symbol of consternation. How many times have you had to just stare at the hourglass on your screen and just wait and wait?
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It wouldn't be right to discuss Death's home without addressing the hourglasses that are held within it. This includes the hidden room where the hourglasses of the gods are kept; Susan discovers this room in
Hogfather.
Hourglasses, at least those of humans, reflect how much life a person has left. Once the person dies, the hourglass disappears, and when a person is born, a new one appears. These hourglasses in Discworld, called lifetimers, are for the most part the classic glass and sand variety (Bill Gates is yet to have automated this process). A separate room is used to house the god hourglasses, which include those of the Hogfather, the Tooth Fairy, and other mythological characters that live in Discworld. (See
chapter 9
. ) A lifetimer is displayed on the cover of
Mort
(of the HarperTorch edition that we have). In this book, Death turns Mort's lifetimer over to extend his life.
Hourglasses
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are also known as sand glasses or sand timers. Hourglasses are items often used in fiction to represent time. Like a genie in a bottle, an hourglass was used in Disney's
Aladdin
where Jafar, the nemesis, traps Princess Jasmine inside. Of course, the hourglass used is much larger than our much-loved computer icon (it is hard to determine how large something is when animated). In the Harry Potter series, large hourglass-looking statues are used to keep score among the different magical houses at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. And maybe you remember the hourglass in
The Wizard of Oz.
You are led to believe they are similar to Pratchett's lifetimers, in that it is showing the time left in the life of the main character, Dorothy. In the end, that hourglass is used as a bomb.
Hourglasses have been symbols of our limited time on earth in various times and cultures. They have been used since the fourteenth century, but there is no evidence that they were used in earlier
times for real or symbolically. Some pirates were known to have pictures of hourglasses on their flags as a reminder of our mortality. In England, hourglasses were sometimes placed in coffins before burial. They have also been used as a timepiece on ships.

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