Secrets and Lies (17 page)

Maura O' Donnell put the finishing touches to her cleaning of the Victoria brass fender and fire-irons that she'd found abandoned in Previously Loved, the charity shop where she occasionally volunteered. Maura loved working at the shop. It was a welcome escape from the stresses and strains of her life as a nurse. She enjoyed nothing more than opening the front door of the shop and listening to the tinkling of the bell. Two elderly ladies, Maggie Riordan and Orla Shaughnessy, ran the shop and they were glad of Maura's help and exuberance. Maura appreciated their company in return. She'd always had great respect and interest in people who were older than her, whose life experiences and stories never failed to fascinate her so she was a captive audience to Maggie and Orla's many tales of their youth.

Maura never ceased to be amazed by the treasures that people gave away to Previously Loved.

“How can people give away such beautiful, timeless possessions?” Maura would ask in wonder. “These would easily make five hundred euro at auction.” She held up two brass fire irons for Orla and Maggie to inspect.

“They're just junk to most people and would be thrown on the scrap heap. What's that old saying? “One man's rubbish is another man's treasure”,” Orla responded.

“A treasure indeed,” Maura held her latest discoveries aloft and admired their detail.

She had discovered many treasures during her years working in the charity shop and the brass fender and fire irons were her latest finds. She couldn't wait to show her sister who she knew would be ecstatic at the latest wonderful addition to her living room.

Maura had never failed to be astounded at the amazing job her sister had done with Ballycotton House. She would never have imagined that Kerry would have had the patience and wherewithal to achieve what she had achieved with the old place. The house had been transformed under Kerry's careful work. Conor didn't have much time to maintain the house anymore because he was away so much on business. The house had started off as a joint project for the two of them but Conor's interest had been diverted over the years whereas Kerry was still lovingly obsessed with the old place.

Ballycotton House was unrecognisable now to the wreck that it had been more than twenty years previously. Kerry sometimes joked that Jerome Fitzsimons would have been awe-struck to see the improvements to his once beloved home and Maura agreed that he would be very impressed indeed. Kerry agonised for hours over every single new piece of furniture that she introduced. She'd spent months online and at auctions trying to source the perfect dining room table and had eventually settled on a rustic oak model which complemented the room perfectly.

“It's like a fantasy,” Maura twirled around the sumptuous living room, soaking up the atmosphere and character. She could almost hear the parties and voices of the many people who she imagined visited but were ghosts now.

“I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would own a house like this,” Kerry said.

“You did well for yourself, sis, that's for sure,” Maura agreed.

It pained Kerry to hear the envy in her sister's voice. She realised that Maura did her best to disguise it but she knew her sister too well not to know what she was truly feeling. Kerry always went out of her way to include her sister in her plans for the house and Maura happily gave her opinion on everything.

“How's your love life anyway?” Kerry asked, once she'd finally finished deliberating over the perfect position for the fire irons. She stood back to admire them.

“Nobody special,” was Maura's dismissive response.

Maura had had a few dalliances with men, but unusually for her who was so open about most aspects of her life, in recent years she had resolutely refused to discuss the details of her love life, not even with Kerry. Her sister often wondered why she insisted on being so mysterious and what she was hiding.

The problem with Maura was that with the passing of the years, she had grown afraid of giving her heart away. She got on very well with men and had many male friends that were strictly platonic but she had always found it difficult to let go and get close to one person. There had been no shortage of male admirers and over the years she had had many offers, but there had been very few who she would have regarded as special.

Maura was also blissfully unaware of the effect she had on men. Most men were enthralled by her easy, infectious laugh, her obvious physical beauty and the warmth and inner kindness that emanated from her.

Dermot Desmond, her bank manager, had harboured a love in his heart for her for as long as he could remember but she laughingly brushed away his advances. Maura felt an unexpected stirring of attraction to Dermot deep within herself but she refused to allow herself to give into it, preferring instead the predictable safety of her own company and that of her female friends. Dermot was a short, attractive man with a shock of bright red curly hair that he wore a little too long by the bank's standards, but Dermot didn't care; it was his one act of rebellion he confided conspiratorially to Maura, who laughed uproariously at their little secret.

He had a particular way of listening to her and looking directly and unwaveringly into her eyes that that she found quite beguiling, in spite of herself. Some men genuinely liked women; men like Dermot Desmond and Conor Darcy. Dermot had laughing, dancing eyes and it had become almost a game with them where he would ask her out and she would pretend to seriously consider his offer but it would always end in her gently declining his advances.

“Whatever is the matter with me?” Dermot would ask.

“Ah, sure you're like the brother I never had and never wanted,” Maura would laughingly respond before flouncing out of the bank, leaving poor Dermot behind, already looking forward to the following Friday when he would have her full attention for a few brief moments again.

Maura dutifully visited her aunt and uncle every week and dreaded the regular lecture that she received from Aunt Aisling about her failure to capture a suitable husband. Aunt Aisling was forever holding up Kerry as an example to be followed and she simply refused to understand that Maura just hadn't met the right man. Her aunt would consider that her work was done when both her nieces were happily married to suitable men.

“Are you sure you're not a lesbian?” her aunt had asked during Maura's last visit home.

Maura had momentarily toyed with the idea of pretending to be a lesbian just to see her aunt's reaction, but something stopped her at the last moment.

“I know you're sleeping with men,” Aunt Aisling said. “I'm a woman of the world, after all. It's such an idiotic way to behave; why on earth would any man want to marry you if they can have you for free, without any commitment or responsibility?”

Maura would just stare at her aunt in mutinous silence and simply shrug her shoulders; much to her aunt's irritation who wanted confirmation if what she was saying was true.

Actually, Maura had slept with very few men, not that she hadn't had plenty of opportunity or offers but sleeping around was something that Maura O' Donnell simply did not do.

One of her earliest sexual encounters had been with a fellow student which she had enjoyed and she'd had a brief liaison with a colleague several years previously. There had been a few drunken episodes with a well-known heart consultant but she hardly remembered their encounters so she assumed that they had not been particularly successful.

Maura wisely thought it best not to reveal any of these details to her aunt.

“Kerry played the game the right way,” Aunt Aisling would often say. “She landed that fine young Conor Darcy at a young age and that wonderful Ballycotton House too.”

“I don't believe that Kerry purposely engineered her relationship with Conor,” Maura would protest. “I'm sure that it was all quite accidental. How could she possibly know that it was going to turn out so well for her?”

“Kerry knew,” Aunt Aisling would reply with conviction. “She always was a clever girl.”

“Kerry and Conor are very much in love,” Maura always tried to stand up for her sister. “There's no way that she could have controlled that!”

“If you say so,” her aunt would say with a dismissive sniff.

Maura went to the bank as usual for her regular Friday morning appointment with Desmond.

The other women who worked at the bank greatly admired her. They envied her cool, casual yet very feminine attire and the way she seemed to float rather than walk into the bank. Her beauty seemed so effortless by comparison to their contrived efforts with too much make-up and overly conservative outfits.

How they longed to exude the free spirit of Maura O' Donnell with her long, flowing hair and pale, unwrinkled makeup-free skin. Some of the women who worked at the bank vaguely thought that she might be attracted to Dermot Desmond but then they would as
k themselves how that could be remotely possible. Dermot was surely the last man who someone as beautiful as Maura O' Donnell would find attractive. He had no ambition to climb the bank ladder and was constantly and happily flouting the bank rules and regulations. He had had many heated discussions with his manager about how he simply could not respect the bank's ethics and obviously his antics were not the way to be promoted. Surely someone like Maura O' Donnell would want a man who was a high-achiever and a big earner. It did strike them as interesting how Maura would usually wait until he was available and she always asked specifically for Dermot if he wasn't behind the desk.

Maura enjoyed the easy, uncomplicated banter that she exchanged with Dermot and very much looked forward to seeing him every Friday afternoon.

“I saw your brother-in-law in here the other day,” Dermot said somewhat conspiratorially to Maura.

“Oh, really?” Maura asked. “I’m sure that must have been
very exciting for you.”

“Yes, I didn't realise that you and your sister were so
very unalike. It's odd, you don't look remotely similar.”

Maura glared at him, wondering where the conversation was headed.

“No, but this woman looked like she was in her late twenties, years younger than you,” Dermot insisted, a suspicious glint in his eye.

“Well, Kerry's al
ways looked young for her age,” Maura retorted. “Anyway, how did you even know that it was my sister and brother-in-law?”

“Oh, I saw a photograph of you with them in the newspaper a while ago. You were at the opening of some fancy restaurant together, that's how I recognised Conor, but Kerry looks entirely different. I suppose some people can look very different in photographs to how they are in person.”

“I see,” Maura tried to keep her voice steady, but she was perturbed to realise the interest that Dermot seemed to have in her personal life and wondered what he was trying to imply about Conor?
It was time to back off
, she scolded herself
. It’s time to stop being so friendly and flirty
.

Maura was tired of searching and hoping for love. She'd all but given up her expectations of ever finding a husband for herself. Men were complicated creatures; jus
t when she thought she had figured them out they suddenly showed her that she still didn't have a clue, even at the ripe old age of forty two.

Maura resented the inquisitive interest of her colleagues and friends when it came to her love life. There was no such thing as a private life in Cork City. It seemed as if everyone was trying to marry her off. Why was it beyond the realms of possibility that she might have a lover or even a string of lovers for all anyone else knew? She was successful and beautiful and everyone said she had a very engaging personality so why not? No, it was socially unacceptable not to be married at her age. She was nothing in anyone's eyes unless she found a husband and had children.

Aunt Aisling was becoming more and more insufferable on the subject. She was forever reminding Maura that she was now in her early forties and with no marriage prospects. Kerry wasn't much help on her quest to find a mate. Her only recommendation was “to be yourself.” Yeah, right, being herself hadn't gotten her a husband yet. It was fine for Kerry with her adoring husband and loving children and altogether perfect life. Maura did envy Kerry's life but she loved her sister too much not to be happy for her at the same time.

“You should sign up for a marriage agency,” was Aunt Aisling's latest shocking suggestion.

“What planet are you on?” Maura glared incredulously at her aunt.

“Why not give it a try? Desperate times call for desperate measures and I've heard of some people having great luck with agencies,” Aunt Aisling insisted. “At least you'd be meeting like-minded men; men who want to settle down and get married just like you.”

“I'd like to have someone special to come home to after work,” Maura reluctantly admitted.“It would be lovely to have someone who was interested in me and who would always be on my side.”

“Exactly, just like your Uncle Sean and me,” Aunt Aisling beamed.

So it was that Maura O' Donnell signed up to Cork's foremost dating agency, Matchmaking Marriages, and waited nervously for her first date with her possible future husband. Maura cringed inwardly when she recalled her first marriage introduction.