Secret Worlds (284 page)

His next words were broken by a scream that cut across the quad.

I ran down the sidewalk toward Turner Hall with Mercer not far behind me. A crowd had formed outside, and everyone was looking up. I stopped and rested my hands on my knees as I panted. Running in the morning heat had sucked away my stamina. Frightened an excited murmurs passed through the crowd. James stood on the ledge of the roof with his face raised to the sky.

“How did that idiot get up there?” I pushed through the crowd toward the side.

“Cassi, wait.” Mercer’s fingertips brushed my wrist, but I pulled away.

I yanked open the door and took the stairs up to the highest floor. The squeak of metal echoed below. I wasn’t the only one driven to action. The door to the roof access was close to the side stairs. The handle wiggled under my grasp, but it wouldn’t budge. I had to find someone with keys.

I turned, my body moving before I had a clear thought on where to go, and my foot twisted out from under me. I tumbled and lay sprawled in the corridor. That’s how Mercer found me when he cleared the top of the stairs.

“Are you all right?” he asked. “Say something.”

“I’m fine.”

I sat up and scanned the hall for my assailant, which turned out to be a mop fallen from the wheeled bucket. Mercer held out his hand, and I grabbed it, pulling myself up.

“Doors locked.” I nodded to the roof access. “We need to find the lazy janitor who left this here.”

He stared at the bucket to the door with narrowed eyes. “He’s probably long gone by now. Let me try the door.”

“What you think you can talk it into opening?”

“See if there’s any professors here who may have a set of keys.”

I turned to go down the hall. Come to think of it, why had no teachers or students come pouring out from the classrooms? They had to have heard all the commotion. Sure it was early, but morning classes were about to begin. I flung open the door of the nearest room and gasped. Students were slumped over their desks. Some had fallen out of their chairs and onto the floor. Snores echoed through the room. The teacher was laid out next to the podium with his lecture papers strewn about him. I took a step back and gritted my teeth.

“Cassi, I got it,” Mercer called.

I took one more glance at the sleeping classes and headed back to him. The daimon had decided to show its hand. I couldn’t let Mercer rush into whatever trap lay upstairs.

Daylight flashed from above as I reached the roof access door. He’d already beaten me. I took the steps two at a time to reach him. My breath was sucked from my lungs as I stepped onto the roof. It was as if a black void had taken a hold of my heart. This was all in vain. Mercer was on his knees with his head bent. I took a couple of steps and collapsed next to him as tears burst from my eyes.

What made me think I could contend with any daimon? I was useless. Aunt Dahlia had never let me forget that little fact while growing up, and Aunt Jo had told me so. Even if I tried, I’d just end up like my mother. She’d been so much more than me.

I choked back a sob and looked up, blinking through the bleariness. James had his back to us as he looked down at the people below.

“James,” I croaked out. “What are you doing?”

He turned in our direction and stared with wide, red-rimmed eyes. His hair was a tangled mess, which was a feat since he kept it short in the first place, and his cheeks held a sallow quality. The wrinkled shirt and jeans was the same as I saw him wearing on Monday. He closed his gape of surprise and gave me a sad smile.

“I’m ending the pain,” he said.

“Why?”

He laughed. “You should already know that. I’m worthless.”

“No one is worthless,” Mercer ground out. “You’re not thinking straight, James. How about you come downstairs and we can talk.”

“What would you know?” James sneered. “You’re gifted … You’re—”

“This isn’t about me,” Mercer said.

“He’s right, James, you’re not worthless.” My voice sounded hollow, even to me. How could I be convincing with this emptiness filling me?

His gaze snapped back to me. “You of all people know that’s a lie. I mean, you left me.”

“You cheated on me.”

Great, Cassi. Let’s bring up the bad parts.

“Right,” he said. “You see what a piece of shit I am? I don’t deserve to live.”

“Just because we weren’t a good fit doesn’t mean you should die,” I said.

“Why shouldn’t I? I’m doomed for a life of mediocrity,” he said. “We all are chained to Fate.”

My mouth went dry. “I can make my own choices.”

“But here we are,” James said. “You’ve fallen onto this path despite trying to avoid it.”

I frowned. “Wait … what?”

He held his hand out to me. “There’s one definite escape.”

“Cassi, don’t,” Mercer said.

I swallowed hard and stared at the ground. He didn’t need to worry. I was too much of a coward. Death was one of the reasons I ran in the first place. Even though I claimed that I wanted to live my life on my own terms, I mostly wanted to live.

“Killing yourself doesn’t solve anything,” I said. “If you want to be better, you have to make yourself better.”

He laughed bitterly. “With people like you and Serenity, or him.” He pointed at Mercer. “That’s all but impossible.”

“I gave you an opportunity,” Mercer said through gritted teeth.

“That was a sham to make you and yours look better,” James said. “But I should thank you. You showed me how doomed I really was. Now, I can save myself a lifetime of misery.”

He threw himself backward, and his eyes closed with an almost peaceful look. With a scream, I lunged for him, but the distance between us was too great. He disappeared, and the screams from below mixed with my own.

The hours following James’s death passed in a blur. At some point, the police arrived and I was pulled into an empty classroom for what seemed like endless questions. Yes, I had noticed James had seemed a little depressed a few days ago. No, I didn’t think he was capable of doing something like this.

I found myself sitting in front of the door to my aunt’s hotel room with the cooler resting in front of me. My car was parked a few feet away, so I’d driven here. The sun was high in the sky when Aunt Jo rolled up. She stared at me with her lips pressed in a thin line as I slowly stood. I followed her inside and plopped the cooler on the table. The water sloshed around inside. I stared down at the table with my back stiff.

“You know?” I asked.

She snorted. “Course I know. It’s all over the news.”

I sank in the nearby chair and buried my face in my hands. “I couldn’t stop him.”

“Ya can’t even unblock yerself. What were ya expectin’?”

I shook my head, still hidden on my hands. What had I expected when I raced to the roof? James and I weren’t even close to resembling anything like friends. I should have found someone to help instead. Though, they couldn’t have handled the aura that permeated the air up there.

“This is why I been tellin’ ya to prepare. Yer all but useless,” Aunt Jo said. “What’s in the cooler?”

“A piece of whatever was stalking me this morning.”

Aunt Jo pulled the dripping baggie out and examined it with a wrinkled nose. “Did ya pull this off?”

“I found it in some bushes. Whatever this is, it’s in a dead body,” I said. “Whose is it?”

She raised an eyebrow. “What makes ya think I know?”

“The hair is red.”

“Lots of people got red hair.”

“But we have it specifically. You said that some of the others had been attacked. Maybe one of them got taken.”

Aunt Jo sighed. “No knowin’ that.”

Flames burst from her hand and consumed the baggie. I gagged at the stench of burnt plastic, hair, and flesh. Her gaze remained narrowed on mine, and she wheeled closer to me.

“It doesn’t matter who the daimon is wearing,” Aunt Jo said. “Ya can’t take it on like this. We’re gonna have to force out that blockage, even if it takes all night.”

She grabbed my wrist with her thumb resting on the tattoo and twisted my arm so the elbow came in. I slipped from the chair and was forced to my knees. She placed her forefinger, middle finger, and thumb on my crown. Heat and pressure built up in my head, and lights of orange and red flashed before my eyes. I bit back a cry and balled my hands into fists.

“That’s it,” Aunt Jo’s voice sounded far away. “Yer a strong girl. This should be nothin’.”

Endure, my mother had said, but how long had she? She’d been gone for weeks on that last mission. Every day, I waited on the porch after school until the sun had disappeared. Then Aunt Jo would pull me in, claiming that the wolves would get me, not that there were any wolves close to where we lived. Still, I would sit in my little alcove window and stare out of our driveway, just waiting. The night she’d come home, I’d raced down the stairs in my nightgown and flung open the door.

My wrist was burning where’ Aunt Jo’s fingers touched me. I went limp with only her hand to hold me up. The strobe continued to flash in my eyelids and it felt as if my head was going to explode.

“Keep fightin’ Cassi girl. We’re gettin’ somewhere.” Aunt Jo’s voice floated from somewhere around me.

My mother had stood on the edge of the light when I flung open the door. I’d wanted to run into her open arms, but the burning on my wrist had kept me clinging to the doorframe.
Come to me
, her voice echoed eerily in the night. I took two steps forward before Aunt Jo yanked me back into the house. She stepped in front and spread her arms wide, blocking my view. A high pitched laugher shot through the night. Aunt Jo seized up, twisted her back to the side, and went flying off the porch and into the darkness. My mother stepped forward with a grin on her face and her eyes glowing a pale yellow. Some silent wind had sent her hair flying around her.

I squeezed my eyes shut, and tears ran down my cheeks. Something in my head broke, shifted, and dissipated away through my crown. Still the pressure remained. I pulled at my bonds, but Aunt Jo’s hands held tight.

“Enough,” I cried. “Let me go.”

“Not when we’re so close,” she yelled. “Whatever this is, ya need to face it.”

My mother had opened her arms again.
Come to me and we can go far away.
I whimpered with my heart pounding in my chest. Something wore my mother’s face, but it wasn’t her. That smile held no warmth. The night lit up with fire, and it hit my mother full on in the side. She screamed, and I with her, as she stumbled out of the porch light. The flaming figure had streaked away through the dark until it had become a speck in the distance. That was the last time I had seen her.

The buildup in my head exploded. It felt as if something heavy and dark passed through my crown. There was too much, and it traveled down to exit through my brow. I yanked myself from Aunt Jo’s grip and fell backwards. Millions of pins and needles raced across my skin, and my wrist burned as if it was on fire. Even the sweat on my face seemed to steam. I panted and blinked as the room came back into to focus. A small raised patch of skin in the shape of a thumb marred the tattoo. I sat up and nearly fell backward again as a dizzy headache settled in my brain. I braced myself with one hand and gave Aunt Jo a bleary-eyed glare.

“You burned me,” I said.

“Needed to,” she said. “And it worked. Ya should be feelin’ things like normal soon. It’ll heal.”

I shakily pulled myself to my feet and headed to the door.

“Where ya goin’?” she asked.

“Away from you.” I slammed the door behind me.

I drove down several streets with no idea on where I wanted to go. My chest squeezed, and I wiped the tears from my eyes. Even though she meant it to be for the best, Aunt Jo could be a real bitch sometimes. I’d kept that night buried for years, only having to face it on the lonely nights. I snorted and shook my head. Poor little me, all alone in the world. Aunt Jo had suffered that night, too. She’d lost her ability to walk.

I parked my car in front of the coffee shop and stared at it blankly for a few moments before reaching in my glove compartment. Beneath the pile of old insurance cards and oil change receipts lay my mini first aid kit. I slathered burn salve all over my tattoo and wrapped it with gauze and tape. The burn had subsided into an annoying sting mixed with a tingle.

Unfortunately, fire didn’t heal the body. It consumed. The only way we could heal would be if we absorbed a god or daimon with that ability. Of course, that made it easier for them to take over.

I leaned my head against the window of the car and closed my eyes with a sigh. The pounding in my head had disappeared during the drive. The prickling had traveled up my arm, and my pulse raced in my ears. Aunt Jo had done more than open me up. She’d given me some of her own resonance. Better than coffee.

The way this day had gone, I should have headed home, spiked myself with sleeping pills, and slept until morning, but it wouldn’t have worked. I would have been tossing and turning, alone with my memories all night long. Instead, I would find someone to run the night with, drinking, talking, and laughing until we found our way to his bed where his warm body could comfort me.

A strong tap on my window caused me to jump. Mercer was leaned over, peering at me with his eyebrows drawn together. Perfect. All reservations I had this morning flew from my mind as I rolled down the window.

Mercer knelt by the window and frowned at me. “Where have you been? Serenity and I have been looking all over for you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You stopped fighting?”

“She’s pretty worried about you. She’s been trying to call you all afternoon.”

I glanced at the black screen of my phone. “I must have turned it off.”

I pushed it the button on the side, let it power on, and sent a quick text to Serenity. Knowing her, she was wearing down our carpet by pacing, though I didn’t think she would be worried enough to call Mercer. I glanced back at him and gave him a sly smile.

“Looks like I’m the reason she’s talking to you,” I said.

He ran a hand through his hair and gave a soft chuckle. “Unbelievable.”