Secret Love (11 page)

She paused to wipe away the tears welling in her eyes before continuing. “You represent all that’s good. You are everything a man should be—honorable, respected, admired and loved. And you take your responsibilities seriously. The same would hold true with your responsibilities as a husband. And doing that can destroy you, and I refuse to let that happen. I love you, too much.”

Her gaze became more intense. “My life is everyday news, Jacob, and if you married me yours will be, too. I can’t let that happen to you. I won’t let that happen. I won’t let the media rip apart your world. Whispering Pines is your world, it’s who you are. If we were to marry, this place would become a circus. Life as you know it wouldn’t be the same. There would be reporters constantly trying to get on your land to
filter out a story, there would be helicopters flying around overhead to get pictures, any word you say might end up being misquoted in some tabloid or another. Your life, Jacob, would become a living hell. I love you, too much to let that happen.”

Jake looked at her, feeling more love for her at that very moment than he thought was possible. “Fine. I hear what you’re saying, but I still want to marry you,” he said softly. “You don’t have to protect me, Diamond. I can handle all those things you’ve mentioned. With you by my side, I’ll be able to handle just about anything.”

“But that’s just it, Jacob, I won’t be here by your side most of the time. I’ll have to travel, and at times I’ll be gone for long periods of time while filming.”

“I know that, and I can handle that. But no matter where you go, you’ll know Whispering Pines is your home and that I’ll be here waiting for you. Waiting for the day you will return so that I can take care of you, ease your stress and give you the loving care you deserve and need from the rat race of your career.”

Diamond shook her head. “The price you’d pay isn’t worth loving me, Jacob.”

“Any price I pay for loving you, Diamond, would be worth it.”

Diamond began to cry, and Jake reached for her and pulled her down into his arms. He held her. He knew her fears and even understood them. He’d been friends with Sterling long enough to know how relentless and cruel the media could be sometimes.

She cried harder, and he held her tighter, comforting her and whispering words that things would be all right because they had love on their side, and their love would be enough.

Diamond struggled out of Jake’s arms and looked up at him. Her gaze was pleading. “But our love
won’t
be enough.”

Jake looked at her, caught by her distress and determination to sacrifice their love to protect him. “So there is no way you’ll agree to marry me?” he asked, his voice tight. No matter what, he refused to give up.

Maybe it was the way he asked the question, with deep and intense emotions, or the heart-wrenching thought that once she left Whispering Pines she would never see him again that made Diamond finally say in a subdued voice, “Yes, there is a way. And it’s the only way I will agree to,” she said, her voice raw from emotions.

“And what way is that?”

“If we marry secretly, at least for a short while. Then the media won’t know.”

Looking at her, Jake knew she was serious. Did she actually think they could keep their marriage a secret? And if he went along with it, just how long were they talking about? “For how long, Diamond? How long would you want to keep our marriage a secret?”

Discomfited by his question, she shrugged before saying, “I don’t know, Jacob. Probably for no more than a year.”

After a long, tense silence he asked, “Then what? What happens after a year? You’ll still be in the spotlight. What’s so magical about one year?”

Diamond shrugged. “Nothing really other than it will give us a year to ourselves. I’m not ready to share our love with the prying eyes of the world. I’m not ready for what we share to be analyzed, criticized and pulled apart by the press. I need some private time,
Jacob, to be with you whenever I can without people looking in.”

Jake got out of bed and crossed the room to the huge window. Staring out, all he saw was darkness. It would be a mirror of how his life would look if Diamond walked out of it.

He turned back to her. “And what if you’re pregnant now?”

There was a long pause in the room. A part of him hoped she was, but the tense bunching of her brows indicated she was hoping she wasn’t.

She smiled faintly. “If I’m pregnant, then it won’t be a secret for long, will it?”

She rubbed one hand over her forearm, knowing that he was thinking hard on her proposal. After moments passed and he didn’t say anything, she felt compelled to ask, “What about it, Jacob?”

Jake sucked in a deep breath, wondering what choice did he have. He loved her and would continue to do so until the day he died. He walked back over to the bed and pulled her into his arms. “I love you, Diamond, and I’m willing to take you any way I can get you.”

She wrapped her arms around him. “Do you mean that, Jacob?”

“Yes, I mean it.”

He pulled her back into his arms and kissed her like a man who had finally found what had been missing in his life. He would love her and protect her and in time she would see that their love would truly be enough.

J
ake Madaris rubbed the back of his neck and looked anxiously up at the dark sky. He had been at the airstrip for more than an hour and there was no sign of Sterling’s plane. He drew in a deep, ragged breath and let it out slowly as he tried to remain calm. Sterling claimed Diamond was all right, but he would breathe a whole lot easier once he saw her for himself; once he held her in his arms.

Someone had tried to attack her!
He nearly choked on his disbelief that some demented person had actually broken into Diamond’s home and tried to hurt her. Oh, she’d had to deal with overzealous fans in the past, but nothing of this magnitude had ever happened, and he intended that nothing like this would ever happen again.

Damn it. They were only supposed to keep their
secret for a year, but here it was nearly eighteen months later, and still very few people knew they were married. Jake searched his mind frantically to recall just how things had gotten so out of hand. Why had he allowed things to go this far? He sighed, knowing the answer to that question without really thinking about it. He had not asked her to give up anything to become his wife because he knew all about Diamond’s dreams.

He of all people understood how it felt to want something so badly that you worked hard to achieve it. He of all people knew the importance of proving something to yourself as well as to others. He understood Diamond’s burning desire to reach the top. She was a good actress. As far as he was concerned, the whole world knew it, but still she had not reached that pinnacle of excellence where she was satisfied.

Instinctively as her lover, husband and friend, he knew what drove her to want to be the best and not live under her father’s shadow. He also knew just how much she loved being an actress. There was no way he could take away from her the only other thing that shared her love. She loved acting as much as he loved ranching.

He also understood her fears.

She was still fearful of how pulled apart and complicated their life together would become once the media found out about them. And she was fighting to protect their privacy. He didn’t care what the media found out. He wanted to stop hiding the truth about their marriage and make her realize that together they could handle the media. And although a part of him wanted to push her into finally making a decision about their future, he
couldn’t. He would continue to do what he’d always done whenever she showed up at Whispering Pines. He would be her calm after the storm, her haven of protection, her rock of strength and her biggest supporter. And most importantly, he would continue to be the man who loved her.

He had long ago accepted the fact that the two of them would not have a normal marriage. He had gotten used to her drop-in visits, their secret rendezvous and their clandestine hideaways filled with stolen passionate moments. What he hadn’t liked was keeping the news of his marriage from his family. Only one of his brothers knew the truth, and that had been by accident when Jonathan and his wife Marilyn had dropped by the ranch unexpectedly during one of Diamond’s visits.

He knew other family members were worried and concerned that he was acting strangely by not spending time with the family like he used to. He had missed a couple of the family gatherings, which in the past had been so unlike him. What they didn’t know was the reason he’d been absent was because he’d been somewhere having a secret illicit affair with his wife. In the beginning, he had enjoyed the thrill of outsmarting the media, who assumed Diamond and Sterling were an item. Now even that had changed.

As hard as it was to believe, Sterling, who had been a devout bachelor, had gotten married eight months ago, and he and his wife were expecting their first child. Therefore Sterling could no longer be used as Diamond’s pretend lover, which had only put the media in a frenzy to discover and disclose the identity of her new love interest. News coverage on Diamond
was worse than it had ever been before. The media were completely stumped as to how Colby, Sterling’s wife, could become such close friends with Diamond, whom everyone assumed was Sterling’s former lover. Jake shook his head at the madness.

Jake lifted his face to the sky when he heard the hum of an aircraft. In those few scant seconds of sound, a shudder rippled down his spine and he drew in a deep breath.

His wife, the love of his life, was home.

Diamond’s heart squeezed inside her chest when she saw the first fragments of land. She put her face to the plane’s window to peer out into the predawn sky as a clearer picture came into view.

Whispering Pines.

No matter how many times she returned, she always felt a deep connection to this place. It was here that she had found true everlasting love with a man who meant everything to her.

Jacob.

She wanted to forget about everything except Jacob and Whispering Pines. She didn’t want to remember the insane young man who thought himself obsessively in love with her and had broken into her home only to get violent when she had tried getting away from him. She didn’t want to think of the police’s questions or the mob of reporters who had shown up after hearing about the incident.

She wanted to forget everything except for the man she loved and the land she considered as home. Easing back in her seat, a calming peace settled over her. She was home, and she knew without a doubt that when
the plane landed, Jacob would be there at the airstrip, waiting for her.

Just like he had that very first time.

Jake could see the silhouette of Sterling’s plane in the predawn sky. Then he watched it land. He held his breath when the aircraft came to a stop. Moments later the door opened and Diamond came out onto the top step. She saw him and across the distance their gazes met and locked. He watched as she drew a deep breath before proceeding down the steps. Her hands were tucked into the pockets of her jacket to ward off the mid-February chill. She had cut her hair for the movie she’d just finished filming. The short, curly strands covered her head like a black cap, and made the beauty of her facial features even more blatant.

He walked toward her, feeling more love for this woman than she would ever know. He met up with her when she planted her feet firmly on solid ground, the earth of Whispering Pines. When he stood in front of her, he looked at her closely, trying to detect any physical sign of harm. He reached out and tenderly ran one finger along her cheek.

“Are you all right, or do I have to go to California and hurt somebody?” he asked in a low voice and a tone that was dead serious. Diamond studied his features as closely as he was studying hers. She saw his strain, his exhaustion and his worry. She had told herself that she would not cry when she saw him; had even convinced herself that she would not break down. Now she was fighting desperately not to do both.

“No,” she answered softly, in a shaky voice. “He was just a kid, Jacob, barely eighteen.”

Jake shrugged broad shoulders, his gaze never leaving hers. “Doesn’t matter. He had the nerve to mess with my woman, my wife. And I don’t like it. I don’t like it one hell of a bit.”

Diamond nodded. She forced a faint smile to her face. “Neither do I, but it’s over. I survived the ordeal and I’m home with my man, my husband.”

Jake stared at her for the space of several heartbeats before leaning down and capturing Diamond’s mouth in his. Exerting more pressure he deepened the kiss, mating their mouths, letting loose their strained emotions and their unrestrained passion. Diamond’s light floral scent drifted to him, filling his mind with all the reasons why he loved her, and just how empty and lonely he felt whenever she was away. Thoughts of her fueled his dreams at night and made him rock-hard at some of the oddest times of the day. Memories of her taste, her touch and passion were things that helped him to survive life without her until she returned. He didn’t think there would ever be a time in his life when he wouldn’t want her completely.

Jake released Diamond’s mouth momentarily to allow air to stagger into their lungs before claiming her mouth once again.

All Diamond could think about was the man kissing her, and the long, lonely weeks they had been apart. The feel of his strong arms around her made her feel safe, protected, but most of all, loved. She used every ounce of her concentration on their kiss, becoming lost in it and wishing it could go on forever.

Jake reluctantly broke off the kiss when he heard the sound of riders and horses approaching. Evidently his
men, who were early risers, had gotten wind of what had happened to Diamond on the early morning news. After finding him missing from the ranch, they had put two and two together and had decided to seek him out at the airstrip.

A lump formed in Jake’s throat, knowing how much his men cared for his wife. She was no longer a celebrity to them. She was their friend and they were her protectors. All of them were committed to keeping their secret.

Jake saw Diamond look over her shoulder and knew she was deeply touched by the men’s show of force and support as all thirty of them filed in a single line on the horizon. When she looked back at him, he saw the tears forming in her eyes.

“It’s so good to be home, Jacob. I missed you.”

He swung her up into his arms and began walking toward his Jeep. “And it’s good having you home, sweetheart. I missed you, too.”

Diamond fell asleep as soon as Jake helped her undress and get into the bed. He had cursed under his breath and clenched his fists when he had seen the bruise that ran along her shoulder. Although she had explained it had come from her own doing when she had fallen in an attempt to get away from the intruder, that had not soothed Jake’s anger.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to worry about me, Jacob,” she’d said quietly before drifting off to sleep.

I’m sorry, too,
he had wanted to say to her. He was sorry that he had not been there to protect her. And as much as he knew that his absence couldn’t be helped, he felt the blame just the same.

He stood at his bedroom window and looked out, staring over the land. Whispering Pines had always been his pride, his joy, his motivator. The promise he had made to his family had assured his drive to succeed and to take care of the land that had been entrusted to him.

Jake turned away from the window and glanced across the room and watched Diamond sleep. She was safe. But for how long? When would another overzealous fan hurt her? Feeling disgusted at the thought and with himself, he rubbed a palm across his face, thinking once again that he should have been there to protect his wife.

Feeling he had failed her and that he would continue to fail her as long as their secret stood in the way, Jake walked out of the room.

“Where do you think he is, Blaylock?” Diamond asked as she paced the kitchen floor. She had awakened midmorning to find Jacob wasn’t there. And he had not returned for lunch with the rest of his men.

“The boy got a lot on his mind. He’ll be fine. There are things he needs to work out, Diamond.”

Diamond gazed over at the older man curiously. “What things?”

Blaylock shrugged. “Things that aren’t any of my business.”

Diamond walked over to where Blaylock stood, stirring ingredients into a huge pot as he prepared dinner. She laid a hand on his arm. “Blaylock, everything that happens around here is your business. So please tell me what’s going on with Jacob.”

Blaylock stared for a long moment at the intense
plea in her eyes before saying, “The boy is blaming himself for what happened to you in California.”

Diamond lifted a bemused brow. “Why would Jacob blame himself? He wasn’t even there.”

“And that’s what’s eating at him, girl. As your husband, he feels he should have been there to protect you, and he wasn’t.”

She frowned. She hadn’t thought Jacob would feel that way. “But he couldn’t be there with me. He knows we have to be discreet to keep the secret safe. He—”

Blaylock waved his hand to halt her words. “Maybe that’s what’s causing the problem, this secret of yours. Think about it for a minute. A man, a real man, would want to protect what’s his, and Jake feels that when it comes to you, he can’t do that.”

Diamond looked at Blaylock, assessing and weighing everything he had just told her. “Did Jacob tell you this?”

“He didn’t have to. I’m a man. Besides, I know how Jake thinks. This pretend marriage of yours is finally getting to him.”

“It’s not a pretend marriage,” Diamond defended, raising her chin. “We have a real marriage.”

Blaylock lifted a brow. “By whose definition? Definitely not by most people’s. Think about it, Diamond. Then think about the kind of man Jake is. He’s had to make a lot of adjustments to keep your secret. And he’s had to make a lot of sacrifices. He and his family have always been close, but he rarely invites them here for extended visits since he’s never sure when you might drop in.”

Diamond looked at him, taken aback. She knew how close Jake and his family were. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

Blaylock gave a rueful shrug. “Figured you hadn’t.”

A quick stab of pain pierced Diamond’s heart. “I only wanted to protect him from the ugliness of my career,” she said quietly. “I didn’t want his privacy invaded.”

“I know, but what you failed to consider is that when two people marry they accept it all, the good, the bad and the ugly. Trust me. Jake can handle a bunch of annoying reporters.”

“But I wanted to spare him that. I didn’t want our love exploited. Nor did I want his family subjected to anything either.”

“Both Jake and the Madaris family can handle their own. When you married Jake, you also married into his family. They’re a family that you have denied yourself the chance to get to know. They are a good group of people who’ll welcome you with open arms and who’ll stand by you and Jake, no matter what.”

Diamond bit her lip. “Oh, Blaylock, I never stopped to consider any of this. I’ve never been a part of a real family before. I think of you and the men as my family, but that’s as far as I’ve allowed myself to take it.”