Second Ride Cowboy (Second Chance Series) (14 page)

“Love is never easy or free. It always has a price.”

“We don’t always have to wear the weight of the world on our shoulders. It’s okay to live for the moment. To allow tomorrow to be what it will be.”

****

Lila’s words sank into Duke like a life jacket. All he had to do was reach for it.

Duke watched Lila step back, taking his hand into her own. Her skin was so soft against his calloused fingers. She was beautiful. Her eyes shone like diamonds and excited his soul. Her long hair hung down over her shoulders and her nipples were hard against the soft material of her gown. The outline of the pert pink buds and firm mounds beckoned him, and every time he looked at her, it felt like the first time. His heart had been crippled before he’d met her, and she’d lifted him into happiness.

His doubts swirled around in his mind, beading like lights of realization. Could he bring her joy? He’d struggled with that question for many years. Each time they drew closer to the rainbow, the storm swept them away into the dark abyss. The rage tugged at him now. Could it be possible that he loved her so deeply he cared only for her happiness and well-being?

“Come, Duke. Tonight I am yours.” Lila’s voice was like a beam of light. She was stronger

than the arms of the hurricane.

He followed her to the desk. She let go of his hand. He concentrated on her every movement as she lifted herself onto the edge of the desk, sleek as she slid across its smoothness. Moving her fingers to the hem of her gown, she lifted it high on her waist. Desire exploded into every available space in his body, crying for freedom. Smoothing his hand from her slender ankle, up along the curve of her silken leg to the firm soft skin of her inner thigh, he held her molten gaze as he drank in her loveliness. Her scent filled his nostrils as his pants stretched with need. Sliding his palm over her hip, he said, “I just want to do better than I did the last time.”

Grabbing the waist of her panties, he dragged them down her legs and slipped them into his front pocket. Her eyes widened in delight while her lips curved into a perfect naughty smile. And how the hell could he resist this? He was a goner when it came to Lila.

She opened her legs wider, revealing her moist pink folds. “I want you, Duke.” Her whispered demand was enough to send tingles across every nerve ending.

With both hands on her thighs, he pushed her further onto the desk and laid her back. Her hair hung over the edge like a satin cover and her back arched. She belonged on the cover of a romance novel. “You’re beautiful, Lila.” He lowered his mouth and she lifted her hips to meet him.

Sliding his tongue along her silken dampness, her sweet taste intoxicated him. He suckled her clit until she dug her fingernails of one hand into his skin and entwined her fingers into his hair with the other, like a cowgirl rides a bull. Her hips bucked as deep moans vibrated her body, and when she quivered against his lips, he knew she was close. He licked and rolled his mouth over her and inside her, then she called his name.

“I’m here, baby,” he said against her skin.

“I’m…I’m…”

“I know, love. Let it come.” One long groan and she twisted. He held her hips to keep her from sliding away from him. When she stopped thrusting, he practically tore off his pants and boxers. He lifted his cock into his hand and gave it two pumps. The muscle was taut. “Touch me, Lila.”

She lifted her body and reached for him. Her slender hand wrapped around his length as she stroked him in rhythm. He gently removed her hand, grabbed her hips and drove himself deep inside her. His tip throbbed for release.

He wasn’t ready just yet.

Pulling out of her, she looked up at him like he’d committed a crime. “Come here, love.” He helped her off the desk, bent her over the edge and lifted her gown high up on her shoulders. He guided himself inside her wet core again. She moaned and circled her ass, drawing his cock deeper inside. He ran his palms along her back, feeling her muscles tighten under his touch. Reaching around, he pulled the material away from her breasts, hearing threads rip in his haste. Cupping the full mounds in his palms, he rubbed her hard nipples. With each thrust, he grew closer to explosion. Flames licked at him, daring him to fall into its madness. With one last deep plunge, he emptied inside her.

Time passed.

Duke didn’t want to move, not wanting the bliss to end, but the desk was getting harder as they lay there. When he felt her squirm, he knew he was getting heavy with his arm swung over her. Pulling back, he shivered at the sudden cold chill. He watched her slide off the desk and cover herself with the material of the ripped gown. “I hope it’s not your favorite.” He nodded at

the torn satin.

“It is now.” She winked as she tried finger combing her hair. Her cheeks were crimson, her eyes bright and her lips red. Her chest rose up and down—sexy as hell. She looked like a devil’s mistress, and he didn’t mind one bit.

“That was amazing,” he said. After what they’d shared, he had enough confidence to climb a mountain. Getting off the desk, he reached for his pants, slid into them, leaving them unbuttoned. “I bought a horse. A beautiful stallion,” he said.

“You did?” She smiled. “A horse? You must be feeling better. I’m glad.”

 “I bought him for Ava.”

“She’s a bit young for a horse don’t you think?” One brow lifted.

He hadn’t forgotten that Lila wasn’t the horse-type, or ranch-type either.

His legs were still a bit shaky and he sat down on the couch. “You have a dislike for horses, Lila. There’s no reason for her to feel the same. I want her to love this place, like I do. A child is never too young to appreciate a ranch like this.”

“I don’t dislike horses.” She sighed. “And of course she’ll love it here. Why wouldn’t she? She’ll come and visit often.”

His breath caught. “Visit?”

Her tongue came out and moistened her bottom lip. “How long can we live together like we are, Duke? The connection remains, yet I think we both can agree we aren’t like we were before the accident.”

“I thought we did pretty well together.”

“I’m not talking sex. If that’s all it took to have a great relationship, we’d be perfect.”

An ache spread through his chest and his bloated ego diminished. “This is Ava’s home. Those were your words, remember?”

“It has been her home, and always will be. It’s just not mine.” Lila remained standing, her arms crossed over her chest. “Carly and Chance offered me the cottage at Swift Wind. Ava and I will be moving in at the end of the month. She’ll still be close, just not here.”

“Why are you saying this? Ava belongs here.”

She blinked. “I’m hurt that in your statement you didn’t include me, but I’m not surprised. I’m more certain than ever you have one foot in and one foot out,” she said.

“Don’t twist my words. I meant living here, as a family, is what’s best for our child.”

Her shoulders slumped. “And we live as co-parents? Making love when the need arises, but sleep in separate rooms? What lifestyle is this? I’d say that’s confusing more than healthy.”

How had things gone from cozy to shit in a matter of seconds? “You told me once you weren’t sure you could live on a ranch. Maybe you’re not certain you could be happy here long-term.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Sure, go ahead and turn this around. No one forced me to come here to live. I made that choice.” He kept his eyes on her as she picked up items from the floor that belonged on his desk. She lined everything neatly. “And why are we discussing this now? Stallions, the future and who doesn’t want to live where. Truth is, everyone looks sweeter after an orgasm.”

“I’m not saying this because I’m in some sex-induced haze. Maybe Ava deserves a mom and dad who are married.” Had he just said those words? Damn…he had. And he’d meant them.

 Several emotions flitted across her face before her nose crinkled. “Your timing stinks.”

“I’ve been told that a time or two.” Communication had always been a bitch for him.

“And you didn’t think you should work on the timing problem?” She tossed him a heated glare that could have fried an egg.

He stretched his legs, rubbing his aching knee. “So are you going to answer?”

She stopped fidgeting and turned to him. “Did having sex open up all the doors to your self-conscious?”

“Still skirting the issue,” he said.

“I can tell you I’ll never be a rancher. I’ll never milk the cows and brush the horses.”

“That’s a crime,” he teased. He knew she was a city girl. That fact hadn’t bothered him before the accident, and it certainly didn’t bother him now.

“Have you seen my panties?” She darted a glance around the office, she lifted couch pillows, and checked on the bookshelf.

“Lila? Panties later. Question now.” Yeah, he knew he should tell her where she could find her lost clothing, but she was sidetracked, and he needed to know how she felt.

Sitting down next to him on the couch, she looked at him and said, “I’ve waited over six years for you to ask me to marry you. I never dreamed that when you finally did, you’d use our daughter as the reason. I’d hoped it’d be for love.”

Damn! He’d screwed up. “You’re right. It wasn’t what I’d expected to say.” He wished he’d think before he spoke.

She nodded. “No surprise.”

He didn’t need her exasperated expression to help him realize he sounded like an asshole. Even he had to ask himself what in the hell was wrong with his brain? He’d just made love to a beautiful woman. Not just any woman, but the mother of his child, and he couldn’t bask in the bliss a bit longer before he started throwing out dead fish from the water. He was on a one-way path to destruction. “I’d be angry, but how can I be upset with you when you’re only telling the truth?” She stood up and started for the door. When she stopped and looked at him, he could see the torment in her eyes and the harsh set of her jaw. “I’m tired of fighting. I’m too tired to convince you that you’re a lucky bastard for being alive. While you’re at it, keep your obligatory marriage proposals to yourself.”

“So, was this a goodbye?” He nodded at the desk.

“I wouldn’t call it a goodbye as much as I would say it was two people enjoying one another. At least I’m giving you common courtesy of telling you I have plans to move. Unlike the note you left me on the nightstand six years ago.”

“That’s unfair. That’s in the past and I’ve apologized,” he said.

“No, it’s very fair. You never did tell me why you’d broken up with me. I’m a little in the dark still.”

Did her bottom lip quiver? Would she cry? If she did, he’d lose it and probably shed a few himself. “There is no excuse except that I wasn’t ready to settle down, and I knew you were.”

“Hm, much like now?”

He didn’t answer. Nothing he could say would change her mind. And if the wrong words came out, he’d definitely lose her.

She turned and was gone. He was alone and it was quiet. He didn’t like the sound of his own misery.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

“ARE YOU OKAY?”

Lila looked at Carly through blurred vision. “I’m sorry to wake you.” Lila shifted a sleeping Ava in her arms. The child could sleep through anything. “I just couldn’t stay another second at the McAllister.”

“Don’t apologize. You’re welcome here anytime. Come in. Take Ava down to the nursery and place her in Chasity’s crib.” Carly closed the door and locked it.

“Where’s the baby?” Lila asked.

“In our room. Chance was holding her and they fell asleep. We have her bassinet in there for now. It’s so convenient when nursing.”

“She has him wrapped already, doesn’t she?” Lila chuckled. “And imagine, he was once a dick.”

Carly shook her head. “I’d disagree and defend him but truth is, I thought he was too.”

“Goes to show you that all boys can grow into real men. Too bad there’s one man I know who wishes to always be an ass.”

“Is Duke behaving badly?”

“Let me take care of Ava and then I’ll tell you, okay?”

A few minutes later, Lila and Carly were sitting at the kitchen table over a cup of hot tea. “It wasn’t long ago we’d have our girl chats over wine or whiskey. Now look, we’re drinking the hard stuff.” Carly held up her cup, “Cheers, my dear friend.”

Lila clinked her cup with Carly’s. “Once upon a time, we weren’t breastfeeding and too tired from being a mommy either.” She sipped the fragrant brew. “This is the specialty stuff.”

“It’s from the gourmet shop they opened on the Riverwalk. And for us, yes, times have changed. For the better, though.” Carly sighed. “So now tell me about how bad Duke is being.”

Lila placed her palms down on the table and inhaled deeply. “He is driving me insane.”

Carly shrugged. “And what’s new? You two have always driven each other crazy.”

“This is different. One minute he’s sweeping me off my feet to turn around and drop me on my ass. I don’t think he has a clue what he wants.”

“Well, he does seem to know he wants to be a father. He looks sweet with Ava.”

“True. They are precious together.” Lila squeezed the bridge of her nose between thumb and forefinger. Her head throbbed. She dropped her hand and gazed at her friend. “Duke has walls that I can’t break through.”

Carly patted Lila’s hand. “Honey, it was once me with the very same wall. If Chance had given up I’d probably still be over at the McAllister, alone and brooding over a past that heartbreakingly can never be changed. Sometimes we have to be as tough as nails to help those we love find their way back home.”

“I can’t fight anymore. I’m tired.” Lila fought back tears. She’d wasted enough emotion.

“Listen, sweetie. It’s late. You’re tired. Don’t make any decisions this very moment. Stay here for a few days and give Duke some time to think. Anyway, the first annual Rancher’s Gala is this weekend. You’re going.” Carly’s face lit up and there was a sparkle in her eye.

Lila groaned. “No I’m not. That’s your cup of tea, not mine anymore. Nevertheless, I didn’t buy a ticket.” Lila thought she’d be off the hook, but she should have known better.

“No worries, hun. I bought extra tickets.”

“I don’t have a dress,” Lila said.

 “We have a few days. We’ll go shopping tomorrow. It’ll be fun.”

Lila forced a smile on her tight lips. “Wow, you have this planned, don’t you? I’m not into the social scene any longer.”

Some of the glitter faded from Carly’s expression. “Don’t be a party pooper. All of the other Shelby ranch wives will be attending.”

“I’m not a ranch wife.” Lila felt her mood deteriorate.

“Not yet, but you will be,” Carly said with complete confidence.

“When will that be? When Duke has a brain transplant? It’d be easier to ask for a blizzard here in Texas.”

Carly rolled her eyes. “You don’t want the man to change. You fell in love with him, just as he is. You know as well as I do, he’s your cowboy. You two go together like peanuts and chocolate.”

“I think it’ll take more than a good night’s sleep to make me see Duke’s way of thinking. But as for the Gala, I’ll go because I love you like a sister and I don’t want to disappoint you.” Lila could never say no to her best friend.

Carly clasped her hands together and laughed. “I’m so glad. I haven’t even begun to lose my baby weight yet so I need your help in picking out a dress that hides my muffin top.”

“Carly, you’re beautiful. Any dress will only compliment your body.”

“I hate to interrupt you two night owls, but it is in the middle of the night.”

Lila and Carly both turned at the same time. Chance stood in the doorway to the kitchen swiping sleep from his eyes. Lila wrinkled her nose and gave the best dramatic moan of disgust she could muster. “Did you have to come in here with no shirt on? Now I’m going to have nightmares.”

One corner of Chance’s mouth lifted in wry humor. “You ladies are lucky I put pants on.”

Carly laughed, but Lila shook her head. “I’d be scarred for life.”

Once upon a time, their jabs at one another would have been more hurtful and intentional, but things were different between them. Their verbal insults were more for play, and no longer drew blood.

“I’ll be up in a while, baby,” Carly said.

“Okay, sweetheart.” He strode to her and kissed her on top of the head. “I’ll wait up for you.”

“I hope so.” Carly wriggled her brows.

“Oh, you two! You’d think after a couple of kids you’d have gotten tired of each other,” Lila teased.

Chance turned to Lila, and she thought he was about to say something sour, but instead his features softened. “I don’t think I’ve told you how grateful I am that you were there for Carly and Chastity. Things could have been bad but I know you’d never let anything to happen to my family. And that’s why I was pleased to name our girl Chastity Lila.”

“Thank you, Chance. And you’re right, I’d defend them with all I have.”

“And we hope you and Duke will agree to be Chancelor and Chastity’s God parents. It’d mean the world to us.”

Lila’s heart swelled. “I can’t speak for Duke, but it’d be my honor.”

“Okay then, I’ll leave you ladies alone to chat,” Chance said and disappeared.

Carly beamed. “I love being Mrs. Chance Taylor. I have an awesome life, Lila. It’s a fairytale romance.”

“You’re not actually, uh…well, you know, having sex? It’s only been a few weeks since the baby was born.” Lila had heard that most women had to wait at least six weeks until they’d healed and they were comfortable below the waist.

“No, but there are other ways to satisfy,” Carly said and winked.

“I’m happy for you.” Lila enjoyed seeing the love between her friend and Chance. “Now go to bed. Your man is waiting.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. I really am.”

After Carly was gone, Lila finished her cup of tea, wishing she had a sliver of Carly’s positive views when it came to Duke.

****

“That’s a mighty fine stallion you got there, Duke.”

Duke looked up from the railing where he relaxed to see Chance strolling toward him. “He most certainly is.”

Chance came to the fence, propped one booted foot on the bottom rail and cocked one arm on the top. He pushed back his Stetson and smiled. “You caught him before I could.”

“Doc Bakerfield gave me the four-one-one.”

Chance nodded. “Damn. I sure did lose a great vet when she left Swift Wind.”

“She’s a great doctor, but you gained yourself a whole helluva lot more, my friend.” Duke watched out into the field as the stallion galloped.

“Is that the new horse trainer?” Chance asked.

“Yes, he started yesterday.”

 “Looks like he has good control over the horse,” Chance said.

“So what brings you out here during the morning, Chance? Did Carly send you to play matchmaker?” Duke knew it wasn’t to talk about the horse.

Chance shifted. “Yeah, my wife sent me, but not to play cupid’s arrow. In fact, she told me not to say a word about Lila and Ava. Carly wanted me to give you this.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. “A ticket to the Rancher’s Gala.”

“I ain’t going.” Duke didn’t even think it over. He wasn’t into the social parties on a good year, and this definitely wasn’t even a half way decent one.

“She knew you’d say that,” Chance said.

“You can take the ticket back.”

“I can’t do that,” Chance laughed.

Duke turned and stared at his friend’s profile. “You are one wrapped son-of-a-gun, aren’t you?”

“You bet your ass I am. I’m one lucky cowboy. When a man’s got it good, he knows not to make waves. Anyway, I agree with Carly, you need to be at the Gala.”

Duke admired his best friend. What he shared with Carly was irreplaceable. “You’re a lucky man, pal. But I won’t go as far to say I should attend some social event.”

“And you’re not lucky?”

Duke turned away. He knew the lecture was coming. “Save it, friend.”

“Hell no I won’t save it. Not only do you have a woman who loves you, but you have a little girl who needs her daddy. I’m your best friend and there’s no chance I’ll step back and allow you to destroy the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Before the accident, you were certain what you wanted, and what you needed to do. I get life has played you a bad hand in the past, but if

this were poker, you’d be holding a flush.”

Duke scraped his nail down the rough wood of the rail. “Lila left the McAllister, Chance. I didn’t ask her to leave. In fact, I made it clear I wanted her to stay. Doesn’t that tell me she didn’t want to be here?”

“You’re a stubborn ass. She left because you’ve done nothing but push her away since you woke up from that damn coma. Time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and man up.” Chance wasn’t saving any punches.

Duke kept his gaze focused on something, but nothing, in the distance. “It’s the circle of life, pal. You and I had this conversation about Carly not too long ago.”

“Sometimes a man needs a fire lit under his ass to steer him in the direction where he should be. I know you love your family, my friend. Don’t allow another six years to slip away. Each moment is precious. And by the way,” Chance pulled something else from his pocket. “I found this in your pocket when I pulled you out of the barn that night.”

Duke shifted his chin and saw the small black velvet box in Chance’s palm. “What is it?” Once the words were out, Duke realized what it was. He reached out and took the box, clasping it tightly. “I thought it was lost in the fire.” His chest filled with emotion. He was a tough guy, but some moments derailed his rough exposure.

“I thought I’d hand it to you at the right moment. I can only say that I’m one happy bastard I got my friend back. So, get yourself a tux and be at the gala. You represent the McAllister now as a rancher, man. Don’t let your people down.” Chance buddy slapped him on the back. He started to walk away but then he stopped and said, “And cut that damn long hair. It just ain’t right.”

Duke laughed. “I’ll give it some serious thought.”