Read Sebastian Darke: Prince of Fools Online
Authors: Philip Caveney
Their eyes lit up. Now he had their undivided attention. He had counted on them being devotees of the buffalope god, and it had paid off.
'What does Colin say?' asked the second buffalope eagerly.
'He wants all his followers to rebel against humankind,' said Max.
'What?' The first buffalope looked puzzled. 'And how exactly are we supposed to do that?'
'By doing the exact opposite of what they tell you,' said Max.
The two buffalopes exchanged puzzled looks.
'Why does he want us to do that?' asked the first buffalope.
'It's a test of your resolve. He says that only buffalopes who obey him to the letter will be allowed to join him in Buffalope Paradise – the Great Wallow in the Sky.'
'You're sure this is the word of Colin?'
'Oh, absolutely. He came to me in a vision and he said, "Max, your job will be to spread the word." So here I am.'
'What did he look like?' asked the second buffalope.
'Oh, quite regal really. Big curling horns. Very nice features. You could see he comes from an impeccable background.' Max glanced nervously over his shoulder but there was no sign of his friends yet. 'And he was shimmering with this strange light all around him. And through his nose—'
'The world, hung from a silver ring.' The first buffalope sighed. 'Blimey, I wish I'd seen him.'
'Oh, you will! Once humankind is overthrown he's planning to reveal himself to us all.'
'Really?' The second buffalope looked eager. T can hardly wait.'
'Yes, well, how about a little practice?' suggested Max.
'Umm . . . OK,' said the second buffalope.
'Right, pretend I'm your master. I'll give you an order and—'
'We do the exact opposite,' said the second buffalope. 'Yes, I think we can handle that.'
Max glanced over his shoulder and saw to his alarm that two riders had just appeared at the end of the avenue.
'Right, first of all make sure those gates are properly closed!' he said.
'Which means—' said the first buffalope.
'– that they should be open!' concluded his companion.
Dutifully the two buffalopes began to walk to their left, causing the huge wooden cogs to start turning. The gates slowly began to creak open.
The sound served to rouse the beast-master from his sleep. He stared at the two buffalopes for a moment, then glanced suspiciously at Max. He lifted his head, looked towards the gates and then came fully awake.
'Stop that!' he shouted at the buffalopes. They glanced at each other but continued with what they were doing. The gates continued to swing open.
'You stupid brutes,' growled the beast-master. He got to his feet, grabbed a leather riding crop that hung from his belt and started to beat the buffalopes across the back with it. They winced but kept on opening the gates. 'Stop it!' roared the beast-master. 'Shut those gates!'
Max frowned. He felt terribly guilty for causing the buffalopes such discomfort but these were desperate times. He lowered his head and pawed the ground. The beast-master stopped what he was doing and looked at Max warily.
'What do you think you're doing?' he snarled.
'Getting ready to knock a big stupid bully off his feet,' said Max in the human tongue; and he charged, lowering one horn to get it under the man's legs. He flipped his head upwards and the beast-master was thrown through the air with a bellow of fear. He came down heavily onto a stack of barrels, causing one of them to split open. He slumped unconscious amongst the wreckage. The noise of the collision had woken some of the other guards. They were getting to their feet and looking in dull surprise at the ever-widening gates of the city.
'What the—? Shut those gates!' roared the ruddy-faced officer, the man who had admitted Cornelius a little while earlier. But the buffalopes redoubled their efforts and the gates swung even wider. The officer was going to shout something else, but he suddenly became aware of the thudding of hooves behind him and turned just in time to see two equines bearing down on him, one tall and majestic, the other tiny but galloping for all it was worth. The officer fumbled for his sword, but then they were past him and racing out into the night.
'Guards!' he yelled. 'Fetch equines! We need to go after those men.'
'Colin wants you to
close
the gates now,' Max told the buffalopes; and he galloped after his friends.
The two buffalopes stopped obediently in their tracks, twisted round in their traces and started walking in the other direction. The gates began to swing shut again. Max managed to get through the narrowing gap just in time.
'No!' roared the officer.
'Open
the gates! We need to get after them! Open the bloody gates!'
The buffalopes simply stepped up their pace. The officer ran to the gates and tried desperately to hold them back, but to no avail. 'Help me,' he roared; other soldiers ran to assist him, but they could not compete with the strength of two fully grown buffalopes and the doors slammed shut with a mighty thud, trapping everyone inside.
Sebastian, Cornelius and Max galloped across the plains, following the wheel ruts in the general direction of Brigandia. Cornelius turned in his saddle and stared back towards the palace.
'Nobody seems to be following us!' he shouted. 'In fact it looks like they've closed the gates.'
Sebastian looked at Max, who was racing along with a self-satisfied smile on his face. 'How did you manage that?' he asked incredulously.
Max glanced up at him. 'Never underestimate the power of religion,' he said mysteriously. And that was all he had to say on the matter.
The three friends stood on the ridge in the gathering morning sunlight and gazed despondently down into the valley below them. They saw the sprawling city of Brigandia, dwarfed by distance and laid out like an intricate model on the dusty plain. There were no walls around this lawless place because only the brave and the foolhardy would dare to venture into that maze of narrow streets. Even as they stood there looking down, a tiny cattle wagon was kicking up a trail of dust as it raced under the huge stone arch that marked the main entrance.
'I can't believe it,' said Cornelius angrily. 'They only had a little start on us. By rights, we should have caught up with them before daybreak.'
'It's my fault,' said Max woefully. 'I'm not as young as I used to be. I couldn't keep up that kind of pace all night. I told you to go on without me!'
'It's as much our fault,' said Sebastian. 'What a pity we don't have a map of this area.'
'Who needs a map?' growled Cornelius. 'I've never had any use for such a thing, I just follow my instincts.'
'Well, all right, but you have to admit that we lost our way for quite a while back there. I still say we should have taken the left-hand fork when we came to that dead tree. But you were convinced it was the one on the right . . .'
Cornelius sighed and shook his head. 'Well, whatever the reasons, the whole rescue has just become much more difficult,' he said. 'It's one thing to fight a couple of Brigands in the middle of nowhere. It's quite another to wander into their stronghold and take on the entire population.'
'We're not giving up on Princess Kerin,' Sebastian warned him.
'I didn't say we were! But it's going to require some planning, that much is obvious.' Cornelius turned away and went to sit on a nearby rock. 'I don't suppose you thought to grab any food before we left the royal stables?' he said. 'I'm absolutely starving!'
Sebastian walked over to Captain Tench's equine and unslung a large waterskin from the saddle. 'Only water,' he said. 'Sorry.' He carried it over to Cornelius and handed it to him.
'So what else have you got in there?' demanded Cornelius, indicating a set of bulging saddlebags. 'You certainly spent enough time rooting around in your caravan before we left. I assumed you were getting provisions.'
'I picked up a few things I thought might prove useful,' said Sebastian mysteriously. 'Things that belonged to my father.'
'What things?' asked Max suspiciously.
'Thunder-sticks.'
Max looked suddenly very wary. 'Oh no, not the thunder-sticks,' he said. T didn't even want you to bring them in the caravan, let alone in your saddlebags.'
'What in the name of Shadlog are thunder-sticks?' demanded Cornelius.
'They're these things my father brought back from his visit to the mountains of Kanderban,' explained Sebastian. 'You light the end of them with a tinderbox, and after a few moments they go off with a bang! The Kanderban tribesmen use them in their festivals. My father planned to incorporate them into his act but when he tested one, the explosion was far too powerful—'
'Blew a great big crater in the middle of the field,' said Max. 'I advised the young master to get rid of them before there was some terrible accident. But of course nobody ever listens to me.'
Cornelius frowned. 'I dare say they might come in useful,' he admitted. 'We could use them to create some kind of diversion perhaps. But listen, it might not come to that. As I see it, there's nothing to stop us from riding straight in there. And there's no reason why we can't bid for the princess in the auction – it will probably be open to the public'
'So,' murmured Sebastian, 'you're saying we can just buy her back?'
'Well, we can
bid.
I don't know about you, but I've only got a few croats to my name.' He shook his head ruefully. 'It's maddening! There was a whole stack of gold coins back at that ambush. If I'd only thought to grab them after the fight, we'd probably have enough money to purchase her.'
'Well, I've nothing either,' said Sebastian. 'It's a pity King Septimus didn't give me some of my wages in advance.'
They both looked at Max.
'Obviously I haven't got any!' he told them. 'I'm a buffalope.'
'So we'll have to find another way,' said Cornelius. 'Grabbing the princess should be easy enough; getting out of there in one piece – that's a different matter. Chances are every Brigand in the city will be on our heels.' He actually seemed to brighten at this prospect. He lifted the waterskin to his lips, took a swig, then handed it to Sebastian. T suggest we just make our way down there and do a bit of sniffing around,' he said. 'Try and get the lie of the land. I don't suppose they hold the slave auctions every day: we need to find out where and when they are.'
Sebastian nodded. He took a swig of water himself. 'I hope she's all right,' he said.