Sealing the Deal (16 page)

“Lying?” Beth knit her brows. “Who’s lying?”

“I think your mother knows who Emma’s father is.”

For a moment, all Beth could do was sit dumbly and blink.

“What did she say?” Robert asked, saving her from trying to spit out the words and sounding as befuddled as she felt.

“It wasn’t what she said exactly,” Alexis replied. “It was her tone and how so much went unsaid.” Her gaze found Beth’s. “I could be wrong, which is why I was hoping you could get your mother to open up to you. She might be able to make our job a lot easier.”

“And the adoption a lot harder,” Robert grumbled.

Beth’s relationship with her mother had always been a bit… distant. While a part of the blame was Beth’s, the larger share went to Carol.

Who was she trying to kid? Carol Rogers was the most judgmental, pessimistic, and critical woman Beth had ever known. To grow up constantly hearing how much about her was lacking in her mother’s opinion, Beth had developed an inferiority complex as large as the Grand Canyon. Until she became a teacher and began to hear how good she was at her job and to feel the affection her students held for her, she’d lived life thinking she wasn’t worth too darn much.

The Ladies Who Lunch had zeroed in on her insecurity early in their relationship and gone to great lengths to help Beth learn to appreciate herself. Dani especially went out of her way to compliment Beth, to make her feel as though she had value. She’d made great strides in learning to love herself, but somewhere deep inside would always be the timid little girl who was never quite good enough for her mother.

An A minus? I suppose that’s a good grade. Not quite an A, but…

Class salutatorian? That’s nice. A little more effort and you could’ve been valedictorian, but…

A teacher? That’s a decent job if you don’t mind being poor, but…

With Carol, there was always a “but.”

“I-I’ll try,” Beth promised. “Mom and I, well, we don’t get along.”

The knowing smile on Alexis’s face eased some of the hurt that had crept over Beth. “Just remember you’re doing it for Emma.” Leaning back, she tilted her head. “Now, one more thing. What’s up with the two of you?”

“Pardon?”

“You’re living in the same house, correct?”

Both Beth and Robert nodded.

“And Robert owns it outright,” Alexis said rather than asked. “That actually works both for and against you in an adoption.”

“Why against us?” Robert asked. “I’d think the fact that I own the place shows financial security and stability.”

“It does,” Alexis said. “For you. Not for Beth.” When Alexis smiled, she was downright beautiful. “I suppose my next obvious question is why aren’t the two of you married? The house is an asset if both of you own it. If it’s only Robert, a judge might worry that Emma and Beth could be stranded if he leaves the relationship.”

Beth’s heart froze before suddenly leaping back to life to pound furiously. This wasn’t a topic she wanted broached, especially not in front of someone they barely knew. Everything about what was supposed to be an easy adoption was turning complicated, and Beth felt a knot form in the pit of her stomach. The last thing in the world she wanted was for Robert to feel obligated to do something he simply wasn’t ready to do.

Alexis pushed her chair back and stood. “Well, it appears from the way you’re both speechless that I’ve given you some food for thought. I’ll be in touch in the next few days, and in the meantime, you get with your mother, Beth. See if you can get her to open up.”

* * *

Robert glanced over at Beth, wishing he knew the right thing to say.

Ever since they’d left Alexis Comer’s office, Beth had been as silent as a stone. He’d expected her to be thinking aloud like she always did, asking and then answering questions about the adoption paperwork or about Alexis’s assertion that Beth’s mother knew who Emma’s father was.

Or better yet, the suggestion that he marry Beth.

Instead, she just sat there, her hands folded and resting on the manila folder on her lap. Inside the folder were papers they needed to fill out and bring back to Alexis. He knew those didn’t bother her. What did were the bombs Alexis had dropped.

He couldn’t stand the silence. “Tiffany never told you anything about Emma’s father?”

Beth shook her head.

“Not even a hint?”

“Not even a teeny, tiny hint. She always told me that he didn’t want to be a father and that she just wanted to forget.” She turned her head to stare out the side window. “She confided in Mom, not me.”

The sadness in her voice tore at his heart. He wondered if part of the pain was because she hadn’t truly had a chance to grieve for her sister. Within days of Tiffany’s death, Beth had been back in Cloverleaf and taking care of Emma. Now she had to be hurting that her sister had kept her in the dark about Emma’s father. Knowing how much Beth had done for Tiffany, protecting her from their mother’s harsh criticism, she had to feel betrayed that Tiffany had turned to Carol with such a big secret.

Robert reached over to take her hand in his.

Beth let out a little sigh. “I made a lot of assumptions, which were obviously wrong, especially if Mom knew.”

“Such as?”

She shifted her gaze to his face. “I thought Tiffany might not even know the guy.”

“What do you mean?”

“Tiff was kind of, um, wild. If she was in the mood, she’d pick up some guy at a bar and…” Her shoulders rose in a shrug. “It wouldn’t have been the first time she’d had sex with a man she didn’t even know.”

“I see.”

“I hate myself for thinking that about her, especially because she’d cleaned up her act.”

Robert squeezed her hand, not knowing what to say. Beth had spoken of Tiffany often over the years, usually expressing her concern about her baby sister’s self-destructive lifestyle. He could understand why she’d assumed Tiffany might not know Emma’s father.

“I’ll call Mom tonight,” Beth said with a decisive nod. “I need to know for sure. If she does know, we need to convince that guy to let Emma stay with us.”

“That’s one problem down.”

“One? What’s the other?”

“The house,” he replied.

What Alexis had said about him owning their home as both an asset and a liability to the adoption had hit him hard. He wanted to be sure nothing interfered with Emma being his daughter. If that meant rushing things in his relationship with Beth, so be it. There’d be plenty of time in the future for the two of them to hash out exactly how they felt about each other. The way she gave of herself so freely, both in the bedroom and out of it, told Robert she cared for him. And he’d grown to need her in his life. Without her, there was no reason to face each new day.

Swallowing hard, he jumped into the pool with both feet. “I’m ready to put it in your name, too. Then there won’t be a problem with it anymore. We’ll both be owners of a paid-in-full home.”

There. He’d said it. He’d actually given her half of a five-hundred-thousand-dollar home just to show her how much he loved her and Emma.

So why was she frowning at him?

“B, tell me what’s bugging you.”

“You’re giving me half the house? Just like that. Here, have half of my ultra-expensive, showcase house.”

“Yep. I don’t want anything to mess up this adoption. Emma is ours. We need to be sure no one has any reason to question whether we’d be good parents.”

Robert pulled into the driveway of his sister’s home. After killing the engine and shoving the keys into his pocket, he looked over at Beth. She was still frowning the same way she always did when someone had hurt her feelings. Problem was, he had no idea what he’d said that could have been remotely injuring.

“Now what’s wrong?” he asked, resisting the urge to throw his hands up in exasperation.

He was never going to understand her. He’d tried. God knew he’d tried. Up until she started scowling at him, he’d thought he’d done a good job of giving her what she needed to be happy.

After all, he’d stepped up to the plate and assumed responsibility for her and for Emma. How many men would do that?

He’d given her a bigger and much nicer home when she’d been in that cramped studio apartment. He’d helped her arrange great child care for Emma during the times when one of them couldn’t be with her. And he’d shared himself with Beth in a way he’d never done before—body, mind, and heart.

Anger sparked inside him. Why wasn’t she thanking him for all he’d done instead of getting pissed? Why wasn’t she excited that adopting Emma wasn’t going to be too difficult?

Beth interrupted his inner diatribe. “Did you get a chance to get the stuff we needed at the grocery store? I gave you that list this morning…”

“Stop changing the subject,” Robert snapped. Then the answer hit him right between the eyes. The grocery store. Beth’s list. “
That
explains everything.”

“What are you talking about?”

“The grocery list. I remember everything that was on it, and that explains things.”

She threw her hands up. “Oh, well, that clears it all up. For
one
of us.” With a weighty sigh, she put her hands on her thighs. “Could you please tell me why remembering the grocery list explains anything?”

“You had me buy chocolate bars.”

Her eyes narrowed.

Since he knew what was irking her, he didn’t get angrier. “You’ve obviously got PMS.”

* * *

If Beth hadn’t laced her fingers together, she would’ve smacked Robert. But she wouldn’t hit him. No matter how much he deserved it. “Why does every man on this whole stupid planet think that whenever a woman’s upset, she has PMS?”

“You mean you’re n-not close to that time of the m-month?”

His nervous stutter eased some of her annoyance, but she kept her hands squeezed together just in case he said something else stupid. “Did it ever cross your mind that
you
might be the reason I’m upset?”

“Me? What did
I
do?”

You want Emma and not me!

Instead of shouting her frustration, Beth bit her bottom lip and shook her head. “Never mind.”

He shook his head. “Nope. You don’t get off the hook that easy.” When he reached for her hand, she let him take it. “Look, B. I only want to understand what’s got you so upset. Help me understand. Please.”

She knew he was frustrated, and the blame lay with her. How could he possibly figure things out if she wasn’t honest with him? But how could she tell him how much she wanted him to love her the way she loved him? There was no way she’d put her heart on the line like that. What if she told him the truth, that she loved him, and he said something thoughtless like
thanks
?

None of this would be a problem if she were the kind of person a man like Robert could love.

Would Carol’s critical voice ever leave her alone, even in her own thoughts?

Beth tried to focus on the more obvious problem. She wasn’t about to let him put her name on that deed. “I can’t take half the house, Robert.”

He shot her an incredulous glare. “W-why not?”

“I just can’t. It’s too much.”

He pulled his lips into a grim line, lost in thought for a few moments. “So you won’t let me put your name on the deed?”

She shook her head. “It’s your house.”

“It’s our house,” he insisted. “Yours, mine, and Emma’s.”

“You’re very generous.” She squeezed his hand. “And I’m grateful you’d be willing to do that. I can’t let you.” Lifting their joined hands, she brushed a kiss on his knuckles. “You’re such a giving man, Robert Ashford. I thank God every day He sent you to me. To us. It’s just not right for me to take that kind of money from you.”

The man actually blushed.

“But I do thank you for the offer.”

“You really won’t let me give you half the house?”

“Nope. No way.”

His sigh filled the silence that settled between them. “Well, then… That only leaves us one choice if we want this adoption to work.”

This was the most confusing conversation she’d ever had. “One choice? What do you mean?”

“You’re just gonna have to marry me, B.”

That’s it?
That’s
his marriage proposal?

Beth closed her eyes, willing herself not to cry. She wasn’t normally a weepy person, but it seemed like she’d done nothing but fight back tears since Tiffany’s death. When she should be doing backflips because the man she loved had just said “marry” without even stuttering, she was on the verge of wailing in anguish.

There would be no sweet, romantic moment, no image to treasure of Robert dropping to one knee as he asked her to be his bride. Instead, she’d have the memory of the businesslike statement that stole away every ounce of tenderness from the proposal.

Beth gave herself an inner scolding. Reminding herself that she was thirty and that she was long past girlish notions of romance, she tried to focus on the good in the situation. Robert wanted to be Emma’s father. That much was crystal clear.

What wasn’t nearly as cut and dry was whether he held the same kind of affection for Beth. Desire? Definitely. But love?

Teaching for years had shown her so many different family situations. The marriages that held no love were the easiest to spot. No way she’d let herself be one of those wives who constantly had to look at her husband with a suspicious eye, nor would she be the type of woman who would find herself searching for affection outside her marriage when her husband grew cold.

But Robert wasn’t cold. At least not yet. If she loved him, if she kept giving her heart freely and let him know how much he meant to her, couldn’t he learn to love her in return?

God help her, she just didn’t know.

“B?” He squeezed her hand.

“Can I think about it?” Even though she wanted to shout that she would be his wife, she had to search her heart to see if she could get past his brusque order that should have been a tender question.

He didn’t pull away, but the hurt was clear when he turned to look at her. “How long?”

“How long what?” From the moment he’d said they should marry, she’d been drowning in thoughts that ranged from disappointed to elated and back again. Her brain couldn’t seem to concentrate on what he was saying now.