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I wasn’t sure how to take that one. Fortunately, Sammy saved the day, or at least the moment. ‘Right, missy. What are you drinking? On me, of course.’

‘Cheers, a glass of white would be good.’

With Sammy otherwise occupied, Paula finally gave me her full attention. Sitting on the barstool next to me, she said: ‘Are you okay, Jim? All this business with my dad has me worrying about you. He said you’re chucking your job and selling up. What’s the deal?’

I heard what she had said, but all that was going on in my brain was that, after twelve long years, I was looking at Paula Fraser and she was looking back at me. That was as much as I was able to process, and I could do nothing but smile as I failed to recognise an answer was required.

‘How drunk are you, Jim?’

I’m ashamed to admit I briefly toyed with the thought of saying I was ‘drunk with love’, but luckily I wasn’t quite that drunk with tequila. ‘Sorry,’ I managed to say instead. ‘It’s just a shock, seeing you. Your dad said you weren’t coming home till next week. Seeing you, in here, with Sammy being here as well. It’s a bit ...’

‘Tell me about it,’ Paula said. ‘I got the chance of a cheap flight yesterday and arranged to catch up with Sammy. You, I didn’t expect.’

‘Sorry.’

‘Is that still your favourite word?’

‘With you? Yes, it probably is.’ Wrong thing to say. Suddenly the world was awkward.

‘Anyway,’ Paula said, regrouping. ‘What the hell has happened in the world to make you and my daddy drinking partners? I can honestly say I never saw that one coming.’

‘Yeah, me neither. I’m not sure I can explain it, to be honest. Can I ask you something?’

‘Go for it.’

‘What the fuck is the deal with the whole Joe/Simon thing? And the
he doesn’t like Guinness, oh, yes he does?
’

Paula laughed. ‘Wait till he starts on Bruce Lee, then you’re in real trouble.’

‘It’s too late for that. You should see my inbox.’

‘
Jaysus
, he must like you. That’s ...’ she paused. ‘That’s quite nice, really.’ She smiled that enigmatic smile, again. She was indeed her father’s daughter.

‘But what’s it in aid of?’

Paula shrugged. ‘He’s his own man.’

That was no help, and I moved on. ‘Is it the German thing?’ I said, displaying more stupidity than even I thought myself capable of.

‘What?’ Paula looked suspicious.

‘Bruce Lee’s grandad was German.’ I was sure of my facts, but not so confident about their relevance. God knows why, but I continued. ‘Is that why your dad likes Ingo?’

‘You really are still a wanker, aren’t you?’ Paula shook her head. It looked more like disbelief than anger.

I didn’t have an adequate defence on that one, so was glad when Sammy chose that point to return, bearing drinks.

‘Here you go, doll.’ He placed a large glass of wine in front of Paula. ‘I figured I’d better get you another pint too, Jim. I took it out of the kitty.’

‘Cheers, Sam.’ I took a slurp.

‘So what did I miss?’ Sammy said.

‘Jim has a theory that Germany is a unifying influence on my family history.’

‘Really?’ Sammy was all ears. ‘Tell me, then.’

‘Does anyone know the German for
faux-pas
?’ I said. I was relieved to see Paula smile properly again. ‘Just me being drunk and daft, as usual.’

Paula and Sammy looked at one another and nodded in silent agreement. ‘Jim Cooper,’ they said in unison. ‘You are by far the ...’

‘Yes, I know,’ I interrupted. ‘I’m the biggest wanker you’ve ever met. Ha and, what’s more,
ha
.’ I was getting a bit sick of that one. ‘Can we move on, perhaps?’

‘Sorry, Jim,’ Paula said. ‘Old times, you know? Anyway, back to reality. My dad reckons you’re going through early onset male menopause. Are you going to buy a motorbike and get a job in a pub?’

‘Well, hah,’ I said.

‘Didn’t he tell you?’ Sammy said. ‘He’s starting in here on Tuesday.’

Chapter 9

Yes, Sammy offered me a job and I accepted. He might say I begged for a job and he relented but that’s bollocks, honest.

Pulling pints for minimum wage, nothing wrong with that. It sort of fit with the whole ‘starting again’ thing. Being in The Basement with Sammy was a trifle surreal, but I decided to view it as a sign I was doing the right thing.

And then there was Paula. As soon as I’d heard her voice I knew I was still in love with her. No debate, no arguments, no doubts. She was ‘it’.

But ‘it’ was married.

‘So what’s your surname now, then?’ I said, when a group of freshly arrived customers prompted Sammy to leave us alone again.

‘Neumann.’

‘Paula
Neumann
, seriously?’ There were two angles there, but I chose the least controversial first. ‘Like Butch Cassidy?’

‘Yes, Jim, that’s exactly what it’s like.’

‘Sorry,’ I said. ‘So, how is your
new man
?’

‘I’ve been with him for six years, he’s hardly new.’

‘Yeah, sorry. It’s just weird to think of you being married.’

‘I suppose I’ve had more time to get used to it than you,’ Paula said, dropping her eyes. And there was the awkwardness again.

‘I guess,’ I said. ‘Is it okay to ask if you’re happy?’

Paula looked up. ‘It’s been a tough couple of years, but yes, I’m happy.’ I’m not sure if I only imagined some sadness in her smile. ‘Thanks.’

‘Your dad told me about the school not working out. That must have been hard.’

‘Yeah, it was sad. We put a lot into it. The crippling debt isn’t exactly pleasant, either. Still, I don’t know anyone who isn’t up to their eyeballs these days.’

‘I’m not,’ I said. ‘Or at least I won’t be in a couple of weeks.’

‘You’ve sold your flat, then?’

‘Yep, moving out on Sunday.’

‘Have you got a new place?’

‘Eh,’ I said. ‘Actually, it turns out there’s not going to be much left over once I pay everything off, so I’m going to stay with my mum and dad. Just for a wee while.’

Paula shook her head and laughed. ‘Correct me if I’m wrong, but we lost touch because I thought you should have a bit of ambition beyond working in The Basement and staying at your mum’s when you were twenty-one. And now, twelve years later, you’re about to be working in The Basement and staying at your mum’s?’

‘Well, yes. But at least I’m out of debt.’ My penchant for innocent petulance was barely attractive to Paula when we were nineteen; now even I could hear how childish it was, and I liked me. ‘Sorry,’ I added, as usual.

‘Fair point,’ Paula said, still laughing. ‘At least I had a flat back then, now I’m at my mum’s, too. I guess you’re one up on me. We’re a right pair, us two, aren’t we?’

‘So it seems,’ I said. She’d said we were a
pair
. She’d said
us two!

‘It’s good to see you, Jim.’

Result! ‘You too. You look good, Paula, not a day over forty.’ I pulled out the old puppy-dog look, for old time’s sake.

‘Cheeky
fecker
! At least I’ve still got my hair.’

That she did, and beautiful it was, too. ‘That you do,’ I began. ‘And—’

 
‘What’s the scoop, Coop?’ I closed my eyes as Terry draped an arm over my shoulder. We were having a
moment
there, I thought to myself. ‘Wee
Ronni’s
missing you over there. Some bastard’s ordered a round of Baileys.’ Terry smiled drunkenly at me, then turned his attention to a now nervous looking Paula. ‘Is this prick annoying you, hen? Say the word and I’ll take him outside.’

‘No, you’re fine,’ Paula said as I squirmed.

‘Honestly, it’s no bother. I never liked him.’

‘Terry, this is an old mate of mine,’ I said, praying he hadn’t noticed Paula’s accent and wouldn’t ask me her name.

‘Really? My apologies, miss. Given your accent, can I assume you’re the famed Paula Fraser?’ Drunk enough to annoy but sober enough to observe, by far Terry’s most dangerous state.

‘Eh, yes that’s me,’ Paula said, giving me a confused look.

‘Hah, Terry’s met your dad a couple of times, too,’ I said.

A look of amused understanding appeared on Paula’s face as she digested the name and, politely but not un-obviously, took note of Terry’s waistline. ‘Terry, of course. He did mention you. It’s nice to meet you.’ She held out her hand and shook Terry’s.

‘And you, Paula,’ he said. ‘It’s always good to put a face to a fantasy.’

‘Sorry?’ Paula said.

‘Hah, shut it, Terry,’ I said. ‘Away back and guard my Baileys. I’ll be over in a minute.’

‘Whatever you say, sir. A delight to meet you, Paula.’ Terry bowed.

‘And you, sir,’ Paula said, laughing as Terry backed away and returned to the throng. ‘He seems nice.’

‘Yeah, he’s okay. A bit pissed, sorry.’

‘You should go back to your mates. It’s your night out, after all.’

‘No, there’s no rush. They’re here for the beer, not me,’ I said.

‘Jim, don’t be rude. I’m back, you work here and you’re best mates with my dad. I’m sure we’ll run into each other again soon enough.’ And, with that, the moment was gone.

‘Yeah, I suppose,’ I said. ‘But—’

‘Anyway, no offence, but I came here to see Sammy. That big bugger owes me a dinner, and I intend to collect tonight. Do you hear me, Sammy? Get your coat on and grab your homo-satchel, I’m
needin
’
feedin
’.’

Sammy looked over from behind the bar, where he was huddled with the two staff. ‘Loud and clear,
m’dear
. Won’t be a minute, just filling the troops in about our new recruit.’

Chapter 10

‘Hi, Mum.’

‘Hello, Jim. In you come then.’ She stepped back to allow me into the hall, not quite suppressing a ‘tut’ as the canvas shoulder bag containing my entire wardrobe clattered off her knee as I passed.

‘Sorry.’

‘No problem, go on through.’

‘Dad not in?’ I asked, once I’d made it to the living room.

‘He’s upstairs moving the computer out of his, your, room.’

‘Oh, okay.’ Within days of me moving out nine years previously my dad had transformed my bedroom into a study/computer/music/
placetogowhenhewantedtobealone
room.

My parents lived in a small, two bedroom terrace in
Muirend
, and neither of them had attempted to hide the fact that they were looking forward to the extra space. I hadn’t been insulted or hurt by this; they were only being practical. Plus, at the time I was at least as eager to go as they were to see me leave.

‘It would be nice if you went up and gave him a hand.’ She was never one for making her hints too oblique, my mum.