#Score (34 page)

The way she strokes me, sucks me, obeys me . . . it’s more than I can ask for. All I can do in return is to caress her, lick her, command her—until she falls apart in my arms each time.

I lower myself to her, slipping between her thighs as if I’m made to live there. I bury myself inside her, careful with my shoulder but strong enough to support us both. Paige cries out softly, a whimper, really, and I make it my mission to hear that sound for the rest of the night.

This time, the sex is different—it’s not the rough, frantic passion that we’ve become accustomed to, but something else. The sensuous way she rises above me and collapses against me when she gets on top of me is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. I push the sweaty bit of hair back from her face and see the sweet smile when we finish. Three words are on the edge of my tongue, but I don’t say them. I try not to think them.

In that moment, with her tits swaying and her cheeks a rosy red, I see her in a different way. She is glowing, happy. She’s no longer Uh, Paige, with the knobby knees and giant red glasses. She’s Paige Sullivan, badass lady boss with the sexy hips and lips.

And that is going to make it
so
much harder when I have to leave.

I
consider everything
a success when I wake up in the morning curled up next to Elijah’s smooth chest and realize we’ve made it through the night. It’s a new day, and even though the pain will never go away completely, he’s one day further away from it.

Me, on the other hand . . . well, there’s still plenty of work to do. I glance over Elijah’s shoulder at the digital clock on the nightstand and groan. Plenty of work that I’m late for, too.

Making a beeline for my phone, I hurry and text Stacey to ask her to open shop for me because I’m a little indisposed at the moment. Plus, I still have to run back to my apartment and grab clean clothes. Maybe even run a brush through my hair, if I’m feeling frisky.

As soon as I hit the
Send
button, I melt back against Elijah’s chest, not wanting to leave. Each time I’ve been with him, it’s been harder and harder to pull myself away, but last night . . . Everything that happened . . . I have to literally drag myself away from his resting body. It’s probably a good thing, because I know that if he were actually awake, I would definitely not be getting into the office today.

–

T
he ride
to work is quick, without any of the usual traffic at this hour, but my mind is replaying everything over and over again, taking my focus off the day ahead of me. I know it was very emotional for us last night, but it was just because of the day, right? I felt bad for Elijah and everything he’s been going through, so naturally, things were a little . . . different. I’m sure it’ll go back to how it was before when I see him next, as though none of that sweet, mushy, beautiful, amazing . . .
Oh God
.

My heart slams inside my ribcage, shooting upward until I’m sure it’s in my throat. Self-realization can be a tricky thing.

I’m only now pulling up to the office, but I can’t bring myself to turn off the car just yet. I can’t just stroll into the place as if nothing happened. As if my whole everything hasn’t shifted tremendously under my feet.

I’ve been playing myself this whole time. I don’t know how I managed to do it, but I know it’s the truth. What happened with Elijah last night isn’t something that happened with anyone else. I know what it is. The soft touches, the way he ran his fingers through my hair, and how he whispered my name against my lips. No, that’s not just for
anyone
. I realize this hasn’t been puppy love between me and Elijah. Part of the memories fit beautifully into what’s going on between us, yes, but this is something new. Something that has bloomed from old seeds.

This is real, honest-to-God love.

I gasp at the admission, gripping the steering wheel tightly in my hands until my knuckles turn white. I love Elijah. I am
in love with
Elijah. I always have been.

The sun is a little too bright outside and the world seems a little too loud. I’m thankful for the moment of peace as I come to terms with the very thing that has been trying to break out of a cage shoved way in the back of my mind.

It’s funny how things start to quickly unfold and make sense, like little pieces of a huge jigsaw puzzle coming together. Now I know why we found our way back to each other. Because that’s what happens when you’re really meant to be with someone—when you’re soulmates.

The word used to always seem contrived, overused and basically all pretend, but I get it now. This isn’t just about our hearts, our bodies, or even our brains. There’s something more at play when it comes down to me and Elijah, and I know it has to do with our souls, so why not call a spade a spade?

I’m sitting here with probably the craziest look on my face, my fingers going numb from holding on so tightly, and here comes Stacey, whipping into her parking space beside me. It occurs to me that even though I just figured out possibly the most important thing of my life, the rest of the world is going about its own business as if nothing amazing at all is happening. Talk about feeling small.

Stacey is obviously eyeing me from her car, wondering what the hell I’m doing just sitting here when we only have a few minutes to spare before our 9 o’clock appointment. Thank God that Elijah decided to skip today’s session and take some extra time to himself to recoup from yesterday’s turmoil, because I’m not sure I’d be able to handle seeing his face right now. At least, not at work. So I set up a different appointment in the open slot instead.

“Rough night?” She asked me over the top of my car.

“In a way. But then again, not so much. What about you? You look pretty tired again today. I thought I told you to start taking some vitamins?”

Stacey waves me off as we go up to the door so I can unlock it. “Yeah, yeah. I know I need to take vitamins. I guess I should go to the doctor. Actually, I already have an appointment planned, so I’m gonna need that day off.”

I twist the key to the left and let us and, pulling open the shades on our front window. “You need the whole day off just to go to the doctor? That sounds . . . a little intense.” I mean, it doesn’t matter to me one way or the other, but I’m surprised.

“It’s going to be a pretty lengthy appointment, from what I’ve been told.” Stacey’s voice sounds a little funny, but I don’t say anything because well, I’m pretty wrapped up in my own head at the moment.

“Gotcha. Okay, so who do we have lined up today? Let’s take a look. I know we have Mrs. Davidson coming in to fill the open spot, but then I think—”

“Okay, okay. I can’t hold it in any more,” Stacey interrupts, her face lighting up. “I’m pregnant. We’re going to have a baby.”

It only takes half a second for my jaw to drop wide open. “Oh my God, are you serious right now? Seriously?”

The tears in her eyes say it all, and I pull her into a tight squeeze, not giving a damn if I’m squishing her or not. This is just totally batshit-crazy here, especially considering that I know it’s been a personal struggle for Stacey and Rafael to try and have a baby for the past two years or so. She’s been taking hormone shots, and they’ve had all this other stuff done, and it was getting pretty close to the point where I knew she was going to give up if nothing happened soon.

“Yeah, I can’t believe it. Everything feels like this is someone else’s life, you know what I mean?” Stacey says, gripping my shoulders. “I mean, we’ve wanted this for so long, and now that it’s here, I don’t know. There really aren’t any words, I guess.”

I pull back to look at her face, so happy for my big sister and hopeful for everything to go perfectly without any problems. Imagining her with a baby in her arms is kind of weird, I’ll admit it, but it’s also sweet too. “I know one thing. You’re definitely gonna have to cut back on the sailor mouth.”

“Pssh, hardly. My kid’s got to learn straight off the bat that Mama says what she wants to say and none of it gets repeated.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’re going to have a real ball with that one. Stacey, I’m so happy for you guys. Oh my gosh, I get to plan your baby shower.”

I’m already dreaming up baby themes and weird baby shower games when Stacey holds her hand up to my face. “Stop. I already see the gears turning in your carrot-head. I don’t want one of those weird baby showers were everybody has to play some stupid smell the diaper game thing. Classy, that’s what I want. Besides, we have plenty of time to plan all that shit. What we need to do is hit the stores and go look for all the most adorable baby clothes we can find.”

We both laugh, and I can feel something settled deep into my chest—a certain knowledge that Stacey and her new little family are going to be all right. But how am I going to fare? It’s definitely a selfish thought, but after the earlier revelation, it’s kind of hard not to be a little selfish.

And as usual, my sister catches my change of thought right away. “So why were you sitting in your car looking like you were in one of those sad, sappy-ass music videos? Is something wrong?”

I snort at her description. “No, nothing’s wrong. I was coming to terms with some . . . things.”

She gestures for me to continue, so I do.

“Before I begin, let me preface this by saying that I’ve been pretty stupid this whole time.”

Stacey leans back against the reception desk with a smug smile on her face. “Girl, who are you telling?”

“I’m going to pretend that I didn’t just hear that. Anyway, so things between me and Elijah . . . they’ve been a little different lately.”

“How so?” she asks.

I try to casually shrug my shoulders as if nothing is really weighing on my mind. “Things happened. And I get this feeling like maybe it might actually be kind of, I don’t know—”

Stacey throws up her hands, almost growling at me. “Will you just get to the damn point, Paige?”

“All right, fine. I’m in love with Elijah. There. Now it’s all out there in the world. Oh my God, that feels so weird to say out loud.”

And while I’m in the middle of having some sort of self-existential crisis, my sister laughs. “Seriously? That’s your big news? Well, duh. Who didn’t already know that one? Jesus, Paige, I thought you were about to tell me that Elijah put it up your ass or something. Now that would’ve been quite a revelation.”

I blush in spite of myself because God knows, the woman knows how to get right under my skin. “Not that a revelation like that would be any of your business, as I have pointed out several times over, but I did figure out how I feel during the ride here this morning. And like I said before, I have been pretty dumb about not realizing it up until now. I get it, so you don’t have to emphasize that whatsoever. Trust me.”

“Okay. So you’re in love with Elijah, and now every single person in the world finally knows. So what happens now?”

I look down at the floor because honestly, I haven’t thought that far ahead yet. “Well, I mean, he’s going to be going back to Texas in a matter of a few weeks after the last few sessions are done here. And then I don’t know. Maybe we can do the long distance thing?” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I know it’s not going to happen. Neither of us is going to be able to withstand something that stressful, even though I know we’re meant to be together. But this isn’t something that I can do, where we only see each other via Skype or something. This is something that needs to be out in the open every day, all day long for me, something that’s an extension of me like one of my limbs.

Surprisingly, my sister doesn’t give me a smart quip and instead puts her hand on my shoulder. “Oh honey, you know that’s not gonna work out. Something else is going to have to happen here. The only question is who’s moving where?”

I bite my lip. “I think the main question here is does he feel the same way? I mean, shouldn’t I figure that out first before I start making declarations of love and stuff?”

She gives me a knowing look. “Pretty sure you don’t have to ask, but okay. If it makes you feel any better, I guess. Let me just say that I’m all for Texas Pete moving out here to be with you. Because okay, don’t tell anyone, but I would seriously miss your ass if you left me here. I am not going to be able to handle Mama on my own with a brand new baby. You just can’t do that to me, okay?”

I laugh and pull her back into a hug, because this little bit of normalcy with my sister is all that’s really keeping me together at the moment. “We’ll see how it goes. But thank you.”

Behind us, the little doorbell goes off, and in comes Mrs. Davidson for her 9 o’clock appointment. Back to business, it seems.

But as I’m setting up Mrs. Davidson on the rowing machine, I keep thinking back to my predicament with Elijah. While I know it would be pretty tough on Stacey if I did leave, I know that deep down, I’ll do whatever it takes to be with Elijah if he’ll have me.

But first, I need to find out if he wants me.

I
have
to admit that taking the day off to do whatever the fuck I like was a pretty good call on my part. It’s a beautiful day out, and all I really feel like doing is soaking up some much-needed sun. Being stuck inside with that stupid sling was rough, but now that I finally have it off and my skin can breathe, the rest of me wants to do the same.

I knock on the door between mine and Dubs’s rooms and let him know that I’m going for a quick run before heading out. For late October, it is pretty warm outside, which is perfect for me. I fix my shoes and pull on my headphones, ready to blast some old school DMX before I take off.

I don’t start at my usual pace. Instead, I have to work up to it because jostling my arm and shoulder around more than I have been lately doesn’t exactly feel good. I curse to myself at feeling weak from the muscle tear. You wouldn’t think that something that sounds so easy to repair takes so damn long. That’s just the unfortunate reality of my situation.

Right around the time sweat starts to bead across by forehead, my phone goes off in my pocket and I have to stop, taking in a few breaths before answering it. Goddammit. My dad is the last—and I mean the very last—person I want to talk to right now. He’s been bugging often lately, even at all hours of the night. I know he’s a hard-ass, but he’s been even weirder about it lately.

“Yeah?”

He sounds muffled at first until he turns his face toward the phone. “Elijah? Hey, I need to talk to you really quickly, bud.”

I roll my eyes as I take a seat on the curb. “All right. I’m here, what’s up?”

He takes in a deep breath before letting it out, the sound of it hurting my ear. Does he have to be so damn dramatic all the time? I mean, seriously, breathe like a normal person.

“It’s about Kevon. He had an accident during practice a little while ago—looks like they had to take him to the hospital. It was a head injury.”

I immediately freeze. These things don’t happen to Kevon. He’s like a fucking tank, like a really
fast
fucking tank. We always used to joke back when we first joined the team about how nothing can touch him. It was a fact he never let anyone leave the room without hearing. “Shit, is he okay?”

More muffled talking before I can finally hear them again. “Not sure. But it looks like he might be in a coma at the moment.”

Coma? “Did you just say a coma?” No, that can’t be right. I would just know somehow. I don’t know how, but I would.

“He, uh, yeah. I think that’s what they said. Hey, man, I don’t know what exactly is gonna happen here, and I know you’re still working on your rehab and all—”

I cut him off. “I get it. Just call Johnny and Coach T for me. Let them know I’ll be out on the first flight I can get. In fact, I might even call in a favor with one of Johnny’s guys and see if I can get my own personal flight out there. That might be faster, actually.”

“All right, son. I’ll let them know. I’ll see you soon then.” He hangs up, and I stuff my phone back into my pocket, shaken up.

It’s probably nothing, right? Guys get injured all the time. It’s kind of part of the job description. But Kevon? This is different. This is me being completely out of my element and not knowing what the hell to do. All I can do is just get out there and be there for him, no matter what. He would do the same for me.

It only takes me fifteen minutes, but I manage to rope a flight through Johnny’s PR team, thank God. I know there are things that I should be thinking about like getting my stuff together, checking out of the hotel, and dealing with Paige too.

My mind’s moving too fast though. I can barely keep up with it. I’ll have to take care of everything else while I’m on my flight because I’m just too jittery to deal with it all. I race back to the hotel room and get dressed in some regular clothes, searching for my house keys.

Now that I’m about to bite the bullet and go back home, I’m wondering if I should consider my rehab to be finished in North Carolina. It was only a matter of time—three weeks, in fact. I knew this whole time how fast it was going to go by, especially if things happened between Paige and me.

And if that’s the case and they let me back on the roster sheet, I might even get in a game or two before the season’s finished. I can’t count the times that I’ve thought about how shitty this season has been for me, considering I didn’t even make it to the first regular-season game. This might be my chance to redeem myself.

My phone dings in my pocket, and I’m hesitant to pull it out just in case it’s my father with worse news. I’m not sure I’d be able to handle anything worse than Kevon being in a fucking coma.

But it’s just Paige this time, texting me to ask if I want to get some lunch with her on her break. It’s funny how the rest of the world is going about its own damn business as if nothing shitty is happening to my best friend—a thought that pisses me off. No one outside our inner circle probably knows yet. Talk about feeling small.

I don’t know what to say to Paige. I can’t just leave her without saying goodbye. And trust me, I know how absolutely ironic that is. But I just can’t do it, and I won’t. I sigh as I pull my phone back out and start texting her back.

Hey. Long story, but I have to go back to Texas tonight. My flight leaves in two hours—Sorry.

It’s a lame text, and I hate having to send it because there were things I was thinking about earlier, before my run. A lot of things dealing with Paige and how I feel about her. But in the grand scheme of things, right now is not the time to worry about it. And thank God that I know Paige. She’ll understand.

I hope.