Scintillate (18 page)

Thirty-Four

I

backed away. Their whisperings faded under the pounding of my pulse in my ears. Shallow breaths escaped in loud puffs no matter how I tried to reel them in. I yearned to find Finn, but how could I explain my trembling body, my cold, shaking hands, my complete terror from what I’d overheard?

Finding the doorway that led to the lighthouse tower, I took the winding stairs two at a time. My foot slipped on one of the smooth stone steps, and I tumbled forward. My hand scraped against the stone wall, pricking my palm with the sharp sting of a cut.

Blood made my hand slip on the doorknob. I shoved my shoulder into the wood and barreled through, then quickly locked it.

Did you take from her?

I thought it had been a dream. That she had heard me scream and came to check on me. But of course she couldn’t have heard me so far up in the lighthouse. Unless…unless she was already in my room.

Shakily, I rinsed my hand, wrapped it in a towel, and sat on my bed. I knew it was possible to take from someone’s aura because I had seen it with my own eyes, and I had felt the terrifying pull of it from my own skin. Finn’s parents were like that man? No, wait, their auras weren’t white like his. How could Ina do that to me? Was it because I’d been asleep, defenseless? If so, it was spineless thievery.

I watched Giovanni give of himself to that little girl. It calmed her, seemed to make her happy. Was that what Ina was doing? Taking a little “hit” off me? Getting what Giovanni said everyone in the world wants most: to feel good? Her knowledge of auras and energy must have taught her that she could do it consciously. I placed my hand over my racing heart. I needed to stay calm.

I should leave this place tonight.
Maybe I could go to Giovanni and then find a room at another hostel in the morning. But it was night. I had no real idea how or where I was going to go, dark roads, foreign country, whispering ghosts, and all that…and I was still really concerned that someone with an ugly soul had been in my room in Dublin. I had no idea if the person had been there for me, but if so, who was to say they wouldn’t find me again? Staying put for the night behind a locked door seemed the lesser of all evils. I’d call Giovanni first thing in the morning and break away.

I remembered the stash of hard candies at the bottom of my purse and dug for the bag. I leaned back on my pillows and swirled the cherry flavor in my mouth. I kept my clothes on, even my shoes, and packed everything back into my duffel. That took all of five minutes.

I’d managed to calm myself enough to let sleep drag its heavy hand over my eyes, but one thought kept me from giving in to it. What did Ina mean when she said she could see the blackest hole in every heart?

A rattling sound startled me. I lay in the darkened room with the flavor of old candy on my tongue and listened. My hand was throbbing. The doorknob rattled again. A light flipped on outside my door.

“Jaysus!” It was Finn’s voice. He banged on the door, causing me to startle. “Cora!”

“Yes?”

“There’s blood on your door.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to apologize. No. I wanted to see you. I couldn’t lie there another minute knowing you were so close and not come to you.”

I tiptoed across the plank floor to the door. I kneeled down and peeked underneath. I couldn’t see Finn’s aura, only his bare feet poking out from beneath his jeans. I stood and put my hand to the door, trying to absorb the warmth of him through the wood.

“What happened to you? Why is there blood?”

“I-I slipped. I’m okay.”

“Want me to kiss it?”

I smiled.
Yes, so bad.
“I’m not dressed.”

“Even better.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “I’m sorry about earlier.”

“That’s okay,” I answered. “I’m not mad at you for wanting me.”

“I still want you.”

Silence and longing.

“I’m so tired,” I finally answered. It was true, but I was unsure why I made an excuse not to see him. I think I was afraid that if he came in, I’d find myself spilling every detail of my eavesdropping. How do you tell your boyfriend that you can see auras, that your own aura is rare and coveted, and that you think his mother is a nasty, aura-snatching thief?

“Can we talk tomorrow?” I asked through clenched teeth, knowing I was going to have to give him a good reason for leaving.

He sighed. I’m sure he had the same thought I did.
How many tomorrows did we have?

Thirty-Five

I

couldn’t get back to sleep. I spent the whispering hours between night and day reading
Grace
. Much of it didn’t connect together at all. There were articles about the existence of auras, newspaper clippings of people who disappeared, and her handwritten notes.

Dr. M spoke about “categories” of humans, as though there are delineations beyond our known differences such as ethnicity and blood type.

He thinks this difference in certain humans directly relates to a measurable output and exchange of energy. He theorizes that there has been crossbreeding of two groups of humans over thousands of years, resulting in an energy “soup” where some people drain energy from other people. Then there are transmitters—natural givers of energy.

He is seeking “pure” examples of both for genetic testing.

A mysterious doctor sought people like my mom for some kind of genetic testing? I wondered how I could find this doctor and whether she had. I wondered if Dad or Giovanni would know of him.

Through my window, a pink sliver of sunrise crested the horizon. I put the journal in my bag. I hoped Giovanni wouldn’t mind my calling so early. I had to get out of this house, and I wanted to talk to him. My mother’s note seemed to confirm what he’d told me about different breeds of humans, and I had promised to tell him what I learned. I wished there was more to go on than the cryptic “Dr. M” in her notes.

I tiptoed downstairs to the kitchen to use the phone. Giovanni answered on the first ring.

“I’m sorry to call you so early,” I said softly.

“Miss Cora.” His voice sounded groggy, his accent more pronounced. The word Miss came out like
meeees.
“I hoped you’d call.”

“Though probably not at sunrise.”

“Anytime. Come to have espresso with me. This man does not wake without espresso.”

I could easily imagine him right now: blue eyes, half-lidded from sleep; blond, tousled hair; long body stretched out… I stopped, a fist of guilt punching my stomach. I should never think thoughts like that about Giovanni.

“Okay,” I said, “coffee sounds insane right now. I’m going to go to Christ Church after.” Guilt stabbed me again. Finn wanted to go with me. I supposed I could leave him a note to see if he wanted to meet me there.

“I will take you.”

“I’m not sure. See, Finn and I—”

Giovanni sighed impatiently into the phone. “I know about Finn and you. You don’t need to tell me. I could see it.”

I switched the phone to my other ear. God, he was being irritating. “Good. So, I’ll see you soon. I want to ask you some more questions.”

“I will answer your questions. Of course.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

“If…”

“If?”

“You meet me at the church without him.”

“What’s your problem?” My voice sounded too loud to myself, bouncing around the empty kitchen. I whispered, “You don’t even know him. I don’t even know
you
, for that matter.”

“Have you told him what you are?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No, okay, I haven’t told him about us.”

“Then I’d say you and I know each other on a whole other level.”

I faltered, irritated because it was true. It suddenly seemed wrong that I hadn’t told Finn anything about my ability or my strange aura. What was my problem? Nervousness about Faye’s warning, yes. But if I were being brutally honest with myself, it had also been fear that he might think I was really strange. Too different. Would he, this beautiful guy who had his pick of girls, have still fallen for me if he had known? My insecurity would look like distrust from Finn’s perspective.

I should tell him.

“We’ll be meeting at a church, Cora. I think you know you can trust me. I have nothing but your safety in mind, which is why I’d rather he not be there. If you want coffee, come to my hotel at eight. Otherwise, I’ll be at the church at nine.” He hung up. The bastard actually hung up! I stuffed the phone in its cradle.

“Making plans?”

I jumped. Finn stood in the doorway of the kitchen with his guitar hanging from his hand. Fatigue rimmed his eyes and tinted his aura a deep twilight blue. “You’re up early,” I said, trying to sound casual.

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“Me neither.”

“Looks like we both had someone on our minds.”

I started to come toward him, but his aura shrank back as I approached. “I’m sorry, Finn. I need to go see Giovanni.”

“Obviously.” He stared hard at me, like he was waiting for me to say something. When I didn’t, he blew out a raging, garnet breath. “I heard you, Cora. You said,
I haven’t told him about us.
” He held up his hands. The look on his face was pure pain. “So, tell me now.”

God. He’d heard me, but he’d misunderstood. “That is
not
what that comment meant. I’m just going to talk to him. His parents disappeared, too. We’re trying to help each other.”

“With all your things?” he asked, gesturing to my duffel bag at my feet.

“I think it’s smart to have everything with me. Just in case. I don’t really have a choice.”

Finn pulled a chair back from the table and plopped into it. His guitar sang out as he set it a bit roughly on the table. “Life is nothing
but
choice. Do I get up today or stay in bed? Do I turn left or right? Should I be a doctor and make my parents happy or please myself and study music? Do I stay in Ireland or do I find a way to go back to America to be with a girl who wants to spend time alone with some other bloke?”

“I don’t want him! I want to find out what happened to my mother. I need answers. Don’t you see, Finn? I don’t just need answers about
her
. I need answers about
me
. It’s like…life or death important to me. You don’t understand.”

“I understand how important this is to you. We all want to know about ourselves. Where we came from—”

“No, Finn. You
don’t
understand. You can’t possibly because there are things I’ve kept from you.”

More hurt flashed in his eyes. “Clearly.”

That whipped at the pain rising in me. I couldn’t indulge in it. Finn, his parents, they were distracting me, and I didn’t have much time left. “Seeing you again has been magic, but I didn’t come here for this. For us.
You
left me, remember? This is all confusing me and getting me off track. I have to do what I came here to do, Finn. I have to go.”

He stood abruptly and crossed the space between us. He took my face in his hands. “Are
you
trying to say good-bye now, Cora?”

I was right. Our first good-bye had been hard enough.

I swallowed hard, choking on my love for him, and answered. “You’re wrong about Giovanni and me.
You
have my heart. But my father’s likely on his way, and I have to go right now. I’m sorry.”

Thirty-Six

I

needed to get my hands on a phone book to call a cab—and perhaps I could look up doctors whose names started with M, which would probably be a major exercise in futility because she most likely wasn’t referring to the medical kind of doctor. Finn was gone. He had walked out of the kitchen without another word. I’d never forget the colors of his heartache.

The phone book was on a shelf near the phone. I flipped it open.

“What’ll you be needin’?” Uncle Clancy said as he swept into the room. God, these people were early risers. He grabbed a scone from a large jar on the counter and stuffed it in his mouth. Crumbs dotted his shirt over his round belly.

I smiled at him and his sunny aura. “I’m going to call for a ride into Dublin.”

“Come with me, child. I’m going into town to open the pub anyhow,” he said, tossing me a lemon scone.

We walked together to the car. Clancy opened the door for me, which was very sweet. I wondered if Finn was watching us as we drove away. I know Ina was. Clancy waved at her. Ina’s cold stare from the front window was the last I saw of Rising Sun Manor.

“You come all this way to see that boy of ours?”

“I’ve always wanted to come to Ireland. It’s held a certain fascination for me my whole life. You might even call it an obsession. But I have to admit,” I said, picking at the seam on my jeans, “I’m glad I got to see your boy, too.”

Possibly for the last time.
Pain rolled in my chest.

Clancy grinned through his white beard. “You’re sweet on each other, that much is clear. Do you have family here?”

“I-I’m not sure. I’m looking.”

He gave me a sideways glance and patted my arm consolingly as he parked in front of Christ Church. Giovanni leaned against a stone wall. He smiled when he saw me.

“You know him?” Clancy asked, peering at Giovanni with his eyes narrowed.

“Yes. He’s helping me, um, find my people. Well, thanks for the ride.”

“Good luck on your search, lass. I’ll be seeing you back at the house, I reckon.”

Giovanni didn’t move. After his ultimatum that had snowballed into my parting with Finn, I wasn’t in the mood to smile back. “Tell me you’ve had your espresso. Because I have a lot of questions and you’re gonna need to be alert.”

He raised one eyebrow and cocked his head, silver-blue eyes twinkling in the morning sun.

Giovanni opened the large church door for me and swept his arm in an exaggerated bow when I walked past him. I was about to start in on my list of questions, but the inside of the church vibrated with such a reverent hush I stopped in my tracks, causing Giovanni to bump into me.

“
Scusi,
” he whispered. His hand lingered on my shoulder a moment, making it tingle all the way down to the cut on my palm. I stepped away. We walked through the church in silence, awed by the ornate beauty and history. I came upon a beautiful rectangular table fashioned of scrolled iron, topped with a copper tub full of sand. Votive candles nestled in the sand, prayers for peace from pilgrims who came before us. To the right of this table was a painting with three figures—they looked to be women with ornately braided hair—seated around a pedestal table. All of them were painted with disks of light around their heads.

The longer I stared, the more sure I was. “Auras.”

Giovanni’s hushed voice answered from over my shoulder, so close his breath fell against my temple. “Of course. Go to the Bible. Even it says,
‘
There is a natural body and a spiritual body.
’
”

“I’ve seen this in paintings before. I always thought it was how the artists depicted divinity.”

A quiet, sardonic laugh came from over my shoulder. “
Sí
. The divine in all of us.”

I turned to look at him, close still, staring at me with crystalline eyes. So close, shock waves of pleasurable energy darted back and forth between our auras. We stood there a moment and gazed at each other, our silver auras flickering, competing with the luminosity of the votive candles next to us.

Giovanni’s eyes settled on my mouth and his lips parted a little. His aura pulsed faster with his heart rate, and mine sped to match. He moved his head a fraction closer. I’m sure he could see my aura flare wildly as I realized what was happening. I put my hand on his chest to stop him. “Tell me everything you know about us.”

He covered my hand with his for a moment, then held on to it and led me to a row of wooden chairs. We settled in, facing each other. Sparks ricocheted from where our knees touched. I shifted slightly. At some uncomfortable point, we were going to have to discuss the obvious energy between us. I thought it was the unique alchemy of two Scintilla, but a girl knows when she’s about to be kissed.

“Since I was a boy, I’ve been researching this. References to auras are prevalent in many cultures: ancient Egypt, India, China, all over the world. The energy that dwells within us and around us has been called by many names. Chi, kundalini, Odic force, prana, electromagnetic fields. Hell, you could even look at pop culture: Obi-Wan Kenobi and the damn Force.”

I looked around, hoping no one heard his increasingly excited rant. He softened his voice. “There is evidence everywhere of what you and I can see—in art, literature, and history. For a time, it was common to talk of someone’s
light
. Now it’s been suppressed, except in New Age circles, which sadly are not taken very seriously.”

I thought of that New Age nut from TV, Edmund Nustber, and had to agree. “Why has it been suppressed?”

Giovanni shrugged. “Why is anything true hidden away? Fear? Greed? Control? The existence of auras and spiritual energy isn’t easily provable, but there are people who are working on it, who’ve been working on it for a long time.”

“Like my mom.”

He patted my hand and pulled a Bible from the back of our chair, flipping the pages to a certain passage. “See here,” he said, pointing to Ezekiel 1:22. “‘Over the heads of the living creatures there was the likeness of an expanse, shining like awe-inspiring crystal, spread out above their heads.’”

“Wow. I feel like I’m the only person on earth who was in the dark about all of this.” Of course I was. My dad had purposely kept me in a darkened room all my life. I sighed. “Can you please explain what you meant when you said there was more than one kind of human, because my mother’s journal spoke of that, too. If Scintilla are one kind, what are the others?”

“Here’s what I believe.” He held up three fingers. “There are three breeds of human: those who give,
Scintilla
. There are the
Arrazi,
those who take.” Giovanni shrugged. “And then there’s everyone else, regular people. Though I do think some of
them
have faint traits of Scintilla or Arrazi because of family history. The people with the auras of all white, I believe they are Arrazi.”

“So, people who drain you, make you exhausted when you are around them, you’re saying they are descendants of these
takers,
the Arrazi?” That would explain people like Janelle and certainly Serena Tate. “And people like us? According to you, we are givers?”

“Yes. Though, pure Scintilla are extremely rare. We are givers of light, Cora. It is a beautiful thought, no? Problem is, the Scintilla have all but disappeared.”

“My mother. Her parents.”

“My parents.”

“
Why
are we disappearing, Giovanni? What’s happening to the Scintilla?” It was odd saying the name like I was talking about characters in a mythic tale.

He leaned close. I could smell the hint of espresso on his breath. His aura collided with my own again, and I felt a sudden infusion of
scintillating
energy. “You want to know what I think is happening to the Scintilla?” He looked around. “I think we are being hunted by the Arrazi.”

On instinct, my hands pressed together in front of me. I didn’t like the sound of being someone’s prey. I’d had a taste of that in California.

“We’re being wiped out. I don’t know the reason. If I did, maybe I could stop it. I couldn’t stop it—” His eyes misted over with a teary film. His voice suddenly choked, and his raw emotion choked me up as well. Of course he would be emotional. He’d lost his parents so young. I’d been searching for answers for a few weeks. He had been searching his whole life.

“It’s too late for our parents. I’m sorry, but I believe that in my heart,” he said with such surety it threatened to shatter my hope. “We will never see them again. But we are here.” He reached out to me, but his hand hovered inches from my skin. The contact was as real as if his hand cradled my face. He dropped his hand and stared intently into my eyes. “I thought there was no hope. Until you showed up. There must be a reason we’re both here together, Cora.”

“What reason?”

“To find out the truth. To protect the givers of light in this world.” My hand was taken up in his. “To protect each other.”

The chill of vulnerability slid over me. Like a baby deer in a wide-open field. “How do you know who’s doing the hunting?”

“Like any prey, we have natural enemies. I’d heard the word Arrazi more than once in my life. And I watched people
feed
, it’s the only way I can say it. One man took another man’s aura in a pub. At first I watched with interest because I’d seen the give and take of energy, but not one so blatant, so violent. I had no idea he was killing him until the man slumped over.” Giovanni snapped his fingers, making me jump. “Lights out. And the taker, his aura turned pure white, like that man at the airport we saw when the old couple died.”

I gasped. “Yes. I know.” I could barely breathe with the memory of it. “And there was one in California, too.”

Giovanni’s eyes went wide. He touched my hand.

“I saw him kill two women. He tried to kill me. It was the most terrifying thing I’ve ever been through.”

His mouth opened in surprise. “It’s true then, what I’ve heard. There are a few Scintilla scattered everywhere. And where we are, there is the Arrazi.”

“But the woman he killed, she wasn’t like us. She had a normal aura. Colorful.”

“As did the poor man in the pub.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “There must be a reason they are killing regular people, too. We need to find out. I think there is a man who has been following me. He could be Arrazi. If we could follow him—”

I jumped to my feet. “I’m not volunteering to be bait for some soul-suckers!” An elderly couple looked over at me with shocked expressions. The woman crossed herself.

Giovanni got up and took my elbow, leading me deeper into the heart of the church. “If we could find out
why
they are killing and
why
there are so few Scintilla left in the world—”

I shook my head. “I came here to find out any information I could about my mother. I want to know about
her.
About myself. This is all too much.” I started to cry, overcome. “I want to go home.”

Giovanni pulled me into a hug. He was so tall that my face landed squarely in the middle of his chest. I could hear his heart rumble against my wet cheek, feel our auras commune and wrap us in an electrical storm.

One of us should pull away.

“Miss Cora.” When I didn’t answer, he held me back at arm’s length. I blinked my tears away and looked up at him. “I know you’re scared,” he murmured, brushing my tears with the pads of his fingers. “I bet our parents were scared. We can’t let them down. Please don’t run back home. You’ve already said there is a killer there. If he comes after you—”

“He already has.”

He squeezed my upper arms with a gentle shake. “You must understand, until we find out what they are after, we can’t hope to stop them. Please help me do that.”

I had to look away from his pleading eyes.

My gaze landed on a statue nestled in a marble column. Out of one smooth green-gold stone was carved a statue of Madonna and child. She held her child in front of her heart. I walked over, touched my palm to the smooth curve of the mother’s head, and ran one finger over the baby’s head. It didn’t look like a baby at all.

It looked like a mother and a little girl.

Turn right, turn left. Stay here or go home. Get up in the morning and attack life, or stay in bed and pretend you aren’t a motherless child who has seen murder right in front of your eyes. It was as Finn had said, all choices.

If I left now, I was no better than my father. Even if my mother was dead, I couldn’t abandon her again. I finally appreciated her quest to uncover the truth. It wasn’t just herself she was concerned about. She worried about me. About everyone like us. She was trying to understand the truth about humanity. I had to carry on in her place.

Giovanni approached, but he stopped shy of reaching me.

“I’ll help,” I said. “For as long as I can.”