‘Go on.’
‘I shouldn’t have started this, I feel much cheaper than I am accusing you of being, sitting here throwing back all your generosity to me and to my family…’
Geraldine just sat, calm and motionless.
‘You forced me to say it. I see now why you didn’t feel upset being in Peter Murphy’s house… you never cared about them, not one little bit, it was all for this…’ She made a sweeping gesture around the room and its style. Her face was red and upset. Geraldine seemed unmoved. ‘So what do you have to say to me? You said you wanted me to tell you and now I have. Is it going to be a stony silence?’
‘No, Cathy, but nor is it going to be one word of apology, not one.’
‘You’re proud of all this?’
‘I’m neither proud not ashamed, it’s a way to live.’
‘And you never loved any of them, that’s right, isn’t it?’
‘I loved Teddy,’ Geraldine said.
‘Teddy?’
‘Oh, I loved Teddy and he loved me, but not enough to leave his wife for me.’
‘But that was back a long time ago. People didn’t then.’
It was twenty-two years ago, not the Dark Ages, and people
did
leave home and start again, as Teddy said he would, and as I believed he would, particularly when I was pregnant.’ Cathy stared at her. ‘But it turned out not to be the case.’ The voice was very flat. Cathy hardly dared to move. ‘And we agreed that the timing was all spectacularly bad, I can’t remember what, one of his children going to school or leaving school or hating school or loving school. Some bloody thing. Does it matter?’ Cathy took a sharp breath. This was horrifying. ‘But it meant that there could be no baby.’ A long pause. ‘I
could
have kept the baby. But then I knew I’d lose Teddy, so I lost the baby instead. A friend of his was a doctor, not a great doctor, as it happened, and I had left it too late so that complicated it, and I don’t think this doctor was entirely sober at the time. So after that, no more babies, ever.’
‘Geraldine.’ Cathy was stricken.
‘So after that, as you can understand, I was a bit low, but I thought I’d have Teddy to comfort me, but as it happened I didn’t. He was nervous. I had become a loose cannon on the deck, and he took his family and went abroad. So, Cathy, it sounds very dramatic but I didn’t allow myself to wallow too much in the luxury of love after that. The men I’ve known since and who have been my friends like my company and conversation just as much as my bed and my wearing lacy underwear. I have not been dependent on
any
of them for
anything
. They can’t offer me commitment or a home, so they give me watches and that silk rug on the floor in front of you. But I’m sorry if it
upsets
you and you think
less
of me and that it’s, what did you say,
tacky
,’ she repeated Cathy’s accusations with great emphasis. ‘That’s all I can say. I’m sorry if it offends you, but it doesn’t offend me, and it’s my life.’
I’m so ashamed I could die,’ Cathy said.
Geraldine sighed. ‘Leave it, Cathy. You had guts to say it, I give you that much. And what was the other thing that was upsetting you, the one that didn’t have to do with me?’
Cathy spoke slowly. ‘I don’t suppose there could be any more inappropriate thing to tell you, but I think I might be pregnant, and it’s the last thing on earth I want now.’
‘What time is she coming?’ Tom asked. ‘Who?’
‘Well excuse
me
, but I thought all this shining and polishing and getting out the best linen was to impress your mother-in-law,’ Tom said.
‘Oh, sorry Tom, I was miles away. Hannah’s coming about half past twelve.’
‘Let’s get the skates on then, and go and make some soup,’ he suggested.
Cathy leaped up guiltily. Tom had been here since five a.m., and she had been barely able to get in by nine. The bread had been delivered to Haywards, he had stopped at the fish shop on the way back, he had got all the vegetables and a huge lamb bone for a big soup order, he had already made her two cups of coffee and she had done nothing. Of course she hadn’t told Neil last night. There had been no time. After the hours of crying in Geraldine’s flat she had felt drained. Neil had been distracted, stuck in his books. And as Geraldine had soothed and consoled her over and over, it might be a false alarm. She must get a Predictor first, from the chemist, and then go to a doctor. Then and only then should she tell Neil.
‘Tom, I’m so sorry. Here, pass me over the knife, I’ll start chopping the basil and tomatoes.’
‘She’ll think it’s tinned,’ he objected.
‘No she won’t, so what, anyway?’
‘
You’ve
got very courageous suddenly,’ he said.
‘No, I’m still terrified of her, but at least now I know there’s no pleasing her, so that helps a bit.’ Cathy’s eyes were a little too bright.
‘I don’t think you should have a knife in your hand this morning,’ Tom said. ‘You’ll be in ribbons by the time she comes. Leave the dangerous stuff to me.’
‘Great. So what do I do?’
‘Set the table, get some flowers.’
They had a great bank of flowerpots in a wheelbarrow in their courtyard. Whenever they wanted a table decoration they just lifted out a pot of primulas, pansies or begonias, cleaned it around the edges and placed it in a brass container. When the function or the need to impress was over, the plant went back outdoors.
‘That doesn’t sound very much,’ Cathy said.
‘And start practising your smile. Remember the last time Hannah Mitchell was here? You were shouting at her like a fishwife about her coat and your mother and assorted other topics.’
‘Oh, we’ve all mellowed since those days,’ Cathy said loftily.’I think we’d need to have,’ said Tom, who had already got the stock into the soup saucepan and begun the work.
‘Imagine, we’ll be going home on the bus today,’ Simon said to Maud.
‘By ourselves, no Muttie,’ Maud said.
‘He said he might happen to be walking by the school sometimes, and he’d walk us to the bus,’ Simon said.
‘But he’s probably going to the shoemaker’s or the bookmaker’s, it’s not really on his way,’ Maud worried.
‘How else will we ever see Hooves?’ Simon said, and they looked at each other in concern. It hadn’t been actually said, but they knew that social visits to St Jarlath’s Crescent were going to be very few and far between.
‘You’re a very sweet girl, you know, Geraldine,’ Freddie said as they had coffee together in her office. He had called in to discuss the Italian villa presentation, which would be upcoming soon. But they were also talking about his own party, for which Geraldine’s niece and her partner were going to do the catering.
‘I know I am,’ Geraldine said. I’m totally delightful, but in what particular way at the moment?’
‘You’re as anxious as I am that the party Pauline and I are having will be a success,’ he said in some wonder.
‘But why ever not, Freddie? I don’t want anything from you except what I have, your company, your interest, your concern, your wonderful loving… Why
should
I not be interested and wish it all well?’
‘You’re amazing. You really mean it.’ Freddie Flynn had not come across such women before.
‘You know what the French used to say about a mistress. She must be discreet, and never, ever do anything that would upset the man’s family, his children and certainly not his property…’ She laughed engagingly at him.
‘You ask so little, Geraldine,’ he said in a throaty voice.
‘But that’s not true, and truly I have so much.’ She waved her hand around the office, the business that was hers alone. The hand that she waved had a jewelled watch on the wrist.
‘So Cathy will come round to the house and set it all up with Pauline, will she?’
‘Yes, Cathy or Tom, they take it turn by turn. He’s just as good,’ Geraldine said.
She hoped it would be Tom that made the visit. The way poor Cathy was behaving at the moment, she wouldn’t be able to keep her eye on the ball at all.
‘Nice to see you, Mrs Mitchell, and don’t you look well.
‘Thank you, Shona,’ Hannah patted her hair. ‘I’ve just had a glorious hour in the salon. I’m going to have lunch with Cathy, as it happens. I thought I’d buy her a little gift. What do you suggest?’
‘Well, now, if it were anyone else I’d say a loaf of that delicious bread that Scarlet Feather does for us, but you’ll be having that anyway… Flowers are always nice, a fancy soap maybe?’
‘The bread doing well, is it?’
‘We can’t keep it on the shelves or in the restaurant. I told Tom that we’re going to have to make him an offer he can’t refuse and come and work here full-time.’
‘Imagine.’ Hannah was surprised.
‘Anyway, enjoy your lunch, Mrs Mitchell. Lots of people would envy you, you know.’
‘Yes, I’m beginning to realise that,’ Hannah said in a disapproving voice.
She still found it hard to accept that she was lucky to begetting a meal cooked for her by the maid’s daughter. But she
must
not think like that, or else something would slip out as it so often did for absolutely no reason at all, and then everyone took horrific offence and Neil sighed and Jock sighed and Cathy went totally berserk. Don’t say [_poor _]Lizzie. It was just an expression, but try telling that to Cathy Scarlet.
James Byrne had decided to cook a dinner that night. Not the real one, not the one he was rehearsing for, but just to see whether he could or not. And as it happened, Martin Maguire was going to be in Dublin. He would try it out on him. He took out Cathy and Tom’s meticulous instructions – they had even typed out advice about the shopping. It was a Monday morning, he had nothing else to do with his time, he would go to the market that they had suggested with their list in hand. Martin Maguire would be very surprised indeed to be presented with such a gourmet meal. And it would be great practice for James. He had enjoyed those two evenings with Tom and Cathy enormously, and wished he could think of an excuse for more. But he must remember that this had been his undoing before. Becoming too fond of people, too dependent. It must not happen again.
‘This house will never be the same,’Muttie said when the children had left for school. ‘Those people won’t get the children to do their homework the way we did.’ He shook his head sadly.
‘They’d know more than we do,’ Lizzie said.
It had always worried her, looking after the children of the quality in her own home.
This was something that had never worried Muttie. ‘It’s a matter of discipline,’ he said firmly. ‘This house has proper rules and regulations.’ And at that, he got out the paper and studied the racing pages, while Hooves laid his sad black head on his knee, and the woman that the children still called Muttie’s wife got ready to leave a house that had proper rules and regulations to go out and clean the apartments and houses of the quality.
Joe Feather called his brother.
‘Could I buy you a nice pint and a plate of sausages for lunch?’ he offered.
‘God, I’d love it Joe, but it has to be late. I’m setting up a lunch here for Cathy’s mother-in-law!’
‘Is it a big do?’
‘No, only the two of them.’
‘God, you’ve fallen on hard times, a lunch for two people. Have I invested in a Mickey Mouse company?’
‘No, you fool, it’s a social thing.’
They fixed a place to meet.
‘Give Cathy my love. Thank her for everything yesterday.’ Joe hung up.
‘Hey, you didn’t say you met my brother yesterday,’ Tom said.
‘Tom, I haven’t said anything this morning. I’m like a zombie. I met him at Geraldine’s, and he was a great help about the Chicago wedding. Actually he really was, I meant to tell you. I took lots of notes.’
‘Geraldine’s, no less?’
‘Yeah, but they weren’t thinking of withdrawing their funding or anything, it was about this fashion show he’s putting on.’
‘I know, Marcella’s going to be one of the models, isn’t it great?’
‘Great,’ said Cathy, wondering whether Tom knew that it was mainly lingerie that his girlfriend would be modelling.
‘Come in, Mrs Mitchell.’ Tom’s smile rarely failed to hit its target.
‘Oh, hallo, er… Tom, isn’t it?’
‘It is indeed, Mrs Mitchell, and how well you’re looking, if I may say so.’
She patted her hair again. It was so wise to go to a good salon regularly. Cathy was so foolish in this regard, as in so many things.
‘I didn’t know that we were all going to… I mean
‘No, no, I’m just serving you and then making myself scarce.’
‘I heard you do marvellous bread for Haywards.’
‘Thank you so much, they’re very kind about it. I’ve left you a little selection to try, and also a packet to take home.’
Eventually the Tom Feather smile had worked. Hannah Mitchell was smiling back.
‘You are a kind boy,’ she said, as so many middle-aged, middle-class matrons had said to him over the last few months.
Cathy stood waiting, in a pink and lilac summer print dress that did her no favours, her face as white as a sheet, her hair tied back with an elastic band.
‘You’re welcome, Hannah,’ she said in a flat voice.
‘It’s a pleasure to be here, and my goodness doesn’t the place look nice!’
She looked around, and Tom hoped that Cathy would respond warmly to her, otherwise all this would be in vain. To his relief, Cathy was smiling.
‘This is our front room, where we sit clients down and persuade them to have much bigger parties than they intended,’ she said.
‘Very nicely done,’ Hannah looked around her with grudging admiration. ‘Nice colours, too.’
‘My mother made the curtains and covers,’ Cathy said proudly.
Hannah looked at them in disbelief. ‘Oh, Lizzie was always… marvellous with her hands,’ she said eventually.
Tom sighed with relief, poured them a sherry and went to the kitchen.
‘Tom, will you either eat that sandwich or throw it away, but for God’s sake stop analysing it,’ Joe said, laughing at the way his younger brother was unpicking all the ingredients.
‘Look at what they charge for that, Joe, no seriously, look at it. A tired tomato, a piece of plastic cheese, a dead leaf of lettuce, half a hard-boiled, discoloured egg… A smear of cheap salad cream… And they dare to call that a Summer Salad Sandwich. What do visitors to this country think, tell me what do they say… ?’