Scarecrow (2 page)

“Rest easy now. We can talk about all of it later on.”

“But you don’t understand—no one understands.”
Oh, Brad, I can’t, I can’t do anything without you, why did you have to die and leave me so afraid of living…
My eyes snapped back to her face. “I’m not crazy,” I said defensively, yet part of me seemed to be standing apart, gazing in mute horror at the wild-eyed, rambling patient in the bed. “I’m not. I acted like it before, but that was a long time ago, and I’m fine now. You’ve got to believe me.”

“But I do believe you.”

“Someone was here. A man. I didn’t dream that.”

“No. That was Seth.” She said that name as if I should have recognized it.

“Then I’m not in a hospital. He’s not a doctor.”

“Seth,” she said again. “Why, he’s hardly left your room since he brought you here.”

I stared at her, reality struggling slowly into my thick brain.

“I’m Rachel Whittaker,” she went on, pouring a strange-smelling liquid into a cup. “And Franny—she’s gone to get the bread. You’re in our house. And you don’t have to be worried about anything, cause there’s nobody here who’ll hurt you. There now.” She handed me the cup, steadying my hand with her own. “Drink this nice and slow. You have to get your strength back.”

I hesitated, but she guided the cup to my mouth. Whatever it was tasted terrible, but it did succeed in warming a path to my empty stomach. For a minute I thought it might come up again, and I shook my head, pushing the cup away. “What
is
that?”

“Just some herb tea. Now, don’t you fret. I know how to make lots of things to help you feel better. Just a little more,” Rachel coaxed, and as I steeled myself for another swallow, Franny bounced back into the room.

“Oh, Rachel, she looks mighty awful—”

“Shush!” Rachel cast the girl a withering look, and my fingers crept cautiously up to my head before Rachel could gently lower them.

“Do I? I feel like I do. I’m sorry…I feel so strange.”

“No need for
you
to be sorry,” Rachel chided good-naturedly. “I reckon Franny was under the porch when they passed the manners.”

“Sorry,” Franny grinned, not looking sorry at all. “So what are you doing wandering around out here all by yourself?”

“Franny,” Rachel sighed and passed me a half-filled bowl of broth. “Just try to eat as much as you can. And this bread—just try it.”

“I really don’t think I—”

“Please.” Her voice was so kind that I found myself trying to eat, just to please her. The broth was rich and golden, and after the first forced mouthful, it was easier to get down.

“So what’s your name?” Franny demanded. “You do remember your name, don’t you?”

Rachel gave her a warning look, but I spoke up tentatively. My head suddenly felt very heavy. “Pamela. Pamela Westbrook.” They stared at me with no sign of recognition and I stared back.
But why should they know the name…Brad’s reputation as an artist was mainly on the West Coast…

“Well, you surely don’t look like you’re from around these parts, Pamela Westbrook,” Franny cocked her head at me.

“No. I’m from…” The room seemed to sway a little, and I gripped the edge of the bed to steady myself.
That’s not a hard question, I know the answer to that…
“I’m from California.”

“California!” Franny’s eyes widened. “Well, I’ve surely heard of that! What on earth are you doing way out here?”

Rachel didn’t say anything, but busied herself smoothing the covers at the foot of the bed.

“But that’s what I’m trying to tell you,” I said earnestly, trying to sit up, wincing from the effort. “I’m supposed to be in St. Louis. I’m surprising my sister in St. Louis, only I got lost, and I couldn’t find the highway—”

“The highway? Well, you
are
off the track,” Franny giggled. “You’re not even close to where you want to go.”

“Then where am I? You haven’t told me where I am.”

“Mercy,” Rachel sighed. “You’re just about as far from anywhere as you can be. It’s a wonder you even got yourself found at all.”

“Ozarks,” I mumbled. “I was driving through the Ozarks.”

“Yes, that’s right. See, you
do
remember something, don’t you?”

“He always said it was beautiful…that’s why he wanted to paint it someday…he said it was beautiful…”

“Who, honey? Who said that?” Rachel’s face swam before me, and I swallowed hard, trying to follow her with my eyes.

“Why, Brad. Brad said that before…” I frowned. “It was my doctor’s idea, to take a trip. Not mine. I’ve made a mess of things…”

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Rachel said. “Everything’s just fine. Just fine.”

“Only I wanted to come through the Ozarks because he always said it was so beautiful this time of year…”
But you never want to get stranded there, he’d said, you never want to get stranded in the Ozarks because there are back-hill places you’d never find your way out of, ever again…

I glanced up guiltily as Rachel’s kind voice brought me back. “What did you say? Someone’s name?”

“Brad,” I said, my throat tightening, that choking, dying feeling I’d lived with since the funeral. “I must have said Brad. I’m sorry. It doesn’t matter.”

Rachel and Franny exchanged looks, and I blurted out, “But I thought I was on some sort of main road. How could I have gotten lost that quickly?”

“Oh, there’s lots of back roads around these parts that folks don’t know about,” Franny nodded wisely. “It’s easy to get lost before you realize.”

A chill crept up my spine. “But I didn’t feel lost, not at first, I felt like…didn’t I tell you? Like I was being led…” I looked toward the door, my breath coming out in a gasp. “Can you get me my clothes now? I have to go.”

“You’re still too weak to be going anywhere,” Rachel said matter-of-factly. “And you shouldn’t be up doing too much too soon. That bump on your head needs time to heal itself up. And those scratches, too.”

Once more I groped at my bandage. The room was moving again, a faded merry-go-round of old furniture and calm, watchful faces. “But if it was really that serious, I’d be in a hospital.”

Franny looked up, eyes bright. “But we don’t have hospitals around here. No doctors, either. It was Girlie who said you’d come around in three days, and you did.”

I stared at her, her words disappearing down a long, echoing tunnel. “Girlie?”

“Girlie,” Rachel said. “She’s my little one. She’s the one who saved you.”

“But you said…someone named Seth—”

“Rachel’s husband,” Franny finished. “He found you. But it was Girlie who told him where to look. She just had that knowing again about somebody in trouble. No, we don’t have doctors here. Don’t need any. Girlie takes care of all that.” She glanced toward the hallway as a door slammed downstairs. “There’s Micah—I gotta go help.”

“Don’t be late for supper,” Rachel called after her, then turned back to me. “Micah won’t care if you use his room while you’re here. He can have the storeroom downstairs.”

“Wait…about Girlie…I’m afraid I don’t—”

“Course not,” she smiled apologetically. “But it’s really simple. Girlie has the Knowing. The Gift. It’s God-given, you see. She’s always had it. It’s what she was born for.”

Her face flickered before my eyes…half scar, half shadow. I felt myself sinking into darkness, every limb strangely detached now and free from pain.

“It’s the tea, isn’t it?” I murmured. “I have to leave…”

“But you just got here,” Rachel smiled.

And my eyes sank heavily…opened again to find the room dusky and very still.

“Someone…” I pleaded. “Is someone there?”

“Watch her.”
came the whisper, stroking at the delicate edges of consciousness.
“Watch her close.”

It was the same thing I’d heard the doctor say…after Brad and Kerry’s funeral…after I’d taken the bottle of sleeping pills…

“Brad?” I forced my eyes open, terrified, sensing again that someone was very near. “Who are you? Who’s there?”

But the figure in the doorway was shrouded in darkness and watching…just watching as I sank into blessed oblivion.

“R
ACHEL?”

It was my own voice this time, not a dream, and as I struggled out of sleep, there was a rustle in the darkness that slid along the wall and out through the door, even as terror jolted me fully awake.

The room was pitch-black now, save for one pale moonbeam wavering in from the window. It was like being suspended in that last, lingering uncertainty of a nightmare, and as I gathered my wits about me, I realized that I actually
had
called out, and that my own cry had awoken me.

I’d been dreaming that someone was in my room.

With shaking hands, I pulled the quilt off the bed and drew it around my shoulders, hobbling to the window. A sickly yellow moon hovered above the trees, transforming them to skeletons clawing their way from foggy graves. I could see the muddy outline of hills all around, shapes shifting themselves in the darkness below, and from the deep, surrounding silence came the hollow call of an owl. The night had turned my room absolutely freezing. Shivering, I lowered the window and leaned for a moment against the ledge. How long had I been asleep this time? And where was everyone?

Oh, God, what am I going to do, how am I going to get out of here—

I stiffened, clutching the sill.

There—just off through a tangle of foliage—I could have sworn I’d seen something just then. A figure. Tall. Silent. So still that I’d mistaken it for a tree until it lengthened and became one with the bottomless shadows beneath the branches.

I leaned forward, trying to pierce the darkness.

Nothing.

Wrapping the quilt tighter, I moved cautiously out into the hall. For one split second I was filled with a wild hope that I really
had
been dreaming, dreaming everything that had happened, and that when I stepped out of my room, I would be in my own house, in my own familiar hallway, alone with my memories. But I didn’t know this hallway I was in now, and after groping along the wall for several minutes, I gave up trying to find a light switch and concentrated instead on where it would lead me.

The passageway seemed endless. Every creaking board underfoot stopped me in a cold sweat. Was it me making that noise—or was it someone else I couldn’t see? An invisible someone who had just been in my room, watching me as I slept?

“Rachel?” The hall was an icy black tunnel. I extended both arms out to my sides, guiding myself between the walls. As I took another step, my right hand slid into nothingness, and after one heart-stopping second, I realized I’d found another doorway on the same wall as my own.

Taking a deep breath, I leaned slowly forward, craning my neck around the door frame, terrified that someone might be looking back at me. But the threshold was empty, and the one tiny window in the room was so poorly illuminated that all I could make out was a small cot beneath it.

I continued down the corridor, pushing back the darkness with my hands. Without warning, I clutched air again, nearly falling into another open doorway to my left, but catching myself quickly and moving on. Gratefully I saw a glimmer of light ahead, and as I walked toward it, realized that someone had left a chimney lamp burning on a table beneath a window.

I was at the end of the hall. As the muffled sound of voices drifted up behind me, I spun around and saw that I had actually sidestepped a stairwell, had just barely missed the yawning hole in the floor. It was a miracle I hadn’t fallen right down the steps.

“Rachel?” I called softly, but the voices below were laughing, and my call went unheard. As I hesitated, trying to decide whether or not to risk the stairs, there was a sigh from beneath the window, very near the floor—and as I watched, frozen, a low shadow began moving toward me.

It touched my hand.

And as it turned to the light, my heart tore in two.

It was a child.

Not Kerry…don’t be silly…Kerry’s dead…some other child…someone else’s child…
And yet as I stared down in mingled fear and relief I had to keep telling myself
a child, a child,
for it looked like no child I had ever seen before.

The little girl’s head seemed almost too large for her delicate body, yet at the same time too small for her huge, round eyes. Her hair was chopped at different angles around her face, as if someone had haphazardly taken scissors to it in the dark. As she gazed intently up at me, her eyes were dark oversized saucers in her pale face, her brows drawn worriedly together as if she’d just been scolded and couldn’t quite make up her mind to cry. There was a soft pout on her mouth, curving the corners downward, but her upper lip protruded slightly and she hardly had a chin at all. Her fingers were curled in the folds of a baggy shift that hung to her ankles, and as I looked from the child’s bare feet to her solemn expression, I scarcely dared to breathe for fear of frightening her. “Girlie?” I whispered.

She didn’t answer, only tugged at my hand which she still held and began leading me slowly down the stairs.

We came out into another hallway, the stairs facing a large door that I assumed was the front door to the house. From somewhere down the hall behind us drifted the warm, fading fragrance of food. Just ahead of us and to the left was where the voices were, and as we paused in the open threshold, the talking gave way to startled silence.

At first I couldn’t see anything at all. The flickering light and shadows were such a contrast to the utter blackness of the hallway that for a moment all I could do was blink and put up my free hand to fend off the glare. Wishing I’d never left my bed, I turned to go, when Rachel’s voice stopped me.

“Why, Pamela, you shouldn’t be up out of bed—you’re not strong enough yet to be taking those stairs!” Capable arms circled my shoulders at once and despite my weak show of resistance, guided me into the room.

“I didn’t want to bother you,” I said. “I thought I could find my way, only there wasn’t a light—”

“Why, bless you, we don’t have electricity. You could have hurt yourself for sure.” Rachel smoothed my hair back, smiling. “I would have let you sleep, but now that you’re up, I’ll bring you some supper.”