Saving Ren (Barretti Security Series, Book 3) (17 page)

Chapter 10

Declan impatiently tapped on the edge of the keyboard in front of him as he glanced at his cell phone. He cursed himself and pushed the button but nothing but the time appeared on the screen. He’d been doing the same thing for the past thirty minutes. He turned his attention back to his computer but couldn’t focus on what he was looking at so he finally reached for the phone again. Before he could even dial, the phone lit up, but it was Dom’s name that appeared. The rush of guilt that he always felt when he saw or heard any reference to Dom or Vin went through him but he knew he couldn’t keep avoiding the men forever. He and Jagger had decided to hold off on telling Ren the truth about Rafe’s reappearance after Ren’s admission about Brandon. The two weeks they’d watch Ren spiral into a haunting depression had scared both of them to death and they’d been on the verge of reaching out to Ren’s brothers when Ren finally seemed to snap out of it. And then he’d said those words…those amazing, fucking perfect words.

“Hey Dom,” Declan said into the phone.

“Hey, how are you?”

“Good. How are Cade and Rafe?”

“Doing good. Cade’s happy to finally have the cast off and he’ll be back at work next week. Rafe’s been volunteering at the foundation and has even consulted on a few jobs for me and Vin.”

Declan felt another jolt of guilt go through him at how good Dom sounded. The man was finally getting back on track after the devastating truth about Rafe’s childhood and Declan was going to end up shattering it again when Dom found out about his betrayal.

“That’s great. Glad to hear it.”

“So I never heard back from you about the party this weekend.”

Shit, he’d completely forgotten about the invite to the party Logan and Dom were throwing for Riley and Gabe to welcome their new baby girl into the world.

“Right, sorry. I’ve actually got some things I need to do this weekend.”

Dom’s silence was heavy on the other end of the phone.

“Declan, I’m worried about you.”

“What?” Declan asked. “Why?”

“Hale!”

Declan snapped his eyes up at the sound of his name being shouted from across the room and saw Mitchell striding towards him, file folder in hand. The man hadn’t spoken to him in the week since he’d returned to the office but he’d gotten his fair share of murderous looks in every time he stalked past Declan’s desk.

“Dom, I gotta go. Give Gabe and Riley my best, okay?”

“Okay.”

Mitchell dumped the file on Declan’s desk. “Some kids found a body down by the docks. Go check it out.”

“Sure thing, Captain,” Declan said, making sure to let the disrespect drip from his voice. Mitchell’s ruddy face tightened but he kept his mouth shut as he stomped back to his office and slammed the door.

Declan grabbed the folder and his jacket and made his way to his car. He hit the speed dial on his phone and waited anxiously for Jagger to pick up.

“How is he?” he asked before Jagger could even say hello.

“Still in with the doctor,” Jagger said.

“Fuck, is that good or bad?”

“How the hell do I know?” Jagger muttered. After a moment he said, “Sorry.”

The apology wasn’t necessary since Jagger was undoubtedly as anxious as Declan was. It had been Connor who’d helped them find a therapist for Ren since he’d interacted with several as part of his volunteer work at the VA.

“I’ve got a case I need to work tonight so I’ll be home late. Will you ask him to call me later?”

“Yeah. Stay safe.”

“I will. See you soon.”

Declan hung up the phone and couldn’t help but smile when he realized he’d said “home.” How long had it been since he could say that he’d actually looked forward to going home? Easy. Never.

***

Jagger pushed the plastic container across the bar to Connor.

“What is it?” Connor asked curiously as he eagerly pulled the top off.

“Païdakia.”

“Yes,” Connor muttered. “Your mom makes the best lamb chops,” he added as he began searching behind the bar for something.

“I made them,” Jagger said.

Connor stilled and then carefully put the lid back on the container and slid it back to him. “Uh, no thanks.”

“Fuck you,” Jagger laughed. “Try it.”

Connor frowned but then pulled out the fork he’d been searching for and reached for the container.

“Holy shit, this is amazing,” Connor said as he stabbed his fork into another piece of the meat. “Since when do you cook?” Connor asked.

Jagger couldn’t hide the smile that spread across his face. He wanted to say since he had two men living with him whose strength he needed to keep up since none of them could stop fucking each other’s brains out night after night, but he figured that was TMI even for his best friend so he kept his mouth shut.

But Connor let out a loud laugh in between bites. “Don’t tell me you’re playing house?” he finally managed to get out. “Jagger ‘Fuck ‘em and leave ‘em’ Varos?”

“Bite me, asshole,” Jagger responded.

“Would there even be enough room for me?” Connor quipped.

“Things keeping you pretty busy around here?” Jagger asked even though the nearly empty bar answered that question for him. He really hoped like hell that Mags had another source of income.

“Nope, no subject change. A soldier and a cop – how the hell did someone who hates taking orders as much as you do end up with guys like that?”

Jagger felt heat flood his face as he remembered the orders he’d taken last night. He’d done every single thing Ren and Declan had demanded of him and he’d been handsomely rewarded.

“Mags, get out here. You gotta see this!” Connor suddenly yelled.

Jagger bit off a curse and took a slap at Connor who managed to step back in time.

“What is it?” Mags responded as she appeared from the back room.

“Jagger’s blushing.”

“No shit,” Mags said in awe as she walked behind the bar.

“Fucker,” Jagger growled.

Connor laughed heartily until Mags saw what he was eating. “What the hell is this?” she asked. Connor swallowed hard.

“Lamb,” Jagger answered for him.

“So you’ll try this nasty shit but not my Haggis?”

“Mags-” Connor began to say.

“He loves it Mags. My mom’s been making it for him almost every week since he moved here.”

“Asshole,” Connor muttered under his breath.

Mags gave him a dirty look and turned her back on him before storming towards the back.

“Fuck, that one’s gonna cost me,” Connor said as he shoved another piece of meat into his mouth. “So how are things going besides you finding your inner chef?”

“Better than I thought possible.”

“They’re both still staying with you?” Connor asked.

Jagger nodded. It was funny because the topic of the three of them staying together once they’d returned to the city hadn’t even come up. His townhouse had been the easy choice because of the extra space and Declan had gone to his apartment only long enough to get more clothes.

“How’s Ren?”

“He’s making progress. He seems to like Dr. Barnes.”

At first Jagger had been worried after Ren’s first meeting with the therapist because he’d been surprisingly quiet about the whole thing after the session ended. But he’d gone back two days later and hadn’t balked when the doctor had suggested group therapy as well.

“Glad to hear it.”

Jagger fell silent for a moment before asking, “Sutter been bothering you at all?”

Connor shrugged but didn’t answer him.

“Tell me,” Jagger said.

Connor sighed and put down the fork. “He calls. Leaves messages.”

Jagger felt himself tensing up. “What kind of messages?”

“Jagger, stop, please. Go home. Be with your men.”

“Damn it, Connor, tell me about the messages!”

“No,” Connor said firmly. “Go home.”

Frustration went through Jagger. “Why won’t you tell me?”

Connor sighed and reached his hand out to cover Jagger’s. “Because I need to deal with this myself. I love that you want to protect me but I need to know that I can take care of myself – that I can still be the man I was before this happened,” Connor said as he tapped the side of his head.

“Let me at least talk to Declan about getting a restraining order.”

Connor smiled and shook his head slightly. “I already got one. Now go home. I’ve got customers.”

Jagger looked down the bar and saw that the only other patron was passed out with his forehead pressed against the top of the bar.

“Right,” Jagger said with a chuckle. As much as he hated not being able to take care of the shit with Sutter, he understood what Connor was asking of him. He climbed off the barstool but turned to glance at Connor. “Promise me you’ll call me if you need me.”

“Promise,” Connor said. “And thanks,” he added as he held up the half empty container.

Jagger nodded and headed towards the door.

***

Ren left the building and walked towards his car. It felt strange to be alone for the first time in the nearly three months that had passed since Jagger had broken down that cabin door and he and Declan had changed the course of Ren’s life forever. He’d half expected Jagger or Declan to follow him this morning when he’d gotten in his car to head to his therapy session but if they had, Ren hadn’t seen them. Not that he could blame them considering the gamut his emotions had run since their return to the city.

While his nightmares had lessened and he didn’t jump at every strange sound, he still struggled with the fear that he would have an episode where he ended up hurting someone. It was the one thing still holding him back from reaching out to his brothers. In the end, it had been his therapist who had convinced him that he was ready to do something as simple as driving himself back and forth to his sessions. Jagger and Declan had both been supportive but hadn’t rushed him either. They’d continued to manipulate their work schedules so that Ren was never alone at home but Ren knew that was something he needed to put an end to as well.

The drive to Jagger’s townhouse took less than ten minutes and he quickly pulled his car into the garage and hurried into the house. He knew it was silly to be excited over something as simple as having made it through a few hours on his own but it was so much more than that to him. It was the first step to getting his life back – to getting his family back. But more importantly, it meant maybe he’d finally start to feel like an equal member in his relationship with Jagger and Declan. He’d no longer be the weak link that needed protecting and coddling…he’d be able to give as much to his men as he took.

As Ren entered the kitchen, he saw Jagger sitting at the kitchen table. He could tell by the fact that Declan’s car hadn’t been parked on the street that only Jagger was home but he was surprised when Jagger didn’t seem to notice his entry. In fact, Jagger was completely still as he stared at what looked liked some folded up papers on the table.

“Jagger?” Ren said as he reached his side.

His voice seemed to snap Jagger out of his reverie and he looked up at Ren and smiled. “Hey, how did it go?”

“Good,” Ren said absently. “Are you okay?” He wasn’t surprised when Jagger pulled him down to sit astride him and kissed him.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” Ren said as he ended the kiss. He tensed when he felt Jagger’s arms go around him and he dropped his head to Ren’s chest but didn’t speak. Ren held him there for a moment as he stroked his hand over Jagger’s head.

“I love you,” he heard Jagger whisper. “More than I ever thought possible.”

Ren sucked in a breath at the words. In his gut he’d known that Jagger loved him but to finally hear the words…

“I love you too,” Ren said as he lifted Jagger’s head and kissed him. But something was still off with Jagger and it was scaring the hell out of him. “Did something happen?”

Jagger reached past him for the papers on the table and then handed them to him. “What is it?” Ren asked.

“I don’t know. I can’t read it.” The shame in Jagger’s voice was crushing. “A guy delivered it an hour ago.”

“Do you want me to see what it is?” Ren asked carefully. Jagger’s dyslexia wasn’t something they’d ever talked about but he knew it had to be a painful topic for Jagger.

Jagger nodded.

Ren opened the document and scanned it and then felt his heart sink. “You’re being sued,” he said. “Some guy named Jason Sutter is suing you for battery. Jesus, he wants four million dollars in damages.”

Jagger took the document from him and tossed it back on the table. He seemed unconcerned by the news.

“Who is he?” Ren asked.

“Connor’s ex. He went after Connor a few months ago outside my place. I stopped it. Fucker’s got no case. The cops took pictures of Connor’s injuries and there were witnesses that saw Sutter assault Connor.”