Saving Georgia (12 page)

“Shane, honey, I know… and I love you. I love you so freakin’ much that I can’t stand it. And the very notion of you leaving me makes me sick to my stomach. I need you, I want you… I can’t afford to lose you, Shane. Don’t you get it?”

“Georgia that would never happen,” Shane argues, trying to reassure me for the millionth time.

“You can’t know that for sure!” I gush, wanting him to understand that. “I’d be dead now if it wasn’t for you. Think what could happen if you broke my heart.” I plead with him.

“I get it. But Georgia, think about what you’re doing to mine.” Shane says, kneeling down so he can look into my eyes. “I need you just as much as you need me.”

“Shane I seriously doubt it.” I scoff at him. He has no idea how valuable he is to me.

“Alright, you don’t believe me, but it doesn’t make it any less true.” Shane tells me, looking like he’s been defeated.

Suddenly there are headlights pulling up the drive, and my cell is going off yet again.

“Who is that?” Shane asks me.

“I haven’t a clue.” I said, blocking my eyes from the headlights, trying to see who it is. Suddenly the truck came to a screeching halt.

“Georgia! Thank God you’re OK!” I hear Jason yell. My whole mind goes blank. Everything seems to stand still.
This cannot be happening.
Suddenly I am lifted up in Jason’s big, broad arms and I feel like a rag doll being tossed into the wind.

“Georgia, baby, speak to me. Did Shane hurt you?” Jason asks me.

Shane hurt me? No. Never.

“No, I’d never hurt her!” Shane yells at Jason.

Shane stop yelling.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Jason asks me again, pleading with me with all of his might. “Georgia, please I’ve been so worried about you, talk to me please!” Jason is growing desperate and breaths heavy into my hair.

“She was talking and everything just fine until you showed up, partner.” Shane says.

“I’d never hurt her! What are you insinuating?” Jason yells, and I can feel his arms tensing up.
No Jason, don’t be angry. Shane, he’s a nice guy, can’t you see that?

Why are they arguing? There’s no reason to argue. I’m just in shock that’s all. I feel like I just want to hide and die of embarrassment.

“Sweetheart, are you OK?” Shane caresses me. I nod in response. I’m alright, overall. “Do you want me to stay?” He asks.

I had to think about it, and I don’t want them both here but I have to be fair to Jason too. Begrudgingly I shook my head no. I got a little sad since I can no longer hear the cicadas singing.

“OK, sugar. Call me in the morning if you need a ride.” Shane bows his head and getting in his truck.

“Need a ride? Where is your car?” Jason presses me, looking me dead in the eye.

“She’ll tell you. Or maybe she won’t… from the looks of it. Don’t worry about it buddy, I’ve got this under control.” Shane chides out the window of his truck.

Jason is angry. Jason is very, very angry.
We saw Shane speed off in his truck, and Jason took me to the swing on the porch.

“He’s gone now. Mind telling me what happened?” Jason asks, concerned.

I nodded, and sighed, “my alternator belt broke. I was stuck and I know that Shane’s dad has a shop out back of their house. Shane’s always been my go-to guy for my car. He’s been working on it since I got it.” I explain.

“I understand that, but why didn’t you answer your phone?” He presses.

“I don’t know. I was going to call you back when I was alone.” I say, which is partially true.

“I’m going to get you a car that is safer.” Jason says, angrily. Balling his hands into fists.

“I love my car. It’s just an alternator belt, those go in all cars.” I argue back. I don’t need his charity.

“OK. I understand. Look I’m not mad at you. Well, maybe a little mad. But, I’m just concerned, and I was worried. We were supposed to hang out and when you didn’t call I freaked.” Jason says, running his hands through his tousled hair.

I now understand the gravity of my actions. My heart is all but literally ripped in two, for these two men in my life. Every time I think I figure out who would make me happy, seeing the pain on the other makes me question my judgment.

“Come here you beautiful girl. Baby, please don’t scare me like that anymore.” He scooping me up in his lap.

“I’m so sorry.” I say, and I feel like I could cry. Slowly the memory of the beautiful lights with Shane is fading, the cicada’s song is long out of reach for my ears and the bullfrogs are silent. Now I am here with this beautiful man who looks like he could cry, and it’s this moment that I see for myself that Jason Grimes fell in love with me.

“Jason, please don’t cry.” I beg him.

“I’m not…” He says in a soft voice. “I could, but I’m not.”

“Don’t worry Jason… I love you too.”

Ever since I could remember, I’ve always enjoyed the stillness of early morning. I’m sitting on the front porch with a cup of tea, looking out into the landscape before me. Dew is glistening off the fresh cut blades of grass. I hear Mr. Hyde off in the shed, and aside from his tinkering, it’s a silent morning. The gilded sun is slowly rising, like it’s stirring from just waking up. The cardinals are swooping and diving, playing as they haven’t a care in the world; and here I am crying in my tea (figuratively speaking).

I have two boys who somehow love me, and instead of feeling blessed, happy, or over joyed and taking advantage of this situation like any normal girl would; I feel like what is set before me is a decision on which heart to break. And no matter which one ends up broken, a piece of mine will be shattered with it.

I made my way inside and found Mama Hyde in the kitchen.

“Breakfast, sweetie?”,Mrs. Hyde asks.

“Toast please.” I say, sitting down on a barstool at the kitchen island.

“Why you look so glum, Georgia?” She asks.

“Social predicament. Two boys, one Georgia.” I offer as an answer.

“Mmm hmm. I see.” Mrs. Hyde replies, while poking around for a butter knife. “You know, sometimes we can’t change things. People will always get hurt in life sugar, but the things we can’t change sometimes change us.”

I sat and thought about this. Mrs. Hyde put my toast in front of me and I poked around it for a bit. “Shane has my car; I won’t be home until probably late. And can we go Prom shopping this week?” I ask.

“Of course sweetie,” Mrs. Hyde says, smiling like she just done won the lotto.

“Thank you.” I said, taking the plate from Mrs. Hyde. I absolutely love this woman.

I finished breakfast and made my way upstairs to finish getting ready. I was looking for my phone to call Shane, but as I putting around I heard the familiar kick of gravel in the driveway. Jason is here.

I sprinted downstairs and ran right past Mrs. Hyde.

“Jason! What are you doing here?” I cry out, running right up to him.

“Shane gets you this afternoon, and Prom. I can have this morning.” He smiles, scooping me up in his arms.

I have this sudden growing ache for him that I know cannot be satisfied.

“Unless you object, my love,” Jason eyes me sideways, looking down at me.

“Not at all, It’s quite a lovely surprise.” I smile looking deep in him. Why is it that he doesn’t cross my mind as often as he used to, but when I am face to face with this man I get this primal, carnal yearning for him?

“Good.” He says, lowering me deliciously slowly to my feet.

“Hey, why are you in sweats?” I ask him, never seeing Jason is anything besides his football uniform or dressed in something from an American Eagle catalog.

“Dance practice, it keeps me limber for the field. And, it’s a hell of a lot of fun. I thought you chicks like it when a guy has moves.” Jason gives me that crush-worthy smiles of his, holding my hips and swaying us side to side with him brushed up against me. Holy hell that’s hot.

“I wasn’t sure before, but I think you can convince me.” I say, batting my lashes at him.

“I’ll show you at Prom. The boys and I have a little surprise.” Jason winks at me, with this devilish grin crossing his face. He looks like the Cheshire cat. He looks so sexy in his sweatpants, Echo Hoodie and wife beater on. He has his baseball cap backwards, and his whole outfit matches. Holy crow, my sexy, athletic bad boy, he will definitely get me thinking about him all day.

“A surprise?” I ask.

“Mmm hmm.” Jason says, giving me a boyish wink. “Now let’s get goin’.” He slaps my bottom, shooing me off to get my things.

I started heading to the house, when I heard “Georgia wait! Watch this!” Jason calls out to me, and I turn round and he does a backflip.

“Oh my gosh! Jason!” I laugh, smiling because it’s just a wonderful thing to see. He is so sexy, and there is no other way to describe it. And it is just amazing that this guy wants me. Today is starting off on a good note.

I ran in and grabbed my backpack and slipped on some lip gloss. I hope he likes strawberry. I snatched up my keys, thankfully, because Shane should have Elsie fixed today.

We took the ride into school slowly. The dew was still slick and there was a light fog in the air. The smell of fresh cut grass whirled into the truck, and I can feel the beads of condensation when I put my hand out the window. It was truly a perfect morning. Jason was looking so yummy and he was happy and smiling like crazy. I couldn’t help but start smiling like a fool myself; his grin was too infectious. He grabbed my hand and we listen to his music on the way into school.

“We’re going to be ridiculously early, Jason. I just realized how early it is.” I said.

“That’s the point, beautiful.” Jason counters, with a wink of his eye.

“OK, I’m curious. What is Jason Grimes’s grand scheme of things? What’s the plan Stan?”

“Ha ha” Jason laughs “You’ll see, pretty girl. You will see.”

We finally made it to campus in the early morning fog. Once we got out the truck, Jason took me by the hand and led me to the gymnasium. Once we got in, there were other guys in there, decked out in their sweats as well. I know I have seen them before, but their names have escaped me.

“’Bout damn time you got here bro!” One of the sweatpants boys hollered at Jason.

“Who’s the chick, Jase?” Another random boy asks.

“This is my girl, Georgia. Play nice, bro.” Jason warns. “Baby, go sit down on the bleachers okay, I want you to see a part of what we’re working on.” Jason smiles, kissing my hand and pointing to the sidelines.

Giddily I jumped up and down, and skipped over to the grandstand and took a seat like a dutiful girlfriend would. Do I consider myself that? I am not sure what I should label myself if anything, or if it is even necessary.

You can hear the squeak of their sneakers against the hard lacquered floor. There was a mini boom box off to the side and one of the sweat suit guys turned it on. Suddenly my ears were filled with the sounds of Genuwine “in those jeans” and those boys started doing some awesome southern rendition of a Chip & Dales routine. Pelvic thrusts and all other sorts of hot, masculine athletic moves made me have to put my libido in check.

“Whatcha think?” Jason asks me, walking up to me.

“I think it’s fabulous!” I squeal. Seriously, this guy has got some moves! I love the way he talks with his body, and it’s so carnal. I can tell my face is a dead giveaway, because I can feel the heat in my skin. Jason smiles at me and leans in and gave me a sweet, brisk kiss. Needless to say his ‘homeboys’ gave the stereotypical whoop, hoot and holler. He smelled like his musk, and sweat and it was so freaking hot.

“Come on baby, let’s get ready for class.” Jason laugh, grabbing my hand and pulling me up.

Swiftly I gathered my bearings and mustered my way through the gymnasium, arm in arm with Jason Grimes. I feel like a social stigma at the top of the high school hierarchy, and although it makes me happy, it rattles me to my very core. We were walking down the big, long hall that’s adorned with lockers, and paint as old as my parents would be. The smell of fresh cleaned floors and dusty, old text books is rather comforting. No one is here yet but us and the janitor. Some teachers have slowly started trickling into the building. The dawn is still upon us, and the dew is still light in the air; and noticing this I started to pull Jason to the back doors in the cafeteria to linger outside. It dawns on me that this is one of the last times I can enjoy this peace here at school and spend time with Jason a bit more publicly.

“Where are we going?” Jason asks, confused.

“To watch the rise of the sun,” I smile. I pull him into the courtyard and found a bench to sit on. I sat him down and laid myself down into his arms. I ruffled through my book bag and dug out my copy of “Brave New World” by Aldous Huxley that I have a report on due next week. An interesting read but frankly not my average cup of tea.

Jason sighed contently and wrapped his arms around me, moving strands of my hair behind my ear, and caressing my jawline ever so softly and slowly. This is so comfortable and sweet, that it will be etched into my fondest of memories, right up there with the stars with Shane. That night, was epic.

Jason started to hum lightly into my ear, and the only thing I can think of is it must be more Will Dailey. I don’t know if the poor boy knows anything aside from him, but he does make a point that the guy can sing. The dew on the grass started to glow like little amber orbs, and the slickness is almost audible. Slowly the ember hues grow and climb the walls around us, enveloping the campus as a whole. Kids start to trickle in one by one, or by small groups. Laugher is around us, but it seems like we are in our own little world just Jason and I.

“There you are Georgy.” I hear from behind me.

“Jenn?” I look up, turning my head just enough to look around but not leave Jason’s chest.

“I was wondering where you went to.” She says, walking over to us.

“I stole her this morning. Sorry about that.” Jason sighs, not taking his hands out of my hair. It’s so relaxing I could fall back to sleep so easily.

“Yeah, that’s fine I guess.” Jenn arches an eyebrow, shuffling her feet on the ground. “Have you heard from Shane yet?” She asks me, poking me with her foot.

“Not yet. He’s supposed to be taking me back today; he’s going to work on Elsie.” I answer, not taking my eyes out this book, and frankly I am thoroughly enjoying some scalp love.

“OK, just wondering. We’re going Prom shopping still right? This week?” Jenn asks me, dipping her head low so I would look at her.

“Yes ma’am.” I look up at her and smiling. Jenn looks down at me with a big, Cheshire grin and gives me a soft giggle.

“Who are you going with, by the way?” I ask her. She never mentioned that she had a date. Come to think of it, she hasn’t mentioned anything about Prom!

“Well, I was going to go stag, or drag you with me. But since you’ve got a date now , I’m going with Nick Seagars.”

“Nick Seagars huh! You vixen you!” I gush at her. She’s being quite the little hussy not telling me the dish in her life.

“Yes, I’ve bewitched him. He’s pretty dreamy and a great guy. I’m one lucky lady.” She gushes.

“Things getting serious Jenn-Jenn?” I pry her.

“Mmmhmm. Or I think so anyway.” She’s glaring down at me between those stately eyelashes of hers. I’m so jealous that she has such gorgeous features, that it just only enhances my insecurities.

“I am so happy for you!” I sit up and put down my book, to grab my best friend in a great big bear hug.

“Thank you! I can’t wait to go dress shopping and dolling you up again. That’s my favorite part! And this time, no Harper Kelly!” Jenn giggles, spinning me around at arm’s length.

I laughed so hard, my side’s aches. I hear Jason Grimes chuckle lightly under his breath.

“It’s time for class, my love. Let’s get to it.” Jenn sighs contently, picking up my bag and handing it to me.

“OK. Yeah I should go. I have a few more pages to read in this chapter, and I have a report on this book I need to start.” I say, taking my bag from her. “I’ll see you later right?” I ask turning to Jason.

“Yeah babe, I’ll catch you on the flip side.” He stands and walks across the courtyard, giving me a casual wink that made me almost fall to my knees. Gosh he is so darn beautiful.

Jenn and I walked into the main hallway and I saw Shane putting some stuff in his locker. I ran up behind him and jumped up against him, wrapping my hands around his eyes.

“Good Morning sweetheart.” Shane says, smiling and clasping his hands on top of mine.

“Morning Shane!”, I squeal. “Having a good day so far?”

“Getting better by the minute; I tinkered with your car a bit this morning. My dad is getting the parts I need today so when we’re done with school, it’ll be all there and I can jump right into it.” He says smiling, wiggling his brows up and down.

“Awesome! What would I do without you?” I say, wrapping my arms around him. “You’re just too good to me.” I say, burying my head in his chest. Gosh he smells so good.

“I’m not sure, you’d have to tell me.” Shane laughs, stroking my head.

“I couldn’t and I don’t want to.” I offer up a smile, looking at his face. I adore this boy. “I have to get to lit class. Want to walk me?” I ask, noticing that Jenn disappeared down the hall with Nick Seagars, like a bouncing bundle of joy.

Shane and I walked arm in arm down the long corridor littered with our peers and lockers. Classrooms adorned both sides of the hallways with wooden doors and plate glass windows. This was about as normal and comfortable as it can get. I know that Shane is my natural path, but I also know that is it a level of self-destruction that I could not bear. I know that it would implode and my life without him would be miserable. It would be like trying to breathe underwater; useless and painful, and it will eventually will kill me. I cannot accept that as my fate, and I cannot see any other outcome for us. However, could I even see a positive end result with Jason? I can’t see myself with him in the end, but I can’t see my life being complete without him either, because he causes this reaction to my body that is only starting to become warm, familiar and leaving me internally wanton.