Authors: Lorhainne Eckhart
Eric paced the width of the bridge, clasping his hands behind his back, studying the open sea but not seeing one thing. Even with the radio static, the voices of the crew, the buzz and hum of activity, everything reminded him of Abby.
“Captain, did you hear me?” Deputy Intelligence Chief Monroe called out from the other side of the bridge.
When Eric glanced over, he didn’t miss the way the crew were watching him, and there was that odd look, or frown, or worried expression, as if each wondered if maybe he was a ticking time bomb who’d snap on any one of them.
“Sorry, Chief, can you repeat that?”
“Sir, a British destroyer was spotted miles offshore, navigating toward a naval gunfire support position.”
“Did you notify the Vincent?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Okay, notify me when you find out what they’re doing there.” Eric didn’t wait around. He was starting to feel damn awkward on his ship, a ship that was the only home he had ever known, and he didn’t like that feeling at all. He didn’t have a clue where he was going, which was unlike him, but he walked and kept going, crewmembers jumping off to the side in the passageway as he hurried past.
He went the one place where his heart ached a little less, to see Abby. When he popped open the door, she was leaning against a mound of pillows on her bed, reading a book. Her eyes immediately darted to him, and she dropped the book to her lap. His heart zinged right to her, and he didn’t know how he made his feet move, because just standing there watching her had turned his feet to lead. Then he was
beside her, looking down on her and the bruises on her face that were beginning to fade.
“How are you feeling?”
A slight blush colored her rounded cheeks as she looked up and put a protective hand over her swollen belly. “We’re fine.” Then she licked her lips as if gathering courage to say something, and his heart flipped again. “I asked the doctor if I could get up and told him you’d show me around the ship. He said I could as long as I take it easy, but that’s if you’re still able to show me around?”
Eric crossed his arms, and her eyes immediately skimmed over the eagle tattoo on his tight bicep. Many women had said he had the arms and abs of a fighter, and he was proud of the shape he was
in. The eagle was his symbol, one he’d never commented on, but the tattoo had been the first thing he did for himself after he enlisted.
“That is beautiful.” She gestured to it. “I’ve always loved eagles, loved their call. Do you know when they choose a mate, it’s for life?” She said it and then lowered her gaze as if worried she was saying too much.
Eric sat on the bed, the springs squeaking. He pushed up his sleeve. Abby didn’t move away, but she did tuck her hair nervously behind her ears.
“I had this done in Thailand, my first deployment when I was still a kid. This eagle feels so much like my totem.”
Her eyes flew up to his, and she smiled and nodded. “I knew that when I saw it. It suits you.”
Eric didn’t know how he could keep his hand from her, from touching her, because all he wanted to do was run his hands through her thick blond hair, to run his fingers over her jawline. What he did instead was move away and try to kick start his brain before he went any further down this road, because everything right now made it impossible.
“Let me call the doc and find out if he really said it would be okay to take you,” Eric said.
She flung her feet over the edge and winced when her bare feet hit the cool floor. Eric grabbed the phone and called admin, because he knew this was when Larry would be filing all his reports.
“Larry, it’s the captain.”
“Yes, Captain?”
“I’m with Abby in sickbay. She says you’ve given the okay for me to take her around the ship. I want to make sure we’re not getting our wires crossed.”
He watched her from the corner of his eye. A light pink tinged her cheeks as she smoothed her hand over the borrowed blue shirt and pants. She was a vision of loveliness, with the sleeves of the large shirt rolled up, and the shirttails bunched about her on the mattress when she sat back down. He stifled a grin as she bent her leg up around her tummy to put on the borrowed sneakers that sat on the bed beside her. He didn’t know where she’d gotten them, but they were better for walking than the thongs she’d worn the other day.
“As long as she doesn’t try to run a marathon, she’s good. Just a nice, comfortable walk. Don’t do lots of standing around, though,” Larry said.
“Thanks, Doc,” Eric said before hanging up. “Well, good news and bad, Abby. Doc said an easy walk without lots of standing, so I won’t show you the whole ship.”
“It’ll be nice to just get past these four walls. I miss the fresh air. Could we go outside? I’d really like that.”
How could he deny her that? Eric himself loved this life for the openness of the sea, and whenever he was able, he found his way on deck. “Okay, let’s go,” he said. With a secure hold on the back of her elbow, he helped her stand and escorted her to the door, holding it open and then guiding her out.
“Thank you” was all she said as she gazed up at him with a joyful look that lit up her entire face.
Eric was in charge, and he led her down the passageway and then through the hatch that opened out onto the deck. “Watch your step. Hang on to me.”
The first few steps on deck, he felt her hesitation as they stopped. It was through her eyes that he remembered his first time on deck: the powerful sense of awe that had pumped through his blood and left him lightheaded, feeling the power beneath his feet, the steel of the ship that was larger than anything he’d ever expected, with miles and miles of bright blue ocean in the backdrop. He still got chills, and he realized, watching her watching all of this with her mouth gaping in awe, that he’d forgotten to say thank you.
It wasn’t until he noticed movement beside him that he realized there were others on deck. Sailors jumped to attention, and one of them seemed to stumble over
his own feet over Abby. Of course, just the sight of her had many of them sprouting peacock feathers, eager to get her attention. What Eric did though was shoot them a warning glare, each of them, except Jamieson, who seemed to be ignoring him.
“Good to see you again, ma’am.…” Jamieson said.
“You got nothing to do, Jamieson? Find the XO and get him to assign you some work,” Eric said, cutting the young crewman off before he could prattle on.
“Yes, sir,” he said and hurried off through the hatch.
“Watch your feet, and don’t trip.”
Abby’s foot caught on the armor plate around the hatch. It happened so fast that one minute, she was stumbling, and the next, he was lifting her in his arms. Her own arms flew up and wrapped around his neck. My God, having her arms so intimately around him, holding on, had his heart thumping. His thin rein was about ready to snap, and he wanted to start stamping his mark like a
caveman, proclaiming ‘This is my woman’ to everyone, including Abby. She was really testing him. What he really wanted to do was tuck her in bed with him, lock the door, and not let anyone in. But he couldn’t, and as much as he hated doing it, he set her down. His body mourned the loss of all her curves against him. Reluctantly, he dropped his arms from around her and pumped his hands, which now felt so empty.
“You need to be more careful and watch where you step,” he snapped.
“I’m sorry, I just have a hard time seeing over the baby. I haven’t been able to see my feet for a while.” The wind was whipping her hair in her face, and she looked up at him. “Please don’t be angry with me.”
Angry, she thought he was angry.
If she only knew. “Abby, I’m not mad at you. I just want you to be safe.”
She looked so serious, and he was stunned when her finger reached up and touched just below his eye. “You have a scar there. What happened?”
He didn’t want her to take her hand away. He wanted her to put her hands everywhere, all over him. “Fighting a drunk.”
She ran her finger over the scar. “I feel so safe with you. How do you do that?”
“I want you to feel safe. That’s why I brought you out here. As long as you’re here, with me, you’re safe.”
“But at some point I have to leave.
Then what?” She blinked hard, and he could tell she was fighting back tears and worry. It was the same feeling he had, the hounds nipping at the gates. It would be time soon, and she’d have to leave. He had to start making plans for her.
“Abby, you’re right. Soon you will have to leave, but I plan on keeping you here until I know you’ll be safe.” He placed both his hands on her shoulders and studied her face, every inch of it, as if burning the memory of her into his mind so he’d never forget this moment. “Do you trust me?”
She inclined her head, and her expression turned serious. “Yes.”
Time seemed infinite in that moment, as if there were no here and now. It was just them.
“Let me take care of seeing to it that you’re safe, because I will. I don’t know where or how, but I’ll figure it out.”
She nodded and then gazed out at the sea. She took a deep breath that he felt pulling from his own lungs. He knew what being out at sea did for him— her power filled every part of him, as if he could overcome anything and nothing could touch him.
Until he stepped inside.
She smiled up at him, and he slid his arm around her shoulder. She leaned into him automatically, as if she were his. He wanted so much just to enjoy being with her and this moment, but at a flicker of movement off to his right—a female
crewman saw him, started, and hurried the other way—everything came crashing in. He remembered Gail and her ugly charge that would rip his entire life apart, taking his hope for a chance for something good and loving.
He looked down on Abby with deep longing, because he wondered what would happen to her if he
was convicted. Where would she go back in the US? Would she meet a young man who could make her happy, who would love her and her baby, who would touch her at night while they lay side by side, whispering their dreams to each other long into the night? His eyes burned, and for a moment he wanted to hit something as he struggled not to lose it. The thought of another man touching her hurt so much that he thought it would be kinder to feed his heart through a meat grinder.
“Are you all right?” She reached up and placed her slender hand flat on his chest. She was watching him with such concern that he knew he needed to pull it together or she’d be poking
around, asking and questioning until someone finally broke down and told her the ugly truth of what Eric was facing. The idea shamed him even though he hadn’t done it.
She shivered and leaned in closer.
“You’re cold.” He rubbed her trembling shoulder, down her arm. “It’s time to go back. I promised the doc I wouldn’t keep you out here long. You need to go back in and rest before dinner.” He surprised himself by what came out next. “Would you like to join me for dinner tonight? We’ll eat with the officers in the wardroom.” He blurted it out because he didn’t want his time with her to end.
“Yes, I would love to have dinner with you tonight.”
As he guided her back toward the hatch, he stopped as they faced aft and gestured with his hand. “I know I didn’t give you the promised tour, but just being on deck, feeling her power, really tells you a lot about a ship. She’s a powerful warship, able to hit targets deep inland if needed, with pinpoint accuracy, at any time, anywhere, under any conditions.” His voice softened.
“She is you,” Abby said, and when he looked at her expression, he knew she meant it. The words
were spoken with so much respect and pride that his heart expanded with more love than he thought was ever possible.
Eric had neglected so many of his duties that he was amazed the ship hadn’t fallen apart. “God, get it together, man,” he barked at himself as he did up his last shirt button on a clean uniform shirt while dressing for dinner. He checked his image in the mirror: He had a tanned complexion, eyes the color of golden whiskey, but he couldn’t hide the sadness lurking in him like shadows. It made his eyes duller, his face harder, but there was nothing he could do about it. He’d love to give himself a hard kick in the ass to make himself focus, get on with things.
He yanked open his door and realized his hands were damp. He wanted to laugh at how pathetic he was. When was the last time he’d been this nervous over a woman? He slammed the door behind him, and one of the
crewmen coming his way paled and moved aside.
“Captain,” he said.
Eric kept walking, looking away, his eyes forward, nodding at the passing crewmen. The guard at sickbay opened the door for him, and there she was, looking so fresh and pretty, sitting there waiting. Her whole face lit up when he stepped in.
“Are you ready for dinner?” he asked.
“Yes,” she said eagerly while easing herself off the bed. “I think all that fresh air earlier made me really hungry.”
He was
absolutely powerless at the sight before him. All swollen with child, she was lovely, even in the sailor’s castoffs. He was sure in that moment that she would make a grain sack look good. It was instinct for Eric to take her arm and guide her out the door, up to the wardroom where all the officers gathered for dinner. When he stepped into the lush, dark wood room, with Abby’s fingers digging into his arm, a hush fell as all eyes turned and looked at Abby. Eric sensed her tensing up as her grip tightened on his arm. She must have felt as though she was on display, because she stepped closer and darted a worried glance at him.