Read Saturday Night Special Online
Authors: Mari Carr
Riley looked at Aaron and gave him a crooked grin as Jo walked away. “Jesus. All we need is for Johnny to walk in and we’ll have a trifecta.”
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Aaron didn’t laugh at her joke. Instead, he pointed toward the front door of the restaurant. Sure enough, Johnny was walking their way.
“Can’t find your friend. He’s a slippery fucker,” he said, rubbing his temple.
“Feeling a little sick. Must be the heat.”
“Or the booze,” Aaron muttered.
“Yeah, well. I think food will help. Still your treat, right?”
Johnny headed to the food bar without waiting for their answer.
Riley watched the three unsuspecting people jostling for food position at the bar and then glanced back at Bella and Trevor, so wrapped up in their argument they didn’t see World War III descending on them.
She giggled. She couldn’t help it. “Wow. This is gonna be so funny.”
“Dammit, Riley. Do
not
start laughing. We’ve got five mentally unstable people here.”
“Think we should evacuate the building?” She laughed harder at her joke, but Aaron continued to scowl.
“You distract them while I go over and tell Trev and Bella to get the hell out of here.”
Riley nodded her agreement, unable to speak as her laughter bubbled over to the boiling point. Jesus. She really couldn’t stop laughing and tears began to stream over her cheeks. Whether it was exhaustion, frustration or the fact that her entire being had been on overload since her drunken elopement to Aaron, she felt all the stress and craziness of the past two days escaping in uncontrollable laughter.
“What’s so funny?” Bubbles asked.
Riley couldn’t speak to answer. Instead she snorted and laughed harder. Putting up one finger, she fought hard to catch her breath. Aaron was shaking his head, but she could see he was fighting back his own laughter. They were screwed. They both knew it.
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“S-s-sorry,” she gasped, taking a deep breath. “Got the giggles there.”
Aaron nodded, his face breaking into a wide grin. “I can see that. Let the cards fall where they may?”
Riley shrugged and agreed. “Our offensive line sucks. Time to switch to defensive maneuvers.”
Bubbles was staring at them oddly. “What?”
“Nothing,” Aaron said as the occasional odd giggle continued to escape Riley’s lips.
“Let’s just eat.”
“What the fuck is
she
doing here?” Bubbles’ tone and angry question alerted Riley that she’d finally spotted her nemesis.
“That didn’t take long,” Riley muttered. The fury in her new friend’s eyes quickly dispelled the humor she’d been feeling. Shit. She wasn’t sure their defense was going to be strong enough.
“Bubbles,” Riley said, standing up and stepping in front of the woman when she started toward Bella’s table. “Listen. I need you to sit and calm down. Going over there right now isn’t going to solve anything.”
“Of course it will,” Bubbles screeched. “Me rearranging that cunt’s face will solve everything.”
Bubbles sidestepped Riley and stalked across the room.
“Uh-oh.” Aaron was looking at the food bar. Johanna and Johnny had also caught sight of their prey and were crossing the room, food trays in hand, to confront them.
Riley threw up her hands. “Let’s go.”
She and Aaron rushed over to Bella and Trev’s table. The couple was no longer arguing and instead looked shell-shocked as they were surrounded by the enemy on three sides.
“Jo?” Trev asked stupidly.
Bella burst into tears when she saw her ex. “Johnny!”
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For a brief moment, Riley foolishly thought they may be all right. They’d all sit down like rational, civilized people and things would work out. Bubbles dashed that hope with one swing of her tray. She dumped all her food onto an unsuspecting Bella’s lap. Bella hissed like a wet cat, picking up her glass of iced tea and tossing the liquid in Bubbles’ face.
Unfortunately, Riley had chosen to stand a little too closely to Bubbles and half the liquid covered her as well.
“Dammit, Bella,” Riley said. “I was supposed to be in Vegas for two days. I didn’t pack enough clothes for you to start tossing shit on—”
Her words died when a snowball of mashed potatoes struck her mid-chest.
“Oops,” Trev said. “I was aiming for that crazy woman.” He pointed at Bubbles, who was now chucking rolls and food from their table and surrounding ones like a soldier lobs grenades. Trev raised his hand in an attempt to dodge the bread and French fries raining down on him. “Make her stop throwing shit, Riley!”
Riley turned to block Bubbles’ view of the table, reaching to grab the woman’s hands. “Bubbles, stop it! The manager is gonna call the cops. Do you want to go to jail?”
“I want that bitch to stand up and fight me, fair and square.”
“Who you callin’ a bitch?” Bella shouted from the table. Before Riley could turn, she felt something very cold and slimy hit her back and begin sliding down her T-shirt.
“What the hell?” She turned around to find Bella dipping her spoon into a bowl of ice cream, preparing to launch more of her hot fudge sundae.
“Put it down,” Riley said. Bella paused for a moment. “Put. It.
Down
.”
Riley started to yell at Aaron for not stepping in to help her but one glance to her left proved he was fighting his own losing battle. He had his arms wrapped around Johanna from behind as the woman flailed about, attempting to batter Trev with her purse, her fists, her feet. Trev was pleading with her to calm down, his hands constantly 121
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moving, alternating between covering his face and his privates. She was putting up one helluva fight.
The sound of sirens outside had the effect of someone dousing them with a hose, and the fight went out of them. Jo hung limply in Aaron’s arms. Bella put her hands in her lap and Bubbles sank into a chair at another table.
Two policemen came in and the manager pointed at them.
“Great,” Riley heard one of the cops mutter as they walked up. “Bubbles and Bella.
Again. What did we do to deserve this?”
* * * * *
An hour later, the seven of them found themselves back on the street—sticky, hot and three hundred and thirty-seven dollars and fifty-four cents poorer. Somehow that was the price tag the manager put on the destruction they’d wrought in the restaurant.
Luckily, Aaron had managed to talk the Vegas cops out of citing them all for disorderly conduct.
“What now?” Riley asked. She wanted to go back to the hotel and clean up.
Unfortunately she was surrounded by too many crazy people looking to her for answers. There was no way she was going to risk taking them someplace where they could destroy anything else. She was officially broke.
Aaron pointed to a small café that had outdoor seating. “Do you all think you could sit at that café without throwing fists, food or drinks at each other?”
They all nodded wearily and proceeded down the street in a pack. Riley ignored the looks of passersby. She knew they all probably looked as if they’d escaped from some asylum. They were covered in food. Riley’s hair was stuck together in three places with dried mashed potatoes. Bella’s long blonde hair was coated with tomato sauce and Bubbles’ hot pink ’do was flatter than Riley’d ever seen it, weighted down by ice cream and hot fudge.
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The guys had actually fared worse. In addition to the food stains, Trev had a fat lip.
Aaron was going to have a black eye by morning, thanks to an accidental headbutt from Jo, who looked like a reject in a white T-shirt contest from the pitcher of soda Trev had lobbed at her in an attempt to calm her down.
Surprisingly the hostess at the café agreed to seat them. She gave them one of the patio tables and brought them all glasses of water.
“Okay,” Aaron said, when they were all seated at last. “Here’s what happens now.
Trev, you and Bella are gonna tell us where you were for the last two days. The rest of us,” he gave an especially stern look at Jo, who looked contrite, “will listen. We’re not speaking until their story is finished. Then we’ll all calmly say our piece and go our separate ways. Got it?” Everyone nodded and Riley grinned.
For a moment she saw her future, saw Aaron solving fights between their children this way.
Children. She’d never considered having kids, but watching Aaron handle five unruly adults drove home to her how much she
did
want them. Lots of them. Maybe she’d try to break her parents’ record and go for eight. The thought made her smile and she saw Aaron give her a quizzical, confused look.
“I’ll tell you later,” she mouthed.
“So,” Aaron prompted, and Trev began his tale of woe while the rest of them listened in dumbfounded silence.
After leaving Riley and Aaron at the blackjack table, they’d gone up to his hotel room. Unfortunately, guilt over cheating on his wife had left Trev unable to perform, so they’d decided to hit the gambling tables again instead. Bella had been blowing off steam, angry with Johnny for trying to pressure her into marriage.
Riley figured Bella and Trev had found a sympathetic ear in each other. They’d only been at the slot machines for a few minutes when Trev hit the jackpot, winning a hundred grand.
“To celebrate, I took Bella out and bought her a fur coat.”
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Jo narrowed her eyes but Trev raised his hand quickly. “I was gonna get you one too, honey, but since I didn’t want to carry it around with me all night, I was gonna go back later.”
His answer seemed to appease his wife, but Riley knew better. In addition to the fur coat, he and Bella had stopped by Sal’s Sex Shop and, if the note he’d left her at the front desk was to be believed, he’d intended to marry Bella. Obviously, too much time spent in each other’s presence had proven them incompatible and Trev had had a change of heart. He was putting out some serious ass-kissing vibes and Riley tried not to be disgusted by the fact Jo was falling for it. Sheesh. Stupid woman.
“Anyway, Bella knew of some guys who hosted a nightly poker game with a big pot, one where you needed five thousand bucks just to enter. She said we should go, make a fortune so we could quit working and live the rest of our lives like fat cats.”
“You took him to Vinnie’s place?” Johnny asked.
Bella nodded guiltily.
“Vinnie the Snake?” Bubbles added, her eyes wide as she crossed herself reverently.
“Jesus,
chica
.”
Riley looked at Bella. “So let me get this straight. You called and quit your job
before
this Vinnie the Snake’s poker game? Didn’t that seem a bit premature to you?”
Bella shrugged. “I thought we were on a roll. We were feeling real lucky.”
“You lost all the money the very first night, didn’t you?” Aaron asked.
Trev nodded. “In less than two hours, I was twelve thousand in the hole.
Apparently those guys didn’t believe in IOUs and I didn’t have that kind of cash on me.
I told them I was good for it, but they got sort of pissed.”
Johnny shook his head. “Vinnie the Snake don’t get pissed. He gets even.”
Bella took up the tale at this point. “They took my fur coat and then they threw us in the back of this black sedan and drove us out of town. I thought they were going to 124
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kill us.” She looked at Johnny, tears streaming down her face. “I thought I’d never see you again.”
Johnny reached over and took her hand. “It’s okay, muffin. You’re here. Johnny will take care of everything.”
Riley rolled her eyes. She hated when people referred to themselves in third person.
Aaron winked at her. He knew all about that particular pet peeve of hers. He leaned forward and whispered in her ear, “Aaron thinks you look hot with mashed potatoes in your hair.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Riley’s gonna kick you in the balls if you don’t behave yourself.”
He chuckled.
“So what happened next?” Bubbles asked. Riley could see her new friend was enthralled with their adventure and hanging on the edge of her seat. “Did they beat you with rubber hoses? Bury you alive in shallow graves? Strip you naked and cover your bodies in fire ants?”
Riley gestured to them. “Jesus, Bubbles. You need to stop watching mafia movies.
Look at them. Do they look like they’ve been stripped and beaten?”
Trev shook his head. “No. They didn’t do any of that. They dumped us off in the middle of the damn desert. Left us there. We spent most of yesterday walking back.
Had to sleep outside last night. Kept feeling like shit was crawling on me and I’m chafed on account of there’s so much sand in my ass. First thing this morning we caught a break. A guy in a pickup truck stopped and let us ride in his truck bed. He brought us the rest of the way into the city.”
“He was taking garbage to the dump,” Bella said distastefully and Trev sighed angrily.
“It was a
ride
, Bella. Maybe you’d rather still be walking?”
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“All I’m saying is, I’m a lady. He could have offered me a seat inside the cab and moved that stupid big dog of his to the back with you.”
“You’re lucky he even stopped, you silly—”
Aaron whistled. “Story finished?”
They nodded.
Riley suddenly thought of something. “Hey, how the hell did you plan to pay for that all-you-can-eat lunch if Vinnie and his thugs took all your money?”
“They didn’t take it all,” Bella said, reaching down her top. “I always keep an emergency fifty tucked in my bra.”
Aaron narrowed his eyes and took the damp bill out of her hand.
“Hey!” she protested.
“That still doesn’t cover your share of the destruction back at the restaurant.” Riley figured that was as much of the money they’d ever get back. The rest was riding on Aaron’s credit card until the end of the month.
Bella looked at Bubbles. “I called Louis as soon as we hit town and asked for my job back. He said you filled in for me. Thanks.”