Sarah's Secret (11 page)

‘I don’t have any, Mr Hogan—yet,’ she said provocatively.

‘Something I’d better put right, then. Another first,’ he added with blatantly male satisfaction, and began to pay slow, subtle attention to every inch of her until Sarah
made it passionately clear she could endure the delicious agony no longer, and Jake surged inside her to take her on a fiery, gasping quest for the rapture they achieved almost in unison.

It was a long time before either of them spoke afterwards, but at last Jake raised his head. ‘Well?’ he demanded.

Sarah let out a deep, unsteady breath. ‘I now realise why the others were so keen on this.’

‘The others?’

‘The other students I knew. Those you’ve met, and a lot more besides. I was the only one who kept my bed strictly to myself.’

Jake propped himself up on an elbow to look down into her face. ‘You must have had a few problems with that?’

‘Quite a lot, at first. But eventually it was taken for granted that my experience with Davy was the problem.’ Sarah smiled up at him. ‘You’re the only one who knows the truth.’

Jake trailed a caressing finger down her cheek. ‘I still can’t believe I was your first lover. I thought I was dreaming when—’

‘When I ordered you to make love to me?’

‘Orders I was deliriously happy to obey!’ Jake kissed her at length, then rubbed his cheek against hers. ‘Tell me you love me.’

Her dark eyes narrowed ominously. ‘If I didn’t, Jake Hogan, none of this would have happened in the first place. Storm or no storm.’

‘Tell me just the same,’ he commanded.

To Sarah’s embarrassment shyness overtook her again. ‘I love you,’ she muttered, eyes falling.

‘Again.’

She stared up at him resentfully. ‘If you keep on making me say it I might change my mind.’

‘In which case,’ said Jake very softly, ‘I’d have to resort to measures to change it back.’

The mere thought of the measures he had in mind hurried Sarah’s breathing. Then her stomach gave a loud, embarrassing grumble, and he threw back his head and laughed.

‘You’re hungry!’ Jake bent his tousled head to kiss the place which protested. His lips lingered, moved downward, then stopped abruptly.

‘What’s the matter?’ she demanded.

He raised his head to give her a smile which made her toes curl. ‘Making love to you, Sarah Tracy, is addictive.’

Sarah flushed and looked away. ‘If you’ll hand me the dressing gown I’ll have a bath. What time’s breakfast?’

‘Eight o’clock, right here. I ordered it last night. Though we can eat downstairs if you prefer.’

‘I don’t. I’d much rather have it here, in private. But I hope you ordered a lot of food!’ She smiled at him as she scrambled into her robe. ‘Shan’t be long. I’m off to play with the dolphins.’

He sighed. ‘Alone, I suppose.’

‘If breakfast is arriving at eight,’ she retorted, ‘very definitely alone!’

After the emotional and physical demands of the night Sarah felt tired, but utterly happy as she shared breakfast with Jake.

‘I wasn’t sure what you’d like,’ he told her, ‘so I took a chance. Coffee, fresh fruit compote, scrambled eggs with grilled bacon, plus the usual toast and butter and so on.’

‘Perfect.’ Sarah tucked in with gusto. ‘I never eat much breakfast normally, but I’m hungry this morning.’

‘So am I.’ He leaned close to kiss her cheek. ‘Our recent activities tend to do that.’

‘Do they?’ Sarah gave him a sparkling, gold-flecked glance. ‘You’d know more about that than me.’

‘True.’ Jake was abruptly serious. ‘But this is a first for me, too, Sarah. I don’t deny that there have been women in my life before. Women whose company I enjoyed. But with you it’s different.’

‘Why?’

‘Because I’ve never loved anyone before,’ he said simply.

She gave him a luminous, rather shaky smile. ‘Thank you, darling.’

‘Say that again.’

‘Thank you?’

He leaned nearer. ‘No. The darling bit.’

She brandished her fork at him. ‘I want to get on with my breakfast, my darling Mr Hogan, so let’s leave the endearments until later.’

Later, packed and ready to join the others for coffee, Sarah sighed regretfully as she took a last look around the room.

‘Are you glad I persuaded them to let me have the bridal suite?’ said Jake.

Sarah nodded fervently. ‘Because we were the first to sleep here it seems like ours. I hate to leave it.’

‘We can come back any time you like.’ Jake looked down at her with the familiar straight look. ‘Which brings me to the next important subject. How soon can we get married?’

‘If it were just up to me I’d say as soon as possible,’
she assured him. ‘But there’s Davy to consider. I’d like to give her time to get used to the idea.’

‘Do
you
need time?’

She gave him a wicked little smile. ‘None at all. You’ve sold me on the idea already.’

When they went downstairs to the bar the others were waiting for them.

‘Good morning, you two,’ said Frances, smiling. ‘We thought of you last night, Sarah. I hope you cuddled her during the storm, Jake.’

He grinned. ‘I rather enjoyed the storm myself.’

‘I bet you did,’ said Ben with relish, as the others laughed.

‘We’re embarrassing Sarah,’ said Grania quickly.

‘Not in the least,’ said Sarah, and exchanged a long look with Jake. ‘In fact we’ve got something to tell you.’

Jake kissed her swiftly, then turned to the others with a triumphant smile. ‘Last night I asked Sarah to marry me. And she said yes.’

After their announcement, it was a long time before Sarah and Jake managed to make their farewells, and head for home.

‘It occurred to me, too late, that maybe you might not want our intentions made quite so public yet—if at all,’ said Sarah, when they were finally on their way.

‘Are you serious? I want the whole world to know—a.s.a.p. But Davy first, obviously. So how do we approach that?’

Sarah gave it some thought. ‘Perhaps you’d like to take us both to the Trout on Saturday evening, to eat in the garden there if it’s fine. Davy would love going out for a grown-up dinner.’

‘Done,’ he said promptly. ‘Will you tell her straight away?’

‘No. I’ll wait until Sunday morning, after she’s spent time with you.’ She smiled at him. ‘So you’d better put on the charm for Saturday night.’

To her surprise Jake was unamused.

‘I never deliberately set out to charm, Sarah,’ he said shortly. ‘And even if I did I would never try it with Davy.’

Sarah touched his hand in penitence. ‘I’m sorry. You obviously didn’t like that. But I witnessed your masterly performance with the receptionist, remember?’

He nodded, keeping his eyes on the road. ‘I admit that I pull out the stops when absolutely necessary. But never with you, Sarah. You get the plain, unvarnished Jake Hogan, always.’

‘Which is all I want, ever,’ she assured him.

They stopped for a snack after they left the motorway, then drove back in the afternoon to Campden Road.

‘Gosh, I’m tired,’ said Sarah, as they went inside the quiet house. She smiled at him. ‘You must be, too.’

‘We had very little sleep last night,’ he reminded her, taking her into his arms. ‘I suggest you go to bed for a while, darling. On your own, unfortunately. I’m just going to check on things at Pentiles, then I’ll take my gear on to the flat. What time shall I come back?’

‘Whenever you like. I’ll make supper.’

‘Perfect.’ He kissed her swiftly. ‘Then after that let’s have an early night. Together.’

‘Even more perfect,’ she assured him, and kissed him back at such length Jake lost all enthusiasm for anything to do with work.

‘Go,’ said Sarah, pushing him away. ‘I’ll be waiting when you come back. About eight?’

Jake shook his head as he went to the door. ‘Seven.’

Instead of taking a nap Sarah rang the school to report that she was back home in Campden Road. Then, feeling that the occasion called for something special by way of a meal, she got the car out to go shopping for food. She rushed home with her spoils afterwards, had a bath instead of a rest, then set to with a will in the kitchen. A few minutes short of seven she was dressed and ready in a sleeveless white T-shirt dress, her hair shining and her face alight with a glow which owed nothing to cosmetics. The courgette flowers she’d splurged on were stuffed with a savoury cheese mixture, ready to deep fry, a salad lacked only its dressing, and two steaks waited in a marinade, ready to grill. She’d laid the kitchen table with a yellow cloth, and as a finishing touch put out blue saucers to hold the fat yellow candles she’d bought.

When the phone rang Sarah went cold. Jake wasn’t coming! He’d had an accident. Then she flushed with guilt because she hadn’t thought of Davy first. And found it was neither Jake nor the school with bad news, but Margaret Parker making a brief duty call from Florence.

When Jake arrived, right on the stroke of seven, Sarah threw open the door with a smile of such passionate welcome he took her in his arms, careless of the bag of bottles he was carrying.

‘I just had a phone call,’ she said breathlessly, once he’d stopped kissing her.

‘Something wrong with Davy,’ said Jake sharply.

‘No. It was my grandmother, reporting in from Florence.’ Sarah smiled sheepishly as she went ahead of him to the kitchen. ‘But I was certain it was you, saying you couldn’t come.’

‘Why on earth should you think that?’ he said, mys
tified, and put the bottles on the table. ‘The champagne should be chilled, by the way.’

Sarah put it in the fridge, then turned to face him. ‘Because I felt so happy. I was sure something had happened to spoil it.’

Jake took her hands, his eyes spearing hers. ‘Sarah Tracy, I swear I will never consciously do anything to make you unhappy. Believe it.’

Sarah did believe it, and made it plain in a way Jake liked so much it was a long time before she came back to earth sufficiently to think of food. ‘This won’t do,’ she said severely. ‘Time I started dinner.’

Because Jake insisted on helping her the meal took rather longer to arrive at the table than Sarah had intended. But despite too many cooks everything turned out well. Jake was lavish with his praise, and the occasion was made even more festive by the champagne which Sarah enjoyed much more than the wine at the wedding.

‘Why is that, do you think?’ she said dreamily.

‘Simple, my darling. We’re drinking it to celebrate our engagement.’ Jake grinned. ‘In which case I could probably have got away with something a lot less pricey than this.’

‘Cheapskate!’ Sarah made a face at him. ‘Though you’re absolutely right.’

‘But for tonight I wanted only the best.’ Jake assured her.

‘I did, too.’ Sarah chuckled. ‘Surprising though it may be, Mr Hogan, courgette flowers and fillet steaks are not part of my normal diet.’

Later they made for the sofa in the sitting room and left the curtains open so they could watch the sun set
over the garden, Sarah curled up against Jake in utter contentment.

‘We must make the most of this, Jake,’ she said with a sigh.

He nodded. ‘Tomorrow night you want free for Davy, of course, but I’ll see you both on Saturday evening. How do I play that? Do I just drop you back here afterwards?’

‘If she’s happy you can come in for coffee.’

Jake snapped his fingers suddenly. ‘Don’t move. I’ll be back in a second.’ He went out into the hall for his jacket and came back with a square leather box. ‘Go on, open it,’ he said, handing it to Sarah.

She looked at him questioningly, then opened the box, her eyes like saucers when she found four rings inside.

‘I knew you wouldn’t want to make it official until Davy’s in on it, but I was determined to put a ring on your finger tonight, Sarah,’ said Jake. ‘My name is good with the jeweller in the Parade. He let me bring these to see which one you preferred. Don’t worry about the size. That can be adjusted.’

Sarah closed the box with a snap and climbed into his lap to kiss him. ‘I love you so much, Jake Hogan.’

He shook her slightly. ‘Hell, you scared me, Sarah. I thought you were going to throw the box back at me.’

For answer she kissed him with such fervour both of them forgot the rings and everything else for a while.

When Jake released her at last Sarah sat up to open the box again.

‘Which one do you like best?’ she asked breathlessly.

‘Which, roughly translated, means which one costs least, I suppose! All four rings carry much the same price tag, which the jeweller was kind enough to remove be
fore handing them over.’ Jake grinned. ‘You see? I’m getting to know you so well!’

Sarah was dazzled by all the rings. But the one she loved at first sight was a cluster of tiny diamonds set in a cushion round a raised central ruby.

‘The others are modern, but that one’s circa 1905— Edwardian,’ said Jake, and took it from its slot to slide on Sarah’s finger.

‘That’s the one,’ she said immediately.

‘Try the others on.’

‘No point. I want this one.’

‘Then, just like me, Sarah Tracy,’ said Jake huskily, ‘it’s yours.’

T
O
S
ARAH’S
relief the evening with Davy was a great success. Full of excitement about going out to grown-up dinner, Davy was impatient for Jake to arrive, and when he did greeted him with an enthusiasm which delighted him. She was impressed by his car, loved eating in the Trout’s garden, and chattered away to Jake during the meal as though she’d known him all her life.

When Davy was in bed later, Jake followed Sarah into the sitting room and took her in his arms, rubbing his cheek against hers.

‘I’d say that that went pretty well!’

She hugged him tightly. ‘Wonderfully well. Tomorrow I’ll give her the news.’ She drew back to look up at him. ‘Unless you’d rather I waited until you tell your family.’

‘I was coming to that. How soon do you think you could bear the ordeal of family Sunday lunch
chez
Hogan? I warn you now, Mother will round up all the usual suspects for the occasion, so if you can’t face that just yet I can leave it a while.’

‘Only until my grandmother comes back. I’d better break the news to her first, but after that any time you like. I’m looking forward to meeting them.’

‘We’ll take Davy along too, of course.’ Jake chuckled. ‘By the way, when you were making coffee just now she repeated her invitation to sports day.’

Sarah laughed. ‘Something tells me it won’t take her
long to get used to the idea of
you
as a stepfather.’ She sobered. ‘Though you’ll really be her brother-in-law.’

‘No one else on the planet needs to know that,’ said Jake emphatically.

‘True.’ Sarah breathed in deeply. ‘But I’m so glad
you
do. I never thought I’d find anyone I could share my secret with, Jake. Ever.’

He kissed her very gently. ‘I’m grateful for the privilege. And now,’ he added with regret, ‘I must go. But I’ll be waiting on tenterhooks tomorrow, to hear Davy’s reaction to the news.’

‘I’ll come straight to your place from Roedale,’ promised Sarah. ‘Though somehow I don’t think there’s much to worry about.’

Sarah was right. When she broached the subject next day, straight after breakfast, Davy positively fizzed with excitement.

‘Yippee! I
like
Jake. Does he like me, Mummy? Can I tell Polly? When are you going to get married? Will you wear a long white dress? Can I be bridesmaid?’

‘Jake likes you very much,’ said Sarah, limp with relief. ‘And of course you can be bridesmaid. But we have to wait until Grandma gets back before we tell anyone.’

‘OK,’ said Davy, obviously happy to agree with anything. Her suntanned face glowed with satisfaction. ‘I like Jake a lot,’ she added, in case there was any doubt.

‘More than Brian, obviously,’ said Sarah dryly.

Davy gave her a scornful look. ‘Jake’s cool. He talks to me as if I’ve got a brain. I asked him to come to sports day. I hope he does.’

Sarah laughed. ‘I’ll tell him.’

‘Ring him now!’

‘Thank God,’ was Jake’s response when Sarah informed him of Davy’s approval. ‘Now I can enjoy
Sunday lunch. Though it’s going to be hard to keep the news to myself.’

‘Just another few days and the entire world can know,’ Sarah promised him.

With Davy back in school, and Margaret Parker still away, Jake took it for granted that Sarah would spend every possible moment with him, and she rushed home every day to do her homework in record time before he arrived. He refused to let her cook, and took her out to eat or ordered something in, but, whether they spent time in Campden Road or at his flat, by mutual consent the evening always ended early, in bed.

‘It won’t always be like this,’ said Jake one night, as they lay in each other’s arms, quiet at last. ‘But right now I need to make the most of every minute.’

‘You mean before my grandmother gets home and Davy finishes school?’ Sarah moved back a little to look into his eyes. ‘Look, Jake, are you really sure about this?’

He grasped her by the shoulders. ‘Loving you?’ he demanded.

‘No. I know you love me—’

‘I should bloody well hope so by now,’ he said fiercely, and kissed her hard. ‘So no more doubts, woman. At the moment I tend to rush you to bed the moment I see you, which means we haven’t discussed certain aspects of our future. So, as soon as my ring is officially on your finger instead of round your neck, I suggest we start thinking about somewhere to live. A house that’s big enough for you, me, Davy, plus any future additions. So don’t even think of backing out now, Sarah.’ He smiled suddenly. ‘You can’t now, anyway. I’ve paid for the ring.’

‘Then of course I won’t. I love that ring.’ Sarah buried her face against his shoulder. ‘I love you, too, Jacob Hogan.’

‘In that case,’ he whispered, ‘let me remove any last, lingering doubts from your mind, my darling. You belong to me. And I’m going to have you.’

‘Now?’

‘Now!’

When Sarah picked her grandmother up from the airport Margaret Parker received the news with deep misgiving as they drove home.

‘This comes as a shock, Sarah. I’ve always hoped that one day you’d find someone to trust with the truth, of course, but you’ve only just met this man.’

‘But I knew from the first that I could trust Jake,’ Sarah assured her. ‘And quite apart from that I like him so much, as well as being madly in love with him.’ She turned steady eyes on her grandmother’s set face for a moment. ‘I think I deserve this. So try to be happy for me. Please.’

Margaret Parker let out a deep sigh. ‘Very well, Sarah. I’ll do my best. When will I have the opportunity for congratulations?’

‘This evening. Jake’s coming to dinner. He wanted to take us out, but I wasn’t sure how you’d feel after the flight so he’s having a meal sent in.’

‘How kind of him,’ said Margaret, thawing somewhat. ‘Have you met any of the Hogan family yet?’

‘Not yet. We were waiting for you to get back. Jake’s just waiting for me to give the go-ahead before telling his parents. At which point,’ Sarah warned, ‘he says his mother will immediately gather the Hogan clan together for a celebration meal to meet the three of us.’

Margaret eyed Sarah searchingly. ‘How did Davy take to the idea of Jake as a stepfather?’

‘With tremendous enthusiasm. She’s even invited him to sports day. Now, tell me all about Florence.’

With Jake on terrific form, and Sarah, ring prominently displayed, so obviously floating on a pink cloud, Margaret Parker unbent enough to drink a congratulatory toast in the champagne Jake had brought, but she retired to bed straight after the meal.

‘Jet lag,’ she explained, as she said goodnight.

‘Jet lag after a two-hour flight?’ said Jake, once she’d gone upstairs. ‘Or does she disapprove of me?’

‘Not of you, personally.’ Sarah shrugged. ‘She’s just in a state because you know the truth. You’ll have to give her time to come round. I didn’t expect her to be happy about it straight away.’

He took her in his arms, rubbing his cheek against her hair. ‘The important thing to me is that
you
are happy.’

‘I am. Blissfully,’ sighed Sarah. ‘Though I hope your family shows more enthusiasm than Grandma did.’

‘Of course they will. I’ll tell them this weekend, to give my mother enough notice to kill the fatted calf.’

‘I’m a bit nervous,’ confessed Sarah.

Jake turned her face up to his, his eyes utterly serious. ‘You have nothing to worry about where my family is concerned. But even in the unlikely event that they do disapprove, it won’t make a shred of difference, Sarah. As long as you love me, nothing else matters.’

When Jake arrived on the Friday evening Davy rushed to open the door to him, and told him in no uncertain terms that she was thrilled about the forthcoming wedding. Over supper Davy chattered incessantly, and was
almost as downcast as Sarah when she heard Jake was away next day.

‘But it’s Saturday. I hoped you’d go swimming with us, Jake,’ she said, disappointed.

‘I’d much rather do that than talk boring old business in Birmingham,’ he assured her. ‘The people I need to see are only available tomorrow, unfortunately.’ He slanted a glance at Sarah. ‘Let me take you out to Sunday lunch instead.’

‘Grandma always cooks that,’ said Davy.

‘We’ll ask her to come out with us, to give her a rest. Then the following weekend you can all have Sunday lunch with
my
family,’ said Jake.

It was a prospect which occupied Sarah constantly during the time away from Jake, but when he arrived to take them out for Sunday lunch, as arranged, he made a thumbs-up sign when Sarah opened the door to him, and told her that his entire family were delighted with his news.

‘Liam, too,’ he added.

‘I’m looking forward to meeting him,’ said Sarah. Which wasn’t exactly true. She had qualms about meeting all the Hogans. ‘Grandma thanks you for your invitation, by the way, but she’s not feeling too good. Migraine.’

‘I’m sorry about that. Tell her I hope she’ll join us next time.’

Much to Davy’s delight Jake drove her back to Roedale later, where her day was crowned by the triumph of telling Polly about the wedding.

‘No problem about going back to school tonight,’ said Jake, laughing as the child made a bee-line for her friends.

‘She’s settled in very well now—even wants to stay
on a week for summer school. They make dens in the school grounds, put on plays, go on picnics, and so on,’ said Sarah on the journey back to Jake’s flat. ‘I’m glad Davy’s spreading her wings at last.’

‘Does it mean extra expense?’ asked Jake. ‘If so, let me pay, darling.’

She smiled at him gratefully. ‘Thanks for the offer, but it’s sorted already, from my nest-egg fund.’

He gave her one of his straight looks. ‘When I’m her stepfather I’ll consider it my prerogative to foot her bills, Sarah.’

‘And so you shall. But not until we’re married.’ She shrugged. ‘Silly, I know, but it would seem too much like tempting fate beforehand.’

‘Sarah.’ Jake took her in his arms as they went up in the lift. ‘I know life’s dealt you a tough hand to play in the past, but from now on things will be different, I promise. You have my personal guarantee.’

Sarah was happy to believe him. Other than her grandmother’s lukewarm attitude to her engagement, the only cloud left on her horizon was the prospect of meeting Jake’s family. Despite Jake’s assurances to the contrary, she was still convinced that the Hogans would have preferred their son’s bride to produce a daughter after the marriage rather than nine years beforehand.

Glad of the pink dress for the occasion, Sarah decided that new shoes would be good for her morale. The frivolous sandals worn to the wedding wouldn’t do to meet her future in-laws. A little frisson of excitement ran down her spine at the mere thought of in-laws, just the same, simply because it brought home the reality of marrying Jake.

As soon as Sarah finished work next day she hit the shops. An hour later, in possession of classic fawn
pumps, she was on her way back to the office to collect her usual homework when her heart gave a leap of recognition as she caught sight of Jake in the familiar car he’d parked under the trees in the Parade. She hurried down the pavement, waving to attract his attention, then dropped her hand, colour draining from her face when a woman slid into the passenger seat and brought Jake’s face down to hers. Rooted to the spot, Sarah stared in sick disbelief while she watched him kiss his companion with a casual familiarity which turned her stomach. Yet for the life of her she couldn’t look away. When he raised his head at last he looked straight at Sarah, raised a quizzical eyebrow, gave her an outrageous wink, smiled his famous, eye-crinkling smile and drove off.

Sarah walked back to the office in a daze. She collected the mail, said her goodbyes, and started for home through a world disintegrating in jagged pieces all around her. But Sarah’s numbness gave way to anguish as she thought of Davy. What possible explanation could she give Davy for changing her mind about marrying Jake? The truth was too unpalatable for herself, let alone a nine-year-old child. What a fool she’d been. And she had only herself to blame for letting it get so far. It had been her own fault, right from asking to share the bridal suite to the point where she’d literally begged Jake to make love to her.

‘You look terrible. What’s wrong?’ demanded Margaret Parker, who was paying off a taxi when Sarah arrived home.

‘The engagement’s off,’ said Sarah, and closed the door behind them as they went inside.

Her grandmother stared in astonishment. ‘Good heavens, Sarah. Why?’

‘I’ve just seen Jake with another woman.’

To her credit, Margaret Parker patted Sarah’s shoulder in an attempt at comfort. ‘Could it have been a sister, perhaps?’

‘I certainly hope not, the way they were kissing.’ Sarah’s eyes flashed gold fire.

‘Where on earth was all this going on?’

‘In a car parked in full view in the Parade.’

Margaret’s eyes widened incredulously. ‘There must be some mistake, surely.’

‘If someone else had told me I might have swallowed that. But seeing is believing. He looked straight at me after—after kissing the woman.’ Sarah’s teeth began to chatter. ‘He—even
smiled
—at me.’

Margaret marched her granddaughter into the kitchen. ‘Sit there. I’ll be back in a minute.’

Too dazed with misery to wonder where her grandmother was going, Sarah sat slumped at the kitchen table until Margaret came back with a glass.

‘Brandy. Drink it up.’

Sarah, rather astonished by her grandmother’s concern, obeyed, spluttered as her teeth knocked at the glass, then as the taste registered tears ran down her cheeks. ‘He gave me brandy when I told him my story at the hotel,’ she sobbed. ‘I
trusted
Jake. What a fool I was!’

Margaret handed her a tissue. ‘I can’t deny I disapproved when you said you’d confided in him, but after getting to know him a little I would have sworn myself that Jake Hogan could be trusted.’

Sarah blew her nose, then took a deep breath. ‘It’s not just for myself. I can get over it. It’s Davy I’m concerned about. She likes Jake so much.’ She shuddered. ‘But I just can’t bear the fact that he knows such personal things about me.’