Sandra Hill (25 page)

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Authors: Hot,Heavy

BOOK: Sandra Hill
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“For what?”

“Ian’s wife.”

“I’m not really Ian’s wife.”

“Oh?”

“It’s just a temporary arrangement, as you well
know,” Madrene snapped. All this false niceness was wearing thin with her. “And frankly, I am glad you have come to visit. There are a few things I would like to say to you. How dare you treat Ian the way you do?”

“I beg your pardon.”

“You should beg
Ian’s
pardon.”

Ian’s father looked as if he was either choking on his tongue or choking back laughter.

“A father should love his children above all else.”

“I do.”

“Hah! Not according to Ian. Nothing he does is good enough for you. Push, push, push, that is what you do. Well, someday you may push so hard you lose a son. You may have already.”

“You are a brassy miss.”

“Yea, I am, and do not forget it. Do not look down your nose at me. I carry the blood of Norse kings in my body.”

“Okay, young lady, why don’t you tell me what you think I have done.”

Madrene did just that. It was a long and nagging lecture, even for her. When she stopped to take a breath, she noticed that both the admiral and Cage were gaping at her. Her lectures often had that effect on people … mostly men. “Well, it’s the truth,” she concluded.

Ian’s father threw his head back then, slapped his knees and burst out laughing. So hard that tears filled his eyes, and he had to wipe them with a spotless linen he pulled from his pocket. “You’ll do, missy.”

Now that she’d spoken her mind, she asked, “Would you care for a beverage?”

“Actually, yes. Any beer in the house?”

“There is always mead here. Seals suck it up like air.”

The old man grinned at her. Then he stood and held out his hand to pull her up. When he did, he tugged her into a hard hug and said, “Yes, you will do.”

Madrene looked at Cage over the admiral’s shoulder, pleading for help. He just grinned and said, “I’ll go get the … mead.”

When did his life become such a mess? …

Ian was in the SEAL headquarters catching up on some paperwork. His cell phone rang. He looked at the caller i.d. and groaned.

“Hi,” Cage said in sort of a whisper.

“Hi yourself. Do not dare ask me if I know what my wife is doing now.”

There was a long silence.

“Are you there?”

“Yep. I’m in the head. Don’t wanna be overheard.” He was still talking in a whisper.

Ian exhaled with a loud whoosh. “I give in. What is my wife doing now?”

“Well, it’s not so much what she’s doing. It’s the visitor who came to see her.”


What?
” Ian shouted into the phone.

“Really,
cher
, you’ve gotta work on your phone personality. My eardrums are developing a ring.”

“Tell … me …” he gritted out.

“Your father came to visit Maddie.”

This was the absolute last thing Ian expected to hear. He was angry with Maddie, but, God, his father would make mincemeat of her. “Why did he come?”

“Not sure. Guess he wanted to look over your better half.”

Ian snorted his opinion.

“Man, you woulda been proud of her. She laid into your dad like some kinda warrior princess. She was a pit bull for you.”

For me? Why would she defend me? Interfering witch!
“And what did my father do?”

“He hugged her.”

Hugged her? I think I will go slit my wrists.
“Where is he … she … now?”

“They’re sharing a
mead
in the kitchen and exchanging family secrets. I didn’t know you peed the bed till you were three. Ha, ha, ha. What’s that noise I hear?”

“My head banging on the desk.”

Wacky or woo-woo? …

Ian was ambushed three days later as he left the mess hall. Geek, Omar and Pretty Boy stood in his path.

“We need to talk to you about Maddie. She—” Geek started to say.

“The last thing we need to talk about is Maddie,” Ian interrupted. He put up both hands to halt them. “Unless she has flown the coop
again
, unless her life is in danger, unless your lives are in danger
from her
, I don’t want to hear it.”

“You should hear this,” Omar said.

“No. My nerves are strung so tight, they could slinky me down the steps of the Washington Monument.”

“Frustration will do that to you every time,” Pretty Boy opined.

“Bite me!” Ian said succinctly. “Get back to work. All of you.”

The three of them just looked at him, said “Okay” as one, and turned to walk away into the mess hall.

“Shit!” They were actually going to leave without telling him the latest on Maddie. Forget about the fact he’d told them he didn’t want to know. They should have told him anyway. With a sigh of resignation, he called, “Wait!”

The three stooges turned and smiled at him, as if they’d known he would be curious. Soon they were sitting down to coffee.

Geek started first. “There is something really strange about Maddie.”

Ian raised his eyebrows. “Tell me something I don’t know.”

“Seriously, Mac, it’s not just the way she talks,” Omar said. “And believe me, some of the random words in her speech are more like the tenth or eleventh century than today. In fact, I’ve heard Icelanders speak the way she does.”

“Iceland!” he said with disgust.

“Yep. And the Icelandic language is similar to Old Norse.”

“Norse! Oh, hell! This reminds me of Magnusson and all the Viking crap he used to spout.” Max was Torolf Magnusson’s nickname. “Where is Max these days?” He directed that last question to Cage, who was usually Max’s team partner. Max had been the biggest pain in Ian’s butt three years ago when Ian had been his instructor in BUD/S training.

“Still in Afghanistan working with a combined special forces team trying to teach fighting skills to
guys who ride camels.” Cage grinned. “He should be back next week or the week after.”

Actually, Ian knew Max would be back by then. His sister was married to Max’s brother, Ragnor. In fact, there was a big shindig being planned at Blue Dragon Vineyard in two weeks to celebrate some event related to grapes.

“There’s more,” Geek said, his voice too serious for Ian’s comfort. “Hordaland … that country where Maddie says Norstead is … well, I couldn’t find Norstead anywhere, but Hordaland was a region of southwest Norway about a thousand or so years ago. It wasn’t called Norway then. There was a king called Olaf … you know, the guy she says was her grandfather’s brother. Birka was a market town in Sweden, and Hedeby was a market town in Germany, though they weren’t called Sweden or Germany then.” Geek paused, not because he was done with his spiel, but because he wanted Ian’s reaction. Apparently, he’d already discussed his discoveries with Omar and Pretty Boy.

Ian was dumbfounded.

His silence gave Pretty Boy an opportunity to offer his input. “On an everyday level, she’s clueless. She honest-to-God never heard of a TV, a blender, a camera, the telephone, birth control, breast implants, things everyone knows.”

Ian homed in on one thing. “Why would you be discussing birth control with my … with Maddie?”

Pretty Boy shrugged. “She asked. Guess you must have shown her a condom. Right?” The dunce grinned.

Ian refused to answer. “And breast implants? Don’t try to tell me she asked about that?”

“Nope. I asked her.”

“What?” he yelled.

“Come on, Mac. Even you wondered in the beginning.”

“What did she say?” Cage inquired. Geek seemed even more interested.

“Get a life!” Ian advised them all before Pretty Boy could respond. After glaring at each of them in turn, he asked, “So what do you think all this means?”

“I think she’s a time-traveler,” Geek said.

Ian’s jaw dropped.

“Nah! I think she might have a slight mental problem,” Omar said. “Maybe even a split personality.”

Ian’s eyes widened.

“Uh-uh!” Pretty Boy said. “Gotta be reincarnation.”

They all looked at Ian to see what he thought.

“I think you all have lost your freakin’ minds,” he said. “And I think I need to get knee-walking drunk.”

As he walked away, he heard Cage say to the others, “Personally, I think he needs to get laid … again.”

Yep!

Beware of pre-menstrual women …

Madrene had come to several conclusions.

One, time was of the essence. Soon the seals’ mission here would be completed, and she would embark on her own mission. She could not do it alone, even if she hired mercenaries. She needed someone from this country to help her find her way back to hers. ’Twas a sorry fact.

Two, if she might die any day now, or if she didn’t die and had to go home alone, she was bloody hell going to enjoy herself in the meantime. That meant sex. With the troll. Lots of it.

Three, as unpalatable as it might be, she would use sex to gain her noble goal.

Oh, she knew she was changing her mind in mid-stream. Technically, she was the one who had called off the bedsport. But her body ached for the man, despite all her good resolutions. It was probably because it was several days before her monthly flux, and she was always different at that time … some might even say difficult. Or mayhap it was because the bedsport had been so good with him. Or it might be all that
Sex and the City
watching that gave her ideas.

Whatever the reason, she was now on a mission. Seduce the man to her way of thinking.

No problem!

On the other hand, there might be a small problem.
She had no idea how to go about seducing a man. Perhaps she needed help. She wished there were a woman she could ask. But there was not. Should she ask Cage for advice? Or Pretty Boy? Or Slick? She was almost afraid of what he would say; he was such a dark and secretive man. But Omar probably knew unusual stuff since he came from both an Arab and Indian background. And Geek, and JAM, and Sly.

Bloody hell! I guess I’ll have to ask them all.

You want to do WHAT? …

Slick was the first seal that Madrene was able to corner about her particular problem.

Slick rarely came into the house. Usually he was one of the outside guards, or stayed back at the base. The man made her a little uncomfortable, he was so quiet, and he had these dark, piercing eyes. When he looked at you, well, you felt as if he saw too much.

But Madrene had never been one to cower when she had something to say. “What can I do to seduce Ian?” she asked as Slick was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

She knew he heard her because he stopped in the middle of pouring. But he didn’t say anything. At first. Then he turned, very slowly, and looked at her. A long time. Then he said, “Breathe.”

Hah! A lot of good that advice was.
Breathe and the troll would be seduced. I … do … not … think … so.
She walked huffily out of the room.

Next day, she asked Geek. The poor boy just blushed and stammered before saying, “Can’t you just ask him to … uh, make love with you?”

“Of course not. I want him to think he is the one doing the seducing.”

“Oh, I see,” Geek said. But he clearly didn’t see.

Next, Sly told her to flash him. She hesitated to ask him what he meant because of the grin on his face, but she did.
I should have known better.
Then he demonstrated by putting both fists at the center of his tea-
shert
and jerking his arms outward.

What? He expects me to expose my breasts.
“There is no subtlety in that.”

“Believe me, men don’t need subtlety.”

JAM was not subtle, either. He said, “A blow job.”

At first she didn’t understand what he meant. When she did, her jaw dropped. “A priest recommends such a thing? I am … shocked.”

He grinned and said, “An almost-priest. I never took holy orders.”

“And that makes a difference. How?”

He laughed and told her, “Even St. Augustine said he wanted to be good … but not yet.”

Omar suggested she try belly dancing and actually showed her how. “The trick is to be wearing very little clothing,” he said. “Preferably, a few sheer scarves.”

“Oh, now I know what you mean. They used to do these dances in the harems.”

Omar just rolled his eyes at her. They all did when she mentioned the harems.

Pretty Boy had some of the best ideas. Tight jeans, a boosty-air and red lip rouge. He was going to bring them for her tomorrow.

Cage, the rascal, just laughed and laughed. In the end, he suggested a place called Victoria’s Secret, and said they could order some garments, delivered overnight, from the Inner-net.

So Maddie was all set. Too bad Ian was in such a bad temper when he got home. Oh, well. She needed a little time anyhow, to bolster her nerve.

But tomorrow, he’d better watch out.

Chapter Fourteen

She hit him with her best shot …

Ian came home early the next day.

The net was drawing in on the tangos. All of Team Thirteen was now involved in the mission. CIA operatives were all over the place, as well. These were mean sons-of-bitches that had been sent to either kidnap or take Maddie down. The SEALs could have eliminated a few of the more careless ones already, but they were going for the whole bunch of tangos. So it was a high-stakes waiting game.

You’d never know anything was up inside his home, though. There was a sort of normalcy here … although any space with Maddie in it could hardly be called normal. He used the remote garage-door opener, drove into the garage, then used a key to enter the house through the side door of the kitchen. Immediately he was hit with the tantalizing smell of something good cooking on the stove … probably
Cage’s famous crab gumbo, since he was the SEAL assigned inside today. Yep, home sweet home.

Maybe I should just yell out, “Honey, I’m home.”

On the other hand, considering her mood lately, I don’t think so.

Still, there was a part of him that wondered what it would be like to come home to a wife … and a kid or two. And what if that wife were Maddie? And what if those kids looked just like a combination of the two of them? And what if they were happy as hell to see him?

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