Sand and Sin (18 page)

“No. I got her hopes up once before. I don’t want to disappoint her again.” Shifting on his seat didn’t ease his discomfort. Damn, he should let her use those luscious lips on him the way she wanted.

“Jax, she’s in love with you. You saved her daughter. I don’t think you can disappoint her.” He took a hard pull on his longneck beer.

“It’s harder than I imagined, TJ. I’ve missed her. And when Haley was taken captive, I couldn’t be there for her.” He already dreaded not knowing when he’d see her again.

“You were instrumental in getting her daughter back. You know the mission CO will put in a good word for you. This should seal the deal.”

“Unless someone with higher rank wants to stall things.” He rolled ice around in his drink.

“Yeah, like her ex.” TJ raised his bottle for another brew.

“Guess I’ll find out in the next few days.” Jax drained his drink.

TJ’s girlfriend, Amy, and some other girls danced in the corner by the jukebox to one of Nickelback’s drinking songs. Peri made her way to him and poured him another whiskey.

“Last one ’til we get home.” She winked.

Home. He loved the way she said the word, like he belonged there with her. Soon, he hoped. He rubbed the stubble on his chin. Maybe he was getting ahead of himself.

After his drink, he exited the darkened bar, grabbed his bag and computer from CJ’s truck, and joined Peri in her waiting pick-up. The first time she’d driven him to her place he didn’t remember. He’d been pissed about being taken off the teams after catching a bullet, but the spunky bartender at the Trident opened his heart about what he really needed.

He reached over and twirled one of her curls around his finger. “This seems vaguely familiar.”

Oncoming headlights highlighted her easy smile. “At least you’re coherent this time.”

Beyond coherent, he practically throbbed in want and need of her rocking body. To have her beneath him, crying out his name. Even with their small talk, the five-minute drive seemed to take forever.

As soon as the truck rolled onto her driveway and she shifted into park, he unhitched her seatbelt and drew her onto his lap. “I’m definitely awake and plan to keep you up for quite a while.”

She didn’t protest. Instead, she grazed her teeth along his jawline, jacking his arousal off the charts. On a whisper, she said, “I promised myself I’d swear off of you.”

“What am I, a bad habit or something?” He squeezed her rear.

“Something like that.”

He opened the door and stepped out, itching to throw her over his shoulder and play caveman, but he restrained his primitive urge. Instead, he withdrew his keys from his pocket and walked her to the front door. Of course he’d kept a set when he changed the locks this past spring.

She arched a brow as she curbed a smile.

“You don’t trust your handyman?” he questioned over his shoulder as he opened the door.

“Don’t trust myself.” She followed him inside.

What the hell was she going to do? Peri strode for the kitchen and poured a whiskey. She stared at the amber liquid and began to shiver. Damn, why hadn’t she taken the pregnancy test? Besides being scared shitless, she’d been slammed at work. Jax’s timing was horrific.

He stepped in close behind her, resting his chin on her shoulder. “Angel?”

Normally his warmth secured her, but tonight uncertainty chilled her to the core. She faced him and longed to absorb the heat of his gaze. What would he say if she said she might be pregnant? Men wanted facts. Jax would be no different.

“You’re trembling.” He rubbed her arms.

“I’m sorry.”

“Peri?” He drew her against him and held her tight even as she squirmed. “What’s wrong? Talk to me, baby.”

Simple words eluded her. Ripe tears hung ready to fall. She shook her head, pushed him away, and retreated to the den. “I can’t.”

“Why?”

She stared at the pool. He probably believed she’d lost her mind. Her actions suggested she teetered on the edge of some break.

“What’s changed since we left the Trident a few minutes ago?” He voiced his confusion against the shell of her ear.

Nothing, except she’d landed back in reality after the mind-blowing orgasm he’d provided in her office. Her betraying body ached for his comfort. For the release he provided. For him to swallow her whole in absolution. She straightened and faced him.

Her answer spilled out, sounding cold. “I really thought you’d head for California so I’d have time to figure things out.” Would he hate her? Years ago in a similar position, she’d imagined her pilot lover would have. So she never mentioned to him she thought she was pregnant with his child. Jax had risked his life to save her daughter. Would this man run from his own eighteen years of obligation?

He pleaded in a soft voice, “Whatever it is, let me help you. Is this about me not telling you I already knew about Haley and her father being taken?”

Did he really believe she was upset over him not breaking protocol while rescuing her daughter? Geez, men didn’t have a clue. “Lord, Jax, I’m not that shallow.”

He scrubbed through his hair, and closed in on her. “You’ve fallen for some other frogman?”

She shook her head.

“You’re healthy, right?” He gave her a crooked smile.

Maybe too fertile. “Yes.”

He swept his arms around her and caressed her ear with eager lips. “Then we’ll work out whatever’s got you spooked. I know we said we’d let things cool until there was an opportunity for me to get east, but…after Haley, it’s all different. Isn’t it, Angel?”

The answer he sought must have been written on her face.

Tipping her chin, he claimed her mouth. The soft swirl of his tongue along hers produced temporary amnesia he deepened his kiss and carried her down the hall to her bedroom. His ocean-scented aftershave reminded her of their OBX trip and their walks on the beach in front of his condo.

“Better?” After laying her on her white ruffled comforter, he clicked on the lamp beside the bed.

She had never brought him to her bedroom because he wouldn’t be permanent. Then he flew across the world to save her daughter. “You always make me better.”

“Tell me what’s spooked you, Peri.” His dark stare commanded.

“I’m late.” She held her breath.

* * * *

“Okay.” He maintained his calm, stroking her cheek, hoping she didn’t feel his heart racing with excitement. What if she didn’t feel the same? Fear sliced through his gut like a mission gone cluster-fucked.

He was in quicksand and sinking fast. Would speaking the truth win her or subject him to tormented loneliness without her? “I love you, Peri. Whatever you decide, I’m here for you.”

For the next few hours at least.

Relief smoothed the lines on her forehead. She checked her tears and released a long breath. Her cheeks glowed pink and she curved her arms around his neck. “I love you, too. Make love to me.”

He sank against her warm body. The hot tingle of her fingers along this spine under his shirt had him tearing off the garment. Needing to be skin to skin, he worked off her top.

Her breasts nearly spilled over the satiny cups of her bra.

The teasing display has him longing to feast on them, as well as the rest of her body. She moaned as he latched onto a budded nipple that begged to be tasted.

Through a rush of breath, she said, “I thought you might be running for the door.”

His job required him to face fear and adversity. If another woman lay beneath him, he’d be wishing for a negative test. But for her, his Angel, he only wanted her happy. Even if it might mean she didn’t want a child of his. He pushed the dreadful thought aside. “I flew to Egypt, swam a mile in the Med while toting a rifle, and faced a group of armed men for your daughter. What wouldn’t I do for you or my own child?”

Peri frowned a second and glanced away. “I should be ashamed after all you’ve done for Haley and me.”

Ashamed? She should be his wife, baby or not, but he needed to be patient. “You’ve been under a lot of stress.” He trailed a line of kisses along her neck and down to the center of her chest. “Nothing exists but you and me.”

Her eyelids closed, and he took her deep sigh as agreement. In a slow easy manner, he continued worshiping her soft skin. He removed her sandals, her jeans, and turned her on her stomach. With easy strokes, he massaged her shoulders and unhooked her bra. Working his way down to her lower back, he licked his lips and proceeded to knead her rear.

Desire coiled in his belly as he peeled down her bikini panties before giving her hamstrings and calves equal attention.

When he reached her feet, she moaned.

“Ahh, I should have known.”

Her reply came through the comforter, sounding muffled. “I’m a runner.”

“And a bartender who’s always on her feet.” SEAL training number one, find the target’s weakness. Use their flaw against them or to woo them.

She turned over as his thumbs worked the slender arch of one foot and then the other. He slid off the foot of the four-poster bed and shed his jeans and boxer briefs.

Propping up on her elbows, she studied his nudity as her pale green gaze darkened.

What she did to him. He grasped his throbbing cock and stroked.

“You gonna keep me waiting?” She licked her lips.

His balls tightened. He wanted her hard and fast, but she deserved to be worshipped before he fed his need. Palming her thighs apart, he bent and drew his tongue along her folds for a delicate taste. Oh, yes. Tangy sweet. Wet and ready for him.

Jax ached to be inside her tight channel. He grasped her hips and tugged her to the end of the mattress. Her pussy glistened in the low light as he smoothed a hand over her flat belly.

Would she grow round with his child? Boy or girl?

She clasped his hand.

Still standing, he inched closer and guided his weeping head to her entrance. “Angel.”

“Please.” She surrounded him with those long legs.

With a rock of his hips, he buried himself deep. If he were to drown, this was definitely the way he wanted go.

* * * *

Before dawn, Peri slipped from the sheets and into the bathroom without disturbing Jax. Her first feat. It’d been over fifteen years since she’d taken a pregnancy test. After following the directions, she waited.

While he seemed okay about the possibility, at nearly thirty-four she remained pensive. Hell, she owned a bar. She’d have to work lunch shift indefinitely.

Holding her breath, she studied the digital display of the test. With a long exhale, she glanced at the box again. Ninety-nine percent accurate.

She quietly opened the door.

Jax leaned against the dresser with arms folded and a cocky tilt to his head.

How stupid of her to believe she could sneak around on a master of stealth. She showed him the test and offered an apologetic smile. “Looks like we’ll have to keep trying.”

“I’m up for that.” With a wink, he pulled her into his arms and seized her mouth.

A vibration on the nightstand broke their kiss. “You need to answer it?”

He loosened his hold and grimaced. “Probably.”

As he retrieved his phone, Peri headed to the kitchen and tossed some coffee beans in the grinder. She should be relieved about the test being negative. Instead, she felt lost. Plus, he’d leave soon.

The aroma of hazelnut reminded her of the morning after she’d brought Jax home. He’d come down from the room over the garage looking sexily disheveled and surprised to see her. His instant hard-on had her shocked almost to the point of laughter.

Near giggling at the memory, she poured fresh grounds into the coffee maker. Last night’s pleasure nearly made her forget the torturous hours spent in worry over Haley, which seemed like only a nightmare after waking in Jax’s arms.

How much longer would she have to wait to have him in her life full-time, or as full-time at the Navy would allow? Hours with him meant more to her than days had with her husband or even her first love. Fortune had smiled upon her for having known him.

Peri opened the fridge and stared at the contents.

“Let me make breakfast.” Jax came up behind her.

Her last meal before he jetted west? “Sure, tell me what you need.”

He poured her a cup of coffee and shooed her to the table before scavenging the refrigerator. A carton of eggs, sausage, and some cheese landed on the counter. “Looks like I’ve got a few more hours. My flight’s been delayed until this evening,” he said and disappeared into the pantry.

More time than she’d anticipated. Time to make minutes count. He’d taken care of her last night. This morning, she wanted to give him something he’d remember.

His low-slung shorts revealed the sexy line of hair below his stomach. She wanted to taste him. After breakfast, while in the shower, she planned to bring him to his knees while on hers. Then again, why wait?

“I’ll make sure you’re not bored.”

He glanced up from breaking an egg, wearing a dimpled smile. “Never happen with you, Angel.”

She let him to finish his casserole creation and place it in oven before she wandered over.

As he set the timer, she caught the waistband of his shorts and turned him to face her. “I need an appetizer.” She licked her lower lip.

His nostrils flared as his bare chest rose with a short breath.

Patting the counter, she urged him to sit.

She broke into a grin at the arch of his brow.

His shorts tented.

She gripped his solid bulge and grew wet. His groan only heighted her urge to play bad girl. Even after twice last night and once earlier this morning, he was ready again.

What could she do to make him always remember this morning with her? Whip cream had been overdone. What about chocolate syrup? Issuing an order not to move, she reached into the pantry and found an unopened bottle of caramel. Even better.

He stared as she freed his cock, which jerked to attention like a well-trained warrior. And oh, hadn’t it been. Now she’d train his willing beast to be loyal to her.

His tip wept in anticipation.

She bent and circled his ridged head with her warm tongue, building pressure on each revolution