Sanctuary Bay (18 page)

Nate didn't answer.

“It's the same for me with this scholarship,” she said. “I tell myself I would have found a way to go to college without it. But I don't know if that's true.” She took a deep breath. “Sanctuary Bay overlooked some stuff in my transcripts that most places wouldn't. They took a chance on me. They changed my life.”

Nate turned to face her. “You're amazing, and you deserve everything this place can give you.
Everything
. You did it, Sarah. You didn't let your past hold you back.”

“That's because of you,” she said. “You took a chance on me too, the very first day I got here. You told me the truth about yourself and that made me see things differently.”

“I could tell you deserved it,” he replied. “And you deserve even more. That's why I wanted you in the Wolfpack. The friends you make there are different from other friends, because of what we go through together.”

“I know. I've never had anything like it before.”

“And our packmates?” Nate said. “Think of the kind of families they have, the kinds of jobs they'll get after college. There will be doors open for you—for us—all over the place. Wolfpack members rule the world. I'm serious. Business, entertainment, politics, science, sports, media, there are Wolfpack alumni everywhere, at the highest levels, and after college, we're going to be there too.”

Conviction charged his voice, glowed in his eyes. He believed what he was saying with every molecule of his being. Listening to him, Sarah did too.

“That's what you said when I first met you,” she remembered. “You asked if I wanted to run things, and I did.”

“See?” Nate gave her The Grin. “I pegged you for the pack right from the start.”

Sarah smiled back, so glad he'd wanted her. “But we're not really going to kill someone, are we? I know you say going through so much together creates a bond, but…”

“For you and me, the Wolfpack is different than it is for everyone else. They have all the connections they need. We don't. We're not from this world.” He reached out and smoothed her hair away from her face. “All I can say is that you want to be with the pack on Halloween night.
I
want you there.”

Then he cupped her face in his hands, and kissed her, soft and sweet. It was the first time he'd kissed her outside one of the Wolfpack parties. It felt different out in the real world. It meant more. It wasn't just about fun.

Sarah slid her arms around Nate, and he deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring her mouth slowly. It was nothing like the hard, demanding kiss Ethan had given her that night after the movie.
Ethan?
Why was she thinking about Ethan? But now that she was, she couldn't stop. Was he watching from the bonfire?

Or maybe he's making out with his girlfriend,
she thought, ashamed of herself.
With my friend, Karina, nicest girl around. What did Matthias call her? The Sweetheart of Sanctuary Bay.

Sarah forced her attention back to Nate. It wasn't hard. Nate was difficult to ignore. She let her tongue flick against his, pulling him closer against her. He kissed his way down to the hollow of her throat, then back up to her ear. “Promise me you'll be with us on Halloween,” he whispered, his breath warm against her skin. “It won't be the same without you. And you'll regret it if you aren't there. Trust me.”

She wanted to believe him. She wanted the advantages the pack would give her. “I do. I will,” she whispered back before he again captured her mouth with his own.

*   *   *

Sarah's legs trembled beneath her ceremonial robe as she stood in the Bone Man room on Halloween night. She thought she could trust Nate, but she couldn't help feeling unsettled about what was going to happen tonight.

“Heil, Jager! Heil, Jager!”

Nate had appeared in the doorway holding the bowl of Blutgrog over his head. When the pack went silent, he called out the words that opened every ceremony. “Why do we gather here today?”

Sarah responded numbly.
We aren't going to really kill anyone,
she kept telling herself. All she had to do was follow instructions until it was revealed that the sacrifice was only symbolic or something.

“We will need strength for what we must do tonight,” Nate said once he reached the end of the usual call-and-response. He threw back his head and took a long drink from the bowl, then offered it to the person at the top of one of the two lines flanking the room. The hooded figure drank, then uncovered his face. Luke.

He drank, then held the bowl up to the next person while they drank. Grayson. Sarah was happy to see her here again—she hadn't been around since they branded her. Grayson brought the bowl to the lips of the person on her other side. Grayson's eyes were wide and fearful, the whites glistening with a slight orange tint in the torchlight.

The bowl traveled down the row until it reached Karina, who then held it while Sarah drank. The shift in Sarah's senses happened almost instantly, as always. Her fingertips now registered the tiny irregularities and roughness of the bowl's finish. She could smell Karina's shampoo, the vanilla scent of her lip gloss.

When she turned, Izzy's perfume, spicy and woodsy and mixed with the sharpness of sweat, overwhelmed her. Sarah could hear how rapid Izzy's breathing had become. Izzy, always so in control, seemed as agitated as Sarah felt. When she raised the bowl to Izzy's mouth, a vibration ran through the ceramic. From what, she wasn't sure. Tremors from Izzy's lips, or Sarah's fingers, or both?

When the ritual was complete, Nate strode to the front of the room. He reached through the ribs of the Bone Man and pulled out the metal bowl that had held the fire on the night of Grayson's punishment. Something inside it rattled as he turned to face the group.

“Tonight we will take a life together—and tonight, one of us will die.”

The atmosphere in the room changed instantly, became charged like the air before a thunderstorm. One of
them
was going to die?

“For a sacrifice to be meaningful, what is sacrificed must be beloved. Each of us is beloved to every member of our pack,” the Jager continued. “Tonight one of us will be sacrificed to make the Wolfpack stronger. We will honor the one who offers their life for the group forever. And the rest of us will be forever bound by taking a cherished life on this sacred night.” He held up the bowl reverently. “Inside are stones. All are black, except one. The pack member who chooses the white stone will be revered as our sacrificial victim.”

Still holding the bowl aloft, he walked back to the other end of the room. When he reached Luke, he nodded. Luke reached up and took a stone from the bowl.

Black.

The Jager moved to Grayson. Tears now streaked her cheeks. She took in a long, shuddering breath before raising her hand to take a stone.

Black. Grayson let out a relieved sob, knees buckling.

The Jager continued down the lines.

Black.

Black.

Black.

With each black stone, Sarah felt hysteria gripping her tighter and tighter. All the fears of not belonging came rushing back like mocking voices in her mind. Nate wanted her here tonight—was it a setup? Had they asked her to join them only to use her as a human sacrifice?

Black.

Sarah's pulse thundered in her ears. It was Karina's turn. She laughed a little as she thrust her hand into the bowl. She rolled the stones under her fingers, taking her time selecting one.

I'm next,
Sarah thought panicked, her heart beating erratically.

Karina opened her hand, her laugher stopping abruptly.

White.

 

10

We're not really going to kill Karina. We're not, we can't,
Sarah told herself as she walked through the woods with the rest of the group. The Blutgrog had turned each heartbeat into a drum strike that vibrated through her entire body, but the sound that pierced her, that threatened to shatter her, was Karina's soft crying. Karina didn't struggle as she walked, didn't try to free herself from Harrison and Luke, who each held one arm. But she hadn't stopped crying since the moment she drew the white stone.

Nate led the way to the clearing at the heart of the woods, the one where she'd seen them bury Luke. They called this place the Pine Tree, even though the forest was full of pines. This one was the biggest tree Sarah had ever seen, big enough that it blocked the sun so nothing grew underneath it. The clearing was wide, the ground a bed of soft reddish-brown pine needles. The moon hung low in the sky, huge, full and heavy, a deep orange color, as if it had been dipped in blood. The torch Nate held aloft glowed with almost the same color. He gestured to Luke and Harrison.

They pulled Karina up against the massive tree. Using a strip of black leather, they tied her wrists to an iron ring that had been screwed into the thick, dark trunk, high over her head.

It was one of the same leather strips they'd used at the first party, Sarah realized. This was going to turn out to be a game. It would probably even end with a party. The pack—her friends, her family—wouldn't kill anyone. Especially not Karina. Everyone loved Karina. It was impossible not to.

“Come to me,” the Jager ordered, and the pack gathered around him in the center of the clearing. “We will honor Karina in our hearts and in our history for her sacrifice. We will also honor the pack member who takes her life. It is something we do together, but only one of us can pull the trigger.” He handed the torch to Luke and pulled a handgun with a wooden grip and a long metal barrel from the depths of his robe.

Nate let the pistol rest in his palm as he held it out to them. “Who will take the honor? Who will act for all of us?”

“This is how Nate became the Jager,” Izzy whispered into Sarah's ear. “I heard there was a sacrifice before I joined, and Nate was the one who did it.”

Sarah tried to picture Nate, sweet, understanding Nate, shooting someone in cold blood. She shivered.
It could just be a rumor,
Sarah told herself. It had to be. Yet she knew that Nate was willing to do whatever it took to be a part of the Wolfpack, the best of the best.

Is that why he wanted me here?
she wondered.
Does he want me to take this pistol and put myself in line to be the next Jager?

She couldn't do it. Neither could anyone else.

For a moment, the only sounds were Karina crying, Sarah's pounding heart, and the crackle of pine needles as someone shifted from foot to foot. Then Hazel spoke up. “Couldn't we choose stones again? Or something like that?”

Hazel's voice shook with fear. She didn't seem to think it was a game. Sarah's heartbeat grew painful, as if an iron fist was squeezing and releasing it, over and over. A hard little seed of fear in her chest had started sprouting thorns.

“I thought you all understood why we had to do this,” Nate said, disapproval lacing his voice. “We must—”

“Oh fine, I'll do it.” Izzy snatched the pistol. She took a step away from the group, turned toward Karina, raised the gun, and fired. Brilliant white light from the muzzle illuminated Izzy's face. She was smiling.

“
No!
” The explosion of sound propelled Sarah into motion. She launched herself at Izzy and tackled her to the ground, sending the gun flying. “What did you do?” Sarah screeched. She grabbed Izzy by the shoulders, pinning the taller girl to the ground. “What did you do?”

“I did what had to be done,” Izzy replied calmly.

Sarah stared down into Izzy's eyes. They were expressionless and empty. An icy chill of shock ran up her spine. She forced herself to move, to stand on shaking legs, to look around. She and Izzy were alone in the clearing. Everyone else had run. Even Nate. Even
Nate.

Sarah turned toward Karina. Her head had flopped to one side, throwing her hood off. Her long dark hair fell over part of her face, but Sarah could see the dark irises of her eyes. They stared sightlessly, and her mouth hung open, as if she had died midscream. Sarah's throat made a soft clicking sound as she fought down bile.

“You killed her. You
killed
her!” Sarah accused, whirling back toward Izzy, who now stood picking at a bit of dirt caught in the velvet nap of her robe.

“So? It's not like I haven't done it before.” Izzy shrugged. “It was actually easier this time. You know, there's such a taboo against murder, but then you do it, and you realize, it's not that hard. You can do it again.”

“What?”

“It changes you,” Izzy said. “Must be why I was the only one with the balls to pull the trigger.”

“But that—that other time was an accident. You were fighting off a rapist,” Sarah protested.

Izzy twisted her mouth to the side, thinking. “Maybe. I mean, he certainly wanted to do me, and he didn't care what I wanted. But I knew exactly how sharp the corner of the table was. I knew the tabletop was made of marble. And I took very careful aim, and he hit that corner perfectly.”

Sarah just blinked at her. “But … Karina. Why would you kill Karina?”

Izzy smiled. “You sound so surprised. I told you the truth. You knew why I was at this school. You're the only one who knew—well, except Karina.” She glanced over at Karina's body, hanging limply by her hands, still tied to the iron ring. “But I guess she doesn't count anymore, dead and all. Anyway, someone had to do it. That's what we came out here for.”

“No. It was just supposed to be a … a game, like a mission, like when Luke was buried alive,” Sarah argued weakly. “Just pretend.”

“Talk to Grayson about
pretend,
” Izzy said. “Although that brand is cooler than a tattoo, in my opinion. Much more original. No, you can tell yourself we didn't really plan to kill Karina, but you know that's not true. Admit it, you were relieved I did it. It meant you didn't have to. But you're as guilty as I am. You heard the Jager. We all did this.
Together
.”