Safeword Quinacridone (43 page)

She’d pulled her wild mop into a loose ponytail when she took the bald cap off in the bathroom, and Travis slid it free now; his fingers soothing as he massaged the back of her head and gently finger-brushed her hair. “How was it bad, and how wasn’t it?”

“I was horrified for her at first. Watching the emotions battle across her face was awful, but it made me so horny I could barely breathe, and I was mortified at my reaction to her distress — it was as if her embarrassment spiked my arousal level. But then she was done and it was just pee, and you could tell she felt better once it was out, and the two of you cleaned it almost right away.” Cara knew she was rambling, but couldn’t help it. “It didn’t smell and it wasn’t yellow; and when she was done it was just
water
.” She shrugged. “I don’t know, it didn’t seem such a big deal, after it was over.”

“You looked grossed out when he made her drink his piss though.”

She shuddered. “Yeah. At first I was really turned on, but only because of the objectification. He said he needed his toilet, and that’s...” She trailed off, considering how to verbalize her point of view. “A toilet is a thing
,
but it’s like it’s the
lowest
of things, you know? Tables and lamps are way up on the hierarchy over toilets.”

Travis laughed. “People didn’t think so when only the rich had them. Humans haven’t always had indoor plumbing.”

She rolled her eyes. “I know, and if we didn’t have it now we’d place it higher I’m sure, but my point is toilets aren’t something most people strive to be. It goes beyond objectification, making you into not just an object but a
repulsive
object.”

Travis’ hand stilled, then moved to her face to tilt her head until he could see her eyes. “I know for a fact Paul isn’t disgusted by Meg taking part of him into her body. When he pisses on her, he’s marking her as his. When he requires she drink him down, she’s accepting him into her body, farther than his cock can ever go. It puts him into her stomach, bloodstream, kidneys — into her very cells. He sees it as an ultimate joining of the two of them.”

Cara felt her face take on a cynical expression as she said, “So, he drinks her piss too? You know, to complete their joining?”

Travis smiled, and kissed his fingertips before pressing them to her lips. “That’s not the way it works and you know it. The slave doesn’t invade the Master’s body; the Master owns the slave, and marks the slave as his. Tell me how you felt watching him piss into her mouth and seeing her throat work as she swallowed.”

Cara sighed
and
looked at her hands. “I was grossed out, even though I’ve read it’s not dangerous or unhealthy as long as the guy isn’t sick and you drink it as it’s coming out, so germs don’t have a chance to form and multiply.”

She stretched her neck up until she viewed him upside down. “The idea is a huge turn-on but I’m not so sure the reality would measure up. I still want to see someone being peed on, though.”

He nodded and caressed her face. “With our plans for the evening changed, if it doesn’t work out for you to see Paul piss on Meg we’ll coordinate something later. I found some video from Kinky Camp; we can watch it tomorrow if you like, and if you still want to see it in person I’ll make it happen. Now, tell me how you felt about being forced to piss while restrained.”

“If I hadn’t watched Meg pee on herself earlier I think I might have clicked out of it, so I’m glad you helped work me up to it. Thank you.”

He chuckled. “You’re very welcome.” His voice sobered as he added. “I watched pretty carefully and it didn’t look like were ever close to using the clicker.”

She shook her head. “I wasn’t. I asked you for the experience and I wanted to see it through. Plus, I saw how hard you were and I wanted to give it to you. Still, if it hadn’t happened during an orgasm it would’ve been way more difficult.”

“Yes, I know.” He smiled. “I hoped it’d work out that way. Was once enough or do you think you’ll want to do again?”

Cara thought it over a few minutes before answering. “It’s not something I’ll ask for, but I think it’s okay for you to throw it in every once in a while to spice things up and keep me on my toes
,
but only if it makes you hard. Don’t do it just for my benefit.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Trust me; it’s a huge turn-on for the monster.”

Shifting under her, he adjusted them so his hands were under her upper back and he pushed his fingers up into the muscles, massaging them. She groaned in pleasure and closed her eyes.

“Will you try to get me into armbinders again? I know my muscles will eventually stretch now, and you once said it could take a year to work up to it. I think I’d like to give it another try.”

Travis’s hands paused for a few heartbeats and then resumed kneading as he
replied,
“I’d love to, Cara Mia. I’ll talk to Jonathan to make sure I buy whatever equipment will make it easiest on both of us, and see if he can teach me what I need to know over the phone. If he thinks it necessary, would you be opposed to my bringing him down for a lesson?” He quickly added, “Not for you — a lesson for me so I
d
on’t hurt you by accident.”

She took a fortifying breath and said, “Actually, I think I might like some time with him one on one, without you around, to ask him some things.”

His hands stopped. “What things?”

“Just
...
I don’t know, exactly. I guess I’d start by asking him to explain his training program so I know everything he covers, and see if there’s something I should ask him to teach me. I mean, he trained a lot of the women you’ve played with
,
and I worry I don’t live up to their, ummm, performance ability, sometimes.”

His hands returned to massaging. “The only thing I’ve wanted from you that you didn’t jump into full steam ahead was the whole flexibility thing. It’s taken a while, but it’s even more special to me because it’s been so difficult for you.” He was quiet a moment and added, “If you want to talk to him
,
I’ll make sure you have the opportunity, but I don’t want you feeling you need him to teach you anything.”

She didn’t want to argue the point so she changed the conversation. “What do you think Paul and Meg are doing? Will they join us later?”

“They should be up before too much longer, though I don’t know if they’ll be in scene mode or casual. If they’re still observing formal rules treat it as normal — don’t talk to Meg unless Paul draws you into a conversation with her or you sense it’ll be okay. You’ve been in her position so you should have a good idea of where her head is and how she’ll want you to treat her.”

“It’ll be okay if we’re back to normal while they’re still Master and slave?”

“They’re always Master and slave
. S
ometimes the rules are formal and other times they’re relaxed
,
but he always owns her. As for your question, if we’re observing protocol it’ll add to their play, but if we’re not it still adds something by showing the dichotomy of slave with strict rules versus girlfriend with none. It works either way.”

Cara suddenly had an idea she wanted to paint — an abandoned garden near the ruins of an old house with only the fireplace and portions of the brick foundation remaining. An old iron fence would support a massive climbing rosebush that’d managed to survive without feeding, watering, or pruning. Parts of it would look mangy and bedraggled, obviously in need of a gardener. However, the blooms would be beautiful.

“Travis, I need to paint. I have several things in my head from the meteors and waterfalls, and I have these emotions in me now that I need to get out, somehow. I’m more than a week ahead of schedule with your graphics; can you make excuses for me so I can disappear into the solarium a few days? Or maybe longer?”

He nodded. “Of course, Cara Mia. If I can have you for about an hour and a half tomorrow before you start then we should be fine for a good three days. If you’re still painting Thursday I’m sure we’ll manage the meetings without you, but you don’t usually go non-stop for so long.”

She cocked her head up again, so she could see his face and gauge his reaction. “Not lately, but I have in the past and the way I’m feeling now
...
it’s a possibility.”

His smile was gentle, understanding. “Your art is part of who you are. I knew it from the beginning, before I even knew your name. I’ve learned your various moods and you look like you’re itching to go out there now, not tomorrow.”

She nodded. “Yeah, but we have guests and it’s been a long day. Once I start I won’t want to stop, so I’ll chill out tonight, get some sleep, and eat a good breakfast in the morning and go over whatever you need for the project. I should be in the solarium well before noon, and that’ll be soon enough.”

Chapter Twenty-Nine

When Cara arrived at the office for the meeting Thursday she was a little worried about her reception. She needn’t have been, as Travis had told them she’d gotten ahead on the project so she could spend some time painting.

She was at her desk sifting through the progress the team had made when Tricia poked her head in. “It’s good to have you back. Wow, you’re glowing. Are you sure you didn’t spend the last couple of days getting laid? Or maybe lying on a warm sandy beach with a massage therapist at your beck and call?”

Cara laughed. “Nope, just a manic three days of painting with hardly any sleep and then crashing about fourteen hours last night.” She decided to omit the part where Travis helped her doze off by flogging her and then fucking her into unconsciousness.

“My sister is a ballet dancer in New York,
” said Tricia, “
and when she first comes home she’s fine, but after she’s here a few days she gets all tense and bitchy. She brought a boyfriend once, a fellow dancer, and when she nearly bit my head off he took her to the garage and made her dance with him for hours, and she was fine again. He said that, for her, dancing’s more important than sleep.” She tilted her head. “Looking at you now, I think maybe your art’s the same?”

“Yeah, I guess it is.” Cara smiled; glad Tricia seemed to understand. “I enjoy working with the team and putting together the graphics you need. I love the challenge and the sense of teamwork, but it doesn’t feed my soul. A gallery owner once told me people are willing to pay more for art when the artist paints a piece of their soul into it, and he could point to the ones that’d taken a piece of me as I’d painted them. I’m still not sure how he knew
,
but it convinced me I’m not imagining the way it makes me feel.”

Tricia grinned. “I liked you from the start but the more I get to know you, the more I can see why Travis is so drawn to you.”

Cara leaned back in her chair and groaned. “If only Connie had liked me from the beginning. I’m guessing my being out of pocket all week while I painted has given fuel to her idea of my doing what I want because I’m fucking the boss.”

“Oh wow, you really are out of the loop. I’m not certain of the details, but Timothy fired her Tuesday afternoon and she went storming into Travis’ office
,
yelling about lawsuits just before security escorted her out of the building. Rumor has it she was screaming he didn’t know who you truly are and she’d tell the world, but I didn’t hear that part.” She looked at Cara with a question in her eyes. “I figured Travis would’ve told you.”

Cara shrugged. “When I finally finished yesterday he fed me and helped me settle enough to doze off. I awoke this morning to the alarm, but he’d set it later to give me an extra hour of sleep
,
and we didn’t have much time to talk. Is Petra still here?”

“Oh yeah, and she’s doing great work. She said something though, about Connie and you having a history? I didn’t think you knew her?”

“I don’t.” She wrinkled her brow. “Or, I don’t think I do. Even with a new last name I believe I’d remember her if I’d known her in high school or something.”

* * * *

The news didn’t break until the following Monday. Travis was awakened early that morning by a phone call and was obviously upset when he disconnected. When she asked who it’d been and what was wrong, he took several long minutes to answer.

“You know I have PR people and an assortment of lawyers on retainer to help deal with the media. That was one of them and she says the rumors are saying pictures will be published
later
today of you having sex with someone who isn’t me.”

“But I haven’t been with anyone but you! That’s impossible!” She paused, remembering the club in New York, and Paul. “Well, except the people you’ve arranged. But no one took pictures, did they?”

He pulled her into his arms, a sad expression on his face. “You were with a lot of people before you met me and it isn’t unreasonable to think one of them may’ve videoed it without your knowledge.” He sighed. “Whoever sold them shopped them around to drive the price up. The gossipmongers who know better than to cross a line with me turned them down and warned my people. Rita tells me the pictures reportedly appear to be still shots from a video. Perhaps someone taped your encounter for their private collection but now that you’re dating tabloid fodder decided to capitalize on it?”