Ryan's Crossing (6 page)

“Yes, tough. But not impossible. Especially when family and friends understand that you are trying to honor God’s Word. They’ve got lots of support and people willing to step in and chaperone as needed.”

Faye opened the front door. “Are you two going to continue to freeze on the front porch, or can I interest you in some hot chocolate?”

“Sounds good, Mom,” said Brittney.

“Got any coffee?” said Ryan.

Ryan stood back to allow Brittney to enter the house before him. He looked down at his hand, keenly aware of her touch when he had helped her up from the swing.

Peter got everyone’s attention. “I won’t take long because we all know the women have this better organized than I ever could. Amber and I just want to take this moment to thank everyone for coming out tonight and for everything I know you’ll be doing the next couple of days. Your friendship and support multiply the blessings of this weekend.

“I can’t imagine my life without any of you,” Peter paused to look around the room. “You’ve always been there to guide me, watch over me, and sometimes let me fall. But with each failure, you lovingly helped me get back up and get moving in the right direction again.”

“You done with the mushy stuff yet?” said Pops.

Ryan smiled. The old man was rough around the edges, but his love for his family was clear. And it was clear that he considered Amber family.

“Heather, it’s all yours,” said Peter, sitting down on the hearth beside Amber.

“Now don’t take too long,” said Thomas. “There’s cobbler in the kitchen!”

As Heather began listing the details of what needed to be done when and what time everyone was supposed to be at different places, Ryan looked at the people gathered in Frank and Faye’s living room. His sister was right. This family was different from any he’d been around before.

Peter, Logan, and Brittney were close as siblings, and Logan’s wife and kids enhanced the relationships. If he didn’t know better, he’d swear Micah’s son, Andy, and Andy’s wife, Allie, were part of the blood relatives somehow. And even now, watching them interact, Keith was being drawn into the mix like he belonged. Bringing an outsider into the midst of this family bonds them closer together.

Do you want to be included, great warrior?

The question took Ryan by surprise, and he wasn’t sure how to answer. Of course I want to be included, but I’m not sure I’m ready for what that means. Could I let myself be included? Rachel found her peace here as Amber; she was able to brave the risk to let people get close. Mom and Dad are definitely different. Dad’s not been bugging me about moving or spending time with them like he used to do. It’s been…nice.

Ryan was shocked at his own assessment. His parents were changing, but whether that was due to finding their long-lost daughter or this family, he wasn’t sure.

What about you, great warrior?

Ryan looked around the room. The voice was so audible, yet he was certain no one around him had said anything. And what is this ‘great warrior’ thing?

Silence.

Great. Best case, I’m talking to myself; worst case, I’m hearing voices.

“Is that okay with you, Ryan?” said Heather.

“Huh? Sorry. My mind wandered for a minute,” said Ryan.

“Can you go with Logan to pick up all the tuxes in the morning?” said Heather. “You can take care of your final fitting then.”

“Sure,” said Ryan. “Whatever you need.”

“I think that’s it,” said Heather.

“Okay,” said Andy. “Just to be sure, tomorrow we meet at the church at noon to decorate, then at five for rehearsal. Saturday morning, the girls meet at the church by noon for pictures, guys at one, and doors open to guests at 1:30.”

“Yes,” said Brittney.

“You got it,” said Allie. “Except you forgot the whole part where you turn off your phone and ignore Mrs. Guire’s calls for the next two days.”

Everyone laughed.

“Can we eat the cobbler now?” said Thomas.

“One more thing,” said Peter. He turned to Brittney, and she handed him a red jeweler’s case. “Thanks, Britt.” He turned to look at Amber. “This is for the newest Mrs. Yager to wear on her wedding day. Brittney promises it matches your dress.”

Amber opened the box and gasped, putting one hand to her mouth. “Oh, Peter. It’s beautiful.” She turned the case to show the zigzag necklace and earring set made with pearls. “Thank you.”

He took her hand in his. “You are welcome, Ray.”

“More mush,” said Pops, shaking his head. “Weddings must turn his brain soft.” He turned to Faye.“What kind of cobbler you got in there, Faye? Blackberry?”

Ryan watched Amber and Peter talking softly. She was going to be just fine.

And you, great warrior?

Chapter 9

BRITTNEY SLIPPED INTO A CLASSROOM
at the church and looked at the row of dresses hanging neatly along the coat rack on the wall. She hadn’t seen so much chiffon and satin since Logan’s wedding. She fingered the fine material and let it slip through her fingers.

“Tomorrow will be beautiful,” said Faye, walking in and hugging Brittney close.

“Yes, it will.” She paused then said, “Do you think about Jamie when we have family events like this, Mom?”

Faye sighed. “Yes. I imagine the woman she would have become, wonder how her being here would have changed the dynamic between you and your brothers.”

“Things would have been more fair growing up!”

Faye giggled. “Yes, perhaps so. The two of you could have teamed up on them—not that you normally needed a lot of help from anyone. Why do you ask?”

Brittney sighed. “I love Heather dearly, and can’t imagine life without Allie. Now Amber’s joining the family, and I’m really thankful for her. But, it’s times like this that I most wonder about Jamie.”

“Events like this would have suited her quite well.”

“She was the one who loved to dress up and have tea parties.”

Faye smiled. “Yes, she did. But then, by now she might have been married and moved to the other side of the country. You just never know.”

Brittney’s thoughts turned to Melody, the unit secretary at work who was waiting to marry her prince. He was on active duty in the military, and Brittney knew that Melody sometimes wondered if she was cut out to be an Army wife.

“Well, at least I’m not the only girl anymore. And both my brothers have found women that fit well into the family.”

“God definitely gave me a ‘Yes’ answer to my prayers about the boys’ wives.” Faye looked at Brittney, placing a hand on her cheek. “And I know God will provide you with a man whom we will love too.”

“Thanks, Mom. I’m glad you’ve prayed for him all my life.”

“Mind if I interrupt?” said Amber, stepping into the room.

“Of course not, dear,” said Faye, turning toward her.

“I just don’t know what to do with myself,” said Amber, spreading her arms wide. “Everything seems to be ready. I’ve adjusted the bows so many times they are starting to show wear, and I can tell you it’s exactly twenty-eight steps from the back door to the front altar.”

Faye laughed and wrapped her arm around Amber’s shoulders.

“Well, since we have to fit into all these dresses tomorrow, gorging on ice cream is out of the question,” said Brittney.

Amber and Faye both laughed.

“I just need to busy my mind for a while,” said Amber.

“We could go back to the house and play a game or work a puzzle… or, we could start addressing thank you cards,” said Brittney with a big smile.

“That sounds like a great time,” said Amber as she rolled her eyes.

Brittney looked at her mom. “She’s getting this sarcasm thing pretty good.”

Amber laughed.

“Come on, my girls,” said Faye. “You can decide what you want to do on the drive back to the house.”

Brittney pulled out a deck of cards and drew Logan, Heather, Victoria, Keith, and Ryan into a game with her and Amber while Faye occupied Emma and Taylor with a princess movie. The house quickly filled with laughter and sibling rivalry that had little Emma looking at them and asking Faye if everyone was “playing nice.”

“Anyone want more to drink?” asked Ryan, rising to his feet with his own empty glass.

“I’ll take some more lemonade,” said his mother.

“Me too,” said Keith.

“I just want some water,” said Amber.

“I’ll help you, Ryan,” said Brittney, pushing back from the table.

Brittney grabbed the glasses Ryan couldn’t carry and headed into the kitchen behind him.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said.” Ryan began to refill the water glasses.

“About what?” said Brittney as she sat the glasses she held on the counter.

“Career options.”

“And. . .”

“And I like the idea of forming relationships with people, but I’m not sure I’m cut out for that.”

“If you like the idea, then what’s the problem?” Brittney grabbed the lemonade out of the fridge.

“I don’t know if it will make any sense to you.”

“Try it.”

“I don’t know how much you know about our past.” Ryan grabbed the rag from the sink and began cleaning water droplets from the counter.

Brittney tried to hang back, let him share whatever he was comfortable with, but something in her yearned to know more. What keeps him running from friendships? The death of his sister sixteen years before? Amber running away ten years ago? Something else? “Amber’s told me quite a lot.”

“Well, I’ve looked at my work history and figured out that I choose to move on about the time that my partners start insisting on knowing more about me. The first few weeks, I can give them partial answers or divert the subject, and they’re fine. But after three or four months, that’s not good enough anymore.”

“Are you scared to let people in?”

Ryan shrugged. “Yeah, I guess so. Well, not scared, but… I mean, how do I know they’re dependable?” He stopped and gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head. “That’s not quite right. I know I can depend on them to get the job done, but…” Ryan clenched his jaw.

Brittney walked over and stood right in front of him. She wanted to reach out to him, to touch his arm, but settled for reaching out with her words instead. “But, what?”

“Maybe I don’t know what I’m missing, what I’m looking for.”

“I know Amber struggled with learning to depend on people, wondering if Peter and the rest of us were going to abandon her tomorrow, not knowing whether she’d be okay if something happened to one of us,” said Brittney.

She saw something flicker through his expression but wasn’t sure what to make of it. The phone rang, interrupting her concentration.

She picked up the glasses he’d refilled and started to head back to the living room. “You can choose to consider the positive side of things too, Ryan. What if your partner or whatever person who wants to know more about you is here tomorrow?”

“Hey, Britt,” said Logan. “The phone’s for you.”

“Thanks.” She put the glasses down, turned to the wall by the breakfast bar and reached for the handset.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Brittney. It’s Nicole.”

Brittney’s heart froze. She closed her eyes and forced herself to breathe. Her voice barely cooperated. “What’s up?”

“Grace is still hanging in there, but her O2 stats are a bit lower, and her heart rate’s dropped a few beats.”

“What’s she reading?”

“The O2’s been hovering around 87 today, and the heart rate keeps dipping below 80.”

“How’s her breathing?”

“It’s more steady than not, but there’s some wheezing, and at times it gets shallow or ragged.”

Brittney sighed deeply. The child’s body was slowly being deprived of oxygen. How long could it hold out?

“There’s more, Britt. The parents came in today and talked to the doctors for a while. Before they left, they signed a DNR.”

Brittney sank down onto the barstool. A Do Not Resuscitate order? Oh, Daddy. Her heart cried out to God even as her mind ran through what she knew was the medical reality. Gracie’s body could not handle much more.

She sighed deeply. “Okay. Thanks for calling.”