Running From Fate (61 page)

“Ah, but it’s no every day you ask a lassie to marry you,” Pat chimed in from his seat in front of the fire place.

Since Mira’s attack and subsequent hospitalization, a fragile truce had sprung up between James and his father.
They h
ad spent hours together in the cold waiting room, anxious
for any word on her condition.
The honest grief and worry that had been apparent on Patrick Kelly’s face had been enough to remove some of the blinders that James had worn for years, but he was still trying to adjust to the new situation.

Winston, however, was having no problems.
The two older men had become quick friends, discussing who knows what into the small hours of the night while going through James’ stock of fine whiskey.
Currently, he saw with some chagrin, they were talking about him.
He yanked at his tie, pulling it off, and tossed it on a nearby table. 
The thought of proposing marria
ge was already making him sweat.
H
e didn’t need
a
damn noose around his neck choking him as well.

“It’
s my life,” he said defensively when the men glared at him
.
“And I’ll do this the way I want to.”

“At least take the jacket,” they said in unison.
He ignored them both and walked out of the library.

His palms continued to sweat as he climbed in the car and pulled onto the road
. 
It was ridiculous to feel this queasy, he told himself.
He was 36 years old and it was about time he settled down and got married.
It was
n’t exactly
the settling down part that he really objected to.
He was done with the transience of the dating scene and he liked the idea of Mira living in his house.
It was
the institution and all that it represented that made him nervous.

It meant fully opening up and sharing himself with someone e
lse, both the good and the bad, and putting his happiness in the hands of someone else. 
He could intimidate a room full of employees,
organize and oversee complicated projects, make risky decision without blinking an eye, and
broker billion dollar deals without a sweat
, but this terrified him.
He knew, though, that it
was
what Mira wanted
—
a total commitment.  A
nd, despite
his own
misgivings, it was what she deserved.
He would just have to get used to it and,
he consoled himself as his stomach churned
, they could
go for
a long engagement.

He was so agitated that he didn’t notice the abandoned look of the house or the lack of a car in the driveway.
It was only when the doorbell went unanswered that he started to worry.
He had called the hospital early this morning and they said her friend Lily had brought her home.
He had allowed plenty
of time for them to get here.  A little too much, his inner mind taunted, because he had needed to gather his courage.  Either way,
Mira wasn’t in any shape to go out so she should have been there.

With his nervousness slowly being replaced by concern, he pulled out the key Mira had given him and opened the door.
The first thing he saw w
as the picture.
It was finished, with
both knight and dragon filled in to the last detail,
and
so lifelike the characters
almost seemed to jump
off the paper.
It sat framed
in simple wood
, leaning against the sofa.
Propped in front of it was a letter.
He walked forward and
picked it up.
The not
e
said simply
that Mira needed a break from things and had gone away to figure out what she wanted to do.
The
pict
ure, apparently, was to be his.

His heart plummeted.  Like a drowning man, he grasped onto the idea that she had not gone willingly.  Somehow her friend, Lily, must have coerced or forced her.  He snatched up the picture and ran out the door.  Ten minutes later he had his answer.  She had not been pressured or intimida
te.  S
he had left of her own volition.  In fact, she had even stopped and asked the neighbors to keep an eye on the place until another renter was found.

If she wante
d time, he thought angrily,
she could damn well have it.
With a jerky motion he opened his car door and set the picture in the back seat before climbing in.
Tires squealed as he revved the engine and peeled away.

James sat at his desk and silently contemplated the latest investigative report that lay in front of him.  Since Mira had left almost two months ago there had been no trace of her.  At first he had wallowed in his anger, using it to push him and get him through the series of empty days and nights.  When his rage had finally lessened he realized that he had alienated his faithful butler, disgusted his father, and made silent phantoms of his employees.

He had been like a ghost himself for almost a week, drifting quietly through his own life as the hurt he had suppressed overwhelmed him.  His father had been the one to snap, pushing him to face his own responsibility, telling him to take control and go after her.  Galvanized, he had tri
ed, but come up against a wall.  T
h
ere was no sign of her
and short of physically threatening Lily, which Devon would object to, he had not been able to get her to talk
. 
It was time, he decided, to call in a favor.  Devon knew some people.  If the FBI couldn’t find her, no one could.  He picked up the phone.

“
Mr. Kelly?”

James looked up to see Mrs. Beecham standing in his doorway.  Her expression was downcast, steeped in sympathy
. 
“What is it?” he asked brusquely, annoyed by the interruption.

She walked forward and stretched her arm out, passing him an envelope.  “This came for you.”

**********************************************
************

“Will you please stop
your
pacing, Mira?
It’s making me feel dizzy just watching you.”

“Well then you shouldn’t watch me.”
Mira briefly stopped her circuitous route around the large, dark paneled living room and looked at Sarah.
Her frie
nd certainly didn’t look faint.  S
he looked complacent and
comfortable as she lounged
in the deep brown armchair with her feet on a matching footstool.

Despite the fact that she was heavily pregnant and her once petite feet were swollen to twice their size, she looked happy and glowing
and, despite her advanced pregnancy, beautiful with her soulful brown eyes, lush body and long, silky black hair
.
That’s what it was like, she thought
despondently
, when you were sure of your partner
’
s love and trust.

Mira
blew out a
breath and flopped
down in the matching armchair,
fe
eling
guilty and lowered to be experiencing such jealousy toward one of her best friends, especially when there was no one more deservin
g of such love and devotion than
Sarah
.
It was difficult to control though when, with each passing day, she grew less certain that James would ever return her feelings.
It had been nearly
two months and she hadn’t heard anything from him, not even a letter.

“This isn’t working Sarah,” she said forlornly.

“How is it not working?” her friend replied.
“Your nightmares seem to be gone and you’ve started drawing again.
And you don’t even have to go back to work
at EcoSpace
unless you want to since you have a buyer for some of your pieces and
a
job offer that would allow you to draw for a living
.”

“I do draw for a living.
Considering that I’m an architectural designer I spend a lot of time drawing things.”

“You know what I’
m talking about
,” Sarah huffed.
“A
nd I can’t understand why you haven’t jumped at the chance and already sent in your resignation.
”

“I did,” Mira said softly, “but,” she continued before Sarah could interrupt.
“I won’t be taking the offer.
Drawing fantasy pictures for video games is still just a job.
I wouldn’t really have any control over what I create.”

“
And yet you still felt the need to quit
your job?
You were so exited about working for a company on the leading edge of sustainable, eco-friendly building.
Will it really be so difficult
to continue
?
”

Mira sank lower in her chair and leaned her head back.
“I can’t do it.
It would be too painful to see him every day and know that I can never really have him.”

“Oh sweetie
I’m so sorry.”
True to her gentle nature, Sarah pushed herself up and slowly started toward Mira.
Before she had even crossed half the space her husband,
Pete, barreled into the room and scooped her up.
Even with her increased girth, she looked tiny an
d delicate in the big man’s muscled arms
.

Despite the fact that he was a successful, educated business man, who specialized in raising expensive thoroughbred horses, Pete still looked like a lumberjack or a mountain man, complete with a head of bright red hair and a full beard.
You could tell, however, by the way that he touched and looked at his wife that he believed he was the luckiest man alive.

After asking Mira to move to the sofa and gently depositing Sarah next to her, he turned around and quietly left the room, leaving them to talk in privacy.

When they were alone, Sarah tried to reach over and pull her into a comforting hug, but her stomach got in the way.
Instead, she settl
ed for keeping an arm around Mira’s
shoulders and leaning into her side.
“Are you sure there’s no chance?” she
asked
quietly.

“It’s been too long.
If he had really felt anything for me he would have done something before now.
There hasn’t even been a phone call.
”