Rotten Apple (6 page)

“Sure, Apple. See you later,” Zen said.

Happy and Apple walked down the hallway to their class, Happy still holding onto Apple’s arm.

“Apple, did you notice anything different about Zen?” Happy asked.

“Different? What do you mean?” asked Apple, pretending she had no clue what Happy was getting at but feeling herself, again, turning pink at the very sound of his name.

“Oh my God. Are you blind? He looks amazing! I never noticed how good-looking he was. Who knew? You get some contact lenses and a surfer body and a
tan, and, poof, six months later you’re hot. Man, he’s even hotter than that lifeguard,” Happy said.

“I don’t know,” Apple answered. They walked into the classroom and took seats next to each other. “I mean, I thought he looked kind of cute before, with his glasses. They made him look smart.”

“Smart, schmart. Zen is hotter now than Hopper. I think he may even have a better body,” Happy said dreamily.

Apple couldn’t help but think about how she had only a few more hours to talk to Zen today. She had only a few more hours to get Plan Z into action.

And she couldn’t believe how slowly her classes were going by. Finally, the lunchtime bell went off. Apple felt her stomach lurch. She wasn’t sure if it was hunger pangs. She knew the knot in her stomach probably had more to do with the thought of trying to talk to Zen again. I am just so bad at this, she thought.

She headed to the cafeteria. You are the daughter of Dr. Bee Bee Berg, thought Apple. For God’s sake, you can do this. You
know
what to do. You read the damn book!

“Hey, Brooklyn,” Apple said to her friend, who was opening a plastic container full of mung beans. Brooklyn didn’t eat anything that had once had a face. She always had some sort of Tupperware container full of organic healthy fare, usually some sort of bean salad, which meant her lunches often smelled like feet. “Where’s Happy?”

“She just went to the washroom. She’ll be back in a sec. Doesn’t being back at school suck? It’s almost like
we didn’t have a break at all,” Brooklyn moaned, putting aside her smelly lunch and lying back dramatically on the bench.

“I know. I feel all tense again,” Apple admitted, not exactly telling the truth about why she was tense. “God, how can you eat that stuff?” she asked Brooklyn with a hint of disgust, and then moved the beans a little farther away from her.

“I don’t know. I like it. It’s good for you. Why are you so tense?” Brooklyn asked. “What’s up?”

“Oh, nothing,” Apple answered.

“You should really think about taking up yoga,” Brooklyn advised her friend. “It’s the only thing that puts my body and mind at peace. Sometimes you just need to connect your mind and your heart and all will be good.”

But Apple wasn’t listening. Zen had walked into the cafeteria and was about to walk by their table. Now is your chance, Apple, she thought.

“Hey, Zen,” Apple called out as he came closer.

“Oh, hi, Apple. Hi, Brooklyn,” Zen said.

“Do you want to sit with us?” Brooklyn asked.

“Yes, there’s room here,” Apple added. Or she thought she did. She wasn’t sure if the words had come out at all.

“Oh, I can’t. I promised Hopper I’d meet him out back and shoot some hoops with him.”

“Oh, you like basketball?” Apple asked, remembering the tip to try to keep him talking about something he was interested in.

“Yeah, sure. I’m
addicted
to basketball.”

“I like basketball too,” Apple said.

She ignored Brooklyn, but she saw her out of the corner of her eye, looking at her as if she had gone mad. Brooklyn knew she hated all sports.

“Really. Who’s your favorite team?” Zen asked.

“Um, the guys who wear the green jerseys?” Apple said. There must be a team with green jerseys, Apple prayed.

“Oh, those guys,” laughed Zen. “Yeah, they’re my favorite team too. Well, I’d better go. Hopper is waiting for me. See you guys later.”

“Say ‘hi’ to Hopper for me,” Brooklyn called out.

Apple watched as Zen walked off. She felt stupid and deflated. Maybe she should have been reading her mother’s other book,
Mistakes Not to Make, by the Queen of Hearts
.

“Have you noticed how good Zen looks?” Brooklyn asked sincerely. “It’s like he’s a whole new person. Did he get plastic surgery or something?” Not you too, Apple groaned inwardly.

“Sure, Brooklyn. How many fifteen-year-old boys do you know who get plastic surgery?” Apple scoffed.

“Who got plastic surgery?” Happy asked, sitting down beside them.

“I was just saying to Apple that I think Zen got plastic surgery or something. He looks so good,” Brooklyn said.

“I know!” Happy exclaimed. “I was just saying that this morning. I think he’s as good-looking as Hopper now.”

“Well, I don’t know about
that
,” Brooklyn responded, and her friends looked at her. “Hey! Hopper will always be a walking Calvin Klein underwear ad. Everyone knows that! So don’t look at me like
that. But Zen is definitely in the game now, I’d say. Don’t you think so, Apple?” Brooklyn asked.

“I guess so,” Apple said, thinking, I
absolutely freaking
think so.

“So are we coming over to your house after school today, Apple, to watch
Queen of Hearts?
Is it the Sperm Bandit show?” Happy asked, mercifully changing the subject.

“I’m not sure. I think it may be the Torn between Two Lovers show,” said Apple.

“Whatever. I can’t wait to watch whatever it is,” said Happy.

“Why do we have to go to
my
house?” Apple asked. “Why can’t we go to yours, or Brooklyn’s?”

“You want to come to my house?
My
house?” Brooklyn asked. “With the Helicopter hovering around, making sure we don’t spill anything, telling us that we should be spending our time doing homework instead of watching trashy television? I don’t think so!”

“The Helicopter thinks my mother’s show is trashy?” Apple asked, perking up.

“Don’t get too excited, Apple. The Helicopter thinks
every
show on television is trashy. She even thinks the news is trashy.”

“Well, we can’t go to
my
house,” Happy said. “My sister will be there. And you know what Sailor is like. She’s a pain in the ass and will probably be blasting her music or talking on the phone nonstop. Her mere presence will annoy us, trust me. Plus, no one will be home at your house, Apple. We’re going to your house,”
she decided. “Besides, Guy might be there, and I need him to see I’m television-worthy.”

“Well,
I
don’t think Guy will be there,” Apple said, as the bell rang to signal the end of lunch. “He’ll be at the show. But Aunt Hazel might be there. You never know.”

“Oh, I love Aunt Hazel!” Happy cried. “She’s just as much a character as Guy. God, Apple, your house is always so exciting. It’s
fantastic
.”

If only Happy really knew what went on, thought Apple.

“Fine, we’ll go to my house,” Apple said. “But I can’t promise that I’m going to watch the show with you.”

“Oh, you know you will,” Happy called out cheerfully.

After her last class, Apple headed to the front doors to meet up with Brooklyn and Happy.

Except it was not Brooklyn and Happy who were at the front doors. It was Happy and Zen, who were talking animatedly about something. Apple stopped dead before she got there, and then watched them laughing. She wondered what they were laughing about and immediately felt left out. She was shocked to find herself feeling this way. She hadn’t even managed to get more than two sentences out of Zen today, let alone make him laugh like that. Apple felt sick to her stomach. Why couldn’t she be more like Happy? Happy may idolize her mother, but Apple idolized Happy. Happy made everything she did seem effortless.

Apple took a deep breath and walked up to them. “Hey, guys,” she said. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”

“There you are!” said Happy. “I thought you were going to bail. Zen was just telling me this hilarious story about the surfing lessons he took in Australia with a former champion.” Happy turned her attention fully back to Zen. “I’ve always wanted to learn how to surf.”

“You know,” Zen said, speaking directly to Happy, “it’s not as hard as you think. I bet you’d be pretty good at it.”

“Well, I guess I’ll have to put it on my list of 101 Things I Must Do Before I Die,” Happy laughed, tossing her long blond hair over her shoulder and sticking her chest out a little.

“Yeah, I’d like to try surfing too,” Apple said, trying to get into the conversation. She felt like a third wheel. She felt jealous, too. But why should she be feeling jealous? They were just talking.

“You should too,” said Zen, not even glancing at Apple.

“I should,” said Apple. And there was an uncomfortable silence. Happy and Zen were just
staring
at each other.

“Happy, we should go, if you want to make it to my house in time,” Apple finally said.

“In time for what?” Zen asked. It bothered Apple that Zen was
still
looking only at Happy when he asked her that.

“Oh—we’re going to Apple’s house to watch her mother’s show,” Happy said.

“Ah,
The Queen of Hearts with Dr. Bee Bee Berg
. A must-not-miss, right?” Zen asked.

“Right!” said Happy excitedly. “I worship her! Do you watch it?”

“Can’t say that I do,” Zen answered. “Sorry, Apple.”

“Oh, I couldn’t care less,” Apple said, trying to sound cool. “Where’s Brooklyn?” she asked Happy.

“She bailed. She called to tell her mother she was going to your house, and her mother forced her to come home and help her grocery shop,” Happy said, with a roll of her eyes.

“Well, we’d better go, Happy, if you don’t want to miss the show,” Apple said, trying to move things along.

“See you tomorrow, Zen? You’ll have to tell me more about surfing.” Happy flashed her perfect smile and wrapped her long blond hair around her fingers.

“Sure thing, Happy. Can’t wait. See you tomorrow,” Zen said, waving goodbye.

Hello? I’m standing right here, thought Apple, as Zen walked away. She made a mental note to search for “surfing” and “basketball” on the Internet later that night, so she too could have something to talk about with Zen. If Happy could do it, so could she. Plan Z wasn’t dead yet.

pple and Happy plopped themselves on the couch at Apple’s house, sinking into the overstuffed pillows and putting their feet up on the coffee table. Happy grabbed the remote control and clicked the big flat-screen television on, just as the theme song of
Queen of Hearts with Dr. Bee Bee Berg
began. She hummed along.

“I can’t believe you’re making me watch this,” Apple muttered, slouching deeper into the couch.

“Hey, no one is holding a gun to your head. Why are you in such a bad mood, anyway?” asked Happy.

“I guess just being back at school and everything. I’m just tired,” Apple explained. “I didn’t sleep very well last night. I’m cranky.”

Apple didn’t want to admit that she was a little mad at her friend. Not that she wanted to be. Not that she even knew why exactly she was angry.

“I thought you couldn’t wait for break to end so your mother would get back to work and you could
see us again. And now here we are, watching her working. You should be thrilled. You should be—Oh, shhh. The show is starting,” Happy said, leaning closer to the television.

Apple only half paid attention to her mother, who was introducing a woman named Cybil who was in love with two men at the same time. Apparently, Cybil was engaged to be married to Dave when she met Mark, who she feels may or may not be her soulmate. As her mother’s voice asking, “Do you want my advice?” buzzed in the background, Apple’s mind wandered. She envisioned a good conversation with Zen and wondered how she would go about getting to the next step of Plan Z—the step of getting him to want to hang out with her.

“After the break,” she heard her mother say, “we’ll hear from Mark and Dave how they feel about sharing the same woman.”

There was a shot of the audience clapping and then it went to a commercial.

“Okay, we can talk now,” said Happy, “at least until the commercial break is over. You know, I really believe you can be in love with two people at the same time. I feel bad for Cybil.”

“I feel bad for Mark and Dave,” Apple answered. “What kind of woman gets herself into that kind of mess? Isn’t she embarrassed at all? Aren’t they all embarrassed to share this story? I feel bad for all of them. It’s just so personal to be sharing with so many people.”

“You want to know something personal about me?” Happy asked Apple. “I think I may have a little crush myself.”

“What?” Apple said, sitting up to attention. “On who?”

Apple felt her heart sink. She suspected what was coming next. She knew Happy well enough. She knew what she’d seen after school. Happy tossing her hair behind her shoulder. Happy sticking out her chest a little.

“I knew that would get your attention. I don’t know. I think I might like Zen,” Happy said.

“
Like
him, like him?” Apple asked, gulping. She was trying to act calm even though she felt anything but.

“Apple, you have to swear not to say anything. Promise!” Happy said. “Except to Brooklyn. But that’s all!”

“When did this happen?” Apple said, trying not to sound as shocked as she was feeling. “You never even knew he existed before today. You only talked to him for, like, five minutes after school.”

“Well, sometimes that’s all it takes. If you have chemistry, you have chemistry, as your mother just said. And it’s not true that I never knew he existed. Of course I knew he existed. We’ve all been going to school together forever. We’ve all known each other for years,” Happy said defensively.

“You know what I mean,” Apple said. “You’ve never really talked to him before, that’s all I’m saying.”

“Well, I did today. And he’s really interesting. I mean, he just spent months in Australia surfing! I would love to do that. And then seeing him looking so different, and then actually talking to him, made me see him in a whole new light. I never knew he was so funny and so cool. And he’s sweet too.” Happy was practically gushing.

This cannot be happening, Apple thought. Her best friend—make that her best friend who always looked like she just walked out of the pages of a fashion magazine—could
not
have a crush on her Zen at the same time she did.

It will be okay, Apple tried to reason to herself. This is
Happy
we’re talking about—Happy who has flings with lifeguards whose last names she doesn’t even know. This was just Happy being carefree, friendly, and flirtatious.

She couldn’t possibly really be “in like” with Zen so suddenly. Even if she was, her feelings could be gone by tomorrow.

Happy was still chattering on.

“Do you think it’s strange that I like him? You can tell me the truth, Apple. What do you think?” she asked.

“No, it’s just that, well, you just got out of a relationship with that lifeguard, right? Maybe you’re just feeling like you need someone to fill that void.” Apple could hear her mother’s voice in her own.

“I told you! That was just a fling! It didn’t mean anything. Zen is different. He’s really—Okay, shh, the show is starting again. I need to know who Cybil will choose—Dave or Mark.”

Happy had gone back to immersing herself in the love lives of others.

Apple, on the other hand, had completely stopped paying attention to the show. Her mind was on what Happy had just told her. Happy may like Zen. Happy may be into Zen.

She was so wrapped up in this thought that she didn’t even notice that
Queen of Hearts
had ended and the credits were rolling.

“Can you believe she chose Dave? But I guess it’s like your mother said—you choose the one you know treats
their
mother well. And you could just tell Dave was the type of guy who treats his mother well.” Happy chatted away. “Crap. I think that’s Sailor honking out front. I told her to come get me at six after she finished her dance class. Thanks for letting me watch, Apple. I’ll see you tomorrow. And remember—do not say a word to anyone about what I told you about Zen! It may be nothing. But it sure does make going to school a little more interesting.” Happy blew Apple a kiss goodbye and headed out the door.

Apple could only hope that this was true, that it was nothing. Zen was
her
reason to look forward to school. She didn’t want to share that with anyone, not even Happy.

Apple headed to her room. She needed to compose herself. She needed to think. And she knew that the only way to make herself feel better was to write to ED. Writing in her private journal was the one time she felt she could collect her thoughts. It was her therapy. Just like some people liked to talk out their problems, Apple liked to write. Sitting down at her desk, Apple saw the “on” button was already lit up.

That’s weird, Apple thought. Why is my computer already on? She could have sworn that she had turned it off after writing to ED that morning before going to school. She touched her mouse pad and up came her
most recent ED entry, the one about her being nervous to go to school and about Plan Z and about reading her mother’s book. There’s no way I didn’t shut this down, she thought. There’s no way! Apple always made a point of turning off her computer. She started to bite her fingernails, frowning, while looking at the screen.

There was only one reason Apple could think of that her computer would be on. My mother, my damn nosy, snooping mother, she thought. How dare she!

Did her mother have no boundaries? Dr. Bee Bee Berg is the worst mother in the world, Apple thought, slamming her laptop shut. She was no longer even in the mood to write to ED. First her best friend had disappointed her, and now her mother. This day sucked. She tried to think like Brooklyn. “The future doesn’t matter, the past doesn’t matter. It’s all about the present. Think positive thoughts and the world will respond positively back.”

It was sort of right, thought Apple. I can’t control the past and the fact I never could get up the nerve to talk to Zen. I can’t control the future and seeing if Happy goes through with liking Zen. Right now, I’m going to concentrate on my homework. Apple picked up her knapsack and rummaged through her bag. She saw her mother’s book and, rolling her eyes, threw it across her room so it hit the wall. She walked over to pick it up. Then she threw it in the trash.