Ross 02 Rock Me (9 page)
Authors: Cherrie Lynn
“Sweetheart,” he murmured. Then he did what she had been fantasizing about from the moment he’d touched her: he slid his hand farther along her cheek, into her hair. Past her ear. Until his fingers threaded deep and tight into her locks and he palmed the back of her head, bringing her closer until their lips hovered a breath away from each other.
She made a whimpering sound she hated herself for, and his other hand came up to smooth her hair away from her face. Trapped against him like this, she was powerless. Consumed by him. His breath on her
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lips, his scent filling her nostrils. The warmth of his hands and his lean body against her. But it was the hard column of his erection pressing into her abdomen that left her in ashes. He wanted her. It was all the evidence she needed, all the encouragement. She transferred all her weight to her tiptoes, the subtle movement all it took to fit her lips against his. Her heart leapt for joy with the simple, soft contact, and she reveled in the silky scratch of his goatee. The brush of his warm, dry lips opening against hers. But it felt too tentative, too cautious. It wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted to-hellwith-the-world passion. She wanted him to feel all the things she was feeling, the delight and the terror. How could she break the dam?
She meant to lift her arms to put them around his neck, but where they went was under his shirt, to the hot, hard flesh beneath. His muscles tensed beneath her touch and, taking that as a good sign, she didn’t retreat but explored further. Tracing the ridges of a six-pack and well-defined pecs. He stiffened and moaned as her fingers passed delicately over the circlets of his nipple rings, and that was all it took. The hand at the back of her head fisted in her hair and she had the crazy thought that this was a Jekyll and Hyde kiss. Demure and passive one minute. Monstrous the next. His mouth claimed hers in a burning rush, and she bent back beneath the onslaught, buffeted by sensations that had her gasping against him every time she could come up for air. His tongue invaded her mouth and coaxed hers into a sinuous dance behind her teeth.
She pulled her hands away to clutch fistfuls of his T-shirt and wrenched it upward, desperate to finally bare his flesh to her sight. “Take this off,” she pleaded against his mouth. He broke the kiss to peel off his shirt in one fluid motion, tossing it on the couch as she marveled at the TV-lit expanse of skin he revealed. It would take hours to lie down and inspect the detailed markings on his arms. She would love to have that kind of time with him.
Smoothing her hands over his skin, she wondered if he noticed how they trembled. When she dared a glance at his face, his eyes were closed, his head tilted back. The star on his left pectoral was a beacon for her lips, and she leaned forward and brushed it delicately.
His hand clenched again in her hair and the hard line of his jaw rubbed over the top of her head. She flickered her tongue across his skin, savoring his answering groan. The rush of power was heady and intoxicating, and she gasped when he pulled her head back by her hair to brand her lips again with his.
Oh…
Jesus. She’d been kissed before, but never like this. There had been the guy who tried to swab her tonsils and the guy who seemed to be trying to draw blood with his teeth and the guy who did it just right, but didn’t make her feel…this. Brian’s taste invaded her mouth, sensuous and dark and everything she had ever imagined. No, it was more. His tongue touched and teased hers until she melted away and leaned her knees into his in an effort to remain standing. The liquid ache between her thighs had drained all strength from the waist down. She needed him to catch her before she fell. She was sliding…
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His arms swept down around her waist, strong and solid. “I got you,” he murmured, one hand sweeping down to cup her ass and lift her against him. She took the welcome opportunity to wrap her legs around him, grinding her crotch against his erection. It felt huge. Oh, holy hell.
“Where?” he whispered, still sliding his lips over hers, scrambling her thoughts, and her trembling redoubled.
She managed to nod toward her bedroom door. He carried her through it, and she suddenly, frantically worried that it was a mess in there: bed unmade, clothes flung over chairs, books stacked precariously on her nightstand. At least it was dark, the only light filtering in from the living room. Why in the hell hadn’t she had the foresight to tidy up?
Because she hadn’t expected this. Still, surely it had always been
somewhat
within the realm of possibility. Here he was now, about to make love to her.
Her heart twisted up as she realized she was romanticizing this. Brian wasn’t a “make love” kind of guy. Brian was going to fuck her, and then he would be gone. It was evident in the way he flung her down, causing her waterbed to slosh, evident in the almost feral glint the distant light cast in his eyes. She couldn’t keep her breath steady. It was as erratic as her thundering heart rate. Desperate to match him, she swept her shirt off over her head and reached for him, craving the feel of his bare flesh against hers. He dropped to the bed and went into her arms, pausing only to grab her battered old teddy bear from underneath him and give it a fling across the room. She could imagine him doing the same thing to her heart.
Sliding her arms around his back, she arched against him as his lips trailed down her throat to her breast. She wanted his mouth there, where she felt so hot and heavy, straining against her white cotton bra. Dammit, couldn’t she have at least worn something sexy? Something silky and lacy? She was no freaking good at this. She could’ve taken the damn thing off after her shirt, but she hadn’t had the courage. Brian hooked one finger under the fabric and tugged it slowly down, her nipple slipping free and immediately into his mouth. A moan ripped itself from her throat at the shocking sensation, warm and wet and drawing contractions from between her legs. His knee slid between hers, and she gripped it tight with her thighs.
“Oh, God,” she whispered shakily as he sucked her, gently tugging her nipple between his teeth. The weight of her breast trapped the fabric of her bra beneath it and he moved his hand, caressing her bare belly with the back of his knuckles. Her muscles pulled so tight they trembled beneath the feather-light brush. His dark head lifted, and his gaze roamed her face. “Okay?” he asked, and she nodded and tilted her hips toward him, wanting those fingers to go where she needed them, where she’d wanted them ever since she was stretched out on that table under his needle. Down, down…
She sank her teeth into her bottom lip as he unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans, resuming those delectable ministrations at her breast until she was ready to shed bra, jeans, panties, wrap herself around
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him and not let go. The tips of his fingers slid over the silk of her panties, and her legs fell apart, allowing him, needing him, to go wherever he wanted.
The sound he made then, a slow hiss of air through his teeth, was off-the-freaking-charts erotic. Her cheeks flamed. Along with other, more needy parts of her body. His hand cupped her, his wrist caught between her belly and the denim she wore. His fingers pressed into her cleft, barred from her flesh only by a damp scrap of fabric. She squirmed, needing more, aching for him to slide it aside and plunge into her.
“Hold on, baby,” he murmured.
Oh, but she couldn’t. She was in flames, undulating against his hand, frustrated when he eluded her.
“Please, Brian.
Please
.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear.”
Damn him for making her beg, for—
All those thoughts fled when he moved aside the thin panel of fabric between her legs and explored her wetness, caressing her sensitive folds with unbearable gentleness. The sensations he had evoked were too acute; she couldn’t think straight. She was wound too tight, clinging to him and panting into his shoulder while he took his dear, sweet time winding her even tighter. When he finally pushed deeper, parting her labia and seeking her entrance, she struggled to spread wider for him. His fingertip sought and breached her, and she gasped as it burned through her passage. A whimper escaped her before she could suppress it, and Brian growled low in his throat. “So tight.”
She winced and adjusted as he pushed deeper. She wanted to struggle out of her jeans, but at the same time there was a delicious wantonness in lying here with his hand shoved down her pants and her panties pushed aside while he stroked her depths.
“Up here, baby,” he murmured, and she tilted her face up for his kiss, tasting his heat, his lust, as he teased her lips apart with his and then devastated her with the mastery of his tongue as it plundered deep. He dragged his finger out of her, swirled it over her too-sensitive clitoris in the exact same pattern his tongue danced in her mouth. She tensed and shuddered and tried to wriggle away, but only half-heartedly. Brian smiled wickedly against her lips. “What’s the matter?”
“Feels…
oh
. It feels too good.”
“Then you’d better stay right here,” he murmured, lips skimming over hers. Two blunt fingertips trailed down and pressed into her opening. Her mouth fell open against his, but when he tried to penetrate, she couldn’t control her reaction. She gasped and dug her heels into the bed to fight against the shocking pressure, but her jeans kept his hand trapped there.
“Shh, shh,” he said, immediately withdrawing once he realized she had gone from agonized pleasure into real distress. “Jesus, Candace. Please tell me you’ve done this before.”
Tears pricked behind her eyes as he looked down at her. The words gathered behind her mouth, she just couldn’t force them out.
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Her silence must have been answer enough. Brian smoothed the hair away from her forehead, brushing her brow with his lips. “Oh, baby. Never?”
“I think I’d remember.” Her voice sounded tiny even to her own ears.
“I know that, but…” He exhaled shakily. “Damn.”
“Does it really matter that much?”
“Hell yes, it matters. Obviously. Were you not going to tell me? I could’ve really hurt you.”
She swallowed thickly. “Are you mad at me?”
“Not at all.” He shook his head, his face close enough to hers that the tip of his nose almost brushed her own. Then he laughed, a little self-deprecatingly. “I just don’t know what to do with you now.”
“What do you mean? Do what you would ordinarily do.”
His thumb continued stroking her hairline. “I can’t be the one you want to give it up to your first time.”
What the hell?
“I’m only lying here with my legs open for you.” There. That was better, that icy, steely tinge in her voice. His questioning her judgment this way was not cool in the least. “What you did…I wasn’t prepared for what it would feel like, but I don’t want you to stop now.”
He shook his head again. She wished he would quit doing that. “Honey, it’s not that I don’t want you, because I’m about to explode here. I want to bury myself so deep inside you, you’ll think you won’t ever get me out.”
Ohhh
.
“But I can’t let myself do that to you. I can’t.”
Given the determination he managed to inject into those last two words, she knew no amount of arguing would change his mind. But she’d come this far and she couldn’t let go of him without some answers.
“Not tonight, or not ever?”
His voice was tight. “Candace.”
“You said you want me. I want you too. Is that not enough?”
“You make me feel too…” He trailed off, staring at her. She lifted her hand and stroked his cheek.
“Feel too what?”
“I don’t deserve this.”
Her heart broke. She’d never taken Brian for a guy who suffered from lack of confidence. He’d always been so vibrant and sure of himself. Why would he begin to have doubts about his self-worth here in her arms? Surely nothing she’d ever said or done led him to believe she didn’t think he was good enough for her.
“It’s not about deserving,” she said softly.
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“You’re probably right, but it’s the easiest way I can sum up the situation. I can’t be who you need me to be.”
“I only need you to be you.”
“No. You need more, you need better than me. You’re everything that’s beautiful and innocent, and just looking at you this way makes me feel like a filthy, debauching bastard.” She opened her mouth to protest there was no reason he should feel that way, but he laid a silencing finger on her lips. “At the same time, it makes me want you more than anything else in my life.”
She kissed his fingertip, opened her mouth to let it slip between her lips, her teeth. He shuddered against her, groaning when she sucked gently on it, drawing it deeper. His erection ground against her thigh, sending a thrill through her stomach. Until he abruptly pulled away from her. “Christ, Candace.”
Damn him. What did she have to do? Who did she have to be?
“You know,” she said, “I’ll never be able to get filthy and debauched with you until you let me get a little bit dirty.” She hated herself for the way her voice broke at the end, and for the tear that slipped from the corner of her eye. Maybe he couldn’t see it.
No such luck. He wiped it away, staring down at her with an appraisal that made her feel stripped way more naked than she was.
“We could take it slow,” she said, thinking it incredible and maybe slightly pathetic that she was having to talk him into this. Wasn’t it supposed to be the other way around? “I liked it when you touched me. A lot. I wanted more. I think I just needed you to take more time.”
“The things I’d like to do to you,” he murmured darkly, lowering his lips to the hollow of her throat.
“Do some of them,” she whispered, shivering. “Or just one. Do one thing. Please?”
When he lifted his head, she could hardly see his expression in the near darkness, but she had the sense he was debating whether staying was a good idea. She was debating it herself. If he didn’t want her, why torture herself by making these memories? At least before, he’d only been a fantasy. Now she knew what he tasted like. What he felt like. She knew the scent and warmth of his skin and the feel of him touching her more intimately than she’d ever allowed anyone else. But the words were out there, and she wouldn’t take them back. She couldn’t have let go of him if the building caught on fire.
“Take this off,” he murmured, urging her up and reaching behind her. A brush of his fingers against her back, a momentary tightening of her bra, and then it loosened, undone. She bit her lip as the straps fell down her arms, and then the cups when he tugged them away. He’d just seen her moments ago. Still, she wanted to cover herself, afraid he would find some flaw that would turn him off. She forced herself to lie back and not give in to such a virginal impulse. He was being skittish enough about this and she was actually afraid of scaring
him
away.
His gaze moved over her as gently as the fingertip that stroked the side swell of her breast. Her nipples tightened agonizingly for that touch, so close and yet too far away. She closed her eyes when he 52
Rock Me
moved his hand away, traveling down, farther and farther, until he grasped the gaping waistband of her jeans.
“And let’s lose these.” She lifted her hips from the bed to help him, feeling the rough denim slide down her buttocks, her thighs. In a moment of heart-stopping shock, she realized her panties had gone with it. The air from the ceiling fan swirled over her naked thighs, then her shins, and finally her feet as he flung the garments to the floor. She shivered though she was burning up inside. Brian surveyed every square inch of her in the near-dark, as if committing it all to memory. His hand closed on her ankle and moved up her leg inch by inch. Thank God she’d shaved. “You’re so beautiful, sunshine.”
He shouldn’t do that. Not now. She didn’t want to lose it completely. “You can’t see me well enough.”
“I can.” His hand roamed higher, to the crook of her knee. His fingertips skimmed behind it, and she drew in a breath as he grazed that soft skin that was so seldom touched. “And I can feel you.”
A whimper escaped her. “I want to see you, too,” she said.
“You will.”
Finally, he lowered himself over her and grazed her lips with his. She couldn’t help herself, her arms went around him and she cradled him between her legs. He was hard everywhere she touched him, from his hips holding her thighs apart to his smooth, firm back muscles beneath her hands to his chest pressing against her breasts. The thick ridge beneath his jeans rubbing against her clitoris with every one of his movements…oh, Lord help her, that was the hardest part of all. How would that feel thrusting into her? She thought of the way his fingers had singed her. That feeling magnified? She wouldn’t survive it. He kissed her gently, teasingly. His entire demeanor had changed since her revelation. It was all the more heartbreaking for her. Their tongues danced around each other, and it was so sweet she wanted to cry. Not just these stray tears, but really let the dam burst. It was everything she’d ever dreamed of since she first decided boys were something that might be of interest to her, and she couldn’t have it, not like she wanted.
Brian’s hands found hers, his fingers intertwining with her own. “I could lie here and kiss you all night,” he murmured against her lips. That sounded nice to her. She realized that their bodies had involuntarily begun to move with each other in a semblance of lovemaking, spurred on by the natural motions of the water mattress beneath them. She thought the easy, fluid rocking alone was going to make her climax. Heat permeated her lower belly, spreading languorously throughout the rest of her. This wasn’t enough. She needed his hands on her. His mouth. As if reading her mind, he eased down her body, still keeping her hands pinned in place, to tease first one nipple and then the other with his tongue. His hair fell forward, long enough to tickle her skin, and she writhed on the bed helplessly, bringing her knee up to press her groin tighter to his. That mouth of his would be the death of her. Hot as
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fire and unspeakably skillful. When it began to travel down her stomach, kissing a slow, damp trail, panic flared through her even as she wanted to purr in ecstasy. Oh, yes yes yes…
He let her hands go, moving his own down to keep her legs splayed wide. She was near sobbing now, especially when he stopped and lifted his head, apparently admiring his handiwork as he stared at her tattoo. “When I told you to be creative if the lucky guy came along, I never in a million years thought it would be me.”
“Me either,” she whispered. “But I wanted it to be.” When he lowered his head and nuzzled between her thighs, she reached frantically to grab his hair—not wanting to stop him, but what else was she supposed to do? “Brian!”
“Shhhh.” Warm wetness slicked over her clit. She nearly came undone, clenching up all over, gasping in shock. He chuckled softly and she felt the breath of it on her enflamed flesh. “Never?”
“Never.”
He groaned, the vibrations of it soaking into her, causing her legs to jerk in his hands. “Hang in there, I’m nowhere near done yet. And just a warning: when you come, I’m giving you two fingers. You’ll need them.”
Unable to form words, she merely gave a soft cry.
“I won’t hurt you.” Beneath the gentle kisses and licks he was bestowing on her pussy, she felt his fingers stroke her entrance. Not penetrating, but letting her know they were there. Ready and waiting. Oh, but he didn’t play fair. He built her to orgasm so hard and fast she didn’t have time to prepare. Or maybe she’d been on the cusp already. She only knew everything that had been accumulating inside of her over the past week all converged at once, and flew out of her as soon as he closed his lips on her clit and sucked. There was no resisting it. She went into a million pieces and every one of them screamed his name. So many nights she’d lain here and listened to the couple next door bang the walls and raise the roof getting it on; now they could probably hear her. Brian took the moment a contraction wrenched her so hard she arched off the bed to slide his fingers in, and she sucked them in greedily. The stretch dismayed her, but he’d been right, she wanted it. Her body was in a place beyond pain. All the stress, all the anger, all the love, seemed to explode out of her and at one point in the madness, she thought she laughed. The only thing she could think as she slowly floated back down to earth was that this was
nothing
like the orgasms she gave herself, and she could get used to it.
Brian raised his head, planting a kiss and then a gentle nibble on her inner thigh. “Mmm. Seems you needed that,” he murmured.
“Oh God, oh God… I’m s-sorry.” Her mind scrambled to right itself as her face flamed. Every bone in her body had melted, but she was shivering uncontrollably.
“Don’t apologize. Come here, sweetheart.” He prowled up the length of her body and lay beside her, pulling her tight against him. She absorbed his strength, his steadiness. Tried to sync her breathing with his 54
Rock Me
just as she’d done in his parlor. His shoulder was pressed against her lips, and she sank her teeth into it without conscious thought, holding on for dear life.
Silent minutes passed and finally she trusted herself enough to speak to him without bursting into tears. “I had no idea.”
“That it would be so good?”
“Yeah.”
“Or you might’ve done it a long time ago, huh?” he teased.
“I’d still want to wait for you.” She hoped she was wrong, but she thought she could feel the unease creeping into him at the implication that she’d been saving it for him all this time. She hadn’t been, really, but only because she’d never thought there was a chance in hell she would end up here. If she had, she might not have allowed another guy to get close enough to even put his arm around her.
“You’re sweet,” he said, trailing his fingertips up and down her spine. “I can’t believe there hasn’t been anyone. I know you’ve dated.”
“That’s not the equivalent of putting out.”
“It’s not?” He laughed, and she smacked him on the arm.
“
No
, it’s not. I’ve dated a few guys. None of them did anything for me. Then there was an incident…”
She trailed off, not sure she really wanted to tell him about that. She should have known he would pick up on it. Suddenly his voice wasn’t low and seductively rough, but sharp and like the crack of a whip.
“What incident?”
The memory was still as vivid in her mind as it had been the day after it happened, but she no longer felt the crushing panic in her chest she’d felt then. Surely it would be safe to share it with him without freaking out. “It was something that happened at Deanne’s graduation party. This guy was drunk and wouldn’t leave me alone, and he ended up trapping me in a corner, pulling a forced seduction bit. I’d let him kiss me at first, but when his hands started wandering, I tried to push him away and he wouldn’t stop. He got his hands under my shirt and was saying really nasty things in my ear. I guess to everyone else we looked like another couple making out in the corner, and it seemed to go on forever before anyone intervened. Deanne’s fiancé finally dragged him away, but he was Tyler’s friend so they were all playing it off like it was so funny. Saying, ‘Oh, don’t mind him, baby, he’s just drunk’. But for a minute there, I was scared to death. I couldn’t stop shaking afterward.”
“Who was it?”
“No one you know. He doesn’t live here.” Fortunately for him, because Brian’s tone held the promise of murder.
“Fucking bastard,” he growled. “Tyler’s a bastard, too, for not yanking his boy in line. I can’t stand that little frat-rat douche bag, and if I knew the son of a bitch who wouldn’t stop pawing you, I’d break his arms for you, Candace.”
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She couldn’t resist the glow that spread through her chest, so she reveled in it. “Don’t worry too much about it. For a while I didn’t want anything to do with any guys, but I got over that. Obviously.”
“Whatever happens with us, you can trust that all you have to do is say the word and I’ll stop. Hell, you don’t even have to say the word. Unlike the dumbass who cornered you, I can tell when you’re enjoying it and when you’re not.”
“I know.”
“But I have to say.” He trailed his fingers down her cheek, his eyes glinting wickedly at her in the faint light. “I didn’t get nearly enough of you. You told me to do one thing, and I did it, but we didn’t stipulate as to whether I could do it more than once. So with your permission, of course, I’d love to get another taste of you. Draw it out. Make it last.” He pulled away, searching her face. “You don’t mind how I talk to you, do you?”
