Rooter (Double H Romance) (33 page)

He chose me.

Chapter 42
Finding Our Way

Thursday and Friday pass much the same as Monday and Tuesday had with Rooter and me only seeing each other after I get off work. Candace has reached out to him each day, and he’s gone over to check on her. She claims she’s still as stressed as ever, though nothing has happened with the baby.

Rooter doesn’t know what else he can possibly do to improve the situation. I try my best to console him by telling him he’s doing everything he can. He’s been supportive and present for her. Short of him moving in with her—and I’ll be damned if that happens—there’s nothing else he can do.

I’m getting used to our predicament and with each passing day it gets a little easier. I admire him for the way he cares for and worries about the baby. He’ll make a great dad.

Last night as we laid in bed we talked about turning the third bedroom into a nursery. I recommended he gets started on it now. We could paint the walls a gender neutral color such as yellow and get a crib and whatever else a person needs for a newborn baby. I may not have envisioned this for us, but it’s happening so I might as well be a helpful participant.

Rooter likes it when I speak in terms of “we.” Although it isn’t my baby, and he doesn’t expect anything from me in terms of raising him or her, it makes him happy to know he has my support.

I still wish things were different and that he wasn’t going to be a dad. I never wanted a ready-made family. But I do fully support him and I’ll be there for him with whatever he needs.

When we get to his parent’s house for Sunday dinner Camilla scuttles to us and hugs me first.

“I’m so glad you’re here.” She pulls back with a radiant smile. Camilla is a beautiful woman. I see so much of her in Rooter. They have the same eyes and smile.

“I’m happy to be here,” I tell her and return the smile.

This time I brought a bathing suit with me so I go into the house to change. I take my time as I walk to Rooter’s old room and pause to look at family photos along my way. I find one of Rooter when he was much younger, in high school. Even as a young man he was built and obviously strong. He’s standing with Bear in front of an old, black convertible Camaro. As per usual, Bear isn’t smiling.

“My boy was always handsome,” Camilla says, startling me.

I jump and spin around to face her. “Yes, I see that.”

“He always had a heart of gold.” She smiles with pride. “So protective of me and Isa.”

“I imagine so.”

“I always knew he was capable of loving deeply,” she says, misty eyed. “And I believe you are too, Sophie. I can see it in your eyes.”

“Yeah?”

She nods and rubs my arms in a comforting, motherly fashion. “I realize this isn’t easy for you, sweetie. And I won’t kid you, it’ll get even harder some days.”

She’s spot on. I rub my eyes with my thumb and index finger. “We’ve had some bad days.”

“He loves you so much, Sophie.” She stares into my eyes as though trying to convince me.

“I love him, too.”

Camilla leads me up the stairs to his room and closes the door once we’re inside. “Be patient with him, but be firm, too. He’ll mess up and make you mad, but I know he’ll try hard to give you what you need.”

“He has been trying,” I admit and take a seat on the bed. “But it’s hard for him. He feels torn between doing what’s right for the baby and what’s right for me and us.”

Camilla sits beside me and appraises me in a maternal manner. The way Loraine had done on many occasions. “Having a relationship means finding balance and compromising. You need to help each other as you find your way together. If you can do that, everything will be just fine.”

“It’s been difficult to find balance,” I admit and pick at the bedspread.

She sighs and rubs the top of her thighs. “My mama always said nothing worth having comes easy. We have to work for what we want. My life has been a testament to that.”

Her words make me recall the story Rooter told me about her past. “Nothing in my life has been easy, either.”

“He hasn’t given me any details, but he told me you’ve had it pretty tough.” She tucks a stray lock of hair behind my ear. “It’s why he was initially hesitant to be with you. He didn’t want to make your life harder.”

The idea of us never being together makes my chest ache. Regardless of everything, I simply can’t envision never having been together. “I can’t imagine him not being in my life.”

Her brow furrows with worry. “I hate to think what would happen to him if you broke up.”

I reach for her arm to comfort her. “You don’t need to worry about that, Camilla. I don’t give up easily.”

“I’m glad to hear that, baby girl,” she says and pulls me into a tight embrace. “But if you call me Camilla one more time, I’m gonna put you over my knee and swat that tiny behind.”

“Sorry, mama.” We both laugh.

Later that night, Rooter and I cuddle in bed after making love. It’s been a mostly perfect day. Candace called after dinner and cried about how it should be her there with him instead of me. He didn’t know what to say to her so Camilla got on the phone and told her she needed to stop putting herself through this. It isn’t healthy for the baby and the sooner she can make peace with the situation, the better. She didn’t argue with Camilla, probably because she knows better, but she told her Rooter was making a mistake with me. Camilla said, “Love is never a mistake.” That was the end of that conversation.

Rooter and I lay on our sides facing one another. His hand is on my hip, mine is on his chest. I remember seeing the photo of him and Bear and am sparked by curiosity. There’s still so much I don’t know about him. “Tell me something about you I don’t know.”

He stares into my eyes while he thinks. “I have a younger brother and sister by my biological father. Thomas and Ashley. He was named after my dad.” He blanches, apparently hating calling him dad. “Thomas isn’t even a year younger than me. Ashley’s your age.”

“Wow.” I wasn’t expecting such a heavy confession.

“I met them a couple years back. They didn’t know who I was.”

“You didn’t tell them?”

He shakes his head. “Nah. They didn’t seem very interested in me.”

“They probably would’ve been if they knew you were their brother.”

“I doubt it. They were every bit as stuck up and shallow as their father.”

I stroke his cheek with the back of my hand. “I’m sorry.”

“A glutton for punishment, I went to his house—my dad’s—when they were all there. I watched him with them.” He swallows. This is hard for him. “The fucked up part of it all was that he seemed like such a good dad. The way he looked at them with love and pride. One big happy family.”

“That had to have been difficult to see.”

“Yeah. I think I’d rather he was a deadbeat dad to all of us. As fucked up as that sounds.” He rubs the back of his neck. “But the hardest part for me was that I felt like I’d betrayed Mick. I went there to see what I’d missed out on when in truth, I haven’t missed out on anything because Mick has been a phenomenal father. I wouldn’t change that for anything in this world. I’m glad Thomas O’Shea abandoned me. I love Mick and I’m glad to be his son.”

His name would’ve been Jace Alexander O’shea if Thomas hadn’t abandoned him. Or maybe he’d be Thomas O’Shea Junior. I can’t imagine that at all. He isn’t Jace O’Shea or Thomas anything. He is Rooter, the man he was always meant to be. The man I love. I lean forward and kiss his forehead.

“You’re right, you didn’t miss out on anything. You have a wonderful family. I wish I had a family like yours.”

His eyes soften. “Babe, you do. You have my family now. The more they get to know you, the more they love you.”

Tears pool in the corner of my eyes. For him and for me. Not for our past, but in hope of letting go of the past and creating a future full of love and happiness. “The feeling is mutual.”

He swallows. “I don’t just love you, Sophie. I consider you my family. You’re a part of me now. You always will be.”

“When do I get to tell you I love you?”

He smiles and kisses my hand. “I’m still working on earning it, babe.”

The next morning, after Rooter leaves for work, I go home and Miranda and I talk about our men while she gets ready for work.

She and Bear are hot and heavy. He’s spent as many nights with her as I’ve spent with Rooter. They haven’t exchanged I love you’s yet, but she’s pretty sure she’s in love and that the feeling is mutual. Evidently, Bear’s the one who made things official. He flat out told her she was his, and that she needed to cut ties with any other guys if there were any.

I never in a million years would’ve imagined Miranda would end up with a biker, but she seems happier than ever. Everything about her is lighter and brighter. She’s like a ray of sunshine whenever I see her. She isn’t even fretting about her brother anymore. Miranda said she’s come to peace with it all but still holds out hope he’ll get clean and be the Mike he used to be.

After she leaves for work, I hop in the shower. As soon as I finish blow drying my hair the doorbell rings. I trot down the stairs and pull the curtain aside to see who it is before opening the door. My breath catches and fire lights within my veins at the sight of Candace standing on the other side of the door.

Chapter 43
The Fallout

Oh hell no!

I jerk the door open so hard it slams into the wall. There will be a hole in the drywall from the doorknob but I don’t care. Seeing Candace at my door in her short skirt and playboy bunny tank top have my blood boiling.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” I shout.

The tears in her eyes do not play on my sympathies. It’s one thing for her to harass the father of her baby but it’s absolutely one thousand percent not okay for her to come here with her bullshit.

“We need to talk, Sophie.” Her voice is meek which only pisses me off more.

I roll my eyes. “Cut the bullshit tears, Candace. They don’t work on me.”

She straightens up right away proving me right. “I’m not going to let you take my family away. The Russo’s are my family. Mine.”

I cross my arms and shift my weight to one foot. “That may very well be true, but according to Rooter, they’re my family, too.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “They’re
not
your family. You’ve barely known them a month. I’ve known then my entire life.”

“I’m not disputing that, but Rooter loves me. We’re together and we’re staying together. There’s nothing you can do to change that.”

She tosses her head back and laughs. “Honey, if I had a dollar for every girl who told me that I wouldn’t need to work for a year.”

She’s just messing with you, Sophie.
I try to slam the door in her face but she puts her hands against it. “Leave. Now,” I growl, out of patience.

“Do you think you’re the first girl he’s done this with? He falls into infatuation with someone new every month.”

She’s trying to psyche me out, but I can’t let it work. I turn the tables. “If that’s true, why do you want him? Why chase after a guy who doesn’t want you?”

“He obviously never told you our story or you would understand.”

I narrow my eyes. “He told me all about you.”

“Oh?” She cocks her head to the side. “Did he tell you I was his first love? That we lost our virginity to each other when we were sixteen?”

That, he did not tell me.
“Take your bullshit lies and get the hell out of my face.”

She scrolls through her phone, I imagine to call him. Good. I hope she does so he can put an end to this. She holds the phone up and her voice blares through the speaker. It’s a recording.

“I love you, Rooter,” she cries. “I always have. I’m sorry I hurt you back then. Are you going to hate me forever?”

“I don’t hate you Candace. I’ll always care about you.” His voice is tender. Rage spreads through my veins at the sound of him talking to her that way.

“Then why are you doing this?” She asks him. “Are punishing me for what I did?”

“No. Of course not.” He sounds offended.

“You know we belong together, baby.” My skin crawls at the sound of her calling him baby. “You and I make more sense than you and her.”

“You’re right, we do make more sense—”

What the hell?
Unable to listen to another word I snatch the phone from her hand and throw it with all of my might into the street. She retreats toward the steps and I follow like a predator getting ready to pounce. “Get the fuck away from my house!”

I puff my chest and fling my hand in the air. She takes a quick step backward and loses her balance. Everything happens so fast. I reach for her, but it’s too late. She has fallen down my front porch stairs. I wasn’t going to hit her. I was just going to point at her car and insist she get in it and leave before I call the cops.

“You crazy bitch,” she shouts and clutches her stomach. “I’m pregnant!”

I run to her side but she kicks me in the shin. I grimace and reach for her. “I wasn’t going to hit you.”

“Stay away from me!” She scrambles to her feet, still clutching her stomach, and limps to her car.

“Are you okay?” I chase after her with genuine concern. “Do you need to go to the hospital?”

“I don’t need your help!” She gets in her car and slams the door.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I say through the window. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah right. Wait until Rooter finds out what you’ve done!”

She peels away and I scramble into the house and sprint up to my room to get my phone. I must get ahold of Rooter before she does.

“Babe?” He answers on the first ring.

“Candace was just here,” I say, out of breath.

“What? What was she doing there?”

“Trying to talk me into leaving you.” I pace back and forth in my room with one hand clasped to the side of my head. “Rooter, she fell.”

“Fell?” His voice is panicked. “Is she okay?”

“I think so. She wouldn’t let me help her.”

“Shit, I better call her.”

I squeeze my eyes shut. “You can’t. I threw her phone into the street.”

“Dammit, Sophie! What happened?”

“She was playing a recording of a conversation you had with her and it pissed me off.” My heart feels like it will explode from my chest. “I swear to God I didn’t touch her.”

“Fuck. I need to find her. Stay put. I’ll call you later.”

Hours pass and I still haven’t heard from Rooter. I tried calling him about an hour ago and he didn’t answer so I texted, but he never responded.

I hear the rumble of a motorcycle and dart outside, but it’s just Bear. “What happened? Rooter won’t answer my calls.”

“Let’s go inside,” he says and leads me into the house. He motions for me to sit on the sofa and takes a seat in the chair. “Sophie, it isn’t good. She lost the baby.”

“Oh, God no.” The poor baby. Poor Rooter. I never meant for this to happen.

“She says you attacked her.” I detect skepticism in his voice. He must not believe her. “That you pushed her down the stairs.”

“That’s not true! I never laid a hand on her.”

“But she fell down the stairs?” His voice isn’t at all accusatory.

“I screamed at her to leave and she backed away and fell.” I hold my hand to my chest. “I tried to help her.”

“That’s not the story she gave Rooter. He’s furious, Sophie.”

I sit forward with my head in my hands and let the tears fall. “She came here and got in my face, Bear. She did this. Not me.”

He reaches out and rests his hand on my shoulder. “For what it’s worth, I believe you. I just thought you should be prepared when Rooter gets here.”

I look up at him. “Prepared for what?”

“I’ve never seen him like this. He’s angry, and he blames you.”

I sit up straight and take a deep breath. Rooter knows me. He knows I wouldn’t do anything to hurt his baby. “Then I’ll make him understand that I didn’t do anything.”

“I don’t think he’ll believe you. He said you went after her at his parent’s house. Did you?”

“I jumped up at her, but I wasn’t going to hit her.”
Does Rooter really not know that?

“Sophie, I know how much he cares about you, but she has painted a very ugly, convincing picture. She said she came here to try to mend fences so the three of you could come to an understanding and move forward.”

“Bullshit! She wasn’t trying to mend fences! She came here trying to get me to leave Rooter.” I stand up and pull my hair.
This cannot be happening.
“She played a recording of a conversation they had where she apologized for hurting him and he said how much he cared about her. She told me he lost his virginity to her!”

“She didn’t say anything about that, but it probably won’t help your case any. He’ll think it was your motive for pushing her.”

“I didn’t push her!”

He holds his hands up in surrender. “I believe you.”

“What am I going to do?” The question is rhetorical. I don’t expect Bear to have the answer.

“I don’t know. But you need to prepare yourself for an entirely different guy when he gets here. Which is why I’m here. To make sure things don’t get out of hand.”

My chest squeezes and my eyes go wide. “Do you think he’d actually hurt me?”

“Rooter has never hit a woman in his life, but Sophie, he’s out of his mind right now. I’d tell you to leave and give him time to cool off, but if you hide from him he’ll take it as an admission of guilt.”

I’ve never been afraid of Rooter. I have a hard time believing he’d do anything to hurt me. But Bear, his lifelong friend, is here to protect me. If he thinks there’s a chance I could get hurt, there must be a real possibility of it. My stomach churns as hot tears continue to spill down my face. I choke, gasping for air and Bear pulls me into his arms.

“He has to believe me.” I grip the leather of Bear’s cut in a tight fist. “He has to.”

Bear and I watch the clock in silence for a little over an hour. The sound I once loved, that I lived to hear, now causes me panic as Rooter pulls into his driveway. We turn our attention to the door, waiting for it to open. When it does, Rooter steps in wearing an angry scowl. His jaw is set, his eyes are narrowed. His posture is rigid. He looks from me to Bear who sits in the chair across from me.

“What are you doing here?” Rooter barks at him.

“Just trying to keep things on an even keel, brother.”

I lurch up with the intention of going to Rooter but the glare he shoots me stops me in my tracks. “Bear told me about the baby. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare say you’re sorry.” He takes a step forward and his nostrils flare. “You are not sorry.”

I hold my hands up in front of me and speak calmly. “Rooter, I swear I didn’t lay a hand on Candace.”

“That’s not what she said.” He widens his stance and purses his lips.

It hurts he believes her over me. I take a small step forward. “How many times has she lied? Do you honestly believe her over me?”

“I saw the way you went after her the other night!” He screams, angry and accusatory.

“I’d never hit a pregnant woman. It was an accident. We were arguing. She said things. I got in her face and screamed for her to leave,” I point toward the porch, “she lost her footing on the stairs and fell.”

“So you admit you are to blame.” He clenches his fist.

“No,” I shake my head vehemently. “I don’t admit to that. She came here and got in my face. She did this.”

He strides toward me, stopping a few feet away and points in my face. “You got in her face, you were going to hit her and she fell down the stairs! You did this! You killed my kid!”

“No. No, I didn’t,” I sob. “You have to believe me.”

He stands before me shaking, with his hands balled into fists at his side. There’s a violent gleam in his eyes making the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Bear gets up and stands between us.

Rooter takes a small step sideways and peers around Bear. When he speaks it’s through gritted teeth. “I’ll never believe another word you say. I never want to hear your voice again.” He points at me again. “If you’re smart, you’ll stay away from me and you sure as hell better stay away from Candace.”

“Rooter please don’t do this,” I beg and step forward but Bear holds his arm out to stop me from reaching him. “Please. You know I’d never do anything to hurt you. I love you.”

“I can’t even stand to look at you,” Rooter spits. “I could never love someone who could take the life of an innocent child. I never want to see you again. If you have half a brain, you’ll make sure I don’t.”

With that he turns on his heel and stalks out the door, slamming it behind him. I drop to my knees and sob uncontrollably calling after Rooter to come back. Begging him not to leave me.