ROMANCE : PARANORMAL ROMANCE: Alpha's heart(BBW Pregnancy Werebear Shifter Romance) (New Adult Paranormal Romance) (28 page)

“Nina, I’ve never seen you look more ravishing or desirable. It’s a good thing that you came out with me to shake things up a little bit. I’ve been worried about you. You seem to have lost something and you seem to be just going through the motions.” Nina looked at her best friend Susan with her long blond hair and voluptuous good looks and she wonders if she ever did attract a man like that. “That dress is going to knock any man out of their boots. I guess it’s true that a little black dress is a girl’s best friend. We all have one and now you can say you have one too.”

“Susan, you know that this is not me. I’m not this risqué or erotic. If I were to step out of the doors wearing this, I would probably be arrested for indecent exposure.” Nina was looking in the mirror and she noticed that her dirty blond locks were the perfect contrast to the dark dress that she was currently wearing. It had a plunging neckline with ruffles to indicate more than what there was. It was short on the bottom and rose up to almost a scandalous amount. One wrong move in any direction and she would be putting herself out there for everybody to see.

“That’s precisely the reason why you should get it, Nina. We know that eventually you’ll have use for it. It’s better to have it now, than to never have it at all. I don’t think I’ve seen you out on a date in at least a year. You can’t tell me it’s because of Benjamin. He’s 10 years old now and he has his own friends and before long, he’ll be old enough to stay home on his own. You’ll blink and you’ll find that life passes you by. I don’t want to see that happen to you.”

“I know that she means well, but she has no idea what I’ve been putting myself through. That trip five years ago is still haunting me. Every morning, I wake up with his face in my mind and the regret of leaving him behind. I never told her the story. Maybe I’m embarrassed by what happened, or maybe I just want to keep it to myself. I know that there’s no chance that I’m going to see him again, especially after I left things cold.”
  Looking at this dress, Nina begins to see that maybe it’s time to finally shed that memory and get on with the rest of her life.

It had been over five years, but that navy seal with that killer instinct in his eyes and body to kill for was the only thing that mattered. She found herself measuring the men that she went out with by a certain standard that they couldn’t possibly live up to. It didn’t matter if they were nice, well educated or even had a bad boy quality. She wanted the whole thing, the total package and the only person that had ever given that to her was John Evans. That man knew how to make a girl feel like a natural woman and also show them that they were respected enough that foreplay was mandatory.

“Earth to Nina. Where did you go? You’re here one minute and then you were in that secret place that puts a smile on your face. You lit up like the 4
th
of July and now I know that there’s something underneath all of this. I think it might be a man. You’ve never said as much, but I have seen you looking exactly like you are right now. Your eyes seem to glow with a memory and if that memory is the only thing that is holding you back, then I suggest that you think of something else. I’m starting to see the reason why you are alone, Nina. You want something that you can’t have. You crave it, you wait for it, but you know in the deepest part of yourself that it’s never going to happen. Perhaps, he’s married and you got caught up in an affair of a heart that made you feel like you were doing yourself a disservice.” Susan had always had Nina’s back, but this time, she saw that this was a losing battle. Something was eating at her and preventing her from finding the true happiness that she deserved.

Nina was the perfect 10 with a body that was sculpted out of the gym every morning for an hour. With her clothes on, her body looked like a man’s wet dream come true. With her clothes off, she became the ultimate fantasy with pendulum breasts that were a natural C Cup. She also had the kind of nipples that a man could chew on for days. She was only 5 foot two, 100 pounds, but she still felt that there was need for improvement. It’s was her piercing green eyes that made most men take a second look.

“I do have a secret, but I really don’t want to talk about it. It’s painful time in my life and a pleasurable one at the same time. I don’t know how that’s even possible, except for the fact that I had a wonderful weekend with a young man and then after it was over with, I left without saying a word or leaving any signs that I wanted to continue pursuing something between us. I’ve been hiding, hoping that he would find me, but how can he, when he doesn’t even know that I came from this town. He lives a life of mystery and there are times that I know that he’s bad for me, but I don’t care.”

“I want everything and I think that I should never have to settle for second best. If life means for us to come together at some point, then so be it. Until then, I need to stop living in the past and live for the present. If I don’t, then I’m going to find myself shying away from the perfect man. He’s out there and maybe I’ve already found him and because of my feelings for John, I let him go. That was a sad thought. I did not want to go down that road. I did not want to live like a hermit for the rest of my life. I’d found comfort in television shows, but now I had to go out into the real world.”

“Nina, I really do have to run. I have a few errands that I have to do, before I go home and make supper. I think that I’m going to take it slow, because I always have more fun when Steve is there to make supper with me. Sometimes we don’t even make it out of the kitchen, if you know what I mean.” Susan was only trying to make her friend smile, but she realized that her attempt at doing just that had backfired. Her happiness with Steve was getting underneath her best friend’s skin.

“You don’t have to rub it in. I know that you have the best life and I would never begrudge for having everything you want. I would like to have what you have, but I have no idea how to go about it. I can’t just go into a bar and pick up a guy. Most likely than not, he’s only there for one thing and one thing only. I’m not really looking for a one night stand. I want something with more substance and is going to stand up to the test of time. I want that friendship that is going to turn us into lovers. You started that way with Steve and you’ve been going strong ever since. Why is it, so hard for me to find that best friend that could turn into a whole lot more?”

“Nina, you can’t find it, because you haven’t been letting it find you. You need to walk amongst the people, talk to them and get to know them on another level besides just idle chitchat. I want you to go out tonight in the black dress and I want you to say to yourself that you are over him and that you can do better than somebody that was only a weekend affair.” There was a small problem with that. They both knew that going into a club would only cause those young men in their informative years to become drooling idiots. They were older than most of the crowd at 35 apiece and had been best friends since they were kids.

“I might just take you up on that suggestion. I’ve been doing nothing, but letting a very nice night keep me from moving on. I have to stop letting him get to me like this. I’m sure that he hasn’t been pining over me. He has probably already slept with at least five or more women, since we met. I doubt that weekend was special to him.”
“What I don’t want to tell her is that I don’t think that it’s possible for me to find somebody that even comes close to John. Wouldn’t it be something if there was an identical twin out there somewhere that had the same traits and the same qualities as John? They say that everybody has one and believe me, I’ve looked, but I’ve yet to see his carbon copy come walking through any door.

Nina and Susan bought some clothing, including the little black dress that was going to become a staple in Nina’s closet. She had been working, as a closet organizer and Susan could always find time to meet up with her for these little adventures. She had her own business of soaps and other key things for girls. It started off, as a joke between friends, but then it escalated and now she had two shops on different sides of the city. People clamored for what she could give them. Nina was happy for her friend’s success.

“I know that we’ve talked this thing to death, Nina, but all of this has been for your own good. It shows you that I care for you and I would never want anything, but the best. You’re obviously going to do what you want anyway and there’s no way for me to stop that. At the very least, go to the grocery store. I know it sounds stupid, but I’ve found some interesting delights that certainly put a smile on my face. That is, until I met Steve. He’s everything that I would want and more for you. I wish that I had the capacity to share, but I’m not into that kind of freestyle lifestyle.”

Nina had seen Steve on several occasions and there was a small part of her that wanted to seduce him and turn his head in her direction. Nina realized that she was just projecting. She didn’t want to do it and to sabotage her friends happiness would’ve been a very mean spirited thing to do. She just wanted to reconfirm her sexuality and know that she could bring the boys to the yard.

Chapter two

Nina separated from her friend in the mall, carrying her newfound acquisitions underneath her arm. There was no way that anybody could see through the bag into the contents within. It just made her little subconscious to have this in her possession and walking around like it was the most normal thing in the world.

She was passing by the grocery store and those words that had come from her best friend hit her like a ton of bricks. Thinking nothing of it, she walked into the grocery store with a plan in mind that she would make the circuit and then walk back out proving her friend wrong. She’d changed back to her customary blue jeans and it wasn’t lost on her the way that the guys had constantly been eyeballing her the entire time that she was walking around.

“
I don’t know why they don’t have the courage to ask me out. I’ve seen at least three guys that have ticked most of the boxes and yet they only stare and probably wonder if I’m taken or not. If they really want to know, then all they have to do is ask. I’m sure that they’re worried that I will give them the brush off, but that’s the risk of playing in the dating pool. If you’re not willing to jump in feet first, then you may as well just sit on the sidelines and dangle your toes in the water.”

Taking those few steps down into the produce department, she spied a man with the same kind of haircut that John had back in Greece. It was a little longer, but still primarily the same style. He had the same basic build and apparently he was looking for some kind of steak to complement the bottle of fine wine that was currently in his basket.

John had no idea that Nina was behind him, cocking her head sideways and trying to envision him naked. He’d only stopped by to pick up a few supplies for a barbecue that his friend was having in his honor for coming back in one piece. He didn’t have a whole lot of time and two weeks had always gone by in the snap of his fingers. John had borrowed his friend’s brown bomber jacket. It was the perfect fit for his 6’3, 220 pound frame. It was a little tight on the arms, but his biceps were a work of art that was perfected with a regiment that an old friend of his had come up with. He had found that building muscle wasn’t, as difficult as everybody made it out to be. He just needed to know how to rest those muscles between days and work on different parts of the body to make it an all around healthy workout style.

Nina was doing her best trying to get him to turn around. She was tempted to call his name and risk the possibility of embarrassment. She could actually feel that her palms were sweating, her skin was tingling and that familiar feel of his fingers touching her in that not so subtle way had come back to her. Even through the white and blue blouse that she was wearing; her nipples were poking obscenely against the almost sheer material of her black Lacey bra. Inside her jeans was the piece that went with the bra. Those panties left very little to the imagination. In the right pair of manly and suggestive hands, they would’ve been rendered useless.

She followed from behind, until finally she took that educated guess of where he was going to go to next. If it was John, he had a real penchant for anything chocolate. His Achilles heel had always been rocky road ice cream. She remembered having it in their hotel room, feeding it to each other like lovers would after a particularly raunchy and marathon kind of sex.

“
It can’t be him. It’s just not possible that the universe would somehow play into bringing us together after all this time. I don’t believe in fate or destiny and I believe that things happen when they happen. Sometimes you have to take the bull by the horns to make it happen. The guy that has had me twisted up in knots could be mere feet away from me and he doesn’t even know that I’m here.” She moved cautiously and quickly away from him, skirting the entire store from another angle and coming in from the side where the rocky road ice cream was located.

During her time in security for a mall, she knew that most people wouldn’t look up or wouldn’t look down. With that in mind, she moved to her knees and pushed a few pieces of a display out of her way to give her easier access to see him coming around the corner. She waited with bated breath, consciously aware of the fact that her heart was beating a million miles an hour.