Rocked All Night (BBW New Adult Rock Star Romance) (8 page)

“No,” Rick said, a bit too forcefully. “No point making all of us leave early and miss out on the fun.”

Matthew looked at him and then over at me, but didn’t say anything. He just nodded and wandered slowly back towards the dance floor.

“Slick Ricky, very slick.”

“Shut up, Jules.”

He called me Jules again. I grinned and there was a spring in my step as we left the club and climbed into the waiting stretch limousine. We sat next to each other, not touching, but as far away from Dex as possible. Once back at the hotel we’d have a few hours of night left to be alone together and I planned to make every second count.

The next evening I was sleep deprived but really, really happy. I’d gotten up at some time after noon following another multi-orgasmic session with Rick, had lunch with Becca as promised and listened to her complain about some little tiff she and Dex had, which explained the state I’d discovered him in the night before. It said something that a tiny disagreement could make him feel the need to get hammered. I wasn’t sure if it was good or bad, but something, for sure.

Now I was heading over to the venue for our first show. It sat thousands and was one of the smaller ones we’d be playing. But it was the first and I could barely keep from bouncing in my seat on the way. Even the presence of my mother yapping bullshit into my ear couldn’t contain my excitement.

As soon as we pulled in and a PA handed over my pass, I practically sprinted inside. The arena was huge. And in two days’ time, it would be filled with people – all looking at and listening to me singing my songs. I could barely believe it was finally happening.

I had to calm down enough to get a tour and run of the day’s schedule, but I was so energized it felt like I’d had a dozen cups of coffee. I noticed my backing band helping to load in equipment for rehearsal and I got even more excited, if that was even possible.

Making my way out in front of the stage, I noticed one problem. Instead of two platforms extending into either side of the standing-room section, there was just one in the middle. That made some of my choreography dicey and I realized I needed to check in with the stage manager, Adam. I asked a venue staff member and he said Adam was in a meeting but would be backstage when he finished. So, I decided to check out my dressing room and wait there. I wandered down the line of labeled rooms but didn’t see mine, so I went back in the other direction. On the way I heard Rick’s voice coming from the green room and waffled about whether or not to go in.

Part of me wanted to, of course. To see him and touch him. And, I was somewhat surprised to realize, just to hang out with him. I’d come to enjoy his gruff demeanor and the moments of humor that snuck out when he wasn’t paying attention.

I was about to just go for it when I heard another voice, this one raised in anger. Becca. Knowing their history, I was going to break up the inevitable argument when Rick’s words stopped me cold, mid-stride.

“Becca, wait,” he said. “I know it isn’t your fault they’ve fucked up the dressing room assignments.”

“That’s right, it isn’t. Not everything that happens wrong in the world is my fault.”

“Hey, what the fuck, I…” He paused. “No, you’re right. I deserve that.”

“Yes, you do. Wait, what?”

“I’m sorry.”

There was a long silence.

“Did you just apologize to me?” she asked, clearly floored by this unlikely occurrence.

“Yeah.”

“Oh. Um…oh. Okay. Well, I’ve got a call into the house manager and I’m sure they’ll correct it before tonight’s technical rehearsal.”

“Okay. I’ll leave you to it, then.”

“All right.” Another pause. “Rick…”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks. For apologizing. We’re all under a lot of pressure and it means a lot that you get that.”

He sighed. “I always have, Becca. And I know I’m an asshole to everyone, but it really isn’t personal. I’m just…”

“An asshole,” she replied, laughing. “I know that.”

“Yeah. Well, that probably isn’t going to change, but you’re kind of like family now, right? So I’m the jerk everyone tolerates and ignores.” His voice was light and casual, but the deeper emotion behind the words was clear. Rick would never be a sweet, cuddly guy. But he could admit when he was wrong and that meant a lot.

“Okay.”

“So, anyway, you get back to work and I’ll do the same. Oh, and one other thing. Whatever Dex did, forgive him. He’s an idiot but it tears him up when you’re mad at him.”

“I…okay. Thank you.”

He strolled out of the room and right into my path.

“Hey.”

I grinned. “Hey yourself.”

“How much of that did you just hear?”

“Enough. Come with me.” I grabbed his hand and dragged him down the hallway.

“Where are we going?”

“To the bathroom. I’m feeling very much in the mood for some fun suddenly.”

“Wait, what? Last night you liked me being rude and broody. Now I’m barely nice for a second and you like that too?”

“I’m a complicated girl. Just go with it.”

He chuckled. “Whatever gets me laid, sweetheart.”

“Stop talking before I change my mind and leave you to your own devices in a broom closet, jackass.”

*

By the time that night’s rehearsal was over, I was close to collapsing. A great day, to be sure, but a long one. And, having satisfied my need for Rick with a quickie in a restroom backstage, I could go to bed alone and actually sleep. The morning would bring another long day and I wanted to be well-rested for a change.

So, I went back to my dressing room, changed back into my street clothes and was packing up my bag to leave when someone knocked on my door.

“Come in,” I called reluctantly.

“Julia, I’m glad you’re still here,” my mother said. She walked into the room and stood in the middle, under the light fixture as if on stage.

I considered making a snotty comment about how in that light I could see her age and her roots coming in, but managed to keep it to myself.

“What’s up, Mom?”

“I was trying to get you earlier, but so much to do.”

“Sure.”

“Well, I got you something.” She reached in her pocket and pulled out a small velvet pouch.

I groaned. “Please tell me you didn’t waste money we don’t have on expensive stage jewelry. You know I don’t care about that shit.”

She held out her hand. “It wasn’t expensive. And it isn’t for the stage.”

I took the pouch, confused, and struggled to undo the knot holding it closed. Whatever was inside was small enough to fit in the palm of my hand, but has some weight to it. “What is it?”

She smiled and smoothed down her hair. “It’s not worth much, I don’t think. But it’s been in the family for a long time and…well, it’s yours, now. Just don’t bother trying to pawn it. Everything that could get a good price left with your father or got sold off at some point when we were fighting to keep the house.”

I flinched at the mention of the really hard times from my childhood. I gave my mother a hard time about only caring about my career, but the truth is, she had to. Every penny she earned had gone to lessons and classes and costumes and instruments until I started making enough to support us both. And, beneath the resentment I had towards her, I did appreciate the sacrifices.

“Well, you didn’t need to get me anything.”

“Of course I did,” she insisted. “I’m your mother. And this is a huge occasion. Maybe I don’t gush over you like other parents but I’m very proud of what we…what
you
have accomplished. The hard work it took to get you back on top of the world where you belong.

I smiled and finally managed to open the pouch. I turned it upside down over my hand and a large pendant fell out. It was dark brass and clearly old. A five-point star, it was ornately designed, but delicate at the same time. In the center of twisty scrolling shapes there was a tiny flower, open as if in the mid-day Sun.

“It’s beautiful,” I said softly, holding it up by the attached chain, watching how the light shined behind it the pendant. “You said it’s been in the family? Why have I never heard about it?”

Laura sighed. “I don’t know. I guess I almost forgot it. But your grandmother gave it to me when I graduated from high school. She thought I’d be the star in the family, you know. ‘A world renowned actress of stage and screen’ she used to screech at me all the time.” Her voice was wistful. “Obviously that never happened. I met your father and got pregnant instead. Still, I kept the pendant. Hid it away because it reminded me of everything I’d failed to accomplish. But here you are. A star, at last. More talented than I could have ever been, or she could have ever hoped. So it’s yours now.”

Tears stung my eyes and I closed my fingers around the star. “Thank you. This means a lot.”

She smiled and patted me on the shoulder. “Well, you’re welcome.”

We stood there staring at each other for a long moment, neither sure what to do. Normal mothers and daughters would have hugged and cried or gone out for ice cream or manicures. But we were not normal, and in this emotional moment that fact was more obvious than ever.

I cleared my throat and smiled. “So, um…do you want to ride back to the hotel with me?”

“I can’t,” she said, pulling her phone out of her pocket, the spell broken. “I’ve got a late meeting with the publicity team. But I’ll see you tomorrow. Bright and early for the photo shoot, remember.”

“Yup. Got it.” The points of the star pendant dug into my skin as I clutched it tightly. When the door shut behind my mother I opened my fingers and looked down at it. Pretty. The flower in the center of the pendant drew my eye again and again. Like the star’s open heart. I wondered if mine was opening too.

*

The next day was a flurry of activity. Yet another photo shoot, three radio interviews, and meeting, meetings, meetings, all before even going to the arena for the dress rehearsal. I was pretty sure rock and roll shouldn’t include so many damned meetings, but no one asked my opinion on the matter.

Finally I was alone for a few minutes in my dressing room. I put on my outfit for the show to make sure all the alterations worked and went over to look at myself in the mirror.

“Hot stuff,” I told my reflection. Catching sight of the star pendant hanging low between my breasts, I ran a finger over it and smiled.

I checked the clock and realized I had plenty of time and nothing to do. Which sounded like a perfect time to find Rick. Everyone else was busy. Becca had been running ragged; she only hung up the phone earlier long enough to assure me that she and Dex had made up. All the members of Dream Defiled had been absent for most of the day, too. I assumed running around being assaulted by inane questions like I had. And, to be honest, I just wanted to see him. I’d gotten used to spending time with him in and out of bed and was starting to be willing to admit I enjoyed both, at least to myself.

So, I left my room and made my way down across the hall to the row of small rooms designated for Dream Defiled. Rick’s name was written on the last in the row. I knocked and pushed open the door.

He and Matthew were inside playing a videogame. As usual.

“Hey, Julia!” Matthew called out. “Want to join us?”

“No thanks. I’m shit at games. I was just bored and looking for some people to hang out with.”

Rick barely glanced at me. Playing it cool, I figured. “Sit down if you want.”

“Okay.”

Matthew put down the controller in his hand and smiled at me. “Nervous energy?”

“Yup. I’d have a drink but I heard we’re all cut off until right before show time.”

“Yeah, that’s bullshit,” Rick grumbled before turning back to the game. From what I could tell his character on the screen was machine gunning a bunch of partygoers on a boat.

He played for a few minutes while we watch. Super awkward.

Finally, Matthew stood up. “Well, I need a shower and this seems like a good time to take one.”

“Okay, see you later,” I said as he walked out. Matthew flashed a pointed look I didn’t understand at Rick before shutting the door firmly behind him. “So,” I said once we were alone. “Do you mind if I hang out here for a while?”

“I don’t care.” He didn’t even turn to look at me.

“Okay. You can try to teach me how to play that whatever you’re doing, but I’ll probably never get it.”

“Then I won’t waste my time,” he replied curtly.

“Wow. Um, okay. Is something wrong?”

“Of course not. I’m just trying to get through this level and you yacking in my ear isn’t helping.”

I jumped up. “Well, fuck you very much too, Rick.”

That finally got his attention. He dropped the controller and stood to face me. “Perfect. I knew it. I knew this would happen.”

“What, that you’d be an asshole and I wouldn’t just sit around and let you?”

“No, that you’d turn into a needy little attention and time sucker like all girls do.”

I wanted to punch him. Hard. In the dick. Instead I curled my hands into fists and said, “Don’t you ever talk to me like that.”

“Why? Did I hurt your feelings? Is that what you came in here for? To talk about feelings.”

“Fuck you, you know I’m not like that.”

“Oh yeah, then why are you about to cry right now?”

“I’m not. I’m just trying to keep from knocking your teeth out.”

“Whatever, Julia. Go find someone else to bug. I’m busy.”

“Busy being a dickless jerk.”

“Sweetheart, you know I’m anything but dickless. I’ve got plenty going on down there and you’re a big fan.”

“Congratulations. But that doesn’t make you anything but a nice sex toy.”

“Right back at you.”

“I hate you,” I spat, shaking with rage.

“Great. You’ve had your hissy fit; can you leave me alone now?”

“Shit. I don’t mean that. But I don’t understand why you’re acting like you
do
hate me.”

“I’m not acting like anything. You’re the one acting like I’m your boyfriend. We fuck. It’s fun. The end.”

“Bullshit.”

“What?”

“God, you’re so stupid. And immature. Everything has to be in its little box for you. Girl you fuck. Band you care about. Games you play. That’s a sad little existence, Rick.”