Rock the City: A Midnight Fate Novel (11 page)

Cautiously, I sit next to him. He only raises his head when he feels the bed dip. “Lane, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean for you to get stuck.”

“That was humiliating, Noelle.”

“It wasn’t ideal, but you have to admit it was a little funny.”

He stands up and grabs a shirt from his dresser drawer. “Easton will never let me live that down.”

Before he puts it on, I wrap my arms around him from behind, his skin still warm from the shower. “I promise I’ll do whatever it takes to make it up to you. We only have two weeks, and I don’t want to spend a single second of it with you mad at me.”

He unclasps my hands from his stomach and turns around. “Why does it have to be two weeks?”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m done touring for a while, and we don’t start recording the new album for a couple weeks. The last thing I want is for you to go back home when I’m finally staying in one place long enough to live a semi-normal life.”

“We talked about this. I have a salon to run. I can’t up and leave whenever I want.”

“But two weeks is practically nothing. We were apart for almost six months, Noelle.”

“We’ve had this conversation, Lane. Midnight Fate is your identity. It’s where you found validation when you needed it. New Image Salon is mine—it’s where I found my purpose when everyone else I knew was away at college. I found a way to buy it, and giving that up would be like losing a piece of myself.”

Frustrated, he tips his head back and stares at the ceiling. “Listen to what you’re saying. You’re putting four walls and a roof above what we have. I have to mean more you to than that.”

“You do, but say I do sell it. Then what? I become your professional groupie? The business is all I have that’s mine. Those four walls and that roof are my little slice of Heaven.”

“Did you ever think maybe I want to be your Heaven? That you’re part of my identity now? I
want
you to depend on
me
. I’ll take care of you, Noelle, because what good is all that money in the bank if you’re not here to share it with?”

I wipe away the tear that escapes my eye, wondering how this day got so serious so fast. We’ve been having a lot of fun, and maybe the clueless part of me thought it was going to stay that way. When he’s in town, I visit. When he’s on the road, I’m home working long days in the salon, missing him less than if I was sitting at home waiting for him to call and check in.

Sure, we’ve been getting more serious as each show was checked off the tour schedule, but I didn’t think Lane was ready to make me his forever. We shared sentiments, but when I tell him, “I didn’t know you were all in,” I mean it.

He holds me close, but it still feels like we’re miles away. “You make me forget about all the noise. It fades in the background.”

“Is that your way of saying I make you happy?”

“Yeah, baby. It’s my way of saying I need you and that I don’t want you to leave. I want you to stay and tackle tomorrow with me—and every day after that.”

He says all the right things. All the things I wished I had heard from people in the past but never did. My heart’s in my throat and I can honestly say I’ve never felt more love for him than in his moment. Even all the nights when we were apart and all we had was the sound of each other’s voice to get us through the hours and days. “I love you so much, Lane.”

“I feel like there’s more coming.”

“There’s so much I’ll have to figure out, but if you want me, I’m yours.”

He picks me up and carries me into the living room, a huge smile plastered across his face. Now that he’s figured out what he wants and we’re on the same page, he’s more relaxed than I’ve ever seen him. “I’m staying home tonight so I can kiss every inch of you.”

He tosses me on the sofa, my body caught by the soft pillows and cushions. “It’s Dom’s birthday, you have to go.”

“That’s the thing,” he whispers as he crawls on top of me. “I can do whatever I want now that we’re home.”

“Lane.”

“And do you know what I want, Noelle?”

“What do you want?”

I wait for him to say it, hanging on each breath he takes until he kisses me softly and whispers, “All of you.”

“Do you know what I want?” I drag the tip of my nail down the center of his pecs, all the way to his cock, where I grab a handful and pump him up and down a couple times through the fabric of his pants.

“Shit, Noelle.”

“Is that a yes?”

“Tell me what you want, baby.”

“I want you to remember how much you want me when you’re staring at all those chicks tonight. Because if you so much as touch one of them, you’ll never,
ever
put this back in me again.”

He closes his eyes just as I squeeze his tip. “Damn, you’re sexy when you get territorial.”

“I’m sexy regardless, but you’re the drummer for Midnight Fate. They’ll see you with dollar signs in their eyes.”

He knows I’m being serious, but he stops me with a finger to my lips before I say another word. “You have nothing to worry about.”

“You’re
my
fantasy, Lane. I’m not sharing.”

“That might be what I love about you most. The way you’ve never had dollar signs in your eyes. The way you see me as an ordinary guy who loves you.”

“There’s nothing ordinary about you. You’re a goddamn rock star.”

“To Dom and strippers,” Easton says with a raised glass, earning a smack in the chest from his wife.

There’s enough alcohol in the back of the limo to get a small army drunk, and with the way Easton and Dom are downing it, there’s a good chance they’re already halfway there. I’m still nursing the first glass of champagne they poured because, if I’m going back to Lola’s, I can’t do it if I’m fucked up.

Noelle’s just as quiet, sitting in the corner with her head leaning against the leather seat. Her eyes are focused on the streetlights, her mind a million miles away. To the others, it may look like she’s tired or buzzed, but to me, she’s thinking about staying and what that means for her.

For the first time since she said we’d figure it all out, I realize how lost she really is. The last thing I wanted was to make it harder for her. Leaning back in the seat, I turn my body to face hers. She smiles when I take her small hand in mine, though it doesn’t reach her eyes the way it usually does. “What’s wrong?” I ask her, praying she tells me the truth.

“I’m scared,” she whispers with watery eyes.

I slide closer to her, pulling her into my lap so she’s only looking at me. “Do you want to go home?”

With a frustrated sigh, she says, “I don’t even know where that is anymore. You feel like home to me, Lane, but this trip keeps opening my eyes to things I never even considered.”

“I can make it better.”

“I’m not sure you can fix how I feel. I can’t even pinpoint one thing that’s wrong with me. I just know that I’m scared to let go of everything I have, but I’m even more afraid that I’ll lose you if I don’t. And after last night, when I thought I was losing my own life, I want to grab on to you even tighter and never let you go.”

Holding her close, the only sound I hear is the thumping of her heart against my chest. I rest my chin on top of her head, wanting her to be so consumed by me that the war raging inside her disappears. “We can face reality another day.”

“Nothing will change unless I do.”

It breaks me seeing her so worked up about something that shouldn’t be this hard. It should be easy to love each other without either of us having to give up what else we love. And maybe that’s the problem. Maybe I’m expecting my life to stay exactly how it is because of the band’s success. But that’s not fair to her—she’s successful in her own right, doing what she loves, too. “I wish I knew what to say to make you happy.”

“I am happy, Lane. I love you.”

The limo pulls into the parking lot of Lola’s and she starts climbing off my lap. I’m not ready to let her go, so I hold onto her waist a little tighter, needing us to be okay before we leave the car. “What do you need me to do, Noelle?”

She bites her lip and stares down at me. “I want you to remember what you have before you go in there.”

“Baby, I don’t even want to be here. Nothing on that stage will come close to what I have in my arms right now. You’re my girl, Noelle.”

“You’re my guy,” she whispers. And then like the moment never happened, she gives me a smile so bright, I’d fall on my ass if I weren’t sitting down. “Let’s go have some fun.”

I watch as Noelle walks arm in arm with Lark and Gina, the three of them laughing as they head toward the new theater next to Lola’s. Reed lingers behind them, our only layer of protection while we’re apart.

Easton clasps my shoulder and smiles. “She’ll be fine, man. Let her spread her wings a little.”

“It’s not her wings I’m worried about,” I tell him. “It’s her heart.”

“Fair enough,” he says as he leads us to the entrance. “Maybe some tits will cheer you up.”

“You’re way too into this. This kid has you all worked up.”

“I’m so fucked, Lane. I’ve never even changed a diaper. And what if it’s a damn girl? She’ll look like her mother, and then I’ll be even more fucked.”

“Diapers aren’t hard. You’ll figure it out.”

“How do you know so much? Lark’s looking into baby classes. Can you even imagine me playing with dolls?”

“It might do you some good.” I almost wish they’d offer Easton a reality show so the first few months were documented for the world to see. It’s not that he’s incapable of parenting; it’s that he’s clueless about where to start.

“How do you know so much?”

“I read,” I tell him as we flash our IDs at the door to Lola’s.

“What do you read?
Ladies Home Journal
? I know for a fact that shit’s not in
Cosmo
.”

“One, how do you know about
Ladies Home Journal
? Two, why wouldn’t it be in
Cosmo
?”

“Because Lark gets that one. I steal it when I’m in the shitter.”

“Then by all means, please tell us why skipping breakfast makes us gain weight, or maybe how we can control those cramps.”

He shoves me against the wall, shaking his head as he laughs. “You’re such an ass. There’s way more in the magazine than that shit.”

“You’re right, I forgot the quizzes. Tell me which Starbucks drink I’d be.”

This time, he smacks me on the back of the head like Lark’s always doing to him. It’s a wonder he doesn’t have brain damage with all the stupid shit that comes out of his mouth. Though he’s completely serious when he says, “Cut the shit or I’m sending you a subscription for Christmas.”

“I’d really prefer
Ladies Home Journal
. I’m a sucker for all those recipes.”

Dom hands us both a beer, even though it’s his birthday and we’re supposed to be buying. “Are you two done acting like princesses?”

We’re both stunned to silence when Dom leads us to a table down front, exactly where I don’t want to be. While their eyes are transfixed on the stage, their commentary is just as colorful. I’m sitting all of ten minutes, not even watching what’s going on in front of me, when I hear the song. The song that turned Lola’s into complete chaos the last time I was here.

Even though it kills me to watch, I raise my head to look at the stage. Just like before, she walks onto the stage with a halo on top of her head, her body draped in white silk fabric as a fog machine makes it look like she’s falling from Heaven straight into Hell.