Rock Steady (30 page)

She was losing it. In some corner of her mind, she realized he was jealous and lashing out at her. Jewel turned on her heel and headed down the hallway, away from the suite she shared with him. She ended up in a conference room, reaching for the sliding glass door and pulling it open for air.

She needed air!

It was just a misunderstanding.

Like hell. It was an epic failure on his part not to trust her. Her phone buzzed, and she reached for it. Her mother’s number flashed on the screen. She opened the line, desperate for a distraction. She didn’t want to face the fight she was having or its destructive implications. Suddenly, all of the confidence she’d had in her relationship with him went dead like a jet engine that just stopped in midair.

Just falling, and all the time, she was aware of her impending death when she hit the ground.

Ramsey was suddenly there, pulling the phone out of her hand. “Whoever it is, they can fucking wait.”

He punched the power button on the phone, killing it completely, and dropped it into a chair.

“That was my mom.”

He froze, her statement impacting and making it through the haze of jealousy holding him in its grip.

“And we are not talking about this now.” She held a hand up between them. “I am way too pissed off and you’re…” Words failed her.

“I’m jealous,” he confirmed. “Aren’t you happy?”

“What?” she asked in a hollow whisper. “How could I be happy to see that you don’t trust me?”

“Morcant isn’t just anyone,” Ramsey continued. “The guy could charm the habit off a nun.”

“Oh…so I’m expected to understand when I come out of a restroom and find you lying across a bunch of pillows and kissing someone, but how dare I have a dinner meeting with a man who is equally as attractive as Vicky?”

“Someone said you gave him our new music piece.”

She felt like he’d punched her in the chest. Her heart just stopped between beats. “How can you even say that to me?”

The other members of the band were in the doorway. “I would have walked out of the meeting if he’d even asked!”

“I had to bring it up, because someone told Sammy about your meeting with Quinn.”

His face was red, but she interrupted him before he got out his next argument.

“That is such lame logic. You should be smart enough to realize Tia is just trying to clear me out of her way,” she said. “We need some space to cool off.”

“Agreed.” Syon was suddenly there, along with the other members of Toxsin. Ramsey snorted, but realized he wasn’t going to win. In some corner of her mind, Jewel discovered herself admiring the way the members of the band came together to help one another. Taz and Syon were muscling Ramsey out of the room, while Drake offered her a key card and gently guided her down a different hallway.

“I’m fine,” she informed him, and swallowed when she realized how sharp her tone was. “Really. Thanks for the key card. I’ll be fine.”

Kate was hovering as well, considering her with a critical look before nodding. “Give me a ring if you don’t want to drink alone.”

“Yeah.” Jewel slid the key card through the slot and pushed in the door. Inside the room, there was blissful privacy, but it rang with a silence that was nearly deafening.

She sank down onto the bed, reeling from the way life had turned a full one-eighty on her in less than the space of a day. She was back to being on her own, and the reality of it was overwhelming.

And too painful to face. She lay back as she lost her battle against her tears. They slid down the sides of her face as she felt the flames consuming the wreckage of her relationship with Ramsey.

He didn’t trust her.

Didn’t see her as anything but an ornament decorating his life.

Maybe they could come back from the trust issue. It could be excused by the newness of their relationship.

But she had to be her own person.

Knew it and felt it burning in her gut so badly, there was no way she was going to abandon her art. She’d know she was a sellout, and someday Ramsey would see it too.

Tia would end up calling things right.

He’d leave her because she wasn’t his partner. Loving someone meant taking them the way they were. Not trying to change them. But true relationships needed to be balanced. She couldn’t be his poor, rescued, starving artist forever.

Which sucked on an epic scale, because she loved him.

* * *

“Getting drunk isn’t the answer,” Taz said.

Ramsey wiped his mouth on the back of his hand, an empty bottle already sitting on the table beside him. “Last time you saw Joi, it worked for you.”

“The difference is, Joi refused to leave that restaurant with me,” Taz countered as Ramsey tipped the beer bottle back and drained it. “Jewel is here, and smart enough to know when to walk away and let both your tempers cool off.”

“So…I’m chillin’.” Ramsey chucked the bottle in the direction of the trash can. “Get lost. I’m a big boy.”

“You’re a big something,” Taz said without moving off the sofa. “But I’m staying. Team code. When one of us gets drunk, he gets a wingman.”

Ramsey flopped back onto the floor, staring up at the ceiling as the alcohol numbed his brain. He shouldn’t have guzzled it. That was his last clear thought before it stole his wits, leaving him prey to the regrets his temper had shielded him from, and too intoxicated to physically do anything about it. Like get his ass down the hall and beg Jewel to forgive him.

“I’m an asshole,” Ramsey informed the ceiling.

“No argument.”

“I need to tell Jewel,” he said as his words slurred.

“When you sober up,” Taz replied.

Ramsey rolled onto his side. “It was only a couple of beers.” But the room was spinning.

“And two shots of rye,” Taz enlightened him. “Only place you’re going is to the throne room.”

“I never puke.”

But an hour later, he wished he had. The room spun, and his belly knotted from the poison he’d ingested. The thing that tormented him the most was the fact that he was helpless to remedy his actions while his system was dealing with the alcohol.

“Tomorrow, I’m going on the wagon,” he informed Taz.

“Told you, Jewel is good for you.”

“Yeah,” he agreed. “Got…got to straighten up.” Ramsey turned onto his side and tried to fix his gaze on Taz. “Kick my ass…if I mess up?”

Taz slowly smiled. “You got it.”

“Thanks.”

Jewel deserved better from him, and he was going to make sure she got it.

* * *

The phone in her room rang at two in the morning. Jewel woke with a start, fumbling for the receiver in the dark.

“Hello?”

“Ms. Ryan?” someone far less groggy asked on the other end of the line.

“Yes.” She rubbed her eyes and squinted at the bedside clock. Yup, it was two in the morning.

“This is the front desk. Could you come down to the lobby please?”

“Huh?” she asked.

“I am sorry, but there seems to be some concern over your well-being, and I would like to maintain the privacy of the top floor.” The manager sounded stressed beyond his limits. “There is someone here claiming to be your mother, and she is insisting on seeing you, or she intends to call the police to investigate the matter.”

“My mom?” Jewel asked as her brain started to function. “I’ll be right down.”

Jewel was suddenly wide-awake, the severed phone call clear in her mind. She was a rotten daughter for not making sure her mom wasn’t worried about her. She flipped on the light in the bathroom and wiped her face with a washcloth before dragging a brush through her hair a few times.

She felt the tension the moment she got out of the elevator in the lobby. There were four members of hotel security standing near the front desk, clearly trying to keep someone there. There was a very familiar sounding “harrumph” before her mother pushed through them.

“Mom, what are you doing here?” Jewel asked, even though she already knew the answer.

Her mother stopped two paces in front of her and propped her hands on her hips as she scanned her from head to toe with a knowing eye. “Being your mother.”

The security force was still standing in place, the manager wringing his hands. “We’re good,” Jewel said.

The manager didn’t look appeased.

“Don’t placate him,” her mother said. “He’s just worried his rock star guests will have a problem with me showing up to keep them from abusing my daughter.”

“I’m not being abused,” Jewel insisted.

“Well then, you can explain why someone cut off a call, and you didn’t answer when I called back.” Her mom was in full mother-hen form. “You know my feelings on oppressive relationships.”

“Yeah…” Jewel reached out and hugged her mom. “I’m fine, and I’m so sorry I didn’t call you back. I fell asleep.”

Her mother pegged her with a knowing look. “Fell asleep crying.”

Jewel didn’t bother to lie. Her puffy eyes betrayed her anyway. Her mother suddenly abandoned her defensive mode in favor of being the compassionate shoulder Jewel desperately needed. “Come here and tell me what happened.”

Jewel indulged in a long hug, but pushed away when tears flooded her eyes. “I can’t. Not just now. I need to sort out my feelings.”

Her mother made a low sound under her breath. “Well then, are you coming home with me? No better place to think things through.”

It was a good idea.

And yet, it filled her eyes with fresh tears. Jewel blinked them away as she tried to get a grip on her emotions. Her mother made a low sound under her breath.

“Come on,” her mother said in a firm yet understanding tone.

Jewel let her mom take over. She knew she was being a coward, but the wounds on her heart were just too fresh for her to do anything but stumble through life. She didn’t want to see the suspicion on the band’s faces. Not on the men she’d come to think of as friends.

But what she really wanted to escape from was Ramsey. She was being a chickenshit. Sure. She knew it, freely admitted it. The reason she followed her mother out of the hotel was that she just couldn’t lose what was left of herself. If she saw Ramsey, she’d fold, like she always did. He’d overwhelm her, and she’d talk herself into making it work. Every relationship called for compromises.

It was that idea of compromise that had her sliding into the front passenger seat of her mom’s car and pulling on her seat belt.

Ramsey deserved better.

So did she.

Sure, it might work for a while. While the sex was hot enough to overpower everything else. But the day would come when passion wasn’t enough, and they had to face each other as partners. That was when it would all crumble, because she hadn’t been strong enough to become her own person. Ramsey deserved that in a partner, and she wasn’t going to be the one to disappoint him.

Even if it meant walking away.

* * *

He stank.

Ramsey groaned and squinted at the morning light, and he was forced to notice just how much he reeked. Taz was punching the keys of his laptop as he scowled at an online game. His headphones might have led some people to think he wasn’t aware of what was going on around him, but Ramsey knew his bandmate better.

And there was no way he was going to get so lucky as to escape having a witness to his stupidity.

Ramsey climbed to his feet and went toward the bathroom. He flipped on the water and stripped out of his pants. The dragon tattoo sent a prick of pain through him, as well as remorse.

He really needed to stop being a dick.

As in, immediately.

The water was still cold, but he walked beneath the showerhead and let it shock him. His brain was clearing, allowing him to think.

And he had a lot to think about.

Or in this case, plan.

By the time he finished dealing with his stubble-covered chin, he was grinning. Jewel was about to discover just what happened when she got what she wished for.

Because he was going to be the man she thought he was.

* * *

“Open it,” Ramsey hissed through his teeth.

Brenton eyed him dubiously.

“Are we rolling out of here in an hour?” Ramsey supported his demand with fact. His fist was still resting on the door to Jewel’s room. He hammered the wood again, but there was still no answer.

“We are,” Brenton confirmed as he produced a master key card and slid it into the door. Ramsey took over, pushing the door in.

“Jewel?”

It took exactly sixty seconds to confirm she wasn’t in the room. His stomach dropped. The bed was messed up, but there wasn’t a single other sign of Jewel having been there.

“Steven!”

The bodyguard yanked his door open, wearing nothing but a pair of pants. He was looking at his phone. “She’s in the conference room. East corner.”

Ramsey felt a flash of relief, followed by an intense twist of dread. His head might be splitting with a hangover, but his brain was working just fine. The memory of tossing her phone onto a chair was crystal clear and chilled his blood.

“Shit!” he cursed as he found the phone. Steven was on his heels, buttoning a shirt.

“Oh, crap,” the bodyguard agreed. He was in motion immediately, dialing the security center of the hotel.

Ramsey swept the screen of the phone and used his own fingerprint to unlock the screen. Jewel was going to have something to say about him putting himself as second security protocol on her phone, but he didn’t care, so long as she said it to him. Profanity, anger, just something to prove he hadn’t screwed up so badly she was giving up on him.

The ten calls from her mother were blinking, along with several text messages.

“Her mother was here.”

Ramsey and Steven spoke at the same time.

“Oh, man, you hung up on her mother last night,” Taz said from the doorway.

“And she left the phone in here when she needed to get away from me,” Ramsey finished.

“The manager says her mom showed up around two, threatened to call the local cops if her daughter wasn’t allowed to leave,” Steven filled them in.

“Why the fuck didn’t that manager call up here?” Ramsey demanded. It was a ridiculous demand; he recognized it the moment the words were out of his mouth.