Rock My Christmas (FlameSmith in Love Book 1) (13 page)

She hung suspended in time, in bliss, with Burn’s name screaming in her voice throughout the universe. Then she reassembled on a gasping inhale.

“Kendel, my God. Fuccckkk!” He went rigid, and she felt him buck inside her. Then he folded atop her.

His arms came around her, and he placed a soft kiss on her nape.

“Burn?” she said, unsure.

“Gorgeous, you rock my world.”

“You rock my Christmas.”

Chuckling, he withdrew and urged her onto the bed. He joined her a moment later and gathered her close.

He still smelled good, his cologne having somehow managed to last through the night and two rounds of intercourse.

Snuggling closer, she closed her eyes and said, “I’m sure you say that to all the girls.”

“Kendel,” he said in a quiet, deep voice. “I’ve never said that to anyone in my life.”

Chapter Nineteen

“Kendel, wake up.” Burn rubbed a towel on his freshly washed hair and shook her shoulder. She looked so delicious he wanted to take her again, but she needed time to recover.

The scent of sex hung thick in the air of her room, and he smiled. With Alexandria and Wendy, he’d been drunk, high, or both when it came to getting nasty. Probably why he’d considered it nasty. Kendel, however, made sex beautiful. He’d never had better, and he suspected intimacy with anyone else would never compare.

Down the hall, his phone pinged, and he left her to check his text. Jay had issued an invitation to Christmas brunch, and he’d accepted. In his room, his phone showed Jay’s response. He and Kendel needed to arrive at the drummer’s house in an hour and bring orange juice.

He chose a pair of boxer briefs from his dresser and returned to her room. She sat on one hip, her legs folded and the sheet covering only her breasts. Her hair appeared a little wild, proof he’d had his hands in it more than a few times, and her eyes had a lazy, sleepy quality.

Sensuality emanated from her like a beacon he couldn’t resist. Tossing his underwear at the foot of the bed as he passed, he went to her. He bent and kissed her, adoring the sweet smell of sleep that clung to her skin.

Her tongue touched his lips, requesting entry, at the same time her fingers curled around him. He inhaled a surprised breath as she created a pull of need in his loins. Parting his lips, he let her in. Their tongues began a stroking, rhythmic dance as her hand worked him to hardness.

He couldn’t deny her silent request. Breaking the kiss, he slid his fingers into her folds and found her swollen and wet. “We’re going to have to make it quick.”

“Just make it now,” she said, a seductive, needy glimmer in her large eyes.

Reluctantly, he pulled free of her hand and located the box of condoms. While he donned one, she settled back, spread her bent legs and held out her arms in welcome. Damn, the woman was sexy.

He crawled into position and entered her tight heat as she lifted and met him in a kiss. Her arms and legs entwined him. Her hips rose to match his increasing thrusts.

As they worked harder and faster, his pleasure climbing and the pressure building, he fought for breath. He had to end the kiss.

Her eyes met his, holding his gaze as her walls tightened around him. She parted her luscious lips on a silent cry, and her eyes went liquid.

On his elbows, he cupped her lovely face and surrendered to an overwhelming desire to let her absorb him. Every part of him. Her passage convulsed along his length, causing him to come with her, but he never lost eye contact with her. Even as his spine stiffened upon his explosive release. Her features reflected the pleasure-pain and effort of her own. Then he relaxed, and she closed her eyes.

The profound connection shook him, and he let her hold him until his breathing lessened and his heart slowed. Then it hit him.

For the first time, he’d made love.

*    *    *

Burn glanced at Kendel for the third time without saying anything, and it unnerved her. She gathered her still damp hair and twisted it over her shoulder. Readjusting the bag with a jug of orange juice between her feet, she asked, “Is there something on your mind?”

“No.” The light they approached turned yellow, and he accelerated through.

“Have I wished you a Merry Christmas today?”

A slow grin lifted the grim lines of his face. “Four times. Once in the kitchen and thrice in your bedroom.”

The memory of their Christmas activities started a dull throb of excitement, and she smiled. Would he always have her in a near state of readiness?

The direction of her thoughts stripped the smile from her. When had she begun planning a future with this man? Why would she? He didn’t fit in her dream. He couldn’t give her the security and stability she needed.

Sadness settled a lead weight into her chest, and she filled her lungs on a shaky breath, shifting her gaze out the window.

He drove them into the hills past huge mansions elaborately decorated for the holidays. At an iron gate, he entered a code then pulled onto an ochre-colored cobblestone courtyard and parked next to a water fountain at the center. She counted ten other cars and a motorcycle parked around the courtyard.

“You’re late,” said a slightly heavy and very curvaceous blonde who came from the house, her British accent thick. She met them halfway and hugged Burn. She took the orange juice from Kendel. “I’m Celeste, Jay’s wife. You must be Kendel. Come on in. We’re just now sitting down to eat.”

Inside, the young boy from Jay’s pictures ran in a happy circle then deeper into the house, shouting, “Kendel’s here! Burn’s here! Kendel’s here!”

Kendel smiled. “His name is Dale, right? He’s six? Your husband showed me pictures of him while we toured in Korea. He’s a good-looking boy.”

Celeste smiled and nodded then led the way through a large kitchen cluttered with evidence of a meal recently prepared. “We heard all about how you punched that snake in Korea. I think you’re his new hero. I think you’re everyone’s hero. How’s your hand?”

“Better, thanks.” It made her uncomfortable that they lauded her attack on that photographer. She’d acted in the heat of the moment and would certainly handle it differently given another chance. She gained no pride or satisfaction from her actions.

As if sensing her unease, Burn grazed fingertips between her shoulder blades. “Celeste, did you and Jay receive a call this morning from V’s da?”

She appeared almost stern. “We did. It’s past time for V to get clean. We’re in total support. How about you?”

He nodded, his mouth tense. “He’s on a self-destruct, and it has to stop. I told him that if V refuses to enter rehabilitation or checks out early, we’ll cancel the spring tour. This needs to happen.”

“We’re unanimous then. Good.” Celeste brushed a curl off Kendel’s shoulder. “You really have such pretty hair.”

She ran a self-conscious hand down the red polyester blouse and black pencil skirt from her business suit. Hopefully the red pumps she still had from last night’s party made her appear less stuffy. She eyed Burn’s black leather pants and black button-down under his black blazer then Celeste’s white lace dress. She held her breath.

Past the kitchen, conversation and laughter filled a long dining room. At least thirty people, some she recognized, sat at an impossibly long table laden with food.

“Kendel!” Air called and stood. He waved a paper. “You made the cover of yesterday’s Rag Chat. Check it out.”

She let him hand her the paper, which featured a photo of her coming at the photographer’s camera, fist raised. Burn and Dan both appeared in the background. The caption read,
Burn Shatterly’s newest lover out of control.

“It’s not true,” she said. Or, at least it wasn’t true at the time.

Her dismay must’ve translated into her expression because the room quieted.

“These stories are rarely true,” said Celeste, placing the orange juice next to a platter of various meats wrapped around a creamy white cheese.

“I think it’s cool,” said Dale, earning chuckles.

Jay waved them to two empty seats across from him. “Come join us. Don’t take it so hard. It’s codswollop. Everybody knows that.”

When Celeste settled to a chair between Jay and Dale, the boy climbed to his knees atop his chair cushion, a stricken look turning his innocent face comical. “No fair! I wanted Kendel to sit next to me.”

His mother shushed him and helped him sit properly.

Under the table, Burn took Kendel’s hand. Everyone’s joy and welcome in combination with his quiet support had her near to tears. She had always wanted friends like this. The kind of friendships that formed a sort of family where acceptance and open affection ruled. These people inspired a sense of closeness in her.

But these weren’t her friends. This wasn’t her family. This was the end to a job that had only lasted a week, and a once-in-a-lifetime fling that would only last a day.

Teasing and talk resumed as they began passing dishes and filling their plates. She tried to ignore the lode in her chest, but its weight refused to let her enjoy the moment. It irked her. She hadn’t intended to spend Christmas depressed. She didn’t want regrets.

After the meal, Air’s fiancée took her hand and led her to a pretty grassy area next to a swimming pool. They sat on lawn chairs and stared at ripples on the pool’s surface formed by a warm breeze.

“Doesn’t feel like Christmas, does it?” asked the woman.

“It really doesn’t. I’m from Indiana. I’m used to cold.”

The woman chortled. “I’m from New York. I’ve been here six years, and I don’t think I’ll ever get used to sunny, warm Christmases.”

Kendel studied her a moment. Air’s fiancée looked like a runway model – tall, more body in her black hair than on her bones, and the face of an angel. Her casual charm and down-to-earth manner made her approachable, however. Air had chosen a good woman.

“Whatever you’re doing with Burn, keep it up. I watched Alexandria then Wendy destroy him, and the complete asshole he became. He’s clean now, and with you, he looks happier than I’ve ever seen him.”

“Who says I’m anything more than his personal assistant?”

The woman smiled. “He constantly has a hand on you. He scooted his chair closer to yours. He hardly looks at anyone else. No way you’re just his assistant.”

The weight in her chest expanded. “Do you think maybe he’s just got bad taste in women?”

He’d chosen Kendel, after all, and she used him as much as his ex-girlfriends. Maybe not in the same way, but she’d lie if she didn’t admit she’d taken the job solely for the travel and experience. She’d slept with him to avoid later regrets. Though now she feared she had a whole new set of regrets – the very kind she’d dreaded.

“Maybe he
had
bad taste,” said the woman. “He’s got you, doesn’t he? So I’d say he’s now got the best.”

*    *    *

Kendel’s quiet bothered Burn. She didn’t say a word the entire drive home, and once inside, she’d simply kissed his cheek then went to change. He’d tried to warn her she’d appear in the tabloids.

He went to her room and leaned on the doorframe as she stood in pale pink bra and panties, neatly folding her clothes. “It could be worse, you know. The story could’ve made the news.”

Not sparing him a glance, she went to her closet and wheeled out one of her large suitcases. His heart skipped a beat.

“Going somewhere?” he asked, glad he’d managed to sound light. “I know Dan promised we’d find you an apartment, but Christmas Day isn’t a good time to search. Besides, I’d just as soon have you stay here.”

“I’m not your assistant anymore.”

He went in and sat on the bed’s edge, flipping closed her suitcase lid as soon as she opened it. “No. You’re infinitely dearer to me.”

A single tear dripped from the corner of her eye. He shot to his feet, alarmed. His instinct pieced her words and demeanor together, and he didn’t like what it told him.

She shook her head. “Don’t you see? I don’t want to be dear to you. I don’t want you to be dear to me. I meant it when I said we’re not meant for each other.”

He took a step toward her, his heart plummeting into his stomach. “Then what was last night and this morning?”

“It was supposed to be just sex. I never
ever
wanted to hurt you. You’ve seen enough to last a lifetime. And I made up my mind not to love you.” Her voice broke on a sob as she said, “But I feel like my heart is breaking.”

As he embraced her and tried to absorb the tremors of her weeping, he didn’t know whether to give in to anger or despair. He whispered, “I’ve only just found you, Kendel.”

“I should never have taken this job. And I definitely shouldn’t have given in to you last night.”

He held her tighter and closed his eyes. “Don’t say that. I thought I was ruined to bitterness, but you proved me wrong. I needed you before you took this job. Hell, I needed you a year ago. I need you now more than ever. Have I nothing to offer that you want?”

She wiped her eyes then wrapped her arms around him. “I wish you did.”