Rock and a Hard Place (19 page)

Peter drew in a breath and released it. He
looked thoughtful for a moment then began to play. At first his
fingers barely touched the keys. A beautiful melody rose from the
piano. The room quieted as he artfully mastered the instrument.

Karen watched him transform before her. He
became one with the music, and it warmed her soul. His body moved
gently as he played, lost to the world around him. She recognized
the tune, but couldn’t place it. It wasn’t from anything they’d
ever recorded or practiced together, yet the tender piece touched
her with its beauty and the loving way he performed.

Even the young kids in the room snuggled in
with their parents as Peter’s playing built in strength and power.
His hands moved over the keyboard effortlessly. The instrument
became an extension of him. Grandma watched and listened, pride
beaming on her aged face. Karen noticed Carly sitting alone on the
love seat in obvious awe.

When Karen looked at Peter again, sadness
filled his eyes. Now she recognized the melody. This was the song
he wrote for Libby, “Angel Kisses”. The energy of the music
intensified as the angst of the tune built and Peter laid bare his
broken heart. Karen bit the edge of her lip. Music is what feelings
sound like. As she watched her beautiful son, she could see how
deeply he loved Libby and that every note of music written was for
her.

She glanced at her husband who shared a
concerned look. This was no simple crush that would easily pass.
Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to get Peter together with Libby for just a
day before they left for Europe.

The beautiful music slowed and returned to
the beginning melody. Peter’s emotion filled the room. He was a
master at moving an audience. When his long fingers struck the
final chord, his head dropped to his chest. First the room echoed
in silence, and then burst with applause.

Peter reached up and brushed away a single
tear.

Little Ryan turned to him mother. “Why’s
Peter crying?” he asked.

Carly looked despondent on the love seat,
her joy and awe, replaced by reality.

Peter’s heart was already taken.

Chapter 18

Libby stepped quietly through the door of
the Milwaukee group home. Could she be lucky enough that her
housemates would be asleep?

“
Yo, girl. You got me
anything good tonight?” Darnell, a tall skinny black kid, asked
from the couch where he lay watching a reality show featuring
rappers and drug dealers.

“
This is all they had
left.” She tossed him a white take out-bag. “Maybe there’ll be
extras from the fish fry tomorrow.”

Days after arriving at the group home, Libby
got a job working at a restaurant in the mall. If she was going to
be stuck living in this hell hole, she planned to avoid it as much
as possible. Only two weeks passed since her arrival on
Thanksgiving Day. It felt like months.

“
Hot damn, you done nice
girl, but where’s my rings?” Darnell stuffed a handful of fries in
his mouth. He ate constantly, but was the skinniest guy she’d ever
seen. The first time she laid eyes on him she’d been terrified of
his gangster appearance--baggy pants, metal chains and mega
attitude. Now she knew his image was mostly an act, probably for
survival’s sake. He talked smack but so far was
harmless.

“
Sorry, no onion rings
tonight. Maybe next time.” In an effort to blend in and not make
enemies, Libby always brought back leftovers from work.

She walked down the hallway, her grip on her
bag tightened like a vise as she approached the bedroom. Silently,
she opened the door to the room she shared with Juanita, a volatile
psychopath, whose single goal in life was to terrorize Libby; and
Kelly, a pale girl who dyed her hair the color of death, wore dark
eye makeup and dressed in black. Juanita sat on her messy bed
sheets cleaning her fingernails with a switchblade as she rocked to
an iPod. Kelly slept soundly in her depressed state.

Ignoring Juanita, Libby went straight to her
side of the room. She grabbed her shower stuff. Living at the home
was a cross between a college dorm and juvenile hall. You kept your
stuff to yourself. You didn’t share, and stealing was a common
occurrence. Libby’s things disappeared on a regular basis. Within
hours of her arrival and Thanksgiving Day the phone Peter gave her
was gone, her last tie to him permanently cut. She’d bet money
Juanita was the klepto. She kept her money with her everywhere she
went, including the shower.

She grabbed a long t-shirt to sleep in and
padded to the door. A swish and then thud rang in her ear. Libby
froze. Juanita’s knife stuck in the wall just inches from her face.
She held her breath, afraid to turn around.

“
Hey blondie, what’s the
big hurry? Ain’t ya gonna say hi?” Juanita lounged against the
headboard, a snarl on her face.

Libby ran out of the room. At least she knew
the knife was in the wall and couldn’t hurt her. Juanita’s cruel
laughter followed down the hall.

Inside the bathroom, she locked the door and
rested her head against it. Her hand gripped the door knob until
she could breathe again. She hated that girl. Her mom always said
it was wrong to hate, that everyone had good in them. But Mom never
met Juanita.

She closed the lid to the toilet. The boys
always left it up. She sat down and took a few moments to pull
herself together, but it was getting harder. It took her all just
to survive.

Scott, the leader of the group home, was
nice enough, but he didn’t have a clue what went on. He was all
‘peace out and love your neighbor.’ Why a pacifist wanted a job
surrounded by teenage derelicts she couldn’t imagine. His easygoing
manner kept the kids a little less stressed, but he did a lousy job
with behavior management.

She looked around the small bathroom. In
here she was safe from hassle, in the only spot she could be alone.
Before she took her shower, she grabbed cleaning supplies from
under the sink and gave the room a quick once over. Everything in
her world was a mess. At least she could shower in a bathroom that
didn’t have smears on the mirror and the guys’ whiskers all over
the sink. In a couple of minutes, the bathroom countertop and
mirror were clean and smelled like lemons.

Libby inhaled deeply, and released some of
her stress. She turned on the shower and organized her stuff,
pretending it was her own private place that no one would invade or
touch. After folding her work clothes, she stepped under the weak
shower pressure and let warm water roll over her body. She tried to
imagine she was in a magical place under a waterfall instead of
this hell hole.

She stood under the flow long after she was
clean, wishing she could wash away the reality of her world. Her
thoughts turned to Peter; she missed him so much. At least she
didn’t cry each time she thought of him anymore. She tried to call
him from the group home phone as soon as she arrived. She needed to
make sure Garrett wasn’t pulling a cruel joke, but Peter’s cell
number wasn’t in service. He must have changed his number to keep
her away. She even called his record company, but couldn’t get past
the operator. Peter was now a part of her past, like every other
happy part of life. No knight in shining armor for Libby.

The water turned cool. She stepped out and
dressed for bed. With wet hair hanging down her back and her arms
filled, she left the security of the bathroom to return to
hell.

Halfway down the hall, a door opened and BJ,
a teenager the size of a linebacker, stepped out and blocked her
way.

Shit.

BJ was in for sexually assaulting a teacher.
His parents had money so his high priced lawyers were able to
convince the judge to prosecute him as a minor, even though BJ
looked more like thirty than seventeen. He scared the hell out of
her.

“
I thought I heard the
shower going and hoped it was you. You’re always up late working
hard. You need to relax. In fact, why don’t you join me and I can
help.” He winked as if she agreed he was a great catch.

Libby bit the inside of her cheek. There was
no good way to answer BJ, and there was no way she was stepping
inside his room.

“
What’s the matter? You
scared? You don’t need to be scared of me. I’ll be real gentle.” BJ
walked toward her, put his mammoth arms against the wall and leaned
over her. He took a lock of damp hair that hung over her shoulder
and sniffed. “You smell real good. I could just eat you
up.”

Libby’s stomach churned as she gripped her
clothes and towel. She could turn around and run back to the
bathroom. Or scream and hope Scott heard and would come to her
rescue. But his room was on the other end of the house and he slept
to the hum of a fan.

Before she decided what to do, Darnell came
strutting down the hallway.

“
Hey man, waz up? You guys
having a party and didn’t invite me?”

BJ glared at him sending a message of cease
and desist, but Darnell ignored him.

“
I’d love to join ya, but
I’s need my beauty sleep. Now if you’ll excuse me, I be on my
way.”

BJ stepped aside to let Darnell by. Darnell
pushed Libby through the quick opening and toward her bedroom door
before BJ realized what happened.

“
Ladies first, don’t you
have some big test tomorrow or something? You shouldn’t stay up so
late.” Darnell said with a pointed look at Libby.

Libby quickly entered her shadowed bedroom
and mouthed the words ‘thank you’ so BJ wouldn’t hear. Tomorrow
she’d bring onion rings home even if she had to pay for them
herself. Inside the room the street light outside illuminated the
space. Juanita slept on her back, her mouth open, as tunes from her
iPod blared in her ears. Relieved, Libby put her stuff away and
climbed into the lumpy bed.

Two close calls in one night; she wished she
had the guts to run away, but there was nowhere to go. Darnell told
her plenty of kids ran away and the authorities were too backlogged
to care or go after them. She asked why kids stayed; he said most
stayed either to pay their dues for their crimes or because it was
a warm bed and three squares a day. For Darnell, she believed he
lived a safer life here than on the streets.

She fell asleep wishing she and Peter had
runaway together when he first suggested it.

# # #

“
Peter?”

“
Yeah, Mom,” he walked to
the side of stage.

“
Let’s go talk in the
dressing room.” She wanted to break it to him gently, privately,
but he wouldn’t follow. Peter knew it was about Libby.

“
What? You found her? Where
is she?” His eyes grew wide with excitement.

“
It’s a long story.” It
hurt to see his enthusiasm.

“
Tell me,” he said, eager
for news.

Karen glanced around. Adam and Garrett
watched from their places on stage. Crew members littered the arena
securing equipment and completing final security checks.

“
I’m sorry.” She tried to
hide her regret as this was not the news she’d hoped to
give.

“
What? What’d you find
out?” Peter demanded.

“
We tried to find her, but
she’s gone, honey. I’m so sorry.”

“
What do you mean gone?
Gone where?” Peter’s confusion broke her heart. He was too young to
feel such disappointment.

“
We don’t know,” she tried
to soothe him with words. “The authorities arrested her aunt for
selling drugs. The authorities couldn’t locate Libby’s father and
so they placed her in foster care.” She watched him closely. For
once his brothers stayed silent. Not a sound echoed in the arena as
the crew looked on.

“
How could they do that to
her?” He shoved his hands through his hair and locked his fingers
above his head, turning away to hide the anguish in his
eyes.

“
She tried to call
you.”

He turned back to her, hoping for better
news, as he fought back emotions.

“
Several times.” She
fumbled with some crumpled slips of paper. “The front office took
these. They’re dated a couple days after her aunt was arrested.”
Everyone in the arena witnessed his pain. If only she could have
told him in private. “We called the number, Peter. It belonged to a
pay phone at a mall in Milwaukee.”

As the bad news continued, Peter stood
paralyzed. His eyes became glassy as he fought back tears, each
piece of information worse. She could see the heavy weight of her
words bear down on him.

“
Libby must have waited for
hours. The last message said she was sorry.” Karen spoke softly. “I
can’t imagine why.” After all she learned about Libby’s situation,
it was obvious this girl needed someone to help her, not throw her
out into a world of more strangers and fear. She wanted to take the
lonely girl in and hug her as her own mother would have.

“
Can they find her? There
must be a record?” Peter’s voice broke, he turned away, his chest
rose with each breath.

“
We tried. They won’t
release the information. She’s a minor and under custody of the
state. It’s the law.”

“
This is shit!” He snapped,
and let his anger over power his pain. “Libby’s suppose to be at
home with her family enjoying life, not locked up in the foster
system.” Peter paced. “She’s too sweet and good.” He turned to her,
tears rolled down his face. “She has no one, Mom, no one,” his
words fell to a whisper. “I’m it. I was all she had and now she
thinks I abandoned her too!”