Rock 01 - FRET (9 page)

“I want the left side. Closer to the bathroom.”

“Whatever.”

~*~

I woke up in a sweat, clutching the sheet as if it were going to save me. I could almost smell the gasoline, the blood. I shivered and inhaled deeply. Strong arms wrapped around me and I blew out a relieved sigh. I wasn’t in the car. I was in Axel’s arms and he was soothing me with that wonderful voice. It made my toes curl.

“Shh. I’ve got you. You’re safe,” he whispered in my ear.

I burrowed into Axel’s neck and closed my eyes. I’d never felt more safe in my life. This man, the man assigned to protect me, brought out feelings in me I’ve never had. It wasn’t just how he looked. He was strong, but also compassionate. I had a hard time remembering that he killed people for a living.

How weird is that?

I nuzzled Axel’s neck and got a soft moan in return. Goose bumps broke out down my arms as Axel’s pulled me in even closer. I breathed him in, and the smell of soap and something uniquely Axel tickled my senses. My lips grazed his neck and his fingers dug into my hip. I arched into him, tipping my head back. Our eyes met and I saw the carnal need in his eyes.

In that instant, Axel released me and backed away. I felt the loss immediately.

“Axel?”

Axel got off the bed and stood a few feet away from me. I got up and came around the side of the bed.

“Don’t.” It was a quiet request.

“Don’t what?” I asked, approaching him slowly. He was shirtless. All that sexy exposed skin was mine for the touching. I stepped in front of him and placed a hand on his chest. His heart galloped under my touch.

“Don’t do this, Gareth. I can’t go there.”

“Why? I can see it in your eyes. You want me.”

“Of course I want you and I know I shouldn’t.
I can’t
.”

“But —”

“No buts. You have no idea who I am, Gareth. I’m a very dangerous man.” Axel took a few steps away from me. “I can’t do this with you. My job is to keep you alive. I can’t let what I’m feeling affect that.”

“But you do feel something for me.” I backed away as Axel groaned and held his head. “Maybe when this is all over —”

“No,” Axel ground out. “Not ever.”

My stomach plummeted and I nodded slowly. I went back to the bed and crawled under the covers. Axel came back to the bed and took a pillow; he settled on the floor.

“Goodnight, Gareth.”

I didn’t answer him.

The next few days were spent in almost silence. I answered Axel when he asked me a question. Other than that, I didn’t say shit. I was hurt and I know I had no right to be. The guy was doing his job. When he said nothing could ever come of us, even after the job, that kind of hurt.

Okay, it hurt a lot.

Axel spent most of his days at the unconventional house checking the area and making phone calls. He made good on his assertion that I needed to know how to use a gun. We went to a local range where Axel seemed to know the man who ran it. Hours later, he was comfortable that I not only knew how to handle a gun, but was able to use it fairly accurately. I was comfortable that I
could
do it; I was hoping I’d never have to.

Ransom called a few times and I assured him I was fine. He and the guys were goofing around together and I couldn’t begrudge him that. Another full moon was gracing the sky and I closed my eyes, letting the music from my headphones soothe me. Paul was still in Hawaii and surprised as fuck when I called him. He explained that he thought Ransom and I would freak out if we knew about the letters, so I was right in that aspect. After assuring Paul that I was okay and to have a good time, I hung up.

It was nearing midnight and I was still wide awake. Damn, I hated it when I couldn’t fucking fall asleep. I went to the bathroom and rummaged through the drawer. I found the bottle of pills Paul had given me in the back. I hate taking any kind of pills, but right now I just wanted some damn shuteye. I swallowed two of them and brushed my teeth.

My room was dark but I could see Axel’s form on the couch. His breathing suggested he was sleeping. I stood and watched him for a few minutes. If there was ever a guy for me, it was the one on my couch. One hand was behind his head, the other was on his stomach. I tilted my head, staring at the tattoo on his hip. Axel was just — well, he was Axel. I shook my head and crawled into bed with a sigh. Hopefully I would get some rest.

~*~

I came awake when Axel’s loud roar finally penetrated my senses. I was dangling over the side of the deck and Axel had a grip on my wrist.

“Gareth! Wake up!” Axel shouted.

“Holy shit!” I yelled.

“Grab my wrist, dammit!”

I swung my other arm up and grabbed his wrist. Axel pulled me up and over the rail and I fell on top of him on the deck.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Gareth! What the hell?” Axel got to his feet and pulled me up. Seconds later, he had me in a bone-crunching embrace.

“You scared the shit out of me!”

“I don’t…I don’t know what happened,” I stammered.

“I could have lost you!”

“I —”

I didn’t get anything else out because Axel’s lips crashed into mine.

Oh God. Gareth’s lips were so warm against mine and I held him as closely as I could. I inhaled sharply through my nose as Gareth’s mouth opened to mine on a whimper. I swept inside to taste him and groaned. I couldn’t stop touching him, kissing him. His skin was like silk under my fingers and I wanted him under me. Our lips moved against each other in harmony, hands aching to touch as much skin as possible. Gareth wrapped his arms around my neck and I picked him up, taking him back into the house.

His teeth nipped at my bottom lip and I sucked in his tongue. Gareth’s erection was against my stomach and I knew I was hard as a rock. I was kissing Gareth, I was all over him and I couldn’t stop. Our tongues tangled and Gareth moaned in my mouth as my hands gripped his ass. I carried him into the bedroom and went down on top of him on the bed. His legs wrapped around my hips as our tongues continued to do battle. Gareth’s hands held my face as he whimpered and moaned; his hips arched into mine.

I couldn’t get enough of him. I’d never wanted someone so badly in my entire existence. His skin, his lips, his eyes — everything about Gareth called to me and I wanted to answer him. I pulled his sweats down and gripped his rock hard dick. A long, drawn out moan left Gareth’s mouth and landed in mine. I pulled my dick out and wrapped my hand around both of us.

“Oh fuck…yes…” Gareth was all but sobbing.

My whole body shook as I jacked us off together. Gareth’s dick leaked precome like a geyser and I wasn’t much better. I was so fucking turned on I could barely breathe. And the kisses — oh fuck me, the kisses! I am so glad I never kissed anyone before Gareth, because it would have paled in comparison. We fit. Everything about us fit. Gareth is the one man who could change me forever — and that thought scares the fuck out of me.

“Axel…oh yes…
please
!”

I palmed Gareth’s nut and dragged my hand along our dicks in one deliberately slow sweep, squeezing his head against mine. Fireworks shot off behind my eyes as I came with a loud cry, my seed spilling all over Gareth’s chest. He went off seconds after me, his mouth open, eyes wide as he came and came and came. His body jerked as the aftershocks hit him in waves. I kept kissing him through it all because dammit, I couldn’t fucking stop. Gareth was panting beneath me and I threaded my free hand through his wet hair. I palmed his cheek and ran the pad of my thumb over his kiss-swollen lips. Jesus I’d never seen anyone as perfect as Gareth Wolf.

And I had just lost all perspective.

Fuck.

I almost hadn’t made it to him on time. The sound of the sliding glass door woke me up. The next thing I knew, Gareth was crawling over the side of the deck. I was off balance because things had gotten strained between us; we weren’t in sync as we had been lately. I wanted him, more than he could ever know. I wanted a life with him but he deserved so much better than what I had to offer.

“Axel?”

I kissed him softly. “You scared me.”

“I’m getting that idea.” Gareth smiled shyly.

“What were you doing?”

“I don’t know. I was in bed and the next thing I knew, you were pulling me up.”

“Do you normally sleepwalk?”

“No. Not that I know of.” Gareth’s face scrunched in thought. “I did take sleeping pills tonight, though.”

“Where are they?” I asked.

“In the bathroom. I don’t like taking pills, period, but I just needed to get some rest. The last few days …” Gareth trailed off and turned his head away from me.

“I know.” I turned his face back to mine gently. “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

“Well, you won’t do that again, will you?” Gareth tried to joke.

“Stay here. I’ll get something to clean us up and grab the pills.”

Gareth nodded and I moved slowly. His body displayed in the light of the moon would make grown men cry. Jesus, I was in so much trouble with this kid. I flicked the bathroom light on and grabbed a washcloth from the cupboard.

I checked the medicine cabinet for the pills, then the drawer. I found an orange pill bottle in the back and grabbed it. Gareth was still spread-eagle on the bed when I came back into the room. I handed him the washcloth and then turned on the bedside lamp. I inspected the bottle and then opened it, letting a few pills fall into my palm.

The sleeping pills were the kind you could only get with a doctor’s prescription. They were the ones with the crazy-ass side effects. I scowled and held up a pill.

“Where did these come from?”

“Paul gave them to me a while back. I couldn’t sleep and he said he could help. Why? What’s wrong with them?”

“I’m sure nothing is wrong with them. But when they’re taken by someone who never takes anything — well, let’s just say it could cause a problem. There’s a reason they tell people not to take someone else’s prescriptions.”

Gareth noticed my face and sat up. “Don’t even think that. Paul was just trying to help. You don’t know him like we do. He was the one who hired a bodyguard. We grew up together, Axel. He would never hurt me.”

“I can’t let anything happen to you. Do you understand that?”

“I know, I know,” Gareth huffed. “It’s your job.”

“I think it’s become a lot more than that, don’t you?” I lifted his face to mine gently. “I just broke every rule with you and I can’t seem to care.”

“Don’t tease me,” Gareth barely whispered.

“Come here,” I said quietly.

Gareth moved into me and I held him, running my nose through his hair and breathing him in. His hands spread across my back and he kissed my neck. I leaned back a bit and met his eyes. He was so vulnerable to me then, so open and honest.

“I don’t know what will happen between us, but I’m not leaving you until we catch whoever is doing this.”

Gareth nodded and snuggled into me. An ache began to form in my chest and I took a deep breath. If I had lost Gareth tonight, I don’t think I would have survived it. Somewhere along the way, the little shit had burrowed into my heart.

I’m pretty damned sure I’m going to keep him.

~*~

Mac called me in the morning with an update on the other guys. Nothing stood out. Well, at least nothing that I could see as a threat to Gareth. Mac had gotten the video from the L.A. concert and we both watched it repeatedly, but nothing stood out. I paced the kitchen with my coffee and phone as Mac babbled in my ear. Gareth was still sleeping and I wanted him to get as much rest as possible.

“That is fucked up!” Mac whistled in amazement at the story.

“You have no idea. Damn good thing I’m a light sleeper or he would have plummeted to the bottom of the ridge.”

“So the dad checks out, Stan checks out; you’re liking Paul for this aren’t you?”

“Am I that transparent?”

“No, you’re smart and your gut is almost never wrong.”

“Yeah, but he called you to protect Gareth. That’s what’s got me confused. This guy grew up with them, takes care of them and hired someone to make sure Gareth stays safe.”

“Maybe we need to dig a little more?” Mac suggested.

“I’m going to go through more of the letters. Stan was right, we need to go back and see if anything matches up to what we have now.”

“I’m going to come up and help,” Mac announced.

“You’re leaving your wife to come help?” I chuckled.

“She’s with her sister,” Mac grumbled.

“Oh, so the sister is visiting and now you
have
to come help me.”

“I’ll be there by tonight, asswipe.”

“Love you, Dad.”

“Fuck off.”

I hung up and turned to see Gareth behind me. His hair was sticking up adorably and he was wiping the sleep from his eyes. His sweats barely sat on his hips and his ratty T-shirt looked like a pack of wild dogs had attacked it.

“Dad?” Gareth asked inquisitively. “I thought he passed away?”

“He did. That was my boss, Mac. Seems his sister-in-law is visiting and now he can’t wait to get out here and help.”

“You guys are close?” Gareth walked to the coffeepot and poured himself a cup.

“Yes.”

Gareth turned and eyed me suspiciously over his coffee cup. “How close?”

I grinned and pulled him into my arms. I took his cup and placed it on the counter before I leaned in to kiss his neck. Gareth whimpered as I grabbed his ass in both hands.

“The only one I want to be close to is you,” I whispered in his ear.

“Holy fuck.”

I stiffened and raised my head to see Ransom standing in the doorway.

Shit and fuck me running.

“Is this why you wanted to bring him home? So you could fuck him?!” Ransom snarled, advancing on us. “I trusted you!”

Gareth stood in front of me and put a hand out to stop his brother. Ransom got in my face and I swear his eyes flared red.

“Ransom! Stop it!” Gareth shouted.

“You might want to back that shit off,” I said calmly.

“Or what?” Ransom snapped.

“I’m going to kick you in your fucking balls, Ransom!” Gareth yelled.

“My brother doesn’t need to be de-virginized and used by an asshole like you!”

“Oh. My. God!” Gareth rasped. “Did you have to go there?”

“I didn’t have sex with your brother, Ransom.” I tilted my head to the side in thought. “Well, what is your definition of sex? Is it penetration? Because if that’s it, then no. We did not have sex.”

“I’m going to fucking kill you!” Ransom thundered.

I sighed and crossed my arms.

“Ransom, please calm down,” Gareth pleaded. “Axel didn’t do anything to me that I didn’t want, okay? He saved me.”

That seemed to get through to Ransom and his face paled.

“What do you mean?”

“I couldn’t sleep last night so I took some sleeping pills. Turns out, they have some pretty freaky side effects. Axel found me hanging off the side of the deck. I guess I sleepwalked outside. I would have fallen, but he caught me, Ransom. Axel saved my life. Again.”

Ransom practically collapsed at the table and stared at the floor. I knew what was running through his mind right then. Losing his brother overtook anything else he was feeling.

“Paul gave him the pills,” I spoke up.

Ransom’s head snapped up and he narrowed his eyes at me. “And?”

“And nothing.” I shrugged. “I’m just giving you all the information I have.”

“You’re okay though, right?” Ransom eyed Gareth from head to toe.

“Yes. I’m fine.”

“Are you done screaming now?” I asked Ransom.

“That depends.”

“On?”

“I don’t want Gareth hurt. You don’t strike me as the type of guy who does relationships.”

“Ransom…” Gareth warned.

“As I told Gareth, I don’t know what’s going to happen between us, but I’m not leaving his side until we figure out who is behind these threats. I take this job very seriously. No more hanky panky with Gareth until we solve this.”

“Hey!” Gareth balked. “Don’t I get a say in this?”

“No.” Ransom and I answered in unison.

“Fuck my life.” Gareth blew out an exasperated sigh. “You two are fucking with my sex life.”

“What sex life?” Ransom grinned. “According to Axel here, you didn’t have sex.”

“Shut up,” Gareth grumbled.

“We’re headed into town.” I glanced at Ransom. “We’re doing some homework. Want to help?”

“Yeah. I’ll get the guys in on this, too.”

“Good, we need all the eyes we can get.”

~*~

We sat on the floor as a group sifting through letters, handling them as little as possible to protect any fingerprints the asshole might have been dumb enough to leave, to see if there were threatening letters we might have missed. There were so many letters it was ridiculous. More than one came from a kid who had finally come out because of Gareth. Gareth’s face lit up every time he read one. I had to give him serious props for what he had done. He’d done so much for other kids who were too afraid to come out to their parents.

Ransom was reading the letters from their father while the rest of us sifted through the fan mail.

“Look.” Rebel held up a letter. “This one is around the same as the threatening ones.”

I took it from him and perused the paper. Pieces of newspaper were cut to spell out ‘burn in hell, homo.’ My fingers itched to crumple it and rage rose inside me. What the hell was wrong with people? Gareth preferred men, so what? Who gave a damn in the big picture? Was Gareth’s sex life preventing said fuckhead from getting any? I never did understand homophobic people. Like we gays were subliminally burrowing into their lives and converting them.

My face must have spoken volumes because Gareth placed a soothing hand on my arm.

“Hey, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” I stood up and paced the office floor.