Road to Absolution (19 page)

Tears slipped
down his face. “What do I tell him if she dies?”

“She’s not going
to die,” Payton promised, wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

Jaxon sat in the
chair next to him. “I called Cassidy’s parents and Mia. Her mom will call
Shannon and fill her in. They’re on their way.”

Ace nodded.

“I think you
should get cleaned up,” Jaxon said. “Aidan’s grabbing you some clean clothes. I
figured you wouldn’t want to leave.”

“Thanks.”

Macey returned
twenty minutes later and sat where Payton had been. “Dallas’s brother called in
privileges for me so I could stay updated, but I can’t give you any information
without her next of kin’s permission.”

Dallas Stone was
one of Jaxon’s FBI partners, and Macey’s husband.

“What the fuck?”
Ace bellowed.

“I just need
verbal approval from her mom or dad, Ace. Okay? If we can call them, then I
should be covered.”

“I’m on it.”
Jaxon pulled out his cell phone and dialed Cassidy’s mother.

Once approval
was given, Macey signed some forms, had Ace sign some forms, although he didn’t
read them, and then she left him again.

Macey became his
personal liaison and he honestly didn’t know how he would have managed without
her. Aidan returned with clean clothes, although, Macey had offered to grab him
scrubs, but he decided to wait.

Ace took five
minutes to go to the bathroom and wash up as best he could before shoving his
dirty clothes, cut and all, in a plastic bag, and returning to the waiting
room.

Macey brought
out a bag with Cassidy’s belongings in it, but handed him her engagement ring.
“I figured you probably wouldn’t want this getting lost.”

He nodded and
pulled off the chain around his neck, slipping the ring onto it and sliding it
back around his neck. He found Cassidy’s matching chain and also slipped that
around his neck.

“Surgery’s going
really well,” Macey said. “They got the bleeding under control. She’s out of
the woods. I think they’re just closing up really soon and then she’ll go into
the ICU for observation.”

“But she’s
okay?” he asked.

“She’s out of
the woods.”

He faced her
with a frown. “That’s not what I asked.”

“Carter,” Jaxon
warned.

“Fuck off, Jax.
I want her to tell me if Cassidy’s okay.”

“I really think
you should wait for the doctor so he can explain it.”

“What aren’t you
telling me?” Ace demanded, shrugging off the hand that Jaxon placed on his
shoulder.

Payton sat
beside Macey and took her hand. “Just tell him, Mase.”

Macey grimaced.
“There was some damage to her uterine wall and they’re concerned she may not be
able to carry a baby.”

“What?”

Macey nodded,
her eyes filling with tears. She wiped them away quickly. “I don’t know
anything else. They called in OB/GYN and the doctor’s an incredible surgeon, so
I didn’t want to panic you.”

“Fuck!” Ace
stood and paced the room. Everyone left him alone, which was wise.

A
CE WASN’T ABLE to see Cassidy for
another two hours. She was resting comfortably, or so they said, but she was
out, so he took her hand and raised it to his mouth, kissing her palm. He could
do nothing but wait.

Her parents
arrived an hour or so later and rushed into the room. After checking on Cassidy
and kissing her cheek, Wendy wrapped Ace in a motherly hug. “Hi, honey.”

Ace nodded and
pulled away from her.

“Your friend
Payton is going to take Maverick to her home and we’ve asked her not to say
anything until we can explain to him what’s going on.”

“Thanks.” He
felt like the walls of the room were closing in on him, the panic rising
suddenly and far too quickly.

“Son?” Patrick
asked.

“I need a
minute,” Ace rasped, and stepped out of the room. Bending at the waist, he
anchored his palms on his thighs and took several deep breaths.

Visions of
Cassidy being shot flew threw his mind, only it was him doing the shooting…
just like in his nightmares.

“Carter.” Jaxon
wrapped an arm around his brother’s shoulders and led him to a chair along the
wall. “Take a beat.”

“I did this,” he
whispered. “It’s my fault.”

“No, you didn’t.
You saw it comin’ and got to her faster than anyone could. This could have gone
much, much worse,” Jaxon said.

“She might not
be able to have any kids. That’s on me,” Ace argued. “I should have fuckin’
tied her to a chair instead of lettin’ her go into work.”

“Look, I know
nothing I say is gonna make you feel better, but you identified the threat and
got to her faster than anyone could have. If you hadn’t, he could have gotten
her leaving the building and she might be somewhere you couldn’t get to her.
Trust me, brother, it could have been worse, and she’s alive because of you.”

Ace dragged his
hands through his hair.

“Carter?” Wendy
called. “She’s asking for you.”

Ace shot to his
feet and made his way back to the room, stepping to the bed. “Hey, baby.”

“Where’s
Maverick?” she asked.

“He’s with
Payton, honey. He’s safe.”

“I want him
here,” she said, grabbing his hand and squeezing. “Please, bring him here. I
need to see him.”

“Okay, baby.
I’ll get Hawk to bring him.”

“Don’t leave.”

Ace smiled,
leaning down to kiss her gently. “I’m gonna have Jax tell Hawk. I’ll be right
back.”

“He’s okay?”

“He’s great,
baby. I promise. No one’s told him anything.”

“Wait,” she
said. “Maybe we shouldn’t tell him yet.”

“Whatever you
want me to do, I’ll do it, honey.” Cassidy still hadn’t released his hand.

“We should
probably wait.”

Ace kept hold of
her hand as he sat in the chair next to the bed.

“Are you in any
pain, honey?” Wendy asked.

“Not right now,”
Cassidy said. “Everything just feels kind of tight.”

Wendy fussed
while Patrick sat on the other side of her, his hand on her arm like he was
afraid she’d disappear. Two doctors walked in a few minutes later and closed
the door.

“I’m Dr.
Nelson,” the surprisingly young surgeon said.

“I’m Dr.
Waring,” the older man with her said.

“Perhaps we
should get some privacy so we can talk,” Dr. Nelson said.

“I’m fine,”
Cassidy said. “They can stay.”

Ace linked his
fingers with hers. He had an idea of what was coming and knew she’d have a
difficult time processing.

“There was quite
a bit of internal damage, which we were able to repair, however, we are still
concerned about the damage to your uterus.”

Cassidy gasped.
“What happened to my uterus?”

“The bullet
damaged the uterine wall and I was afraid I’d have to perform a hysterectomy.”

“Did you?”
Cassidy asked, tears sliding down her face. Ace kissed her hand, laying her
hand against his cheek.

“No. I repaired
what I could,” Dr. Nelson said. “But only time will tell if there any further
complications. It’s possible you might not be able to carry a child, Cassidy.”

“What?” Cassidy
burst into tears.

“We don’t know
for sure yet,” Ace said.

“But you want a
hundred kids,” she cried.

“There are other
ways to get kids, baby,” he whispered, stroking her cheek.

“It’s not a
definite outcome,” Dr. Nelson said. “We have every hope that your body will do
what it’s designed to do and finish off the healing process. We’ll keep a close
eye on you and monitor you as you heal.”

Ace watched as
Cassidy shut down. He knew it the second her tears stopped and she started
nodding at everything the doctors said. She’d checked out and wasn’t listening
to anything they were saying. He did his best to focus on the doctor’s
instructions because she’d need to know eventually.

* * *

Cassidy was sleeping and Patrick was
making a food run while Wendy quietly read a book, so Ace stepped into the
hallway to call Hawk.

“Hey, Ace.”

“Hey. Cass has
to be here for at least a week, so I’m thinkin’ I’ll come pick up Maverick
tomorrow and bring him, if that’s okay.”

“No problem. We
told him you and Cassidy were doin’ somethin’ so he got to stay the night with
us. He’s happy, man. We got him.”

Ace sighed.
“Thanks. ’Preciate it.”

“You wanna talk
to him?”

“No, because he
might want to talk to Cass and she’s asleep.”

“Good thinkin’.
Okay, just swing by tomorrow whenever. We’ll be here.”

“Thanks again.”
Ace hung up and made his way back into the room, interrupting an argument
between Cassidy and her mother. “What’s goin’ on? You okay?”

“Fine.” Cassidy
glared at her mom.

“Hey,” Ace said,
and sat beside her again. “What’s up?”

“She thinks you
two should break up,” Wendy provided.

“Mom,” Cassidy
snapped.

“Why?” Ace asked
carefully.

“Because she’s
decided that what’s done is done and since she can’t give you children, she’s
useless to you,” Wendy said.

“Mom, shut up!”
Cassidy hissed.

Ace stood and
smiled. “Wendy, can I have a few minutes with your daughter?”

“Only if you
plan to talk some sense into her.”

“Of course I
do.”

Wendy smiled,
kissed his cheek, and sidled out the door. He went back to the bed, but instead
of sitting on the chair, he sat on the mattress beside Cassidy.

“We don’t have
to make any decisions now,” Cassidy whispered, not meeting his eyes.

“Look at me,
Cassidy,” he demanded quietly.

Her eyes flew to
him and he raised her palm to his lips. “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

“I know you say
that now because I’m lying—”

“I swear to
fuckin’ Christ, Cassidy, you keep talkin’ like that and I will handcuff you
permanently to this bed. You’ll be stuck with me literally.”

“You don’t own
handcuffs,” she grumbled.

“Yes I do.”

“You do?”

Ace nodded.

“Do I want to
know why you have those handcuffs?” she asked.

“It’s not
because of anything fun,” he informed her. “Look, this sucks. All of it. But
we’re in it together and if you talk about us doin’ anything goin’ forward
alone, I will lose my fuckin’ mind. I don’t love you because you can or can’t
give me kids. I love you and Maverick with every part of me, and you are
enough. You’re more than enough. If we want more kids and we can’t get them the
traditional way, then we’ll adopt or use a surrogate, or whatever.”

“But you want a
lot
of kids.”

“You’re not
hearin’ me, honey,” he said. “I want you more than I want more kids, Cassidy.
I’ve tried livin’ without you. It doesn’t work and if you try to separate me from
our kid, you’ll regret it.”

“Dipshit bolt.”
He could tell she was trying not to smile.

“Fuckin’ nut,”
he retorted.

“I’m giving you
an out, Carter.”

“Fuck me, Cass,
I don’t want an out.” He pulled their chains from around his neck and helped
her put hers on, before pulling her engagement ring off his and sliding it back
onto her finger. “You’re my world, baby. I can’t live without you. Either of
you.”

He leaned down
to kiss her but she turned her head. “I haven’t brushed my teeth since this
morning.”

“I don’t care,”
he said, and kissed her. After breaking the kiss, he stroked her cheek. “I’m
gonna get your mom. No more talk of us breaking up, yeah?”

“Okay,” she
whispered.

“I talked to
Hawk and I’ll pick Maverick up and bring him tomorrow. Tonight he’ll stay
blissfully unaware that anything’s wrong, yeah?” She nodded, her face
contorting in pain. “How bad?”

“Bad, but…” she
said, and pressed the button for the pain pump, quickly falling asleep.