Riccardo (9 page)

CHAPTER TEN

LORENA

As Daddy promised, we arrived in Rome with two days to spare before my course began. Unfortunately, Raphael was hit hard with jet lag, so Paulie and I were left to entertain ourselves while Raph slept. Thankfully, the apartment Daddy had rented was spacious. We sat on the lounge chairs, each leaning our backs against an arm and facing each other. With our feet in each other’s laps, we shared stories of our upbringing before Paulie changed to the present. "So, you and Riccardo?"

"There's nothing between me and Riccardo," I lied. I tried to keep my face as neutral as possible as he was clearly studying it.

"Bullshit. I've seen the looks you both give each other, and besides, if there was nothing between you, he wouldn't have warned me off you the other week," he admitted.

"He warned you off me? He probably didn't want you to betray Daddy's trust. He seems to be more bothered about that than what I want," I grumbled as I picked at my pink nail varnish.

"So something has happened? I knew it." Paulie sounded ecstatic at the news. It just made me feel depressed knowing Riccardo wouldn’t even give this thing between us a chance.

"Yeah, something happened in the heat of the moment, and then when he came to his senses, he told me I couldn't satisfy his needs. I don't know what to think anymore. That's why I jumped at the chance to get away. I need the time to figure out if I want to push him," I stated. I wanted him. God, did I want him. I just didn't know if I wanted him enough to tear our
famiglia
apart.

"He wants you for more than just a fuck. I know he does," Paulie reassured me as he stroked my shin.

"Maybe I just need to make him jealous." I glanced up at Paulie. “Fancy a ‘no strings attached’ fling?” I half joked. In a way, it was a good idea. Maybe Riccardo needed to see me with someone else to give him the knock on the head, allowing him to push his issues aside. Having a fling with Paulie wouldn’t really be a hardship; he was sexy as sin.

Paulie’s face completely dropped at my suggestion. “I… He… It…” he stammered.

“Jesus, Paulie, you could give a girl a complex with a reaction like that. Does the thought of being with me really disturb you that much?” I asked, changing my tone from joking to serious with the question.

“What? No!” He pushed my legs aside and turned to face forward on the chair. He leaned his head in his hands and looked like he was deciding on what to say next. He took a deep breath, before turning his head to look me in the eyes as he spoke. “I’m gay.”

My jaw dropped and I had to question whether I heard correctly. “You’re gay? Like, you like men?”

He nodded, not taking his eyes off mine.

“But… all those times I’ve flirted with you, you’ve laughed along or even looked…” I couldn’t find the word to describe him, maybe nervous or anxious would fit. I always thought it was because he liked me. That was how the other guys who want some but knew they couldn’t have any reacted.

“I was nervous,” he offered, finishing my sentence and clarifying the emotion. “Nervous because I was worried that my reactions to your flirting may give away my sexuality.”

“The guys wouldn’t care. None of them are homophobic,” I said, surprised he’d think differently.

“I know, but as much as I'd like to be treated equally with the other guys, I never will be. I wasn't born into the Mafia life like they all were. I didn’t want my sexuality to separate me even more.” He paused for a second before adding, “It’s silly, I know.”

I sat up and faced forward, mirroring his position. I playful nudged him with my shoulder. “No, it’s not silly. I get it. Are you ever going to tell them?” I asked.

He sighed heavily. “I don’t think I have a choice anymore. Riccardo saw me with some random guy the night before we flew out. Emotions were flying high and I wasn’t as careful as I usually am. I had him pressed against the alley behind the club. Riccardo had decided to park around the back for a change.” He shook his head in disbelief. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen any of the guys park around there. Bad luck follows me everywhere.”

“What did Riccardo say?” I asked, wondering how Riccardo would react to the news. Was he as shocked as I was, or did he already suspect something?

Paulie glanced towards the closed door of the bedroom Raphael was occupying before standing. “Come on, let’s go for a walk. We’ll be fine without Raph for a little while.”

“Okay.” I jumped up and slipped my feet into my wedges. We were out the door and walking down the quiet street in a matter of minutes.

Paulie started the conversation where we had left off. “I heard the car and turned to see who it was. Riccardo made direct eye contact with me, so I know he saw me. He didn’t say a word. He walked past us without batting an eyelid. I was dreading that hour before we left your house for the flight. Waiting for him to call me up on it, but he didn’t. The only time he spoke to me was when he warned me to not allow any man near you, and told both Raph and I to look after you, or there would be repercussions.”

I was just about to question him about his ‘random’ when my phone chimed in my pocket. I glanced at the screen as I pulled it out. Daddy. “Hi, Daddy. Yes, I’m still as okay as I was when you rang an hour ago,” I berated him. He’d been ringing almost every hour and was driving me mad. I hoped he calmed down with his calls before I started the course because I’d never learn anything if he disturbed me every hour.

“Don’t be like that, Lorena. I’m your father, I’m entitled to be concerned about your safety. I worry when you aren’t under Riccardo’s watchful eye,” he admitted, unafraid to show his shortcomings. It always made my heart squeeze when I heard him say something that reminded me of how much he loved me.

“I love you, too, Daddy,” I whispered into the phone. Paulie directed me towards a little coffee shop with a hand on my shoulder, as I talked to my father. “Paulie and Raphael are taking good care of me.”

“No they aren’t. Raphael isn’t even with you right now.” I cut my eyes towards Paulie, wondering how the hell my father knew that. There had been many times in my life when I’d wondered if he had cameras on me. “Before you ask, I called Raph before I called you. I was sure you might be sick of hearing from me by now,” he admitted.

“Never,” I replied, hearing Matias cry in the background. “How is my little brother?” I asked as I took a seat at an outside table. Paulie ordered our drinks whilst I listened to my father’s reply.

“He’s grouchy. Sierra says he’s teething. I think it’s just the genes. You were a grouchy little thing at this age, too,” he said with a laugh as Matias cried a little louder.

“I’ll let you go give him cuddles. Make sure you give him one from me,” I said before hanging up. I didn’t give him the chance to say goodbye. He would have only given me a lecture on being safe and then demanded to talk to Paulie, so he could give him the lecture too. All the while poor Matias would be crying his little heart out.

Placing the phone in my pocket, I directed all my attention on Paulie. “So, tell me all about this
friend
of yours,” I demanded.

***

I was so lucky to have been able to enrol in this course and get in. I was sure my father had something to do with it and pulled some strings because I heard from other students that the waiting list was huge. Either way, I was so grateful to have been selected. The interior design course was truly amazing,

The weeks had flown by and in a matter of days; I was going to leave this beautiful country and head back to Australia. Back to face Riccardo. I couldn’t let him affect or cloud my final days here as I had learned so much in such a short time. I was so motivated and I couldn't wait to kick-start a career in the industry once I returned to Australia.

For our final assessment, we had to design a room from a blank canvas, just an empty room measuring five square metres. I chose to make mine a bedroom; it had a vintage feel. I wanted to stay close to my roots, ensuring I put as much Italian culture as I could into it. I put my all into it and it paid off. My lecturer was the famous Giancarlo Settimano. He was so impressed with the bedroom I had completed, that he offered me a job working for him. He recently had a designer leave to branch out on their own and he had an opening.

Ideally, it would have been a fantastic opportunity, to have Giancarlo Settimano's name on my résumé. Not only to have been taught by him, but to have actually worked under him was surreal. It was a dream come true. A dream I once had. In saying that though, as much as I enjoyed my time in Italy, I just didn't feel like I could stay. It wasn’t the right time for me. I missed my family way too much. I needed to go home. I
wanted
to go home.

My time away from my family and the mafia lifestyle proved to me that not only did I need my family close, but that I belonged there. I wouldn't be the same person if I had been brought up any other way. I'd met a lovely girl named Bianca. She was only a few months younger than me, but so much more naïve. Observing her behaviour, both at the course and socially, made me realise I was not the weak little girl I once was. I had matured and become far more wary, almost hardened. After this trip and the things I'd seen and done, I was proud of who I’d become. I wouldn't want to be anything but the mafia princess I was.

If Riccardo couldn’t see that side of me, then that was a fault with him not me. Maybe I'd invite Bianca to come visit us in Sydney. Ten minutes in a room with her and Riccardo would surely see I'd matured. He’d also better be ready for our confrontation because I was not going to be idle and not say anything. I wanted answers and Riccardo had a lot to answer for.

***

It was our last day in Sicily, and I desperately wanted to go visit the gravestones of my grandparents, who were buried at Leni Cemetery in the Messina Provence. Paulie stayed behind to do some last minute packing and I had Raphael drive me to the local flower shop where I spent some time picking out a few arrangements for the graves. I knew my father didn't have the best relationship with his own father, but I still wanted to pay my respects and I couldn't visit one grandparent and not the other.

As we walked through the open wrought-iron gates of the cemetery and steadily made our way to the Morassi graves, I felt a sense of peace and tranquillity. The cool breeze swept over my body and it made me wonder if that breeze was my grandparents welcoming me there.

Setting down the arrangements of flowers, I raised my hand to the thick marble headstone, tracing the engravings of first my grandmother and then my grandfather’s name. I was instinctively aware of someone behind me as I heard the gravel crunch.

“I'd be careful if I were you. Touching that name, Giovanni Morassi, may just burn a hole in your hand. That man was dangerous and evil.”

I turned to look behind me, and what I saw was quite unbelievable. The man before me looked like a Morassi. He resembled my father; however, this man had a shaved head. He was built like a tank and I could see the markings of his tattoos through his linen white shirt, which was tightly stretched across his chest.

“And you are?” I asked the stranger. Raphael was still standing where he was and made no move at all to try and warn the stranger off me, which is what puzzled me.

“Dante Morassi. And you must be the beautiful
Signorina
Morassi.” The gorgeous hunk of a man stretched his arm to take my hand in his and kiss my inner wrist. “You are a vision. The Don has told me all about you, Lorena.”

“You're Dante Morassi, my father’s cousin? Oh, my gosh. I can't believe I finally get to meet you. It's just a shame it has to be in a cemetery and that it's our last night here.”

“
Sì è vero
. I'm your father’s first cousin.”

“So, let me get this right. You are the son of
Zio
Romero, my grandfather’s youngest brother?” I queried, raising my eyebrows and looking from him to Raphael, who was extremely quiet behind me.

“
Sì
. I am. My father was the youngest Morassi brother. He died when I was five,” Dante explained.

“I assume you’re here visiting his grave then?”

“Well, I wouldn't be here visiting his arsehole of a brother’s grave, would I?” Dante spat out viciously. He heard my intake of breath and apologised. “
Mi dispiace
, I forget he's your grandfather.”

I shouldn't be surprised. I knew my grandfather was not a well-liked man. My father hated him. It made me wonder what he had done to Dante’s family and why he was so full of hate towards him.

“Why don't we all talk about this over dinner tonight, Dante, since it's our last evening here in Messina?” Raphael interrupted. “Don Sebastiano will be very happy to know we bumped into you here in Sicily. He would expect us to get together, as a family.”

“I'd love to. I fly out to New York tomorrow to attend to some family business and I was anticipating a night of rest, but there's no way I can pass up catching up with
famiglia
.”

Dante was a charmer, and a damn fine hot one too. “I can't wait to catch up with you this evening,” I said, leaning up and kissing his cheek. “You know you remind me a lot of my father. Have the two of you ever met?”

“Yes, several times. We communicate all the time because of the family business. I travel a lot, looking after things for him here in Sicily and in the U.S.A. I'd love to get out to Australia one day soon. It's been on my agenda for a few years now.”