Rhythm of the Imperium (29 page)

CHAPTER 29

We had a long wait before being able to make the final jump deep into Zang space, and a long period of nothingness awaited us afterward until we would reach the platform. Though it was by far the shortest interval remaining in our long journey from the Core Worlds, it seemed as though it stretched on beyond infinity.

“Possibly even as long as a Zang’s memory,” I suggested, as Xan paced the floor.

“Why can’t we just go?” he asked, kicking the edge of the rug with a peevish toe. “Who put that there?”

“It has been there all along,” Leonat said, sitting crosslegged on a padded footstool, with her elbows balanced upon her knees. She gestured to the couch beside her. We could chide Xan openly, as the present group contained only family. All of our retainers and Laine were spending the early part of the day-shift going about their own business, preparing for arrival. “Do sit down, Xan. It doesn’t make things go any faster while you walk up and back.”

“I’m bored!” Xan declared, as though it was a sensation new to him. He stormed toward the far wall. It had been repaired so that the damage done by the Kail was invisible. Then he returned and glared at all of us as though we had been the ones to scatter handfuls of smaller ships in our own path. “I’m tired of the Kail being everywhere we go. They’re such a nuisance! They behave as if we are beneath dirt. It’s horrible. The way they look at me makes me feel filthy.”

“Well, they do bathe far more often than we do,” Leonat said. “They’ve got a huge, freshwater pool in their cabin. They smell of rain-washed stone. It’s the nicest thing about them.”

“When they don’t stink of burning sulfur!” Rillion said, kicking off his shoes and lying prone in his stocking feet. His long red hair spread over the carpet. “You must not have been around when they emitted gases. Then they glare at one as if it was one’s fault. Oh, stars, Xan, sit down! You’re going to step on my hair.”

“I can’t,” Xan said. Rillion scrambled up out of his way and flopped down on a nearby couch. Xan continued to pace.

I waited until he had made one more annoyed circuit. I had observing him all my life, of course, as he was one of my favorite cousins, but of late I had taken to watching him and the others more closely, the better to work them into a grand performance with which I planned to conclude our journey when we returned home to Keinolt. There was no difficulty in giving them a bit of a preview. I sprang to my feet.

“My Lords and Ladies, Lord Xanson Melies Kinago,” I announced. Though Xan was an inch or so taller than I, with shoulders quite a bit wider, I had gained enough theatrical skills in my lessons with Madame Deirdre to pantomime a grander silhouette. Swiping one hand down before my face, I revealed a stern visage with lower lip protruding slightly in an expression of exaggerated displeasure. Nell, Jil and Nalney let out shouts of merriment.

“Not funny, Thomas,” Xan said.

“Of course not,” I said. Swinging my arms in enormous arcs, I mimed his angry walk, thrusting aside spaceships, moons, and even blazing hot suns in an effort to gain access to my end. That goal happened to be a sphere that I captured between my outstretched hands. My face took on an expression of bliss and excitement as I beheld it from every angle. Then the orb in my hands blew up. The force threw me backwards, sending me tumbling head over heels. My cousins burst into laughter. Rillion pounded the arm of his couch with delight.

Xan growled. He gave a running leap and sprang, intending to land on me and, as he had done so many times in our youth, to pummel me into dust. I had gained a good deal of speed and fitness from my dance training as well as my previous military experience. I rolled nimbly out of his way and attempted to crawl to safety. With his superior reach, he managed to grab one of my ankles and yanked me back into his grasp. We wrestled on the rug, each scrabbling for an advantageous hold. I was not as strong nor as determined as he was, however. With a couple of expert twists, Xan ended up sitting on my chest. His cheeks were flushed red, but his bad mood had passed. His bright blue eyes twinkled.

“All right,” he admitted, looking down on me from his superior position. “It
was
funny.” He glanced up with a speculative eye at the circle of faces surrounding us. “Can you do Nalney?”

“No!” Nalney called. “Do Erita!”

“No,” Erita protested. “It’s always me.”

“Do Parsons,” Nell said, with mischief lighting her eyes.

“Yes! Parsons!” Xan got up and offered me a hand. I took it and was wrenched roughly to my feet.

As I had already acted him out for Madame Deirdre, it was little trouble to call up the graceful yet dignified motions that made my mentor discernible even at a distance. I drew myself up, squared my shoulders, and set about putting the world to rights. When chaos confronted me, I turned to face it with a level gaze. I employed not only micro-expressions, but micro-motions. Nothing, not even colliding galaxies, was enough to break my calm. I exuded power, but in a subtle fashion that made even Xan give ground to me when I moved toward him. The rest of my family laughed and hooted at him. Xan gave me a sheepish grin. Even the symbol of Parsons was enough to generate respect.

While I progressed in my stately pavane, I pondered the less-than-perfect way in which the man himself had been moving the last several days, since our return from Counterweight. If it had not been Parsons of whom I was thinking, I would have thought he was in pain. Such a concept shook me to the depths of my being. Of all the people in the orbit of my life, I could not and would not think of Parsons as being mortal in any way. I expected that when I lay upon my deathbed, at the ripe age of a century and a half or more, he would stand at my side, looking precisely the same as he did now, peering down at me with a grave demeanor and reassure me that the clothes I had chosen to die in were completely unsuitable.

The vision cheered me up at once. It chased away the unhappy thoughts, leaving me to ramp up my impression into one that was openly ridiculous. I glided between my cousins, plucking problems away and casting them into the outer darkness. Nothing ever quite rose to my lofty standards, but I knew in my heart that I served the Imperium with all my heart, and no matter what faults lay those poor mortals who made up its core, I would defend them with my life. This last I intimated by standing stalwart against a charging menace. With pure force of will, I caused it to slow to a stop, then I flicked it away with a mere twitch of my finger.

My cousins rolled with laughter on their couches and divans, but at the final sequence, they sat up, eyes wide.

I had chased away the threat before me, but I sensed yet another close by.

“He’s standing behind me,” I said, casually, to a goggle-eyed audience of my nearest and dearest. “I always know he’s there, because I didn’t hear him approach.”

Nell nodded, eyes as large as saucers.

I turned. Indeed, the gentleman himself stood there before me. I tried to detect a modicum of amusement in his expression, but alas, I was not Plet, who was adept at reading even his dearth of reaction. I assumed a casual stance, relaxing my shoulders.

“Parsons, always a pleasure. To what do we owe the honor of this visit?”

“A warning, my lords and ladies,” Parsons replied, his dark eyes expressionless as though he had not just witnessed a spirited pastiche of his calm style and demeanor. It made me feel guilty, even though parody was protected under the law. “We will arrive at the viewing platform within twelve hours. Please be prepared to transfer the belongings you wish to take with you. Laundry facilities and valet services are waiting for you on the platform. The shuttles will be available to convey you back to the
Jaunter
if you wish, but please keep in mind that the situation is still … malleable. Take a security detail with you when you go anywhere alone. They will answer your summons any time of the day or night. If an alarm is sounded, please remain where you are or retreat to a safe location and await further news. May I count upon you for your cooperation?”

Unspoken was the threat hanging over our heads that we would end up locked in our cabins for the duration, and not be permitted to witness the spectacle with our own eyes. It was a warning like many that we had had to listen to all of our lives. For all the fact we behaved with free spirits most of the time, we knew the problems it would cause if one of us went missing.

“Agreed,” we chorused.

“Very well,” Parsons said. “Please try to amuse yourselves until then … If there is a security announcement, please pay heed to every detail.”

“Do you believe there will be one?” Jil asked, her eyes wide with worry. Sinim clasped her hands and looked woeful. Parsons turned a kindly visage toward them.

“I could not say, my lady. Please be aware and respond accordingly. I would require your word on it.”

“We will,” I promised him.

He departed. We were left to stare at one another in bemusement.

I clapped my hands together.

“How about a quick round of Hide-and-Seek?” I asked. “The winner receives the remainder of my supply of Ramulthy truffles. I have four white and one black left.”

“N-n-nooo,” Erita droned. “I don’t want to get up!”

“Then what do you want to do?” Xan asked, reasonably. “My valet already knows what I want to take to the platform hotel. My packing will consist of having him reassure me that everything is in my travel cases, for which I will offer praise and thanks. That won’t take up any measurable portion of twelve hours.”

Nalney brightened. “I just remembered, I heard a good joke while I was on Counterweight!”

I sat down on a handy chair. Several eager faces turned toward Nalney.

“Tell it!” I demanded. “Always pleased to have a story I may add to my mental database.”

“Well,” he began, “there was a horse who walked into a tavern… .”

“How could a horse walk into a tavern?” Erita asked, her face sour.

“Well, just say there was one,” Nalney said. “I don’t interrupt your stories!”

“You do!”

“Only when they’re boring!”

“Well, you’re no good at telling jokes. You always forget some detail and go back to explain it, which makes your stories very dull.”

I thought it best to step, in a verbal sense, of course, into the midst of this growing catastrophe. After all, I was the undisputed master of the humorous anecdote.

“Do you know, I think I heard the same one, Nalney,” I said. “Was it about a horse with a waterfowl on its back?”

Nalney’s face took on a pinched look as he clawed back recollection. “Yes! I think it was. And there was a frog, and a couple of crickets …”

“Did it go like this?” I asked. “Stop me if I fall off the tracks. The horse in question trotted into a tavern, with a duck, a frog and two crickets …” And before anyone else could offer a critique, I was off. The tale was a longish one, winding in and out of different points of view, but leading one back to the punch line, which I permitted to play out until I had the attention of everyone in the room, including Erita. “… I told them it was a hay bar, but none of them believed me!”

“Yes!” Nalney said, relieved to hear the conclusion that he faintly recalled. “That was it!”

“So, you see, he can tell a good joke,” I said. “Here’s another one I would wager you heard.”

I began to tell jokes and stories gleaned from my capacious memory. My collection of humorous anecdotes was, I fancy, unrivaled throughout the aristocracy and much of the lower classes in the Imperium.

Nell had not heard some of the newer ones. She had been at school while I was out on a mission with the long-suffering Admiral Podesta, to whom I was forever grateful for putting me on punishment duty where I encountered a virtually limitless fount of funny tales and witticisms. My cousins were greatly envious, though they would have been hard pressed to have delved diamonds out of the dirt I was forced to sift. On the other hand, they would also have been unlikely to have been taken aboard the admiral’s flagship.

At the conclusion of the last, which left me gasping for air, Nell jumped to her feet.

“That was wonderful, Thomas!” she said. “And now, I’ll take on your challenge. Hide-and-Seek! I’ll be It. Everyone go hide! I’ll find you, and if I do, you’ll all have to pay a penalty!” She covered her eyes with her palms. “One, two, three, four, five … !”

We sprang up and ran.

Rillion and I went for the emergency ladder behind the wall beside the commissary, and clambered down into the depths of the ship. “You’re not going for the empty compartment beside the cold storage, are you?” he asked. I was below him on the steps. That had been my destination, but I was happy to cede it to him.

“You can go there,” I said. “I was going to hide in the hydroponics center, under the potting table. Nell will never look for me there.”

We reached the next level, where the cold storage unit was situated. He punched me in the arm and ran off. I kept descending. My destination was four levels further down.

My viewpad began to vibrate. Hanging from a metal cleat by my elbow in the semi-darkness was not the best way to answer it, but I managed to work the device out of its pouch and hold it up to eye level.

“Thomas here,” I said, as the screen changed from its initial graphic to the image of a face of a handsome blonde woman. “Good afternoon, Lieutenant Plet!”

“Lord Thomas,” she said, as though surprised. “This a general call to the crew, not for you.”

“But I am part of the crew!” I protested. My voice rose and echoed off the metal walls of the tube I was in. I ducked and fell silent. I was not beyond earshot for anyone close to the entry hatch. Nell might hear me.

“Not for this, Lord Thomas,” she said. She looked exasperated. “Please remain where you are. Do not inform anyone that you have been in touch with me, and do not communicate with the Kail.”

“I wasn’t going to,” I replied. The possibilities for adventure aroused my soul. “What are you doing with regard to the Kail? May I help?”

“No! Yes,” she amended, clearly conflicted. She was failing Parsons 101 in unflappableness. “Keep your cousins safe. If any alarm is raised, get them to a secure location.”