Rhythm (6 page)

“Oh. Okay. Bye, you two. It is nice seeing
you.”

We turn around then Cale whispers, “I bet it
is,” and winks at me.

“Drop it, Cale. Not a word with Rip. Got
me?”

“Yes, sir.” He gives me a salute.

I can’t take my mind off Riley. Should I tell
Rhy about her? Yes, I should, but why? It’s not as if I cheated on
her, but I want to be honest with Rhy all the time. I don’t want to
build a wall between us, especially now that she opened up to me.
I’ll tell her soon.

That’s right, Grant, tell her soon.

Rhythm

“Rip, don’t look. 3 o’clock.”

I start to turn my head, but Lola grabs my
face. “I said don’t look!”

“L, my face!”

“Shh. You better keep your mouth shut. I’ll
tell you when it’s safe to look. I’ll tell y—”

“Oh, my word, L! She’s here!”

“Rip! What did I tell you?” She shakes her
head. “Now, what?” She scolds me.

I instantly regret I didn’t listen to Lola.
Once again, she’s right.

She stands up, flips her long jet black hair,
smooths her pink floral dress, and smiles. She is perfection. She’s
another reason I don’t trust people to be attached with me. Ben, my
first love, is her first love, and she is Ben’s.

Ben and I were best friends when we were children.
We spent all our waking moments with each other. We promised that
we would be there for each other no matter what. We agreed to wait
for us to be teenagers so that we could be official. He would be my
first boyfriend and I would be his first girlfriend. I thought I
finally found someone who would be with me, who would never leave
me. On our birthday, which marked our teenage years, I woke up
excitedly. I dressed nicely and went to meet Ben in our meeting
place where we will seal our love. One hour later, but still there
is no Ben to be found. I decided, then, to go to his room through
our secret passage. That was when I had the biggest shock of my
life.

Ben was in his bed, naked, with a girl on top of
him—whom I know well. She’s our neighbor, his first love, who broke
his heart. What in the world were they doing? What in the world was
I thinking? Love? I wanted to vomit.

I tried to control my sobs, but I couldn’t. He heard
me.

“
Rhy?” Ben learned that they were not alone
anymore. “Please let me explain.” His voice was hoarse, and his
face was masked with worry, but I didn’t wait for him to explain
anymore. I run. Run. Run. I run to face the truth: I am better off
alone. That way, I wouldn’t get hurt. Why did it have to be like
that? He was the only one I can turn to. He was my best friend. He
was my first love. What Ben and I have ended even before it
started.

Days passed and I didn’t give Ben a chance to
explain. What would that scene explains? There are lots, but not a
single thing about his love for me. He didn’t love me because if he
did, why would he do that? No. I promised myself that I wouldn’t
think about him anymore. I got it. I was alone, and I would be
alone for the rest of my life. I couldn’t trust anyone. People
would only leave me. People would only hurt me, but I wouldn’t
allow that. Not anymore.

I don’t realize that I am teary-eyed until
Lola gives me a tissue.

“Hey, are you okay?”

“No. Shall we go?”

“I’m almost done. Are you?”

“Yes.”

After we pay, we leave.

I am disoriented not to notice right away
that I pass by Grant’s pick up truck, until I smack right into his
chest.

“I’m sorry,” he says, unaware of whom he
bumped into. “Rhy?”

I avoid his eyes, doing my best to hide that
my once lively gray eyes turned to dull.

“Are you okay?”

When I don’t respond, he asks, “Lola?”

“We saw some—”

“No one. We saw no one. I’m okay, Grant.
We’re headed home.”

“I’ll take you two home.”

“We’ll just ride a cab.”

“No. Ride with me, Rhy. Please,” he says with
a perturbed look.

“Okay.”

Our ride home is uneventful, and the silence
is deafening.

“I’ll listen,” Grant mutters when we arrive
at my dorm.

I’m surprised to hear that I say, “Okay.”
That means I have to relive
the moment
.

Lola understands the weight of my
conversation with Grant, so she asks Cale to accompany her.

When we’re alone, Grant waits for me to start
the conversation.

“I . . . don’t know where to start.”

“Start from the beginning.”

I tell him everything about Ben, everything
about his first love. After I finish my story, I can’t believe that
I am sobbing. I thought I’ve moved on. I thought it doesn’t hurt
this much anymore. I’m totally wrong. I get lost in the memory word
after word, scene after scene.

“He’s another reason why you think people
will leave you, isn’t he?”

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry to be upfront with you, Rhy, but
you don’t realize that he didn’t leave you. You didn’t give him a
chance to explain.”

“Do you think with what I have seen there’s
an acceptable explanation?”

“I didn’t tell you
that
, but he didn’t
leave you. Well, maybe he left because he gave you the time and
space you needed at the moment. Maybe he wasn’t able to get a
chance to talk with you anymore, so he just left you.”

“I don’t get it. You’re on his side.”

“I am on no one’s side. I’m just telling you
what I think.”

“You think that I should’ve listened to him
explain?”

He nods.

“And you think he only left me because he
wants to give me time and space?”

He nods again.

“And you think that I should get it?”

“I think that when you see Ben again, you
should talk with him—to clear things.”

“It wasn’t Ben that I saw. I saw the
girl.”

“You know her personally?”

“Not personally, no.” When he doesn’t
respond, I ask, “So what do you think?”

“I think you should talk to Ben when you see
him.”

“That’s easy for you to say, but okay, I’ll
prepare myself a speech.”

“Don’t practice what you’re about to tell
him. Speak with him from your heart, not from your mind.”

“You’re okay with that?”

“With what?”

“Talk with him.”

“Yes. Unless you plan on making good on your
promise with him,” he teases.

“Whatever.” I laugh.

“It’s good to hear you laugh. You okay
now?”

I smile. “Mmmkay.”

I’m relieved I poured my heart out to Grant,
even though I’ve been consumed once again with the pain as I relive
the moment my heart was broken.

I take a deep breath, as I meditate how
blessed I am to have someone like Grant in my life. I know that I
should trust that Grant is different, that there’s still someone
who will never hurt and leave me. I was hurt, yes, but I have to
stop expecting worst from everyone.

Grant

Months passed, but I haven’t had the guts to
tell Rhy about Riley. We’re doing great, and I don’t want to ruin
what we have now. We will celebrate our 1st year soon, and I want
to surprise her—as usual.

By now, I know that she loves nature, and a
date that involves nature wouldn’t go wrong.

I remember when Lola told me that they tried
to dine in a fancy restaurant just for fun. Well, everything went
nothing but fun. Rhy wasn’t at ease with all the fanciness around
her that she broke almost all the breakable things around her.

Rhythm likes being herself, and I cringe as I
imagine her in that restaurant, so I make sure to spend time with
her where she can be herself. Besides, I love seeing how at ease
she is.

As I prepare for school, I am startled by a
knock on our door. Cale left an hour ago and said he wouldn’t be
back until later after lunch.

I am expecting Rhy, but it’s still early. I
open the door and instantly regret it.

“Hello, Grant.” She beams at me then hugs me.
I don’t hug her back. She feels the tension in my body and lets me
go. “Can I come in?”

“I’m headed out. Why are you here?”

“That’s how you talk to your girlfriend?”

“You’re not my girlfriend, Riley.”

“I am your girlfriend, Grant. We never broke
up.”

“Don’t pull that on me. We’re not together
anymore.”

“What makes you think that we’re no longer
together?”

“What makes you think that we are?”

“Really, Grant?” She breathes heavily. “If
you like this conversation, then kindly let me in.”

I give up and let her in. Besides, there is
no point in arguing with her in front of an audience.

“Explain. Now.”

“Okay, I’m sorry for what I’ve done a year
ago.”

“Three years ago.”

“Right. Anyway, I told you I couldn’t go home
with you. I thought that we had an understanding. I did my part for
our long-distance relationship. I sent you snail mails just like
how you wanted, but I never received any response. I didn’t break
up with you neither did you break up with me, so I guess we are
still together.”

“I replied in every mails you sent me until
they stopped coming.”

“I didn’t receive any. I promise, Grant. Can
we fix this misunderstanding?”

“Misunderstanding? Riley, we don’t have
communication for three years, and the last time we bumped into
each other, you were nothing but casual. Remember? Now you’re
claiming that we are still together? What are you talking about?
Are you out of your mind?”

“Grant, I didn’t know what to say to you. I
panicked, but I’ve spent some time to think things through, and I
still love you. I never stopped loving you, Grant. Please, give me
another chance. Give us another chance.”

I don’t answer. How will I tell her that I
have moved on? She used to be the love of my life, but now, Rhythm
has my heart—whole of it. There’s nothing left for her.

I start to tell her about Rhythm when she
hugs me. Again. I let her because she’s crying. I comfort her since
that’s all I can give her. I don’t know how it happened, but the
next thing I know, Riley is kissing me. I try to push her, but
she’s holding my face in place.

Then I hear a slow intake of breath.
Everything that happens next become slow in motion. I take a step
back, look at the door, and see Rhythm there with a bouquet of
flowers—the flowers I sent her for our 10th month with a note.

Happy 10th month with you,
Blossom. Meet me in my dorm. I have a surprise for you. I love you
so much. xo, your Grant.

This is definitely not the surprise I have
for her. Nonetheless, surprise, surprise.

“Rhy, please let me explain.” I run towards
her, but she runs away from me.

Riley grabs my arm. “Who is she?”

“Shut up, Riley.”

“But—”

“Leave.”

“But—”

“Now!” I don’t mean to shout, but I can’t
take my mind off the look on Rhy’s face.

I immediately run after her, though I’m not
sure where she went. I go to her dorm first, and Lola is on her way
out.

“Grant, you missed Rip. She just went to your
room.”

“She’s not here?”

“No. Why? What happened?”

“Long story, Lols. I somehow messed up. What
should I do? Where should I find her?”

“Why, what happened?” she repeats.

“Talk to you later. Bye, Lols. I’m going
after her.”

“Oka—”

I leave her and find the love of my life.

Rhythm

Déjà vu.

Those words . . .
Rhy, please let me
explain.

And her . . .
Riley
. How can I forget
her?

She got Ben, and now, Grant? Why would fate
do this to me?

The image replays in my mind clearly, over
and over. Grant is holding her, kissing her passionately. We don’t
even hold hands, and he’s kissing another girl. That’s it. Maybe
he’s fine with my rule about the physical thing because he’s doing
it with another girl. The things I cannot give to him, he’s getting
from other girl or girls. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

But I am proud of myself. I’ve never been
more proud of myself than I am now. I made the right decision to
stay pure until I am married.

I remember what Grant told me about how
should I have let Ben explain. Maybe it’s his way of saying that
when it comes to this, I’ll let him explain? Brilliant, Grant.
Genius. I will let you explain, but I will let you grill in your
own misery first. Good luck with that.

I am on my way back to the dorm when I see
Riley.

“Hey, you,” she calls me.

What a beef. Yeah, that’s my poor attempt at
cursing.

“I know you,” she says.

“Of course, you know me. I am Grant’s
girlfriend.”

She laughs hard, which is kind of insulting.
“You? Girlfriend? There must have been misunderstanding between the
two of you. I am Grant’s girlfriend. We’re together for five years
now.”

I compose myself while I compute. Grant
courted me for one year, we are together for almost a year, so he
has a three-year girlfriend when he courted me. That is
if
what she’s telling me is true.

“Really? Then why I haven’t seen you for the
past two years or so? Are you invisible?”
Nice, Rhythm.

“That’s because we have a long-distance
relationship. He’s in Pennsylvania and I’m in Michigan. Yes, that’s
right. I remember you from Michigan. Your name is . . .”

“Rhythm. Rhy.”

“Oh, that’s it. You were the one Ben was
telling me about.”

“Telling you about what?”

“The one who was in his room when he and
I—”

“Okay, stop. I remember it all, very clearly.
Not to worry about the details.” Geez. This girl is a total
beef.

“Déjà vu isn’t it? Ben before. Grant now. Ben
and Grant are mine first, so better back off, understood? I
wouldn’t give up without a fight with Grant. He’s mine.”