Rewriting the Rules (9 page)

“Charlotte.” I look and see him again. In his hands is a bottle of sunscreen and I roll my eyes. “Put this on.”

“No. I want to tan.”

“You’ll burn.”

“Yeah, okay. Unlikely.”

“Put it on.” Taking off my sunglasses I realize he’s not requesting me to put on sunscreen.

He’s demanding I do it.

Simply ignoring him again, I put on my sunglasses and take a sip of my vodka cranberry drink.

“I don’t like you out here without any protection. Let me help you protect that perfect skin of yours,” he whispers in my ear, causing shivers to run down my body, and I’m pretty sure my eyes were closed the whole time his lips were near my ear. Inhaling sharply, I steadily take the sunscreen bottle and pour some in my hands.

“I need help with my back.”

Turning over so my back is facing him, I hear him shuffle, and soon his hands are gently touching me. His touch feels amazing. I relax with each rub of his hands over my shoulders, down my back, and right above my ass.

“My house is quiet without you there.” Leaving his hand on that part of my back I lean into his touch and he doesn’t pull away. “I miss coming home and watching you sing and dance in my living room.”

“I was only there for a night,” my voice is hardly a whisper. I’m not sure where this conversation’s going.

“I know.” His hands rub my shoulders a little harder and it feels so good. Little moans escape my lips and suddenly he stops. “As much as I love having you back here, being with your brother is safe.” I don’t respond. “You know why, don’t you?” I don’t move. His hands on me and the images going on in my head are killing my focus. I swear this fantasy is like a never ending porno video starring Troy and me. “I need you safe. I need you to stay away from me. Any time we’re close, knowing how my touch affects you is . . . is driving me crazy. I’m doing the best I can, so you need to do the same.”

What the what? I have no idea what he’s saying.

“I don’t want to stay away.” Before I can turn around I see him rushing into the house and not turning back to see me. My body is still tingling from his presence. My body is craving him and I want more of that, especially what’s going on in my head. His lips are touching my skin and we’re connected as one.

When Troy’s inside with Will I take out my phone and text Jessica.

Jessica:
Whoa . . . Intense.

Me:
Right? It’s annoying . . . I know Will won’t be happy if I talk to him, and I can’t just yet. Troy and I need to work on us before even getting Will involve.

Jessica:
You’ll figure it out . . . Trust me. Just be patient and remember how much you love him.

Me:
Yeah . . . I know.

Closing my eyes for a moment I relish the way my skin feels. I imagine we’re sitting together and he’s whispering how much he loves me. I wish our lives could be simple. I wish I had the strength to talk to Will.

“One day,” I whisper to myself.

Chapter 11

Troy

Getting into my car, I speed home to get work done. It’s going to be a long day and I need to stay busy without letting myself think about Charlotte. Things are okay for the most part. She has no idea of the damage she left behind and I don’t intend on telling her. Opening those wounds will make it feel raw again. This should be enough for me to not want her. To not crave her. To not let her in my dreams so that I’m not constantly waking up to find my hand wrapped around my cock to find a release. Only there’s a problem I can’t seem to solve.

Charlotte Maxey owns me.

Cursing under my breath, I make it home and lock myself in my office. Logging onto my computer, I read a few emails and try to stay focused with work and what needs to get done. Believe me, I need to get her out of my head. Only the nagging feeling and poking won’t allow me to forget the unanswered questions constantly repeating in my head. With Charlotte, taking chances is similar to leaping into a pit of fire and hoping to come out unburned. In her mind she’s doing what she needs to do to keep the relationship with Will steady and without any drama. I didn’t fight for her then and I don’t plan on fighting for her now.

When she was living in Michigan it was easy to forget her and not wonder what she was doing. Everything was easy because I wasn’t reminded of her.

Now she’s here.

In my town.

In my space.

Fuck.

A Skype request comes in and finally I can focus on my clients.

“Hey coach,” Sarah smiles. “I’m down ten pounds!”

“Hey girl. Nice, that’s awesome. I’m proud of you. How are you feeling?”

“Really good,” she smiles again. “I have so much more energy and I can finally run a mile without wanting to die.” I laugh and listen more to what she’s saying.

An hour passes before another Skype call comes in and soon I’ve talked to five more clients before having to go back and readjust some plans. I love what I do. I love helping people and getting them to where they want to be. Seeing the look of accomplishment always wins out. There are days I want to quit because of the stress and high need for my assistance, but then I talk to my clients and remember why I’m their coach and why I love helping them.

Logging off the computer, I grab my files and call it a day. Everything was going great until a message from Jason popped up on my phone telling me how thankful he is of Charlotte and how great she is. She’s working hard at Exhale Spa and I couldn’t be happier for her. A giant grin is plastered on my face when I read the text from Jason telling me she’s the best manager they’ve had and it’s only been a little less than two weeks. She’s tough, and when she puts her head to something, the girl is relentless and won’t give up. The sudden smile on my face leaves. I shouldn’t be happy or think about how well she’s doing. I did what I did, got her a job, and that’s the end of it. There’s nothing more I want to do or be involved with.

Scrolling through my phone, I find Maxine’s name and see if she’s in town. We went on a few dates and she’s always fun to be with. Nothing’s ever happened between us, but maybe tonight I’m willing to bend my rules and give in to an innocent night of pure pleasure.

Me:
Are you in town?

Maxine:
Well, if it isn’t Troy Harding. Of course I am, dollface ;)

Me:
Dinner tonight. I’ll pick you up at 7.

Maxine:
I can’t wait.

Maxine’s what I need tonight. I can picture her long blonde hair spread over the bed with her legs wrapped around me screaming for more. Yeah she’ll make it better for me.

Dinner goes by without any issues or afterthought. I’m bored to death listening to her talk about herself and modeling, though. If I hear about another designer who ripped off another designer, and this model is doing drugs while the other model is screwing the photographer, I might just jump into oncoming traffic.

“Enough, Maxine,” I tell her as I sign the bill.

“What,” she innocently responds. “I thought you loved listening to me.”

“I do, but I have other ideas. Let’s go.”

“Are we going back to your place,” she eagerly asks, and I have to force myself not to roll my eyes. “I haven’t been over in so long. Maybe we can get breakfast tomorrow morning. I’ve missed you so much. I can’t wait to feel you,” she leans in and whispers in my ear. “I want your hard cock so bad.”

“Maybe another time.”

“Well, I won’t be back from Milan for another eight weeks.”

“Then we’ll get together then.” My tone is clipped and I want more than anything to get away from her. Usually, dirty talk gets me going, but my cock isn’t interested and I’m bored out of my mind.

“You know what, Troy?” I turn to face her as we wait for my car. “You’re an asshole. I mean, you’re the one who asked me out and you didn’t even talk to me during dinner.”

“How can I when you kept going on and on about yourself.”

“Well, whatever,” she brushes off my comment. “What the hell do you want?”

“To see you, Maxine. It’s been a while.”

“Oh bullshit. I’m done. This is the last time you see me, Troy. I hope you choke and die.”

“Okay . . . that’s harsh and childish.” I do my best to hold in my laughter. “Stop being dramatic.”

“Whatever. I’m out. Deuces asshole.”

Deuces?
I roll my eyes and tip the valet for getting my car. Mentally reminding myself to never ask Maxine out . . . ever again.

Chapter 12

Troy

Looking at the meal plan template in front of me, I realize it’s been over thirty minutes since I’ve typed anything. Charlotte’s been on my mind and it’s messing with me
and
my concentration. It’s funny how the thought of her pushes me back and I lose focus. My body is tense and my grip on my wireless mouse tightens. Any thought towards work I have flies from my head and it’s replaced with Charlotte naked and tied to my bed. Her glorious body waiting for me to ravage and take as mine.

Always mine.

I hear the door open and see Jane walk in. The smile on her face radiates and puts a smile on mine.

“What’s up?”

“Just wanted to swing by and see what’s going on with you. Haven’t seen you come by lately. Princess Avery misses you. Things been busy?”

“You can say that.” I shut down my laptop and get up to grab two beers from the mini fridge. Handing her one, I sit back down on my couch and drink.

“Something’s wrong.” I don’t answer. Talking about my feelings isn’t something I’m used to doing. I don’t have heart-to-heart conversations. I’m not the type of guy who will sit and talk about his feelings and cry over why life isn’t fair. I accept what it is and move on. Jane knows me and she knows when to push and back off. Right now, I’m not sure what I want her to do.

“Do you want to talk?”

Apparently, I do.

I tell her about Charlotte coming back and how she first got here. Jane listens, nods, smiles, and doesn’t say anything. She knows about my past with Charlotte and how long I’ve loved her.

“What do you think she’s feeling?”

“I don’t know.” And that’s the truth. She’s here because of a bad breakup and she wants to be back. I’m not sure if she’s interested in me or feels the same as I do. I intend to find out with time.

Jane’s hand rests on mine and her look softens. “You’ve never been like this. In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never had this expression. I saw you with Andrea and knew she was going to screw you over. You never wanted to fall in love, but hearing how much you love her and want her, it’s the best kind of love story. Carter and I have been talking. He thinks you need to talk to Will first and I think you need to take matters in your own hands and talk to her. You never know how long she’ll be around. Carter has a little crush on her too,” she jokes and nudges my shoulder. “We want you happy, honey. And Princess Avery will want the same.”

“It doesn’t matter. She has no idea how badly she hurt me and it’s not something I want to talk to her about. Talking about it means feeling it again. I feel weak when I think about it. I’ve worked my ass off to be where I am today and I don’t intend on going backwards and being that naïve idiot thinking love will conquer all. Fuck that shit.” I lean my head back and look at Jane. “I don’t want to be a mess again. This is who I have to be.”

“You have this stone wall around your heart. I see the pain you hide, and the young and carefree self you want to let out. I know the history between you and Charlotte, and now that she’s back, what are you going to do about it? You’re acting hot and cold and seriously it’s going to get hold and you might lose her for good. She’s a beautiful girl and I don’t think she’s going to wait around and play this game with you.”

I don’t respond. I have no idea what to do or what she wants. The chemistry and heat between us is still the same. Having her under my roof and by my side feels good. She feels good with me, only she can’t be mine. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure of that. It’s easy for me to shut down my feelings. You never know the extent of the feelings you have until you’ve experienced loss and heartbreak. You never want to feel that again, so you block out anything that can trigger those emotions.

“You want to love as much as she does.”

I pull away and she knows the boundaries have been crossed. She’s pushed me and I don’t want to talk anymore.

“Why don’t I make you something to eat and we drink more beer? Sound good?”

I nod and we head out of my office and into the kitchen. I grab a few more beers out and set them on the island. Jane goes to work and makes us lunch. I listen to her talk about Avery and planning her first birthday.

“If you need help with anything, let me know.”

“Of course we will.”

We talk for a little more. Jane’s phone buzzes and she rolls her eyes. “I gotta get going. I guess little Avery has a little accident and Carter’s about to pass out. You be good, okay?”

“Okay.”

“You got this,” she pats my thigh and gives me a smile before leaving.

The wall around my heart is to protect me. I put myself in relationships after Charlotte left because I was looking for her in those women. Some of them made sense in my life, but I never wanted more. The women made things a little easier. I always had someone to be with, and in many ways, trust. Even though I didn’t let them all the way in, they were part of my life.