Revved Up Hearts (20 page)

“You never told me
that.”

“I wanted to, but it never came up until
now.”

“Thanks again, Bryan.” She smiled. “Now eat before it gets
cold.”

After breakfast, Dawn cleaned up the kitchen and made sure Bryan went to the infield care center. During breakfast, she had told him about her dad’s accident. Bryan promised to call Valerie and get the bonus check in the mail to Dawn’s parents as soon as possible. That was a relief to Dawn. She wouldn’t tell them about the money. They would just argue with her about it. If she waited until the check was in her parents’ hands, there wouldn’t be much they could do about it. She called home while the dishes were in the dishwasher. Thanks to pain medicine, her dad had been asleep most of the time he had been home. She chatted with her mom until the dishes were done. Dawn promised to call again tomorrow after her dad’s doctor appointment. She put the dishes away and straightened up the motor coach. She was picking up some of Bryan’s dirty laundry when her cell phone rang. “Hello,” she
answered.

“Good morning, sunshine,” was Jeremiah’s greeting. “What are you
doing?”

“Putting Bryan’s stinky socks in the laundry
hamper.”

“Gross.”

“You’d think gross if you were
here.”

That made Jeremiah laugh. “What are you doing in about an
hour?”

“Laundry. Unless you have a better
idea.”

“As a matter of fact, I do. That’s why I called. There is this huge rollercoaster on the top of one of the buildings here in Vegas. The crew and I are going to go ride it. Wanna come
along?”

“No way! I hate roller
coasters.”

“You hate roller coasters? How is that possible? Everybody loves roller
coasters.”

“Not me. I had a bad experience on one when I was a kid. A team of wild horses couldn’t drag me onto one of those
things.”

“You can still come along, but you don’t have to ride the coaster if you don’t want
to.”

“Okay.”

“Good. I’ll see you in about an hour.” Dawn went along and had a blast. She didn’t ride the coaster but watched as Jeremiah and his crew rode it three times. Jeremiah signed autographs and posed for pictures with fans before leaving. Then Jeremiah bought everybody lunch at an outside café. They walked around for a while, just taking in the sites. They all had their picture taken with an Elvis impersonator with one of the wedding chapels in the background. They walked down most of the famous Las Vegas strip until it was time to get back to the track for practice. Most of the crew went ahead in separate vehicles, but Jeremiah stopped in front of the famous “Welcome to Las Vegas” sign.

“Why are we stopping here?” Dawn asked
him.

“I want our picture taken in front of the
sign.”

“Don’t you want the crew in the picture
too?”

“No, we did that last time we were here. I want a picture of just
us.”

“Okay.” Dawn smiled at him before she undid her seatbelt and slipped out of the truck. Jeremiah took her hand as they walked far enough in front of the sign that it could be seen behind them. There was a family of tourists already out there. Dawn took their picture, and they returned the favor by taking one of her and Jeremiah. They stood side by side and smiled as the picture was taken. Dawn started to go back to the truck, but Jeremiah grabbed her hand and asked for one more. Dawn agreed, but this time Jeremiah turned her to where she was in front of him. His hands were on her hips, and he leaned down to put his head right next to hers. He planted a kiss on her cheek just as the camera flashed. They thanked the family and went back to the truck. They were out on the highway again when Jeremiah finally
spoke.

“Listen, I know we had that conversation about us being just friends, and I respect that, but do you still feel that way about me? We are spending more time together, and it feels like we are getting closer. You let me hold your hand as we walked today. But back there, when I gave you that peck, I could sense you pulling away. So what’s going on between
us?”

“For starters, I have never been comfortable with public displays of affection. I shied away from your kiss because people were watching us. Call my mom and ask her. I always hated visiting with relatives that I hadn’t seen in a while because I knew they would kiss and hug me at the beginning and end of every visit. I very rarely let Kevin kiss me in public, even after we were engaged. So that had nothing to do with you. I know that I send you mixed messages, but I am mixed up. I like you as a friend, and I can see how this friendship could grow into something more…” she trailed off, trying to think of what to say next. Jeremiah didn’t say anything. He let her collect her thoughts and continue. “But when I think about the what-ifs, I think what if he broke my heart. I am over Kevin, but I am afraid to get into another relationship. And you are not to blame for that either. The other thing is that you are not a Christian, Jeremiah. I don’t mean that in a judgmental or harsh way, but the Bible says in 2 Corinthians chapter 6, ‘Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.’ It is so hard to be a Christian while sharing a life with someone who isn’t. You said yourself that you walked away from your faith because you didn’t understand how God could do that to your sister. If we dated, would you go to church with me? Would you turn back to your faith? Turn back to God? I need someone who will be a helpmate to me, not a stumbling block. Again, that is not your fault. I hate to use the old phrase, ‘It’s not you, it’s me,’ but that is the truth of the matter.” Jeremiah didn’t speak for a moment. Dawn could tell by his clinched jaw and his white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel that she had made him angry with her words. “All I have done is made you
mad…”

They drove in silence for a few miles before Jeremiah finally spoke. “I see your point in most of what you said. I will admit that is how I felt when Elizabeth died. I tried not to think about God because I only got angry when I did. Then Mom started going back to church, and I felt so betrayed. I felt like she turned her back on my sister’s memory by choosing God over her. How could she do that to Elizabeth? When she went back to school to take care of other kids, I knew that she hadn’t forgotten about Elizabeth. When my dad went back to church, I had the same feelings all over again. I have talked to both of my parents about it. I know that God didn’t take Elizabeth from us—I really do know that. Mom and Dad talk about seeing her
again…”

“You can see her again, Jeremiah.”

“No, I can’t. Mom and Dad tell me that too, but I have done too much. I can’t forget all the things I’ve done. God will never forgive
me.”

“Yes, he will. Romans 5:8 says, ‘But God commendeth his love for us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.’ Jesus died on the cross before you were born because he knew that you would sin. He died before you did anything, so that he could forgive you for
everything.”

“I know. I’ve heard it all before. I’m just not sure that I believe
it.”

“Jeremiah, yesterday when you heard about my dad’s accident, you said that you would pray for him. Did you mean
that?”

“Yes.”

“Have you prayed for
him?”

“Yes.”

“Who did you pray
to?”

“Jesus, of
course.”

“Why?”

“Because ‘by his stripes we are
healed’.”

“Why do you believe that part of the story but not the
end?”

“I don’t know,” Jeremiah answered in frustration. They had arrived at the track during the conversation. They had been sitting in the truck talking, but Jeremiah had been looking off, looking anywhere but at Dawn. Now, however, he focused on her. She could see the tears in his eyes. “I prayed for God to heal Elizabeth, and he didn’t. For a long time, I would not pray. But over the years I have seen God answer prayers. I do pray sometimes, but I don’t always trust that he will answer the
prayer.”

“Then why do you
pray?”

“It just seems like the right thing to do. And it makes me feel
better.”

“God answers all prayers, Jeremiah, but he answers them in his way, in his time, according to his will. That isn’t always what we want, so it seems like he didn’t answer. But he
did.”

Jeremiah nodded and swiped a tear from his eye. “I know. I’ve heard it before, and somewhere deep in my heart I know what you are saying is true. My head just won’t accept
it.”

“That is where the faith comes in, Jeremiah,” Dawn said as she reached out and took his hand. “Faith is accepting what your heart and soul tells you when your mind can’t logically explain
it.”

“I do know that God brought you into my life,” he told her. “Like I said, I’ve heard it before, but it makes more sense when you say it.” He opened his mouth to say more but stopped when he heard a motor rev in the background. He looked at his watch. “I’m late for final practice.” He looked back at her. “I want to talk about this more, but if I am any later for practice, I’ll get a
fine.”

“Go,” she told him. “Run. I’ll see you later.” She watched as he sprinted toward pit road. “That went well, Lord,” she prayed. “His heart is open to you. Thank you for giving me the words to say. Please give me another chance to talk to him some more about you. Thank you, Father. I love you. Amen.”

When Dawn finally made it to practice, Bryan was already on the track. He had been cleared to race on the conditions that he went back to the care center for fluids after practice, that he got at least eight hours of sleep tonight, and that he went back to the care center for more fluids before the race in the morning. Travis filled her in while they watched practice. When Bryan got out of the car, she could tell that he was still weak, but he definitely looked better. His color was returning. After practice, Dawn went with Bryan to an appearance. One of his sponsors was a nationwide chain of furniture stores. One of them was in Las Vegas, so Bryan went there every time he was in town. On the way there, Dawn told him about her conversation with Jeremiah. Bryan said that it was good news and promised to pray for him. She got back to the track just in time to go to Jeremiah’s fan club meeting. They didn’t get a chance to talk about God again, but that was okay.
It is all about God’s time
, she reminded herself. When she got back to her hotel room at 11:30 that night, she was absolutely exhausted. Jeremiah wanted her to go back to the casino with him, but she was just too tired. And she still needed to pack her things so that she could check out first thing in the morning before the race. Dawn decided it would have to wait. She was going to bed. Right before she nodded off, she rolled over and spied her Bible on the desk. She hadn’t read it today.
So much for doing better in that area
. But it had been such a wonderful day. God had given her a wonderful opportunity to talk to Jeremiah about his spiritual life.
I’ll read it twice as much tomorrow
, she thought right before she fell
asleep.