Revenge of the Giant Robot Chickens (2 page)

It took ages to get to sleep. I spent most of the time staring at the ceiling, trying to forget what had happened that day. I must have dozed off at some point, though, because the next thing I knew the alarm was going off. I groaned and idly hit it to shut it up.

The sun must have just started rising because it was still fairly dark. The only light was a thin red line that stretched across the wall. I stared at it for a while, my brain not fully working yet. I was tempted to just lie there. Let the rest of the world take care of itself. Just stay in bed and sleep this reality away.

But I couldn’t do that. So I heaved myself to my feet and started to get dressed.

At least I had my own room these days. The brief respite from chicken attacks following the Battle of Pittodrie had given us time to get properly organised and make a few safe havens in the city. Now that the chickens weren’t such an immediate threat we didn’t have to hide underground, so we moved into hotels instead.

We’d all mostly banded together out of a need to stay safe, and we’d set up a general council, which I had a seat on. But most kids still stuck with the groups they’d been in before. Not quite one big happy family. I still wasn’t part of a group exactly. I tried to keep the peace and had picked up the nickname, the ‘Ambassador’.

I spent most of my time with the Railway Gang, led by Noah. The hotel right next to the station had been transformed into council headquarters.

Jesse didn’t belong to a gang these days either. I guess we’d formed one of our own, just him and me. When he wasn’t off on solo missions, Jesse’s room was next door to mine. We were close to the Brotherhood headquarters as well. One of our jobs was to keep an eye on them. When the chickens first attacked, a cult had formed called The Brotherhood of the Egg: a bunch of scared kids who worshipped the chicken overlords like gods. They dressed in chicken costumes and took on chickeny names. But the chickens just used them for information then betrayed them. Their leader Egbert was pecked up like a grain of corn, like all the other kids. Now they were just called the Brotherhood, and they were on our side – or so they said. But we needed to keep a close eye on them. I did it because my sister Hazel was their new leader. Jesse did it because they were the only ones who laughed at his jokes. That was just like Jesse. He…

I needed to stop thinking about Jesse. The longer we went without hearing from him, the more I worried. If he never turned up again… I’m not sure what I would do. And there was a good chance of that.

At least I wouldn’t see him be taken. That would be the worst thing I could possibly imagine.

I quickly got washed and dressed, then I left my room and turned down the corridor.

I found Noah in the communications room. When I’d first met him he was a scared kid, about my own age but a lot scrawnier. We’d all been forced to lose weight and swap fat for muscle. Noah had really manned up. He was still scrawny but much stronger and he wasn’t as scared any more. Or at least he didn’t show it. We had all learned to control our fear in the chicken apocalypse.

“Hey,” he said, idly sipping a mug of tea. All around us computers were beeping and kids were tapping at keyboards. It was a confusing mishmash of technology, old and new. On one side of the room we had Apple Macs, looted from the nearby Apple store. On the other kids sat next to radios, listening intently with their headphones and twiddling knobs. In a corner was a bunch of TVs, some getting intermittent reception from TV channels worldwide, others tuned in to the chickens’ own news channel. A chicken in a ridiculous hat flickered across one of the screens but I couldn’t hear what it was saying.

Communication was important. We hadn’t heard anything from the rest of the UK for a long time. I knew that the army had been smashed and the chickens had almost complete control. From the little we’d heard, Aberdeen was the only place that wasn’t completely under chicken control. So we needed to know what was going on abroad. It gave us hope to know that the Americans and most of the rest of the world were still there, still fighting.

It was a shame they weren’t winning.

“Hey,” I replied. “What’s going on? Anything new?”

Noah winced then nodded. “Poland’s gone.”

I felt my heart freeze. “All of it?”

“Yup.” He took another sip from his mug. “The chief chicken broadcast a message a few hours ago. They completely surrendered. I think their army lost a big battle. Or maybe they just got tired of fighting. It’s happened before.”

“But they were the last ones left.”

He sighed. “I know. That’s Europe gone. The council are not going to be happy about that when I tell them.”

“Shouldn’t Glen tell the council? He’s Head of Communication after all. It should be him.”

Noah gave his twisted smile and shrug combo. “You know him. He doesn’t like being anywhere near Cody.”

“Can’t really blame him.” Someone handed me a mug of tea and I took it with thanks. A lot of us had started drinking tea lately. It cost a lot of electricity to heat the water but these days we had more than enough. One of the first things we did after the Battle of Pittodrie was to get a power station running again. The Brotherhood, in an attempt to show they could be useful, had marched to the onshore control centre of the Aberdeen Bay Wind Farm to assess the situation. I’m not sure what they did – Jesse thought they just pressed buttons until things started happening – but the turbines started turning and we had power. It meant we could have light, heat and most gadgets, except our mobile phones. Getting electricity back, more than anything else, convinced a lot of people that
we were strong enough to fight the chickens.

Even now, though, some people thought we were doing the wrong thing; that it would be safer to just give in. And it wasn’t even the Brotherhood like you’d expect. They were watched very closely but seemed happy enough to be out from under the clawed foot of chicken oppression.

Glen came bustling over while the tea was working its magic. Unlike Noah he hadn’t shed any of the excess weight he’d been carrying for as long as I knew him. Though since he spent most of his time in this room I suppose that wasn’t a surprise.

“Noah, Ambassador.” He nodded to me before getting right to the point. “There’s a council meeting today, right?”

“Yes, Glen,” Noah said wearily. We both knew where this was going.

Glen picked up on his tone. “You may be getting tired of this but it’s important. If you could get the GPS satellite locator then we could send messages out as well as receiving them. We might even be able to contact the Allied army.”

“I know, I know, but you’ve been asking about this for ages. Nothing’s changed. You’ll get the same answer,” Noah replied.

“Even so, ask again. It’s vital that we regain contact with the outside world. If they knew we were here…”

“…they’d launch an all-out rescue attempt, going deep into chicken territory, which they’ve not managed in any way, just to save a bunch of kids who are
surviving on their own?” finished Noah. He raised an eyebrow. “Do you really think that will happen?”

Glen shrugged. “It’s worth a shot.”

“Yes it is,” I said, before a fight could break out. “But getting the satellite locator would be a dangerous mission and it might attract unwanted attention. You know that.”

“You made me Head of Communication. I’m just doing my job.”

“So you’ll tell the council about it in person?” Noah cut in.

“Noooo… I’m busy here.” Glen looked about shiftily. “But you can ask for me.”

“Fine,” Noah said, resigned. “You’ll need a miracle though.”

“It’s just important that you ask,” Glen said, before walking back to his desk in front of a TV.

“Come on,” Noah said, glancing at a watch. He reached behind him and grabbed a portable TV from the table. “We should go. The council meeting will start soon.”

I groaned but straightened up from where I’d been leaning against a desk and followed him out the door. “What are we meeting about today?”

“The usual. Updates about what’s been going on. They’ll probably want a report from you about Jesse.”

Yay. Sounded like a barrel of laughs.

It was impossible for one person to be in charge of all the gangs that had sprung up around Aberdeen since the chickens first attacked, but we couldn’t afford to be divided. So the council had formed, all the influential people in Aberdeen coming together to discuss how best to survive in this harsh new world.

Or at least that was the theory. What actually happened most of the time was a lot of arguing.

It would probably be like that today. When Noah and I arrived Cody was already there, Percy the ever-attentive shadow at his right hand. Cody was our strategist, working out how to survive in the long term. Sadly that seemed to make him think he was our leader. Today he’d taken his place at the head of the table as usual. He liked making displays of power. At first Noah had tried to fight him, getting there extra early, but now he’d given up. There was no point. He saved his energy for fighting Cody when they disagreed. Which was all the time.

Halfway down the table was Jeremy. I gave him a wave and he grinned back at me. Jeremy was in charge of scouting and looking for supplies. The chickens had left some warehouses around the place, all stuffed with things to eat, but they couldn’t last long. Jeremy and his team were in charge of going through the houses and shops in Aberdeen and collecting any tins or other lasting supplies. They weren’t supposed to
take anything else but I knew they did. I didn’t like the stealing and others felt the same, but there wasn’t much we could do about it. We needed that food and we couldn’t watch everyone.

Next to Jeremy was Deborah, looking as if she wanted to be somewhere else. Her hair was tied back neatly and her well-scrubbed hands were fidgeting on the table. Deborah didn’t like coming to meetings, feeling that she had better things to do. I agreed. After all she was our head doctor. Well, I say doctor. We didn’t have doctors. But we did have kids whose parents had been doctors or who had wanted to be doctors. They spent all their time with a medical textbook in one hand and a dictionary in the other. They weren’t professionals but everyone felt lucky to have them.

Sally sat across from Deborah, looking the complete opposite. Her face was covered with dirt and she pushed her scruffy hair out of her eyes with muddy fingers. She was staring into space and seemed disconnected from the world around her. But Sally might be the most important person at the table.

All our food came from scavenging and we knew this was a problem. Before the chickens attacked, Aberdeen had about quarter of a million citizens, most of them adults. We now had less than five hundred kids. While most of the fresh vegetables, meat, milk and juice had rotted away, there was enough stuff in tins lying around to last for a while. But not forever. Eventually the tins would run out and we’d starve. Some rationing was
already in place. When the chickens were gone for a while, something had to be done.

Sally had come up with the solution. Like Jesse and myself she was one of the few kids who hadn’t lived in Aberdeen before the attacks. She’d lived with her parents on a farm just outside the city. I don’t know how she’d got here – not all kids were comfortable talking about ‘That Day’ – but I was glad she was with us. It had been her idea to start growing crops. She taught people how to dig up vegetable gardens and allotments. She dug over a nearby park, planting row after row of vegetable seeds and some fruit canes as well. We were all looking forward to the day we could have potatoes and carrots again.

My sister Hazel sat a bit apart from everyone else. Nobody really trusted the Brotherhood right now. When the chickens had been driven out of Aberdeen some of them had left and joined other groups but a solid core had stayed together. They kept themselves to themselves, mostly, hanging out in a big warehouse that they’d taken over down by the docks. They still wore white robes covered in feathers, though they’d got rid of the masks and the dinosaur slippers. There had been talk of throwing them out of Aberdeen or feeding them to the chickens but the council had put a stop to that. The fact of the matter was, we needed them. Without them we wouldn’t have electricity, lasers, or a number of other useful devices that they made out of the wrecks of Catchers. So for the moment they
stayed. But that didn’t mean they were liked.

Hazel nodded at me when I came in, then went back to glaring at the last member of the council: Blake. Blake was dangerous. In theory I should like him. He was absolutely dedicated to fighting chickens. He excelled at it. And that was the problem. I’d once been that fanatical about beating the chickens. I’d gathered everyone together in a mad plan to defeat our enemy. And nearly everyone in Aberdeen had been caught because of it.

Then there was my other problem with Blake. He didn’t fight chickens because he hated them, or because he felt driven to. He did it because he thought it was fun.

With the founding of the council Blake had found his role in life. He led and trained our army; what there was of it. He even had a special team that tracked down trouble and dealt with it. And he was very good at his job. I was happy he did it. I would just be happier if he did it a long, long way from me.

In some respects his job was similar to mine. He fought chickens; I fought to keep us all together. Whenever groups were arguing or we heard about another bunch of kids hiding away somewhere, I was sent to deal with it. I was also sent to deal with the Brotherhood when people stopped trusting them; the scavengers when they kept food for themselves; the communicators when they spent more time watching old movies than keeping an ear out for approaching Catchers; and the farmers when they got
into arguments and started throwing mud around. Basically I was sent to deal with the most pressing problems of the day.

Hazel, Cody, Percy, Blake, Sally, Jeremy, Deborah, Noah, Glen and me: the team that stood between Aberdeen and the chickens.

Cody called the meeting to order, as usual. “Attention. Attention. Shall we begin?”

The room grew quiet and people turned to look at him. I took a seat and enjoyed the brief peace. I knew from experience that it wasn’t likely to last long.

“Now, I think Noah has something to tell us. Noah?”

Noah nodded to Cody and stood, placing the TV on the table. He looked grim.

“Europe has fallen.”

There was instant chaos at his words. People began yelling, some screaming. Cody banged on the table a few times with a judge’s hammer, though I’ve no idea where he’d got it from.

“Let him finish. Then freak out,” he said, and order was restored.

Noah took a deep breath and continued, “Poland surrendered early this  morning. The chickens recorded it and their leader has been broadcasting it ever since.”

The TV screen fuzzed for a moment then lit up. I could see the chickens’ leader, known to us as King Cluck, glaring straight at the camera, just an ordinary cockerel wearing what looked like an upside-down colander on his head. Wires trailed around it, and lights flashed and blinked. Behind him was a flag,
half white, half red. He’d be hilarious if he didn’t keep taking over countries.

“People of the world. I know you can hear me.” The voice was weird, seeming to come from everywhere at once. King Cluck’s beak didn’t ever move. He just stared at the screen.

“Poland has fallen and is ours. The following changes will be made. As it is now part of the glorious Chicken Empire the name of the capital will be changed from Warsaw to Warsquawk. The flag will also change appropriately. Red and white are not good colours.” Behind him a new flag appeared, striped green and yellow. Briefly a picture flashed up, of a white bird on a red background wearing a crown. “The coat of arms is, however, acceptable.

“Now that we have Poland you must be wondering what we’ll do next. The answer is Turkey. We will complete our long-term goal of conquering that country and renaming it Chicken. Because we are the superior bird and we will conquer the world!” King Cluck started cackling.

Noah reached forward and turned off the TV. “That chicken is crazy.”

“Yeah, but he’s beating us,” Hazel chimed in.

Cody sighed. “Yes he is. What about resistance in other countries or cities? Are any of them fighting back?”

Noah shrugged. “We don’t know. The truth is they could be and we just haven’t heard anything. We sometimes intercept communications from big countries like America who have satellites, but we haven’t recently.
Of course if you want us to contact them we could try to get that thing Glen keeps asking about.”

“The magic satellite whatsit that will solve all our problems?” Cody rolled his eyes. “The one that’s miles away in Garthdee, an area we haven’t even begun to explore yet, which is probably very dangerous?  No, we’re not going to get it. We need Glen. Every council member is too precious to risk, especially those who can’t take care of themselves. Glen is our communications expert. If we lost him, what would we do?”

“Why can’t someone else just go get it?” Sally spoke up.

“We don’t know what it looks like,” I told her. “Glen would have to come with us and it’s quite far away.”

“So why do we need it anyway? We’re getting signals from America and Europe. Why can’t we send them back?”

“From what Glen tells me it’s not that easy.” Noah made a circular shape in the air with his hands. “Earth is a ball, right? Well we can only send signals in straight lines. To get them as far as America or somewhere we’d have to bounce the signals off satellites. To find the satellites we need that device.”

“Which is too risky right now.” Cody interrupted. “You can tell Glen – again – that he’ll get the chance when we need it. Let’s move on.”

Noah winced, obviously not happy with Cody’s decision but unwilling to fight him over it. He sat back down.

“Now, there was an attack yesterday. The foraging teams were hit and several people were abducted.
We were well prepared, but our effort proved… inconclusive,” said Cody.

I saw again Sam getting plucked into the air and heard the wails of his sister as I told her what had happened. She was probably still in her room sobbing. They’d only been back together for a few months but I could tell they were very close. We had to keep an eye on her. A few siblings and friends had given themselves up to the chickens after their loved ones were taken. They were so desperate to see them again.

“These attacks are getting more frequent but they’re sending less experienced chickens, which are less of a danger,” Cody continued.  “That means—”

But we didn’t get to find out what it meant, because that’s when the  giant robot chicken burst through the ceiling.